Behind Blue Eyes by Miaka Kennyuuki

(Song Fic) Slash - Draco/Harry PG-13

Summary: Draco contemplates how his life has been lived, and the one reason he wishes to change.

(But my dreams, they aren't as empty as my conscience seems to be. I have hours only lonely my love is vengence that's never free.)

//No one knows what it's like, to be mistreated, to be defeated, Behind blue eyes.//

"Behind Blue Eyes", Limp Bizkit

*Draco's POV*

Pansy had been completely serious, as was evidenced by the owl coming toward me at breakfast a week after the confrontation. This past week she'd tried everything, from groping me to begging me to give in to her demands. Normally, I'd fold. Self-preservation and all that. But weighing the possiblities of sleeping with Pansy to getting tortured by my father, I'm sure many can understand my decision to accept the torture.

Finally, around 2:00pm yesterday afternoon, Pansy had reached her limit. It might have been the Bat Bogey hex I'd thrown at her that was the real deciding factor, but I couldn't be sure. Right that minute she'd run off to the Owlry, much like I'd thought she had that first night.

And here I was, cowering delicately in my seat, looking absolutely gorgeous, I knew, awaiting the missive from my father. I snuck a glance toward Potter, once again struck by the vivid green of his eyes and the unruly order of his hair. Those emerald orbs contained concern..for me. I was overjoyed, ecstatic, glazing over with wonderment for a short while. Then my father's letter fell in my lap and the happiness was replaced with despair.

With visible dread, I lifted the valum envelope and opened it. The thick parchment of the letter fell out and opened of its own accord. The letter whispered to me, one line. 'Malfoy's are never publicly humiliated.' That could only mean one thing. My father meant to humiliate me with a howler, and wanted me to move to my room with his missive. I said the appropriate code that granted me ten minutes before the letter was due to go off. Throwing a short glance Potter's way, I jumped up and hurried toward my dorm.

Once in my room, I threw the parchment away from me. It exploded in a ball of flames and a tall form emerged. Lucius Malfoy, come to give me the punishment I deserved. Nifty way to get past the wards, hm?

"Draco," Father whispered, his ice blue eyes narrowed. "What's this I hear about you loving Potter? Parkinson gave me a very detailed account." I snorted. Father was stating Pansy's name clearly in case I wished retribution for ratting me out. He most likely hoped I would exact revenge. It was the mark of a Malfoy to let no wrong done to you go unrighted. Or at least repaid.

"Pansy has a small mental problem, Father. They have dubbed it Draconis Obsessionica, since it mainly centers around her obsession of me," I said clearly, trying to keep the fear inside until he started beating me. "Apparently Pansy heard more of her voices, and tried to blackmail me into giving her sexual favors."

My Father growled at that. Though he was displeased with me, he was obviously much more incensed with Pansy. Another Malfoy rule was broken. A Malfoy is never propositioned, they do the propositioning. Pansy had definitely crossed a line this time. "So Parkinson propositioned you, eh?" my Father muttered. Finally, he turned back to me. "That is no excuse. I have several written accounts of the scene with Potter under the tree by the lake."

"But how? There were only a few Huffle--oh," I said, realisation dawning. Father had members of each House under his control.

"I have a few Hufflepuffs in my pocket," he said. "Bloody useful, that." Father grinned ferally. "That is beside the point, Draco. Are you ready to accept your punishment?" I sighed. Here goes nothing. I nodded. "Good. Prepare yourself! Crucio!"

The Unforgivable Curse hit me hard, knocking me from my feet. I whimpered in pain, but tried to hold most of my responses back. Malfoy rule number ten, show no pain, ever. These rules were bloody annoying.

It was around then that I blacked out.

***TBC***