Author's Notes: Hey thanks for all the reviews! I hope you slash haters still give this story a chance, if not, at least my other story (I think it's better written but that's just me)
Individual notes are at the bottom of the chapter, oh yeah, and the ambiguity about Adam's secret (that many of you seem to already know, argh) is that way on purpose to draw out suspense ^^
Disclaimer: The disclaimer of the first chapter will be a standing one from now on so that I won't have to rewrite this every time.
~*On Love, In Sadness*~
~*Chapter Two*~
Adam's POV
I leaned my head back and smelled the freshly laundered sheets. I was in so deep and I didn't even realize it was happening until it was too late. Damn Riley. Damn Rick Riley to hell.
"Damn him." It felt even better saying it out loud as well as knowing that Father Pat would be shocked, not that I cared that much or anything. I liked Father Pat though, back at home. He was a good guy; it was church and the religion I hated. I couldn't help but feel like I was praying out of habit and everything seemed wrong. It was like God and heaven were all just a children's bedtime story people made up to comfort themselves so that they wouldn't have to deal with the fact that we'll all be blasted into nonexistence once we die.
Damn my existential tendencies.
I should have known Riley would do something like this. He was slimy and smart enough to, which pissed me off even more. I pulled out my journal and flipped through the pages filled with my sometimes messy, sometimes immaculate handwriting. That was another thing that bugged me, how I couldn't be consistent. How is it that I didn't just have one personality and instead am harboring five? One is the depressed teenager with precocious, angsty tendencies, another is cheerful, happy, friendly, and another is deadpan…the list goes on.
The words "Rick Riley" jumped out of the page at my face and I started reading. It dated to when I first learned I was put on Varsity, possibly the worst thing Orion could have done to me. The goalie, Scooter, is pretty nice although I can already tell he has something for Julie. Sometimes when he talks to me I wonder if it's because of my connections to her or if it's because he really wants to be my friend. He's a good guy though, I guess I wouldn't mind either way, it's nice to have at least one friend on Varsity. The captain…Riley…. he's nice, and really talented. But…I don't know, there's something about him that slightly bothers me. Maybe it's because I'm really intimidated.
I wanted to shout at myself, tell myself what to do before things got messed up. The accounts of Riley got worse and worse and I ended up closing my journal before reaching what I knew was coming and what I didn't want to read. I already knew the story; I know what happened because goddammit, I lived it.
Who knew fantastic, nice, talented Riley could turn out to be who he really was? Did anyone else know? Sometimes I felt like Scooter knew. Sometimes I think about telling someone, like Charlie. Charlie would tell me it's okay, that it's not my fault. Yeah, right, maybe in my dreams. I can't tell him because then it'd mean telling him…whatever, it doesn't even matter, I can't tell Charlie.
Just like my thoughts suddenly solidified, Charlie poked his head into my room.
"What are you up to?" he asked. He was completely innocent, as though the past weeks have been erased. If it were anyone but Charlie it would have irritated me to no end. But it was Charlie and I didn't care, I wanted to leave all that fighting behind too. Remembering the unofficial JV-Varsity match almost made me throw up. Obviously Charlie noticed my discomfort.
"Or if you want I could just leave," he said, with a confused expression.
"No, no, stay. I just…I was thinking about that JV-Varsity match." Charlie's sheepish expression showed he didn't like the memories much either.
"I was a real animal, I'm sorry," he said. He sat down on the bed next to me and gripped my shoulder. My skin heated up under his palm.
"Me too, sorry." I could have put my words more eloquently but I was too surprised. Surprised at the fact that I was letting Charlie touch me. This is going to make me sound neurotic so don't judge me but I usually hate touching people unless I'm really comfortable with them which rules out most everyone I know. I'm not big on human contact; sometimes I go out of my way to make sure I don't bump shoulders or legs or even touch hands when passing something. But with Charlie it felt natural.
He carefully leaned his head on my shoulder, bouncing his leg against mine.
"I'm bored," he said.
"God you're so whiney." I couldn't help laughing. Finally I broke away and jumped up off the bed.
"We could get some of this homework done," I suggested. "Like the English paper maybe?" Charlie rolled around on my bed, twisting up the sheets.
"Noooo," he moaned. I rolled my eyes.
"You barge in on me and demand attention then you turn down my ideas of what to do, you're a fantastic guy you know that Conway?"
"You can cut down on the sarcasm," he shot back, but he was struggling not to laugh, I could tell.
"Okay, okay, some English homework, then we get to watch a
movie."
"Your choice?" I asked, trying to look as pained as possible. I'm guessing that pillow thrown at me was a
yes.
~*~
Charlie's POV
I kept looking over at Adam who was sitting cross-legged on the bed, laptop whirring in front of him. He was staring at the screen so intensely it was cute. He must really want to do well. Me? I couldn't care less. While Adam was working, I just laid on the other bed, thinking, yes, I, Charlie Conway, was thinking, hard, for once.
It's just…Linda. There's nothing inherently wrong with her but at the same time there's nothing great about her either. I can get really nitpicky and rag on every little thing so it wasn't much of a surprise that I was being so annoyed about one little thing about her. It was when I first saw her and she says in this tired voice, "You're a jock, aren't you?" No shit, did she not see that bright green jersey I was wearing? Obviously she wasn't as smart as she came off to be.
So then why have I been following her around? I can't answer that either. I don't know why, I just am, for the sake of having something to do maybe. Opposites attract maybe? I feel like I should. It's probably because suddenly the Ducks team is all about raging hormones and finding that significant other. Well, everyone but Adam of course, and maybe Ken but he doesn't really count. Sometimes I wonder if Ken really is the same age as us. Maybe it's a smart kids thing, they're both in all AP classes, so maybe smart kids don't get affected by something as petty as hormones.
Well the point is everyone on the team is suddenly scrambling for someone else to be attached by the hip to so I guess I sort of fell into Linda. But lately I'm wondering if that was a wrong choice. I mean, don't get me wrong, she is pretty, in a girlish sort of way, which is predictable because yes, she is a girl, but I don't find anything special about her. Speaking of how she looks, she looks basically like everyone else, a lot like Connie actually, which sort of unnerves me. She's got those big eyes and soft hair and a smile like none other but then why am I not attracted to her? I ask myself that every day.
I hear a little cough from my right and I look over to see Adam frowning and peering at the laptop screen with still the same intensity as he was before. I bite my lip slightly. Maybe I do know why I'm not attracted to Linda.
~*~
Riley's POV
"Fast food is god," Scooter declared. Why did he have to be so dumb sometimes? Sure he's a nice guy but does he have to say stupid stuff like that? I just shoved a bunch of rapidly cooling French fries in my mouth. Scooter was still cool though, he knew me well enough to know that I hated small talk. He wasn't a moron and just let us eat in silence comfortably.
I could tell he was thinking about that freshman, Julie, by that dazed expression on his face. I was thinking about a freshman too but obviously not Julie. I remember first time it was announced that a freshman had joined our team; it was unheard of. I didn't want some kid thinking he's the shit coming in and taking over the team. That was until I saw Adam.
He looked slightly awkward with fine, blonde hair parted perfectly, which was the first sign that let me in on a little bit of Adam's secret world. He had the usual innocent face and had a pretty wasted looking body for a hockey player. It wasn't his looks that pissed me off, it was the way he acted, so quiet and reserved. It made me want to break him even more.
Eventually the boys on the team asked me why I was taking the hazing so far. They're all dumbasses so they believed me when I threw in the 'he's a freshman' excuse. Obviously they don't know me well enough to know that I usually wouldn't give a rat's ass about a freshman; why waste my time on them?
"This is your new team member, Adam Banks," said Coach Orion. I gave this Adam character a quick look over. He was smaller than anyone else on the team but he also looked like he'd be fast. I caught his eye and gave him a smile but his eyes were glazed over. That annoyed me; it wasn't like I approved just anyone.
His eyes held that glazed look for most of the conversation between Coach Orion and me. He was telling me the background of Adam, what position he played, all useless shit. I pretended to listen while watching Adam from the corner of my eye. His eyes suddenly focused and he was completely alert, his whole body tense. I followed his eyes to see what he was staring at. It was a freshman kid walking by. They made eye contact and Adam's body tensed up even more. The other kid frowned and walked faster out of sight.
"Okay Adam," I said, in the kindest voice I could possibly manage. "How about we go to the ice and practice?" He seemed to snap out of his mini-drama reverie and finally his clear blue eyes focused on me.
"Okay," he said softly. He kept his eyes in the direction of where the other kid had gone.
"Who was that? A friend?"
"Kind of."
"Looks like you guys were fighting."
"I guess so." I was marveling at how nice I sounded but the effect was lost on Adam.
"Well don't let it bother you. When you're on the ice everything else just disappears." Finally, there was a tiny hint of a smile on his pale lips.
"Okay."
That was how I first met him. I guess I don't know why I was so nice to him at first. He just seemed lost and sick and I wanted to help him but he ended up pissing me off just like how everyone always does. No one's is who they seem and no one wants know me after they find out what I'm really like.
"Riley." I scowled and looked over at Scooter who shrugged apologetically.
"It's time to head back to school if we want to catch world civ."
"Fuck that."
"Maybe you can but I can't, you know how uptight my family is about grades." After a pause he added, "And if I get lower than a 2.5 cumulative GPA I can't play on the team."
"Fine." As we drove back to Eden Hall, we passed by that same freshman that had been the center of Adam's melodrama. At least I was pretty sure it was him, with the same curly, dark brown hair and lanky form. Sure enough, it was the annoying kid, who also happened to be the unofficial captain of the JV team, the one who wouldn't shut up about geese or whatever.
"Pull up by that kid," I ordered. Scooter obeyed and I lowered my side of the window.
"Hey you." The kid kept walking.
"HEY." He turned around and frowned slightly, obviously he recognized me too. He walked, warily, to the car nonetheless.
"What do you want Riley?"
"You're friends with Banksie, aren't you?" He nodded slightly.
"Tell him to meet me at the fountain tonight at 8:00, he'll understand why."
"No, sorry," he said, with an easy shrug. "We're hanging out tonight. Maybe some other time." I frowned, pissed off.
"Just tell him, he'll come." The other kid looked equally pissed off.
"No, I told you, he can't meet you because he's gonna hang out with me. What part of that do you not get?"
"Hey, I never asked for your opinion, freshman. My word goes." He shrugged again.
"Whatever." Something told me he wasn't going to pass on the message. I'd have to do it myself.
"Go," I ordered Scooter. He started driving away and I watched the kid's reflection grow smaller on the rearview mirror. What a little shit head. Hanging out with him? Like hell he was going to.
Scooter was looking at me weird.
"What was that all about?"
"Nothing, just messing with our rivals. No, they're not even good enough to be called that, we'll flatten them in the JV-Varsity game." Scooter, on the outside, let it go, but I could tell the cogs were churning in his head. My mind kept running back to the JV captain's defiance. No sorry, we're hanging out tonight. No, tonight was Adam and my night.
~*~
A/N: Cliffhanger (sort of)! Please R&R on your way out!
Meg- I hope this was enough Riley for you. For some reason, it's hard to write from Charlie's POV and I love writing from Adam's, it's just easier that way. Riley's is also fun because I get to experiment (there's not as much of him in the movies). Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this chapter!
Canadian-hockey-girl- yeah I wouldn't either but Banks is a very forgiving person…I did kind of want to start the story where they're still fighting but chose not to…but then again that's what flashbacks are for…
Kshyne99- I hate Julie/Adam too! In fact, I hate any Duck/Julie for some reason. Julie/Scooter is much better…thanks for the compliments!
Horisont- I'm worried too ^^
Crazy4nc128- sorry this was so late in being updated ~_~ usually I'm a diligent worker but midterms took over my life ugh…
Anne918- there were definitely feelings before but not out in the open yet…but the possibility of them becoming in a couple in the future? Definitely a good possibility ^^
Nebula2- yeah, this will be slash (sorry) but if you don't mind it, it'd be cool if you kept on reading it, or my other MD fanfic because it's still slash but that doesn't dominate the story as much.
Moonlight Phoenix1- I love your story! I'm eagerly waiting for your next chapter, can't wait until it's up!
Thanks also to: SuperSteph, BloodyRaine, Cassie, and darkdestiny2000.
