Content: Mature subject matter, m/m slash.

Character/s: Shawn Michaels, Hunter, Steve Austin

Disclaimer: I own NO ONE depicted in these fics. I am not endorsed by any person, corporation, federation, promotion, etc., nor do I receive any monies for writing sick and twisted tales of their imagined goings-on. All quotations come from the King James Bible. No infringement is intended so please don't sue. Lyrics, quotations, etc. used without permission. No infringement or disrespect to the various artisans is intended, so please don't sue me.

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"Nothing lasts forever."

Not hopes, not dreams, not illusions of perfect love.

Shawn could recall to the very day exactly how long it had been since he and Hunter had last shared a bed. A long time, to be sure, but the memories, if he could just make the memories stop coming...

If anything would be his undoing, it would be having to see Hunter at work and remember what had been. What could never be again. What he still found himself missing today.

// The former things have passed away (Rev. 21:4) \\

Things were different for Shawn now. He'd made the choice to turn away from the past and embrace a new lifestyle. Religion had brought him so much he never even knew was lacking in his life. It would be the perfect haven but for the fact that it kept him from re-kindling what he had with his former best friend.

So long as he stayed true to his faith, there could be no going back. His faith was all he had now, all he needed. Or so he told himself every day.

// For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out (Rom. 7:18) \\

It was agonizing now to watch Hunter as he moved from conquest to conquest, knowing the disapproving stand his denomination took on such matters. Sure, he'd engaged in the very same activities before he'd been saved, but it wasn't something he was supposed to miss anymore.

Here lately, he found himself realizing that he'd turned his back on more than just his former lover when he walked away from their apartment for the last time. There was so much that he felt he'd lost and he found himself continually plagued with self-doubt.

// When you are tempted, He will also provide a way out (1 Cor. 10:13) \\

Shawn struggled to find activities to occupy his time, to stay focused, to hold firm to his resolve. He stopped going out with the guys after the shows, he kept his nose buried in the Good Book when he wasn't working, and he did everything possible to keep his mind off the one thing he knew would be his undoing. He told himself day in and day out that he did not miss what he had with Hunter, nor would he ever regret the choice he made.

He also knew just how much of a charade it all was. Every movement, every thought, every unspoken word. All just a charade.

// Whoever keeps the whole law and yet stumbles at one point is guilty of breaking all of it (James 2:10) \\

He DID miss Hunter, and to make things even worse, he believed everyone could see right through his feigned indifference. The only suitable course of action left to him was complete and utter avoidance. Which was impossible, considering how the writers seemed bound and determined to keep the two of them involved in storyline after storyline. It was if the devil himself was working for the WWE and using any and every weapon in his arsenal to cause Shawn to stumble.

His co-workers didn't seem to be very sympathetic, either. They'd all had their fill of Shawn talking about his new lifestyle and his God and his faith and how much he'd changed. But they were the same people who'd seen the old Shawn getting trashed at hotel bars, whoring around with the best of them. That is, until he hooked up with Hunter. Then he'd actually settled down and seemed genuinely happy.

// Escape the corruption in the world caused by evil desires (2 Peter 1:4) \\

He'd long since begun to dread showing up for work each day, knowing it would be yet another day of fighting his own inner demons, of having to use every ounce of resolve he possessed not to approach Hunter. Any excuse to talk to him seemed to be a good one. To practice a few moves, to spot him at the gym while working out, to bounce storyline ideas off of. But these were things that any other superstar on the roster could do, so he always refrained.

Night after night in any of a hundred different hotel rooms he'd find himself sitting up in bed, staring at the walls, the television turned off. The urge to make that fateful call would come on so fast and so strong that he'd reach for his cell phone a dozen times, never quite being able to get past the fourth or fifth number before ending the call and setting the phone aside once again.

// To keep me from becoming conceited, there was given me a thorn in my flesh to torment me (2 Cor. 12:7) \\

What he always ended up picking up was his Bible, which was never far from his side. He read different Psalms and Proverbs over and over again, reminding himself that the answers he was looking for were all contained inside. He'd memorized several dozen passages already, and could quote the story of Samson and Delilah almost chapter and verse.

He likened his own struggles to those of the Biblical strongman whose downfall was brought about by his blind love for a treacherous lover. In many ways, he saw his ongoing moral and emotional anguish as his punishment for having lived such a Godless life for so long. All the people he'd wronged, all the hearts he'd broken, all of it was coming back to haunt him. There seemed to be no end in sight.

// He who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind (James 1:6) \\

He would always have Hunter in his life somehow. Tormenting him, antagonizing him, reminding him on a near-daily basis of just how much he missed his former lifestyle. A lifestyle he could never return to if he intended to have even a shred of self-respect left to him.

But he wanted that one part of his past back so badly it hurt. He'd wake up from vivid dreams with Hunter's name on the tip of his tongue, his heart pounding wildly, wanting so very badly to undo the past. And still he couldn't give in.

// Better is open rebuke than hidden love (Proverbs 27:5) \\

Then there was night that Shawn bladed a little too deeply and had to practically be carried out of the ring. Hunter maintained his composure, strutting and posturing in the ring just long enough to carry off his heel role before retreating quickly to the back to check on Shawn. His show of genuine concern, however, was met with a cold, stony response, with the smaller man declaring that he needed no man's pity, least of all Hunter's.

What Shawn was afraid to admit was that he was deeply touched by Hunter's fussy, motherly concern. But he could never allow the other man to know just how much he'd been affected. Instead, he retreated behind a stoic facade, informing Hunter that the medics had things well in hand and that his worry, while appreciated, was unnecessary and unwanted.

// Pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up (Ecc. 4:10) \\

And so Hunter walked out of the locker room and straight to the hotel bar where he proceeded to drink himself into oblivion before calling Steve Austin to join him for the night. A night where Hunter took out all of his frustrations at Shawn's cold demeanor on his companion, leaving Steve shivering and bleeding from half a dozen places before finally passing out.

Steve was no fool, of course, and knew exactly what the cause of Hunter's irritation was. A person would have to be blind not to see how Shawn still carried a torch for the bigger man. And Hunter was just as bad, flaunting all of his current love interests right under Shawn's nose. One side or the other was going to have to give in. It was inevitable.

// Oh that I might have my request; that God would grant me the thing that I long for! (Job 6:8) \\

Shawn stared at the note in his hand, reading it again and again to be sure his eyes weren't deceiving him. It was from Hunter, saying how he was genuinely sorry for the errors of the past, and if Shawn might agree to meet him for dinner, they might be able to act in a mature manner. It just wasn't like Hunter to give in first, but Shawn told himself that he was adult enough to at least give him the benefit of the doubt. After all, how much harm could a simple dinner cause?

He arrived at the room indicated in the note, wondering if they were going to adjourn to the hotel restaurant downstairs, or if Hunter had a local destination in mind. He was met at the door by a very surprised Hunter, freshly showered and wearing nothing but a soft, fluffy towel around his waist.

// The thing which I greatly feared is come upon me (Job 3:25) \\

Shawn stared, open-mouthed, the note in his hand drifting slowly to the floor at the sight before him. Beads of water clung to Hunter's skin which was still steaming from the hot shower. Narrow rivers ran from Hunter's damp hair, weaving their way around the many curves and planes of his body, mesmerising Shawn.

Hunter struggled to mask his surprise. Shawn was the last person he ever expected to show up at his hotel room. Deciding that the least he could do was be polite and invite him in, he moved aside to give Shawn space to enter the room. He could see Shawn trying not to stare, every gaze full of naked lust. He had yet to utter a single word, choosing instead to sit on the edge of the bed, fidgeting nervously with his hands.

// As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another (Proverbs 27:17) \\

Hunter walked over to the wall mirror, giving Shawn a clear view of his well-muscled back, and proceeded to slowly brush his hair. Neither man spoke, but Shawn was finding it harder and harder to remain where he sat. He had to speak. He had to flee the room.

He did neither.

// A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother (John 15:15) \\

As Shawn slowly moved to stand behind Hunter, the larger man turned around and caught Shawn in a crushing embrace. He lowered his head to Shawn's, who met him halfway. As their mouths met in a searing kiss that spoke of months of self-denial, Hunter finally spoke. A one-word question.

"Why?"

Shawn pressed his body closer to Hunter's, moving with a restless urgency. He replied so softly that Hunter had to strain to make out the words. "I got your note."

// Speak forth the words of truth (Acts 26:25) \\

As Hunter steered Shawn towards the bed, the towel around his waist finally fell away. As he lowered himself on top of Shawn, his whispered reply was barely audible.

"What note?"