A/n: Hey. Happy Mothers day.
Chapter Five: The First Vanquish
We walked out of the attic downstairs. As I passed under the chandelier I felt a jolt, almost an electric shock, and a bright beam of light burst from it and bathed me in a bright light. At least I didn't jump this time, that was an improvement but I was still freaked. I put on my best on unimpressed voice, "Is that supposed to be symbolic or something?"
"It happened to Prue, Piper and I three years ago," said Phoebe. "So I think it means you belong here."
I don't think Phoebe had any idea how happy that made me feel. I had somewhere I belonged.
The manor's front doors flung open. A mini-tornado whirled into the foyer, knocking the three of us to the floor. I screamed or at least I think I did. I felt paralyzed. He reared back to take us all out with one enormous concussive blast.
Crawling in my skin
Consuming all I feel
Fear is how I fall
Confusing what is real
There's something inside me that pulls beneath the surface
Consuming/confusing
This lack of self-control I fear is never-ending
Controlling/I can't seem
Phoebe kicked Shax in the face and yelled to Piper, "Go to the attic, show her the spell."
Piper yanked me toward the stairs and then the parlays wore off. I could do this I wasn't a scared twelve year old afraid of Shax. Sure I was scared but I also felt strangely confident. I had the power and knowledge this time.
Piper raced over to the Book she had been looking at earlier.
"What are we doing? What is that thing?" I pointed at the book.
"I'll explain if there's a later," said Piper frantically flipping through the pages.
"Thanks for your vote in confidence," I muttered.
To find myself again
My walls are closing in
[Without a sense of confidence and I'm convinced
That there's too much pressure to take]
I've felt this way before
So insecure
"I'm sure you'll do fine you're reacting a lot better than I did with my first warlock. Just say the spell out loud."
Another roar of wind signaled Shax's approach. I could barely catch my breath when he tornadoed into the attic. He poofed into his corporeal self. Hopefully Phoebe was ok. There was only one thing I could do now despite how weird and stupid in made me feel. I started chanting,
"Evil wind that blows,
That which forms below
No longer may you dwell,
Death take you with this spell."
As I spoke the incantation, Shax reeled back, readying once again to destroy me but at me but when I said the last word he suddenly screamed in agony. Then exploded in a fiery blast, much more extreme and final then when Phoebe had said the spell. I couldn't help but scream. It wasn't that I was scared not this time; the scream was the one I had suffocated two years ago. It was a massive sense of relief that was gone.
"That was for, Prue," I whispered. "And all the other people you killed that I loved and cared about." Piper didn't hear what I said. I think she was on a high from the same massive relief I felt but I wasn't full of relief. I had just killed something. Granted Shax was evil and wasn't even human I felt guilty like I should be punished or something, whatever happens when you murder.
When I was a kid before Shax took it upon himself to make my life a living hell and I began to realize that I was freak I was happy and sure I was happy now but not the same happiness. I grew up so that's bound to change but there was something else.
Piper and Phoebe had turned me into a witch.
Discomfort, endlessly has pulled itself upon me
Distracting/reacting
Against my will I stand beside my own reflection
It's haunting how I can't seem…
But isn't that what I was destined to be? Didn't I have a choice? I was just forced into this role without anyone asking me first. It's like I'm a puppet and everyone else was pulling me strings making me move with wondering what I wanted. Both the good guys and the bad guys. Grams and Shax both wanted to mould be into something.
They can't just let me be that eight year old who should've grown up without all this. I'm not eight anymore I can't be that kid again and I don't want to be. I want to be me but I can't seem to find myself.
"It's over," said Piper quietly, "It's all finally over." She sounded sad and relieved. I knew she hadn't meant for me to hear so I pretended I didn't. It was over for her. It was had just begun for me. If I had kids I'd doom them to the same fate. I remember what Grams said. She said I couldn't fight it and that I had to accept it.
Maybe it wouldn't be too bad. How many teenagers can say that they have a purpose in life that's not just to be annoying? I wasn't just wasting air. I had a destiny.
"Phoebe," I yelled remembering her. Then Piper and I took off downstairs to see if she was ok. I saw Leo kneeling over her and light come from his hands.
"Wh-what is he doing?" I stammered backing away slightly.
"He's healing her," Piper told me. At my blank look he continued. "Remember I told you he died? Well he's a white lighter, a guardian angel for good witches. If you get injured he can heal it and he helps you through tough times."
He sounds like a nice guy. I really could've used him a few years ago. Not now though. Sure I still I had my issues but they didn't matter as much.
"Did you vanquish him?" Phoebe asked me eagerly.
"He went with a bang," I said, "also a fiery blast."
"Are you ok?" Piper asked Phoebe.
"Yeah, he was too busy trying to after Paige to try and kill me I was a minor nuisance," said Phoebe wryly.
And at that moment everything was finally okay in my life and then I remembered. "Oh shit. What time is it? I'm supposed to be at my new 'family' around about now."
Leo looked at his watch, "Five to one."
"I get to discover a whole new life about me, become a witch, vanquish demon butt and still have five minutes to spare. Cool."
"Where do you need to go?" Asked Piper sounding amused.
It was a big improvement from glaring daggers at me.
"1175 Prescott Street," I said.
"It takes more than five minutes to get there," said Piper.
"Of course," I said dryly, "Can't have something to turn out right, ever." Ok that didn't come out as bitter as it sound it my head, good.
"I can orb you there," offered Leo.
"Orb?" I asked blankly and slightly suspicious.
"When I left the room before in the blue lights," he explained.
"Does it hurt?"
"Painless," reassured Phoebe.
"Why not?" I said
