CHAPTER 11 - FAMILY COMMITMENT - THE BIRTH OF LUCY TRACY -
PART FOUR - FACING TRAGEDY
Jeff Tracy gratefully sipped a cup of fresh coffee and glanced up at the clock on the opposite wall. He knew he had looked at that clock at least thirty times in the last fifteen minutes; the fifteen long, drawn-out minutes his son had been in the next room quietly speaking with Doctor Kingsley.
He fully expected Alan would have returned by now to ask his advice about what to do. He knew the decision couldn't be delayed much longer without risking both Tin-Tin and the child.
Jeff frowned. He knew what he was going to say about that decision too contrary to the feelings on the other side of the room.
Alan needed to be told and would be told in no uncertain terms that Tin-Tin's life had to be of paramount importance during the operation. Everything possible had to be done by Doctor Chan to ensure her survival and hopefully things would still turn out all right for the baby. Doctor Sommerville had been brought in to attend to the baby at birth, and as far as Jeff Tracy was concerned, things in that quarter seemed perfectly under control.
Tin-Tin on the other hand...he knew full well from his own experience that anything could happen there.
Jeff had spoken briefly with Doctor Chan on arrival at the hospital, and after meeting the man felt reassured he was placing Tin-Tin in extremely competent hands. It was obvious by his manner that Chan was a master; renowned for excellence in his field. He exuded a type of confidence that he trusted immediately. Nevertheless, he had been adamant about his expectations and made sure Chan fully understood them. Unlike what had happened with Lucy when the only focus had been to deliver Alan instead of the manner in which it was done, Chan's priority had to be Tin-Tin.
"Alan will feel the same way I do." he assured himself. "He won't allow Tin-Tin to be mindlessly cut open with no thought for what could actually happen to her afterwards. That's what happened to his mother and I sure as hell won't allow it to happen to any member of this family again."
He looked anxiously towards the door.
Kyrano also sipped his coffee but his eyes stared blankly at the opposite wall. The fate of his daughter and his grandchild now lay solely in the hands of the Tracy family. The family headed by a Father who sat stubbornly on the other side of the room refusing to give an inch because it would affect his son. The family whose youngest son had come to him only seven months ago asking for his blessing on the marriage he had made with his daughter. Kyrano knew Alan Tracy loved his daughter. He also knew Alan Tracy. Kyrano was convinced Alan's reaction would reflect his wild-child personality; thinking of no one but himself. Alan Tracy would choose his wife.
Kyrano frowned.
"Mr. Alan must understand the importance Tin-Tin has placed on their child," he thought to himself with determination. "He must not be influenced by his Father on this occasion. He must listen to me and allow the child to be birthed immediately. If he does not, this will have all been for nothing as far as Tin-Tin is concerned."
He too looked anxiously towards the door.
It had become obvious that things were moving towards getting the caesarean section underway. Nursing staff were now walking with a definite purpose and intent. There was the distinct rattle of instruments being prepared in the nearby theatre. An incubator was wheeled past and disappeared through the theatre doors. Another Doctor, unrecognisable to both of them walked with a hurried stride and entered the double doors. They both assumed he was the anaesthetist.
Kyrano looked over to where Jeff Tracy sat. He was looking at Kyrano. Their eyes met. Both of them said nothing. They both looked away unwaveringly. Their positions on the matter were clear.
"Alan you must listen to me." his Father reflected looking in the direction of the door. "Believe me son; I've been through this before."
Kyrano swallowed and closed his eyes as if somehow trying to communicate his point of view into the next room. "Mr. Alan you must listen to me. My daughter has definite priorities."
Both Fathers suddenly rose to their feet.
Doctor Reginald Kingsley had hurriedly left the room where he had been discussing the matter with Alan Tracy and was heading towards the operating theatre. The length of his stride indicated a purpose. As he walked he appeared to be paging someone.
He intentionally did not look sideways at the two men despite feeling their eyes on him. He didn't want or quite frankly need to get into an argument with either of them right now.
"Doctor Kingsley." boomed Jeff Tracy's authoritative voice. "What's happening? Where is my son?"
Reginald Kingsley stopped in mid-stride and turned to look him. Tall, powerful and influential this Jeff Tracy may be, Kingsley thought, but he is not the Father of this baby.
"Mr. Tracy," he said solemnly. "Your son has been taken at his own request to be alone with his wife."
"And?" he barked.
"Mrs.Tracy will receive theatre in three minutes."
Jeff shook his head. How in the heck could he think he'd be taking her to theatre? They hadn't discussed what they were going to do yet!
"With respect Doctor Kingsley…three minutes is not long enough for me to discuss this matter with my son. You must understand that the decision you are asking him to make will affect his whole life."
Kyrano nodded. He wanted to talk to Alan too.
Jeff was pleased Kyrano was finally agreeing with something he was saying at least. He didn't particularly care about what Kyrano had to say but he knew he himself couldn't convey everything he needed to say to Alan in only three minutes. Not and expect him to absorb it and make the right decision.
"And", Jeff Tracy thought. "He will make the right decision. I'll be seeing to that."
"Mr. Tracy. The decision has already been made. Your son has requested that the child's delivery be prioritised immediately. I have given him a final three minutes to be with his wife in the event of further complications. Please excuse me…"
Jeff Tracy saw red as the realisation dawned that his son had made his decision without consultation with anyone. How could Alan even consider doing such a thing? This girl was his wife, his life-long partner. Did he realise what would happen if she died? Did he understand he would be left with a baby he didn't know how to care for? Did he understand how hopeless and inadequate he was going to feel? How exhausted and downright useless he would be as a sole parent of a newborn? A man trying to cope without his wife…
"He'd never forget that crying…that dreadful relentless crying of his newborn son that went on and on for hours no matter what he did to try to settle him. It was three o'clock on the morning and Alan had been crying for over two hours. It had been the same thing night after night after night. He'd fed him…he'd changed him…he'd rocked him…he'd even tried to sing to him but realised he didn't know any songs to sing. Not like she had. He'd walked around and around the room with him but still he screamed. He'd put him back in his cot still screaming. He'd covered his own head with his pillow trying to shut the noise out. The other baby was awake now, only thirteen months older, wanting to be held too. The crying continued unabated and inconsolable. His cries were inconsolable too. "Lucy I don't know what to do." he remembered sobbing as exhaustion, grief and hopelessness took over. "I can't cope with this. I can't do this without you."
Jeff frowned. Alan couldn't possibly understand what he was doing by choosing the baby. He had to make him reconsider.
"No Kingsley." he snapped. "The operation cannot proceed until I speak with him. Alan is very young and obviously isn't thinking straight."
"I assure you Mr Tracy your son did not make this decision lightly." Doctor Kingsley said quietly. "And for what it's worth he seems to be thinking a hell of a lot straighter than either you or Mr. Kyrano right now. Now if you will please excuse me. Mrs. Tracy is my patient and I am most anxious to try to do everything I can to assist Dr. Chan with delivering her child."
With that he turned and pushed open the theatre doors and disappeared from view. The sound of the doors falling closed behind him echoed in the waiting room where Jeff Tracy stood stunned.
He felt Kyrano eyeing him quietly.
"So Kyrano." he said without emotion and without acknowledging him. "It appears both you and my son are prepared to allow Tracy history to repeat itself. Forgive me if I don't share your sentiment or think particularly highly of it."
Kyrano did not reply.
He knew Alan would have made his decision based on what he thought Tin-Tin would have wanted, not on how he felt himself. He had to admire the commitment of the youngest Tracy son. He was yet again fulfilling the promise he had made to him that night in his apartments. He would put Tin-Tin's needs first.
"Things will be different now Sir." he had said. Kyrano now knew how much he had meant it.
Kyrano felt tears welling in his eyes. Surely Jeff Tracy didn't think this was easy for him. Surely he didn't think that because he allowed his daughter to constantly put her life on the line for International Rescue that he found it easy to allow her to do the same to bring a Tracy child into the world. Surely he understood this was breaking his heart.
The silence continued painfully for another few minutes. People came and went but the arrival of the tall, thin man shook Kyrano to the core. He grimaced as the final realisation of what was about to occur loomed up and silently slapped him in the face. The man walked hastily towards the theatre.
It was the Hospital Chaplain.
Kyrano knew Dr. Kingsley would have paged the Chaplain for only one reason…to be on hand in the event of last rites being needed for his daughter.
He hung his head.
"My sweet child." he thought desolately as tears fell from his eyes. "Give me the courage to continue to support you in your wishes despite how wrong it seems to me at this moment."
He looked helplessly in the Chaplain.
"All of this simply cannot be Tinarda," he whispered. "It simply cannot be."
The Chaplain quietly entered a small room adjoining the operating theatre as Kyrano continued to reflect wretchedly on the impending impact of the decision to save the Tracy baby.
"I am aware of your wishes Tinarda and I must focus on this my daughter…" he swallowed brushing away the stream of tears which now refused to be stemmed. "I know you would want your little one to live...I know you would give your life for the Tracy family... but you are still my daughter...my precious child...all I have in this life…"
Kyrano buried his face in his hands and began to sob as his resolve broke.
"Tinarda…my little girl." he cried as grief tore through his soul.
"How can I be about to let this happen to you."
They had waited until the Chaplain had finished and then shown him into the small room where she lay alone awaiting theatre. The room was impersonal he noticed. She wouldn't like being in a room like this.
They had only given him three minutes.
He could hear the sound of instruments in the operating theatre next door and the voices of Doctors Kingsley and Chan.
Just three minutes.
Three minutes to say everything he needed to say in case he never got the chance to say anything to her again. Three minutes to put into words everything he felt for her. Three minutes for the three of them to be together as a family. Three minutes for him to say his goodbyes to the girl he had loved for the last twelve years of his life.
In three minutes Tinarda Jane Tracy would be taken away from him to theatre for Doctor Chan to deliver their baby by Caesarean section. Doctor Chan had specifically requested that he not be present in theatre. This was not a routine C-Section and the result was uncertain.
Lucy Josephine would hopefully survive theatre and be stabilised under the care of Dr. Sommerville.
Doctors Kingsley and Chan would then try to stabilise Tin-Tin once that was done. Hopefully her eclamptic toxaemia would begin to abate once Lucy had been taken.
Hopefully they would come back to him and these goodbyes wouldn't be needed after all.
But the signs were not good and Alan Tracy knew it. It was more than clearly being driven home to him, as he stood alone in darkened room looking desolately at the bed where the most precious possession in his life lay.
His best friend; Tin-Tin Kyrano.
Her face was almost unrecognisable. The swelling had contorted her pretty features to the point where he could not distinguish them any more. Her stomach was massively distended; twice the size it had been less than three weeks ago when he had last seen her. Her body convulsed periodically despite the drugs they had given her. The spasms of her body upset the regular movement of the respirator.
The respirator they had connected to keep her alive.
She was comatose.
He couldn't believe this had been allowed to happen to her and stood there aghast.
The beeping of the monitors reminded him the valuable seconds they had given him were ticking away. He couldn't speak. He didn't know what to say.
But he had to say something. Alan Tracy steeled himself.
"Hey there good lookin'," he began in his usual teasing manner, rubbing his hand across her forehead. "I can't leave you alone for five minutes can I? Look what you've gone and done to yourself now. "
Silence.
No. He couldn't keep this up. He couldn't tease her. Not now. He sat down on the bed next to her and hung his head in silence.
"Oh baby." he breathed fighting back his tears. "What have I done to you?"
The monitor regulating Tin-Tin's heartbeat slowed down and then picked up speed again. The monitor regulating their baby was erratic.
He picked up her left hand and squeezed it as he whispered.
"Baby I'm so sorry. This wasn't how this was meant to turn out. You were supposed to yell and carry on and blame me for your labour pains and I was supposed to sit by you and hold your hand like Dad told me."
Silence.
"But now there isn't going to be any labour pains and I'm not going to be allowed to sit beside you. I… I would if Doctor Chan would let me Tin-Tin; honest."
Silence.
"But me saying that is no comfort to you is it baby? The bottom line for you is that I've failed you again. I ruined the wedding you wanted and now I've wrecked this for you too. I just can't seem to get things right where you are concerned can I. I never have."
He lifted her fingers to his lips. Her fingers were swollen and rigid. But he smelt it. That musk scent. The scent he loved and had not experienced in over three weeks. His lips lingered as he breathed it in.
"Oh Baby." the thoughts passed through his mind. "That's you. That's us. "
He continued to speak.
"Tin-Tin I know I wasn't there when you needed me. Honey; please believe that I wanted to be. There's nowhere else I'd rather be than with you. I didn't have a choice this time. Now it's too late. I'm here now but you don't even know that. "
Both monitors slowed down. Alan's blue eyes looked alarmed. Both monitors sped up again.
He reached out and stroked her cheek.
"They've given me three minutes baby that's all and I know I can't say everything I want to say to you in three minutes… But the Doctor says he can't give me any more time than that."
Silence.
"Um…you see they tell me you and Lucy don't have much time left as it is so...um… Tin-Tin I want to say as much as I can to you before they take you away from me. You see baby …um… you might not make it…and if you don't…um…there's some things… I…um…"
He wiped his cheeks with his free hand as he tried to compose himself.
"You and me Tin-Tin. The two of us achieved lots of milestones in only three minutes over the years didn't we baby?"
He took a deep breath.
"Remember when you used to help me do my homework in the corridor just before we went into class? We were in the sixth grade. I never did my homework. Too busy playing ball I guess. You were so clever at Math. I swear what took me an hour only took you three minutes."
Silence.
"It made you mad but you always did it for me because I was your best friend."
He smiled wistfully.
"Yeah Tin-Tin. We were only friends back then."
The seconds ticked away.
The respirator gently moved up and down.
"Then there was that time near the fire. Do you remember that? It was the night you, Gordon and me were allowed to light the fire and sit out on the beach all night. You had just turned sixteen. I was still fifteen."
The silence was now his own as his bottom lip trembled. He remembered that so clearly.
"Tin-Tin...you sat opposite me and I looked at you through the flames in a way I had never looked at you before. I'd lived with you for seven years but I had never noticed until that night just how beautiful you were. All of a sudden I realised how much I loved your eyes, your smile, your hair...and you. I swear you took my breath away."
His own breath faltered.
"Tin-Tin I undressed you and made love to you with my eyes that night. I've never told you that before now but it's true. And I'll tell you this too. From that night on I lived for the time that my lovemaking would not just be with my eyes. I wanted it to come from me. All of me."
Silence.
"That was the night Tin-Tin. It took me three minutes. Three minutes of looking at you through those flames to fall totally, utterly and hopelessly in love with you."
The monitors gathered intensity.
"And baby," he whispered. "I've loved you ever since."
He glanced at the monitors again.
"You know Tin-Tin now that I think about it; we even made Lucy together in only three minutes. Remember that night in my suite? Oh God I do. I remember every last detail of seeing you like that for the first time. Those three minutes were the most memorable and wonderful three minutes of my life."
He paused.
"I will always treasure that first night we were together…I'll remember how scared you were and trying not to show it... how worried I was that you'd think I was treating you like one of those girls in College who meant nothing to me."
He fell silent. There had been more to it than his fear of treating her badly. Much more.
"But you know Tin-Tin I was more worried that night because you were my best friend and best friends aren't supposed to become lovers."
He paused and then added softly.
"Well not you and me anyway. It didn't seem right somehow."
He saw in his mind his nine-year old friend giving him their secret handshake. He then remembered his twenty-one year old friend secretly giving him everything.
"I don't think either of us gave any thought to the possibility that this little baby of ours would be the result of what you gave me that night. I should have been more responsible instead of thinking about myself shouldn't I?"
Silence. He knew he should have taken precautions.
"But if I had we wouldn't have Lucy Josephine. She will always be special to me Tin-Tin. She will never allow me to forget the night my best friend became more than my best friend. "
He paused.
"The night my best friend gave me everything."
He swallowed.
"The night I gave her everything I could in return."
Alan Tracy bent forward to kiss her forehead.
"Tinarda …Tin-Tin…ummm…They'll be coming to take you next door soon and I have to say goodbye. If you don't come back to me I just want to tell you how sorry I am that I took away so much of your happiness over the twelve years I've known you… "
Silence.
"For all the stupid and embarrassing things I did to you. There was no excuse for those things I did to you when you were growing into a woman."
The sound of a muffled sob.
"I'm so sorry for letting you down and trying to have you abort our baby."
Silence.
"Baby if I ever get the chance to make all of this up to you I will. I promise. ... I love you…I do… Tin-Tin…please… please don't leave me alone…"
His eyes suddenly riveted from her face to the machinery in panic.
"Oh no…" he breathed as he realised what was happening."No…Tin-Tin….No!"
The monitor regulating Tinarda Jane Tracy had stopped. A small trickle of blood began to flow from her nose.
The monitor regulating Lucy Josephine Tracy had stopped too.
Kyrano heard Alan Tracy scream from where he sat in the waiting room. He rose from his seat in alarm.
He watched helplessly as Doctors Chan, Kingsley and Sommerville ran out of theatre and into the small room where Tin-Tin lay.
He tried to follow them into the room.
Jeff Tracy, who had been standing quietly in the doorway listening to his son for the past three minutes grasped Kyrano by the shoulders and stood in his path.
"No old friend." he said, his voice torn with emotion. "Don't go in there."
He pulled Kyrano to him with both of his arms. Kyrano leaned against his chest almost collapsing with grief.
"Mr. Tracy. She's my daughter!" he sobbed.
Jeff Tracy didn't notice his own cheeks were wet with tears but he heard his own voice whisper in devastation.
"I know Kyrano. She's my daughter too. "
Chan was yelling instructions. Nursing Staff were everywhere.
He watched his son being pushed into the corner of the room as they attempted desperately to resuscitate her.
He remembered how it felt being pushed into the corner of the birthing suite by Lucy's Doctor.
He watched as Alan covered his distraught face and began to cry like a lost child.
He remembered how it felt covering his own distraught face. He'd cried too.
He listened as Chan commanded.
"Get her into theatre now. I've got to get this baby out!"
"Get her into theatre now. I've only got to get this baby out!"
Jeff Tracy felt the world around him spin as he continued to restrain Kyrano. Almost the exact words the surgeon in Boston had uttered with Lucy. It was as if he was destined to relive the same nightmare he'd experienced twenty-one years before through the son he had lived it for.
But it was not the same nightmare. This nightmare was worse.
Lucille Tracy had been breathing when her surgeon uttered those words.
Tinarda Tracy was not.
The lights of Tracy Island had long fallen into the distance as Thunderbird One headed towards San Diego for the second time in less than five hours.
This time the sleek silver craft had on board its own unique type of "rescue equipment". This equipment was developed without the need for mathematical formulas, it worked better than any other equipment in International Rescue and it got the job done brilliantly each and every time. And it was needed right now in San Diego.
Josephine Tracy was on her way to San Diego.
The seventy-five year old woman who held the Tracy family together in times of crisis sat next to her Grandson with her hands folded in her lap and her eyes everywhere. She wasn't saying a word. The Grandson at the controls frowned. Grandma only sat in silence if she was doing one of two things, worrying or thinking about something that was worrying her.
"Grandma." he said. "Are you doing OK?"
Josie Tracy looked at her eldest Grandson. He looked tired and strained. Why he'd insisted on walking straight off that rocket ship and into Thunderbird One to bring her to San Diego was beyond her. Virgil had been ordered to do it. But the moment Thunderbird Three landed orders changed. The eldest Tracy son gave new orders. He placed himself in charge of flying his Grandmother to the hospital.
He had barked at Gordon that there was good reason for it. Josie Tracy was worried about what that reason was.
"Grandma?" he enquired again.
"Yes thank you Scott. I'm fine." she finally replied.
She continued to sit in silence.
"Grandma." Scott said hesitantly. "You're really worried about all this aren't you?"
Josie looked guarded.
"What makes you say that?" she asked carefully. Scott often asked her leading questions and she didn't want to say much right now. Not while she was trying to gather her inner strength and put her head in order. This family needed it right now.
She had been crying about the situation like a silly old lady an hour ago but quickly realised she needed to stop that nonsense and pull herself together. The Tracy family was facing tragedy again and crying about it wasn't going to change that fact. Action not tears was needed in a crisis and action was what she intended to take. Exactly what action she wasn't sure. She'd have to wait until she got to San Diego to see what was needed.
Of course she was worried. Why wouldn't she be? Cryptic messages from San Diego; one minute saying Tin-Tin was being stabilised before operating, the next minute saying they couldn't stabilise her without operating. One minute Thunderbird Three was bringing her Grandson home, the next his brothers were taking him directly to San Diego at some suicidal speed and tossing him out hoping his parachute would open. Hardly the way she'd wanted the Father of her great grandchild to be handled. If all that wasn't bad enough, none of them had heard a word from the hospital for over an hour. The whole thing was enough to worry anyone wasn't it? Well wasn't it?
Scott looked directly at her.
"I only remember you acting like this one other time Grandma."
"When pray tell was that?"
Scott's eyes scanned the controls. He was sorry he had brought it up.
"Come on." she said when he failed to reply. "Out with it then. Maybe I can remember what I did to face up to things. "
"Grandma; you sat in silence like this the night you took us to say goodbye to Mom."
Josie's frown deepened. He was right. Josie knew she'd had exactly the same feelings in her stomach back then as she had now and it had taken every last bit of inner strength she had to cope with it. But the Grandson beside her had only been eight years old at the time, a month short of his ninth birthday. Had he really picked up on her that much? Well no point in denying it she supposed.
"You have a very good memory Scott." she replied. "I do feel the same way now as I did back then."
"Grandma. I'll never forget you that night." he said quietly. "And it concerns me very much if you feel this way again."
"Hence the reason for all the barking and carrying on you did back at the base about bringing me in yourself?" she enquired.
"Yes ma'am." was his curt reply. "I needed to know how you felt about this but above all make sure you were all right."
"Of course I'm all right Sweetie." she assured him.
"Grandma I don't think you are." he said looking straight ahead. He knew how much she wanted this baby.
"Well you're entitled to your opinion I suppose. It's wrong of course." Josie replied.
The tone of her voice indicated to Scott to drop the subject and she knew he knew better than to argue with her.
The two of them fell silent; each with their own thoughts of that night in Boston after the call had come to 550 Paramount Circuit with news that would change the life of the Tracy family forever.
Scott's thoughts engrossed him.
Grandma had woken him by turning on the light in the bedroom. He had stirred but remained in the state of slumber all tired little boys found themselves in at ten thirty in the evening. He remembered her shaking him and saying earnestly.
"Scott. Quickly Sweetie. Grandma needs you to get up for her. Hurry along now."
He had opened his eyes and looked at her sleepily.
"What Grandma?" he had said.
"Sweetie, I need you to wake Virgil and Johnny. I have to get the baby organised. There's no time to waste."
"Why Grandma?" he had asked.
"Just wake your little brothers for me sweetie. Please. It's important. Do you know where their coats and shoes are?"
He had been fully awake by then.
"Yes ma'am I know." he had said.
"Quickly then make sure they have them on. There's a good boy."
He had obeyed instantly. His Father had spoken to him that morning as he and his mother had left for the hospital and told him that he had to help Grandma with his brothers. He knew if his Father heard otherwise he'd be displeased. He had woken Virgil who'd swung a punch for disturbing him. He had woken John who immediately started crying and calling for "mommy." He had taken John to the bathroom. He suggested to Virgil that he should go there too. Virgil had swung another punch at him but ended up taking his advice. He had gone to the cupboards and found their coats and shoes. He had helped them put them on.
Grandma then told him to take his brothers to the car. He had noticed then there was something about the way she was behaving that made him worry.
"Where are we going Grandma?" he had asked.
"Quickly sweetie, there's no time to talk, "she had said as she pulled open the refrigerator and took out a bottle for Gordon "Grandma will tell you in a bit."
He remembered Gordon grizzling and rubbing his eyes as she carried him to the car. She had strapped him in his baby seat. She turned to him and handed him the bottle.
"Here Scott; give this to your little brother. I need to get going immediately."
He had looked at Gordon and offered the bottle. The milk was cold and he knew Gordon wouldn't take it. He never did if it was cold.
"Grandma." he said. "Gordie doesn't like cold milk. Mommy always warms it up for him."
"Sweetie he'll have to make do I'm afraid. Grandma hasn't got time to warm it up for him this time." she said as she climbed into the car and started the engine.
"Why Grandma? " he had asked again. She did not reply.
They had backed out of the driveway. Grandma remained silent. They had driven down Paramount Road, past the shopping centre and past his school. Grandma appeared to driving very fast and still wasn't saying a word. She had a very worried look on her face.
They drove past his Father's Offices.
"Please Grandma where are we going?" he had asked.
Still she said nothing. Scott remembered it was that point he really started to worry.
"We are going to the hospital little one." she had finally said.
"Why are we going in the middle of the night Grandma?" Virgil had asked from the front seat.
That stony silence of his Grandma's had continued.
"Daddy called." she 'd swallowed as they stopped at the traffic lights.
"Yes ma'am?" he had replied.
"Daddy thinks there's something wrong with Mommy." she had swallowed.
He remembered how frightened he had felt when she said that.
"What's wrong with Mommy?" he had asked, immediately starting to panic.
"Well... Daddy said he thinks she might be going to heaven."
He'd thought about that for a bit and then frowned. He decided Grandma had gotten it all wrong. She was scaring him like this for nothing.
"No. Mommy is just having another baby. Only sick people go to heaven Grandma."
Grandma hadn't said another word all the way to the hospital.
And he knew damned well what had happened after they got to the hospital.
Grandma wasn't saying anything now either. Grandma had a sixth sense. Scott Tracy started to worry about what was going to happen at San Diego Hospital. If she was worried then he had good reason to be worried too. And he was also worried about her. This great grand-child was everything to her.
Josie Tracy's thoughts occupied her.
He had to have got it wrong she'd decided after she'd put down the telephone. Surely Lucille was not that knocked around after the birth even if it had resulted in an emergency caesarean. But he was pretty cut up she had to admit and he wanted his sons brought to the hospital in one hell of a hurry.
She had gone and woken Scott. He was an obedient child and didn't mind being responsible for his brothers. She'd instructed him to find their coats and get their shoes on their feet. She heard him take John to the bathroom. Not many eight year olds would have anticipated that she remembered thinking. So responsible just like his Daddy.
The baby was hard. He'd been unhappy ever since his mother had left that morning and she didn't feel inclined to wake him. She had to change him and pack a bag. She had to heat his bottle. She knew it would take half an hour to get to the hospital even at ten thirty in the evening. There was no time to do much for the baby at all. She'd lifted him from his cot still asleep and quickly changed him as he stirred. She'd snatched a bag of some sort that Lucille kept under the cot. It looked like it contained diapers and a few rattles. She'd grabbed his bottle cold from the refrigerator. She'd strapped them all in the car.
She'd tried to avoid talking to the children at all costs. If Jeff was right and he simply couldn't be, telling them their mother was dying was not something she cared to do. These little boys had been raised in a close no-nonsense young family. They had been showered with love by their mother. Their Father idolised all four of them. Their family was struggling with money at the moment with all their working capital tied up and millions of dollars doing nothing. The business was buckling as the result of it. Another baby had just been birthed. This close no-nonsense young family headed by her son was being stretched to the limit as it was without losing its mother.
She began to really worry. She worried what would happen if Lucy did die. She was still very young and in the prime of her life. She worried how about Jeff would cope with that. He adored her. She worried how Lucy would cope seeing her children for the last time. She adored them. She worried how Jeff would cope with the children. She worried how the children themselves would cope.
She'd finally had to find the courage to say something to those precious little boys of her sons. She was as careful as she could be. Scott had not believed her. She didn't want to be believed herself.
But it had all been true and she'd had good reason for all her worries.
And she had good reason for her worries now too.
Josie Tracy swallowed and listened to the engines of Thunderbird One. She worried what would happen if Tin-Tin died. Tin-Tin was only twenty-two years old and her life had only just begun. She worried how Alan would cope with that. She knew he wouldn't. He had adored her for as many years as his Father had adored his mother. Longer.
She worried how Kyrano would cope losing his daughter. He wouldn't. She was his only child. She worried how Jeff would cope with the anger of his son especially if overwork for International Rescue ended up being identified as part of the cause.
She worried about how everyone else would cope with losing Tin-Tin. Every last one of them would feel it.
Most of all she worried about how she was going to cope herself.
"If I lose that little girl who's been so dear to my heart for the past twelve years or that little baby that I've been longing for…" she thought "…this old Grandma might just about be spent with this life herself."
"And so will my Grandson." she panicked. Josie Tracy feared what Alan would do to himself if he was left alone with a baby.
She wiped her eyes wearily.
"How much further is it now Scott?" she asked. "I've a bad feeling I need to be there right this minute."
"I'll be bringing her down soon Grandma." he replied. "Gordon's arranged a car to take you to the front door ma'am. I'll have to be taking off immediately I'm sorry."
She patted his arm.
"Thank you sweetie." she said tenderly. "I appreciate you thinking of how I'd be feeling and bringing in me yourself. It's been a rough few hours for all of us."
"It's OK Grandma. I know Alan will be very pleased to see you. "
San Diego had come into view. The morning sun appeared on the horizon. The rays reflected off the silver edge of Thunderbird One. A new day had dawned.
It was now November 29th. Scott swallowed hard at the realisation of it.
"Grandma." he hesitated. "Do you know what today is?
"No I can't say as I do sweetie." she replied. "Should I know?"
"Ma'am I've just realised its November 29."
Josie swallowed. November 29 had been a happy day in the Tracy house many years ago. A special day everyone in the family looked forward to celebrating. But for the past twenty-one years it had only been a day of sad reflection.
Today was not a good day for another tragedy to occur in the Tracy family.
Today would have been Lucille Tracy's fifty-fifth birthday.
He didn't know what to say. He opened his mouth.
"Alan." was all that came out.
Jeff Tracy stood behind his youngest son. Alan was looking out the window at the morning sky. He did not reply.
"Son." he said placing a supportive hand on his shoulder. "We just have to trust Doctor Chan."
Alan still did not reply.
"He's the best in the business son." he continued. "If anyone can save her he will."
No reply.
"Alan…For what it's worth I know how you feel.'
Nothing.
Jeff Tracy had never experienced such difficulty in expressing himself. He usually expressed himself easily and in no uncertain terms with this fifth son and this son never had any qualms in expressing himself in return. This was the wild son. The thoughtless and self-centred son; the argumentative, insensitive and egotistical son; the son who was incapable of thinking of anyone but himself.
But he had just heard the moving words of that very son as he poured out his heart and inner soul to the girl he had loved for twelve years. There had not been anything wild, thoughtless, self-centred, argumentative, insensitive or egotistical about it. It had come from his heart and his Father had been stunned.
Jeff Tracy had not really understood the intensity and depth of this son's feelings for Tin-Tin Kyrano until now. He had been told about them by everyone but he had never truly believed it.
He had never thought his youngest son was capable of loving anyone. A different girl every night he'd been told. He'd often wondered where he'd gone wrong with this son. Not so long ago he was completely off the rails.
After hearing him talk to Tin-Tin with such honesty and feeling, Jeff knew his son was very much back on the rails and she had somehow put him there. He hadn't realised it before now.
Originally to him what had happened with Tin-Tin had been no different to what he had been like in college. He thought and feared his son would tire of her. He had expected the marriage to end within a year…a casualty of his son's untameable selfishness and insatiable roving eye. Alan had proven him wrong. This marriage he had made with Tin-Tin Kyrano appeared to be as strong as the marriage he had shared with Lucille Evans.
Until now he had thought he was the only man who could ever have loved a woman so completely. Alan had proven him wrong there too he had to confess. The things his son had said he would never have been able to say to Lucy. He would never have admitted letting her down even though there were times when he knew he did. He would never have admitted weakness of any kind.
He had gone to that room to tell Alan he had to reconsider his decision. He had ended up standing in the doorway totally dumbstruck as he listened to his son. He was dumbstruck now as he tried to find some words to comfort him.
"Alan. I..." he began but no words came out again.
"Sir." he said and his whole voice shook with grief. "Leave me alone."
"Son…"
"Dad leave it." he rumbled. "Please see to Kyrano if you must see to anyone."
"Alan my place is with you."
Alan Tracy took a sharp intake of breath and resolutely lifted his chin. He was beginning to burn.
So his Father's place was with him was it? Since when? Since when had his feelings about all this counted?
His own place had been with Tin-Tin but that hadn't been important had it?
He was the Astronaut on rotation. He had to fulfil his duty to International Rescue no matter what or where his place was meant to be. He could not mix his career with his personal life. Those were the Organisation's rules and they couldn't be changed.
Not even for her. Not even once.
Tin-Tin's place had been to rest, take care of their baby and herself in his absence but that hadn't been important either. She was the Assistant Engineer. She had to fulfil her duty to International Rescue no matter what. She could not mix her career with her personal life. Those were the Organisation's rules and they couldn't change for her either.
Not even for their baby.
And now she was in theatre fighting for her life. Alan swallowed. They'd started her heart again. They'd detected a faint heartbeat from the baby. They'd rushed his wife from the room, leaving him here alone. Alone to reflect on how this all came to be in the first place.
Now he wanted some answers.
This could all have been avoided if he had been there. He would have noticed something was wrong and done something about it. He would have made her stand down despite her insistence to finish the allocated job. He would have made her break the rules. He would have ensured she met her Doctor's appointment no matter what mandatory rest periods were in place. He would have broken the rules and flown her to San Diego himself.
The rules had been broken before when it suited the needs of International Rescue. Mandatory rest periods had been ignored before. They could have been ignored again.
But he wasn't able to do anything. He had another job to do. A job his Father had said was more important… his required rotation in Thunderbird Five.
To do things that were needed to keep their baby safe they both needed to mix their careers with their personal lives…and break the rules.
Break the unbreakable rules of International Rescue. His Father's rules.
He'd had it up to here with his Father's rules and International Rescue.
Needing someone or something to blame for the pain and grief he was feeling, exhaustion from nearly four weeks of sleepless nights in Thunderbird Five, the stress and guilt of worrying about Tin-Tin being alone, the tension and altercation with his brothers in Thunderbird Three, the trauma he was experiencing now had pushed him to his limit.
He didn't want to talk to his Father. He wanted to be left alone; left alone to make sense of all of this in his head; left alone to find answers to his questions.
Just one more patronising word from his Father…just one he swore…
"Alan…"
That was the word.
Silently Alan Tracy turned from the window. Jeff Tracy saw only one thing as his youngest son stood up to his full height and faced him.
The eyes of Grant Tracy.
Eyes flashing with a frightful temper only his Father had possessed. Alan Tracy possessed that temper too. Worse.
"Don't say anything further to me Dad." he said menacingly. "You and your rules have done enough damage to my family right now. I swear if you push me any more I'll forget you are my Father."
Chan: "Pressure?"
Kingsley: "Stable."
Chan: "Thank goodness."
Kingsley: "Could be a small Haemorrhage there though."
Chan: "That's the least of my worries at the moment Kingsley."
Kingsley: "Chan it worries me."
Chan: "Yes of course. Eclampsia…some most unfortunate complications."
Sommerville: "I'm surprised you're taking this vertical Chan."
Chan: "It's quicker."
Sommerville: "That's not common practice these days."
Chan: "Sommerville. This is not a common C-section. I'm going vertical. It's quicker."
Sommerville: "That heartbeat's not good Doctor."
Kingsley: "We're lucky we've got one at all Doctor."
Chan: "Steady gentlemen. We are all aware of the urgency here. I'll have the baby for you in a minute. I have to drain this."
Kingsley: "Pressure rising Chan."
Chan: "Come on young lady. Hang in there for me."
Kingsley: "Doctor. This isn't good."
Chan: "She's still with us gentlemen. "
Kingsley: "How much more fluid can there be around that baby?"
Chan: "With Eclampsia it's hard to say. "
Sommerville: "That's a hell of lot of fluid Chan."
Chan: "It's taking far too long to drain I'm afraid."
Sommerville: "Chan I need that baby."
Chan: "Don't push me Sommerville. There is still scope to preserve the girl if I'm careful with this."
Kingsley: "The direction was to prioritise the child."
Sommerville: "Chan he's right."
Chan: "Patience gentlemen. The girl is extremely young…and there is a young fellow outside."
Kingsley: "Chan. Prioritise the baby."
Chan: "The child is being prioritised Doctor. I don't do vertical incisions unless there's a priority. Now I should now be able to find you a baby Sommerville if I cut here."
Sommerville: "Chan I haven't seen it done that way for ages."
Chan: "No you haven't."
Kingsley: "You certainly know your stuff Doctor."
Chan: "Here's your baby Sommerville. A girl. Extremities rather blue."
Sommerville: "Not very big for a full-term baby Kingsley. Suction…"
Kingsley: "A result of a rough ride these past few days I imagine."
Sommerville: "Come on little girl. Breathe for me."
Kingsley: "Record the time of birth as 5.39am."
Sommerville: "Breathe! Get me some more suction over here will you."
Kingsley: "Can we get that suction over here!"
Sommerville: "Come on damn it. Come on."
Kingsley: "That's a Tracy baby Sommerville."
Sommerville: "I'm well aware of that Kingsley!"
Kingsley: "Well get her to breathe for God's sake."
Chan: "Gentlemen please."
Kingsley: "Sommerville!"
Sommerville: "Come on now. This world's a good place to be little lady. How much more fluid can you have down there."
Chan: "Sommerville? You got that baby to breathe yet?"
Sommerville: "Get me the damned oxygen."
Kingsley: "Christ Sommerville what are you doing?"
Chan: " Sommerville?"
Sommerville: "Thank God."
Kingsley: "How's that for music to your ears?"
Chan: "Doubtful."
Sommerville. "She's having real trouble. Get her on the respirator."
Chan: "You travelling all right there Doctor?"
Kingsley: "Pressure stable."
Chan: "Internal organs seem OK."
Kingsley: "Amazing technique Doctor."
Chan: "Sometimes old techniques work well Kingsley. It helps if you've been around a while."
Kingsley: "Heart rate erratic. BP 180."
Chan: "Another seizure Kingsley. Be ready to resuscitate."
Kingsley: "BP 190."
Chan: "Get that on her now!"
Sommerville: "Come on little girl. I don't want to lose you now."
Chan: "Come on Mrs.Tracy. I don't want to lose you now."
Kingsley: "Ride it out young lady. You've got a baby to live for now."
Kingsley: "BP 180."
Sommerville: "Colour's better. Blue didn't suit you little girl.""
Chan: "Heart rate slowing down?"
Kingsley: "Yes Doctor. BP 170."
Chan: "I'll commence to close."
Sommerville: "Neonate stable under respiration. I am authorising transfer to the special care unit. Condition; critical."
Kingsley: "Now to stabilise Mrs. Tracy."
Chan: "Kingsley. We've got a long way to go if you're talking about stabilisation. This young lady is not out of the woods yet by a long way."
"So this is where the two of you are then!"
Jeff Tracy and Kyrano both raised their heads to the sound of the familiar voice who had been escorted down the corridor by the sister in charge. Josie Tracy looked at their tired, strained features. Kyrano's eyes showed nothing but devastation and grief. They told her nothing and made her fear the worst. Her son's eyes told her everything. She had been reading them for over fifty-six years.
The worried eyes said there was still no news. The distressed eyes said what news they had was not good. The grieving eyes told her he had Lucy uppermost in his mind at that moment. The guarded eyes said something had transpired between him and Alan. Why didn't that surprise her! The relieved eyes said he was mighty glad to see her.
Josie steeled herself and fixed her own eyes on them both.
"Gracious me look at the two of you. You both look dreadful. Don't either of you know how to use a coffee machine?"
Jeff rose from his seat. He pulled her into a hug that gave her more than enough information on how he was feeling.
"Mom! What are you doing here?" he exclaimed surprised.
Lord knows she needed a hug from him right now too but she had more important things on her mind. Of prime importance; the condition of her great grandchild.
"Hmmph…I'm not surprised you'd want to know that Jeff. I wouldn't be here at all if you had anything to do with it."
"Yes those were my orders Mom." he said quietly. "Which I see you've seen fit to ignore yet again."
"You know I only ignore you Jeff when I know you're wrong. Even that red-haired son of yours knew you were wrong and saw the sense in me coming. He ordered for me to be brought in."
"Gordon?" Jeff Tracy asked incredulously.
"Yes Gordon and by the look of you two, thank goodness he did. Jeff, this is a family matter and I've been the Grandmother of this family as well as the mother for too long a time to be sitting at home because you think I can't deal with things."
She surveyed him carefully.
"Son, if you want my opinion, you're the one who should have been left at home, not me. You don't appear to be dealing too well with anything at the moment. Now tell me what is going on with Tin-Tin and my great grandchild, and I want to know everything."
"Mom. The situation is not good I'm afraid."
"Well that doesn't tell me anything Jeff does it?"
He proceeded to fill Josie Tracy in on Alan's decision to prioritise his child.
"And" she said eyeing him. "no doubt with the way you feel about what happened to Lucille you wouldn't have been too keen to agree with his decision."
"No I Mom I don't agree with it but I never got the opportunity to say anything."
She sniffed. "Just as well you didn't then by the sound of it. This is a new lesson you've got to learn Jeff; learning your place when it comes to the family affairs of your son. You've no business interjecting at a time like this or any other time for that matter."
If he didn't feel so worried and strained he would have pointed out she needed to have a good look at herself. She needed to learn her place in matters to do with his family; something she had totally lost sight of in the past nine months.
"Mother I don't agree. Alan is far too young to be making choices like that."
"Young or old; you have to understand it's no business of yours. What he decides is best for his family is best. He knows Tin-Tin better than you do and you have to respect that. I'm telling you now Jeff, if you aren't prepared to support my Grandson in his decision on this occasion, don't say anything. Especially in my hearing."
Jeff felt frustrated already and she'd only been there two minutes.
Alan Tracy had heard his Grandmother's distinctive, southern, no-nonsense voice and was pleased to hear that she had arrived. He went to walk into the waiting room to embrace her but on hearing the subject of her discussion with his Father was him, he paused momentarily at the door.
"Mom I didn't say anything about Alan's decision."
"Well that's a blessing." she replied and fell silent. However she knew there was something else and she wanted to know what it was. She folded her arms and looked at him directly.
"So that look in your eyes is telling me you've had words with your son over something else then is it?"
Jeff looked at her amazed. How did she pick that up? She always knew everything and it really un-nerved him.
"Yes Mom." he admitted quietly looking around him. "Alan's blaming the Organisation's rules for what's happened to Tin-Tin."
She rolled her eyes at him and exclaimed.
"Organisation's Rules? Your rules you mean Jeff!"
She knew his tunnel vision over Alan and Tin-Tin keeping their work and personal lives separate would get him into trouble eventually.
He glanced at Kyrano. "Please Mom if you want to discuss this, I'd rather talk about it privately."
Josie also looked at Kyrano. The poor man was so grief-stricken he hadn't even acknowledged her. He probably wouldn't hear a thing anyway but yes; the need for privacy was paramount. Especially with what she had to say to this son of hers if he was going to bring up the subject of rules at a time like this.
"Very well then."
They moved out of Kyrano's earshot but very much into the hearing of an emotional Alan Tracy. Josie turned and began to speak directly.
"You can't blame that son of yours for holding the rules accountable for all this. You also can't blame him for looking for answers. You and I both know ourselves that we've been fooling about these past few days thinking things with that little girl have been all right when it should have been obvious to each and every one of us on that island that they weren't."
She held up her finger at him to silence him as he opened his mouth to speak.
"Now I know it's not your fault that she's a determined young lady but Brains told me before I left earlier that the child has been working until all hours of the night these past few days. Working with swollen fingers and blinding headaches. Not eating or resting properly. She was doing that for you Jeff. It was your place to stop her, not push her harder for a result. You owed that to her and you owed it to your son. Lord I'm starting to think I've lost my sixth sense in looking out for the well-being of this family by having that happen right under my nose. "
"Mom at the moment we need to focus on what's happening, not how it happened. She's in theatre now and none of us know if she or the baby will survive the surgery. I'm worried senseless about this and after what happened to Lucy I'm sure you can't blame me. I don't seem to be able to put the situation in perspective at the moment and that's very unlike me."
Josie frowned. Well if he wanted to put things in perspective he should have thought about it earlier when she pointed out well over a month ago that Alan should have been at home and not up in Thunderbird Five.
Alan's temper was rising. So this was why she had been looking so tired and drawn. His Father was pushing his Assistant Engineer to perform. He pressed his lips together and continued to simmer.
"Jeff I'd be more than worried senseless if I were you. I've checked out this Pre-Eclampsia thing. Stressful situations make it worse. " Josie said bluntly. Her tone caused him to become defensive.
"I didn't cause it Mom. It's not fair of you to blame me."
"No most likely you didn't cause it but even you have to admit that working to your deadlines is about as stressful as it gets even without a baby in the making. If Alan finds out about his wife working past her capability for what I only see as a stupid piece of drilling equipment and his Father did nothing about it ;you'll hear it from him all right...loud and clear."
Alan's face reddened as his Grandmother's words echoed in his head. "Stressful situations only make it worse." So this is what his Father had been subjecting her to in his absence.
His inflexible deadlines and all the expectation that went with them.
She would have been stressed all right. They'd both been stressed trying to juggle marriage and International Rescue obligations for almost seven months in an attempt to keep them separate. Oh yes Alan had sat by many times silently watching her trying to meet his Father's deadlines, not able to say a thing.
"I gave Tin-Tin the option of standing down Mom; many times."
"No you didn't. You might have hinted at it Jeff but you never sat her down and gave her any options."
"The hints were my options Mother. "he said guardedly "Options I'm sorry to say she absolutely refused to consider. I was sure if she didn't feel she was up to the deadline I set she would have stepped aside and let Brains complete the design."
"Jeff listen to yourself!" Josie snapped, "You know damned well that little girl would have never stepped aside for fear of letting you down. It was your place to order her to do so. To hell with that damned piece of rescue equipment and anyone else's life. Your own daughter-in-law's life was at risk, not to mention your grandchild's. And now look what's happened as a result. Surely that's got to be playing on your conscience at the moment."
"Mom. I don't want to talk about it now. I told you. I'm trying to put this in perspective."
"No I'm sure you don't want to talk about it but you'll have to if Tin-Tin or that baby dies won't you? And you won't only be talking about it to me." Josie flashed. "You'll be talking to that Father of hers and trying to justify yourself. Not to mention explaining to your youngest son that because you wanted things done for International Rescue he doesn't have a wife anymore or his child doesn't have a mother."
"Mom please. I'm having trouble enough dealing with this situation without you making it sound ten times worse than it is."
She shook her head. How could the situation get worse than it was?
"Where is my Grandson?" she demanded. "I want to talk to him."
Alan Tracy stepped from the corridor into the full view of his Grandmother and Father. His eyes never left his Father's face. He was almost purple with fury.
"Your Grandson is here." he spat through clenched teeth. 'And I want to talk to my Father ...now."
Josie Tracy paled as she looked the features of her youngest Grandson;the features of Grant Tracy. It was obvious he had heard the whole thing. She watched helplessly as he stared his Father down, Grant's resolute chin and flashing eyes fixed in a gaze she could only describe as frightening. The silence was similar to the calm before a tropical storm on the island. But the storm was gathering. Nothing was more certain than that.
"Explain what you have been asking my wife to do for you Dad" he said icily. "Because I mustn't have heard you and Grandma right just now."
"Son…" he began. "I tried to get Tin-Tin to stand down until after the child is born and she refused. You know she's headstrong when it comes to her work and I wasn't prepared to force her do something she didn't want to do."
Alan bit his lips to remain in control but it was fast losing the battle. Headstrong? In his mind, the truth of it was Tin-Tin was terrified; terrified of failing in her role as his Assistant Engineer because she was pregnant.
"Why didn't you tell me you wanted her to stand down then Dad?" he snarled. "I would have got her to see the sense in it for you. "
"Because where work is concerned she answers directly to me son. Those are the rules of the Organisation."
That word again. That word whose real meaning had become hell on earth for him and for Tin-Tin. "The Organisation."
Alan Tracy lunged forward and grasped his Father by the collar. Jeff Tracy swallowed as he looked at his youngest son for the first time as a man. An angry man.
"She's my wife Dad not your bloody Assistant Engineer and as far as I'm concerned she answers to me when she's got my child inside her. That includes her work. How dare you do this to me! How dare you think you can treat Tin-Tin like some mere employee who doesn't count for anything?"
Josie Tracy tried to intervene. She put her hand on his arm and tried to separate him from his Father.
"Sweetie for goodness sake calm down. You're tired and worried and I don't blame you but carrying on like this isn't helping things for that little girl." she pleaded.
"Grandma save it! "he snapped furiously. "I know this isn't your fault and without you I probably wouldn't have Tin-Tin and the baby now. But this damned stinking issue of rules is between my Father and me…"
"Alan please settle down. Please sweetie .. for me." she implored. "I know it seems that your Father wasn't being sympathetic to her condition but that's not right. Give him a chance to explain."
Alan released his Father's collar and stood back to look at him.
"All right Sir. You heard Grandma. Explain to me right now why my wife worked with headaches and swollen fingers until all hours of the night. Why she didn't confide in me that she wasn't feeling well. Were you being sympathetic Sir?"
Jeff Tracy did not reply. He would not tell Alan about the reason for the deadline. It was between him and Tin-Tin.
"You won't tell me Dad? Well Dad let me tell you then. You blamed my wife for what happened to those two kids in that mine didn't you? And no Sir… she didn't tell me. She wouldn't be brave enough to go against your instructions. I've figured it out for myself. In ten bloody seconds I can read you Dad. International Rescue failed and you needed to blame someone and she was the one doing the calculations."
"No Alan…" he stammered. "Please listen …"
Josie stared at her son with incredulity. Surely Alan was wrong. Her son would never have placed such a huge emotional burden on that poor little girl no matter what he was trying to get her to do.
"Say something Jeff." she thought. "Deny it for goodness sake."
"I'm listening Sir. Deny it. Tell me I'm wrong."
A deafening silence followed.
Finally his Father spoke.
"What I have discussed with my Assistant Engineer is confidential Alan." he said. "However the message I gave to Tin-Tin was clearly to stand down because she wasn't up to it."
Alan turned away. Tin-Tin had told him he had to learn to deal with his anger in ways other than losing his temper. Well now was the time to prove to her he had the capability to do it. He swallowed and without looking at his Father said in a low but deadly calm voice.
"Very well Sir I'll accept that if that is the way you want this to be. However it is now time I did something to get rid of the problem my marriage has caused you and the ranks of International Rescue. Therefore, if by some chance Tin-Tin makes it, I have decided to take her and hopefully our baby and leave Tracy Island for good. Your worries about your Astronaut and Assistant Engineer falling out with each other and letting you down or fraternising on duty will effectively be solved. The only problem will be Sir that you will no longer have me as your Astronaut and I will not allow Tin-Tin to be your Assistant Engineer."
Josie's eyes filled with tears.
"No sweetie. " she whispered. "You can't be meaning that. Your Father loves you both very much. This is all simply a misunderstanding."
Alan continued to speak as calmly as he could.
"No Grandma it is not a misunderstanding. You heard me ask him the question about my wife. You heard him answer the question as if only his Assistant Engineer was involved. That is the way it is. We understand each other perfectly.
"Alan…" she implored. "Please stop and think about what it is you're saying."
"I am thinking about it and I mean it. What's more ma'am; if my wife dies, I will still be taking my baby and leaving this place. I don't know how to change a diaper or the first thing about how to raise a baby but I can learn and I assure you I will. I can provide for my baby without your help Dad. I still have my name in the racing business and I'll get by. I know it's never been an adequate career in your eyes and I realise it's not an ideal environment for a baby but it's no worse than being prioritised behind a drill the way I figure it."
That was enough for Josie. Jeff hadn't been listening. Now Alan wasn't listening either. Well it was time for a reality check for this young man grieving or not. She grasped his arm.
"Now you listen here to me Alan Tracy. You aren't going anywhere and saying you are without giving any thought to the matter is not only mule-headed and typically you but down right ridiculous. Taking a baby car racing! That shows in itself you're not thinking straight. You're exhausted from your rotation, emotionally spent, past reason and past listening. Now in behind those doors at the end of that corridor is a little girl you love very much and one you've loved for a long time and one I've made sure you got the chance to make good lovin' with. You've got no business deciding that young lady's future without talking to her first or to me for that matter. And also in behind those doors is my great grandchild. You've got no place choosing that child's future while you're in this state either. Now you settle down young man right this minute."
She eyed her own son.
"And you settle down too. I'm mighty unhappy at you at the moment Jeff Tracy if what your son has been saying is true."
A commotion at the end of the corridor caused them all to be distracted.
Doctor Sommerville had left theatre and was headed in the direction of the special care nursery.
Behind him was the incubator containing Lucy Josephine Tracy.
Sommerville was issuing instructions to the nursing staff accompanying him. The respirator was being adjusted as they spoke.
Alan's eyes filled with tears of relief when he saw the incubator.
"Grandma." he breathed. "They've managed to get the baby out alive."
"Thank God" Josie breathed as her Grandson strode up the passageway towards the special care nursery.
As he walked he looked towards the theatre doors hoping Doctor Chan or Doctor Kingsley would appear. There was no sign of either of them.
It was obvious the surgery continued.
KINGSLEY: No pulse.
CHAN : Come on Mrs.Tracy. She's a beautiful baby.
KINGSLEY : Still no pulse.
CHAN : Stand clear.
KINGSLEY : Nothing Doctor.
CHAN : Stand clear.
KINGSLEY : Doctor?
CHAN : Kingsley. I've done all I can.
KINGSLEY: No Chan. Not yet.
CHAN : Kingsley. Enough now.
KINGSLEY : I'm asking you Doctor.
CHAN : Stand clear.
CHAPTER 12 - A NEW COMMITMENT - MEETING LUCY JOSEPHINE
