CHAPTER FOUR
The Medical Office of Michael Burton, MD
Monday, April 5, 2004
9:15 AM
Mike was reviewing a patient's file when the intercom buzzed.
"Dr. Burton?" the receptionist's voice asked.
"Yes?" Mike responded.
"Stuckeyville Body Shop called," the receptionist said. "They said you could pick the van up this afternoon."
"Okay," Mike answered. "Thanks, Julie."
Mike sighed, remembering the evening two weeks prior when he had pulled into the driveway to see the van's rear bumper with a massive dent in it. According to Nancy, she had come out of the grocery store to find the dent – someone had obviously backed into the parked van and then driven off without leaving a note.
Nancy had been particularly livid over the incident since the van was only two months old. She had ranted and raved about incompetent and inconsiderate drivers for almost 15 minutes. Mike, who had been fairly upset himself when he saw the damage, had actually had to calm her down, thereby releasing his own anger.
Of course, Mike knew the truth now.
Mike shook his head and focused his attention back on Sam Shandly's charts prior to seeing him in the exam room. Shandly had come in for a routine medical exam a couple of weeks before and his blood work had turned up very high blood glucose levels. A check of Shandly's charts indicated a family history of diabetes, which explained Shandly's frequent urination, sudden weight loss, and some other symptoms.
Mike had called Shandly to arrange a consultation to break the news and to go over treatment and control options with him. Mike also wanted to run through some routine checks (weight, blood pressure, etc.) that he could only do in the exam room.
Mike sighed, knowing that it was going to require a *huge* change in Sam's lifestyle – the man had a *serious* "sweet tooth".
Mike closed the chart and walked from his office towards the exam room. He called out, "Wendy, would you have Dr. Smiley meet me in Exam Room Two, please?"
"He's already in there, Dr. Burton," Wendy called back in a strange voice.
As Mike finished walking towards the exam room, he thought back to Rob Smiley's arrival that morning. Smiley had arrived about half past eight dressed in a nice shirt, tie, and a comfortable pair of pants and shoes. He had a large bag over his shoulder. Before Mike could ask about the bag, Smiley had asked if there was somewhere he could "get ready" as he phrased. Mike showed him to his old office and told him that they started seeing patients at nine o'clock sharp (just one of the things that Mike had unconsciously picked up from Dr. Jerome).
Since then, Mike had seen neither hide nor hair of Smiley.
Mike stopped outside the door and took a deep breath. He hated giving patients bad news, but at least they had caught the diabetes at an early stage when controlling it would be easier. He was surprised to hear laughter coming from inside the exam room.
Mike took another deep breath, then opened the door and walked inside. As he stepped inside, he froze.
As Wendy had indicated, Dr. Smiley was in the exam room with Sam Shandly. What she had neglected to mention (and probably the reason she had sounded strange to Mike) was that Smiley was dressed as a clown.
Smiley was wearing a neon blue wig, clown white covered his face, red face paint creating a wide buffer around his mouth, and, of course, a large red clown nose. Although he still had on the shirt, tie, and pants, Smiley now wore a pair of oversize clown shoes (at least two feet long) that were bright green. He wore a doctor's smock in the most eye-dazzling color combination possible. Mike noted a stethoscope in the smock's right pocket as well as a fake one wrapped around Smiley's neck – and it was obvious from Shandly's saturated face that it squirted water.
Mike stood there in severe shock for several seconds. Although he could not speak, his mind was racing. Mike thought about a comment Smiley had made on Friday coupled with Mike's own feeling that he new Smiley's name from somewhere when it hit him like a ton of bricks.
'Smiling Smiley the Clown!!' Mike thought in even more shock. "Damn! I used to watch Smiling Smiley when I was growing up! Rob must be his son. No *wonder* I recognized the name! He's even made up exactly like Smiling Smiley!!'
It took a few seconds for Smiley and Shandly to note that Mike was standing in the door with his mouth hanging open.
"Hey, Dr. Burton!" Sam Shandly said as he suppressed another chuckle.
"Dr. Burton," Smiley said with a ... smile.
"Urg," was all Mike managed at first. He cleared his throat and tried again, "Good morning."
Mike stood in the doorway for another moment looking back and forth between Smiley and Shandly, before he closed his eyes for a moment.
"Mr. Shandly," Mike said, "could I borrow Dr. Smiley for a moment? I'd like to speak to him privately."
"Sure, Doc," Shandly replied.
Mike motioned Smiley out into the hallway. Mike winced as Smiley walked out of the exam room, over-exaggerating his movements in the large clown shoes. Shandly was fascinated, his head bobbing up and down in time to Smiley's steps as he watched Smiley exit the room.
Mike gave a strained smile to Shandly before shutting the door. Mike took a deep breath before turning to face Smiley in the hallway.
Before Mike could say anything, Smiley said, "Hey, Mike. What's up?"
"Dr. Smiley ... Rob ... I ... that is ..." Mike paused then blurted out "What the hell is with the clown suit?"
"I like to set people at ease, Mike," Smiley said. "People tend to stress out coming to see the doctor. I dress up as a clown and people relax. I mean ... who doesn't love a clown?"
Mike clenched his jaw for a moment, then said, "Don't you think you should have informed me of this on Friday – or at least this morning?"
"Nah," Smiley said and grinned, "it was more fun to see your expression when you walked into the exam room."
Down the hallway, Mike could hear Wendy's laughter.
"Look, Mike, it really works," Smiley continued. "Patients relax more around me. Hey, it worked for Patch Adams, didn't it?"
Mike still wasn't sure what he was going to do ... and he never did find out, because he heard someone exclaim from behind him, "What the high hell is going on in this place?"
Mike paled and closed his eyes in panic. 'NNNOOO! Not now, please ... not now!!' But as he turned around, Mike knew that his most fervent prayers wouldn't save him.
Standing in the hallway, hands on his hips and glaring at Mike and Dr. Smiley, was Dr. Jerome. Although he wasn't wearing his doctor's smock any longer, he still had on an outfit that he would have worn at the office - slacks, shirt, tie, sweater, and jacket.
As Mike completed his turn, Dr. Jerome said, "Oh, Dr. Burton! When I saw a clown standing in the hallway I thought for sure that you had finally heard your true calling."
"Walter," Mike said, "I ..."
"Walter?!!" Dr. Jerome bellowed. "Just because I was forced to turn this practice over to you before I think you were ready does not mean that we are on a first name basis, *Doctor* Burton!" Dr. Jerome had said the word "Doctor" with contempt.
Mike gritted his teeth in frustration, then said, "I'm sorry. Dr. Jerome, let me explain..."
"Oh," Dr. Jerome interrupted with biting sarcasm, "no need to explain. It's obvious what's going on here!"
"It is?" Mike asked.
"Of course it is, Dr. Burton," Dr. Jerome said. "You decided to look for a new medical partner and immediately went for someone who was as much of a clown as you are."
"Excuse me, Dr. Jerome," Smiley attempted to say, but Dr. Jerome cut him off.
"Zip it, Clarabell!!" Dr. Jerome roared.
Dr. Jerome then whirled on Mike and, with a raised finger, thundered, "I realize that you are several clowns short of a full clown car, but I did not retire and hand this practice over to you so you could turn it into some sort of circus. The next time I stop in, I had better not see Chuckles (Dr. Jerome jerked his thumb in the direction of Smiling Dr. Smiley)! Do I make myself clear?"
"Yes, Dr. Jerome," Mike said instinctively.
Dr. Jerome glared at both men individually for a moment, then turned and stormed out. Dr. Smiley looked at Mike, who simply shrugged. Dr. Smiley's shoulders slumped as he turned away and headed back towards Mike's old office. As he got to the office door, he removed the wig with a defeated tug.
Mike was still standing there, listening to Wendy's raucous laughter from the front desk, when he remembered that Dr. Jerome really didn't have the authority to dictate who Mike chose as a partner. With a sigh, Mike decided it was for the best anyway.
***
The Pie Shop
Monday, April 5, 2004
12:30 PM
Mike and Ed were sitting at the pie shop, a big burger with fries on a plate in front of each of them, and cokes off to the side.
Ed was laughing so hard, he actually had tears in his eyes as he listened to Mike recount his morning with Drs. Smiley and Jerome. Mike did *not* look amused at Ed's laughter.
"Oh, man," Ed said as his laughter finally started to taper off. "Smiling Smiley! I remember watching him on Channel 4 when we were growing up. He was great!"
"Yeah, Ed," Mike said a little caustically, "he may have been great as a kid's show host on television, but not as a doctor!"
"Right, right," Ed tried – and failed – to say seriously. It might have been the big grin on his face that caused him to fail so miserably at it.
'I've had enough of this,' Mike thought. He took a big bite of his burger, followed it with a couple of fries for good measure and silently chewed for a moment.
"So, Ed," Mike said deliberately, "how come you haven't asked Carol yet? Getting cold feet?"
Ed's smiled disappeared in an instant and he glared at Mike for a moment.
"No," Ed replied, "I haven't gotten cold feet. You know how I had gotten interrupted the other night?"
"Yeah," Mike said, glad to be talking about someone else's problems for a moment, "some screw-up with Phil or something."
"Right," Ed said. "Well, I tried to ask Carol again on Friday around lunchtime. I was all ready to do it, when..."
Mike interrupted, "Not another cell phone call!?"
"No," Ed replied after a sip of his coke, "I left the cell phone in the Explorer. No, this time it was Molly. She paged Carol to her office."
"You're not getting any breaks, are you," Mike said. Ed simply nodded as he bit into his burger.
Mike continued, "So why didn't you do it over the weekend?"
"It just didn't seem like I could find the right moment," Ed confessed. "I mean, I could have done it at any point, there were plenty of opportunities. We were home alone most of the weekend, but Carol was acting really weird all weekend."
"Weird?" Mike asked as he shoved a handful of fried in his mouth. "Weird how?"
"Its hard to define," Ed said in frustration. "I could just tell that something was on her mind and bothering her, but she kept on telling me that nothing was wrong. She was a little distant in fact."
"Hmph," Mike said around another mouthful of burger.
Ed looked at Mike for a moment, then said, "What do you mean, 'Hmph'?"
"Nothing," Mike replied after he has swallowed.
"Come on, Mike," Ed persisted. "You must have meant something by it otherwise you wouldn't have said, 'Hmph'."
"Ed," Mike said, "sometimes a 'Hmph' is just a 'Hmph'."
"Oh," Ed said and took another bite of his burger. "Hmph."
"Have you asked Molly?" Mike asked.
"No," Ed answered. "I don't really want to do any more end runs around Carol. I'm sure Molly would know, but I've gotten Molly – and myself – into too much trouble by going that route. I think I'll just have to wait until Carol tells me."
"You're really prepared to wait that long, huh?" Mike asked after a moment.
"Funny, Mike," Ed said sarcastically while Mike just grinned.
The two finished their lunches and settled their bill. On their way out the door, Ed looked at his watch and said, "Damn, I'm going to have to hustle. I've got to meet Mayor Kendricks at one o'clock and I still need to get some stuff from StuckeyBowl. I should have just brought it with me."
"Alright, buddy," Mike said and watched Ed start to head off. Mike suddenly remembered something and called out "Ed!"
Ed stopped and turned around, eyebrows raised inquiringly.
"I almost forgot," Mike said, "Nancy wanted to know if you and Carol were free for dinner tomorrow night."
"Not me," Ed said. "I'm heading to Columbus tonight on this stuff for Mayor Kendricks. I won't be back until late Wednesday night. Carol should be free though. Have Nancy call her. Gotta run."
Ed turned and walked away at a rapid clip while Mike himself started to head back to his office.
'Now ... I've got to set up some other interviews,' Mike thought with frustration.
***
Stuckeyville High School
Monday, April 5, 2004
3:00 PM
Carol straightened her desk up after she finished grading some papers. She always liked to have everything neatly in its place. She chuckled softly to herself, knowing that she had to bite her tongue at home frequently. It wasn't like Ed was a slob, but he did have a few annoying habits that she wanted to break him of – like leaving the cap off the toothpaste! To deal with that, she simply made sure that she brushed her teeth after him and put the cap on herself.
She smiled again to herself, knowing that for every one of Ed's little idiosyncrasies she compensated for, there was probably one of hers that Ed compensated for. She felt a familiar warm feeling when she thought how *GOOD* her relationship with Ed had become since they'd gotten together. The friendship was still there – they hung out, joked and laughed together frequently. But she *really* liked the other side to their relationship – the quiet times curled up in his arms, kissing him, looking into his big blue eyes and losing herself, and (with a slight blush) the sex!!
As she collected her coat and purse, she sighed.
'I should just talk to Ed about what's bothering me,' she thought. 'Except that I don't know *why* its bothering me so much that Nick is married and has a couple of kids. I'm with Ed, who is *so* much better than Nick!'
Carol walked out of her classroom and down the hall towards Molly's office. She figured maybe Molly could help her understand what was bothering her so much about this. She walked in to the main office and looked around. The administrative staff had left for the day and the door to Molly's office was closed, which surprised Carol a bit.
She could hear voices from inside Molly's office and figured she must be meeting with a teacher or maybe a parent. She had just decided to leave when the door to Molly's office opened and Molly started to walk out, saying "Hold on a second, Ni...". Molly stopped in mid-word and blurted "Carol!" Molly winced as soon as she'd said it.
'Please!' Molly thought to herself, 'please do not let this happen.'
But it was too late. Molly heard movement from inside her office as she made her way over to her secretary's desk and picked up a file. A voice from inside Molly's office said, "Carol? That wouldn't be Carol Vessey would it?"
Nick Stanton stepped into view from inside Molly's office. Nick hadn't changed one bit. He was wearing his trademark outfit – a comfortable pair of jeans, Oxford shirt, and a tan blazer. Still good looking with his handsome smile plastered onto his face.
Carol completely froze in shock. Molly winced again and thought '*This* is going to be interesting!'
"It is Carol Vessey!" Nick said as he stepped out of Molly's office. "Well, well. Small world isn't it Carol?"
"Um," Carol started, then stopped long enough to swallow through a suddenly dry mouth. "Yes, I guess it is, Nick. How are you?"
As Carol asked the question she looked at Molly accusingly. Molly shrugged apologetically, but remained silent for the moment.
Nick replied, "Oh, I'm doing great, Carol! How about yourself?"
"Uh, good. Real good," Carol said somewhat lamely.
'Yeah, right,' Carol thought, 'no where near as good as you though!'
"Molly and I," Nick said, "were just going over my comments for the school assembly on Thursday. I was pleasantly surprised to find out that Molly was principal. Nice to see that things change around here."
"Yeah," Carol said. "Molls is a great principal."
"So, Carol," Nick said, "what's up with you? Still teaching English to the uneducatable teenagers?"
"Well," Carol said, "I wouldn't characterize them as uneducatable, but yes, I'm still teaching English here."
"Good," Nick said with a slight condescending tone. "So. Married? Kids?"
"Um, no," Carol said, unsure why she was answering his questions, "to both."
"Really," Nick asked in mild surprise. "I figured after you and I split that lawyer fellow ... what's his name ... Fred?"
"Ed," both Molly and Carol corrected.
"Right ... Ed," Nick said with a snap of his fingers. "I figured you and he would get together and have a bunch of little ones running around by now."
"Um, no," Carol said. "We *are* living together, but haven't gotten married and no kids."
'Dammit,' Carol mentally said to herself. 'Why am I answering such personal questions. Its none of Nick's business! Besides, its not that Ed and I don't want to get married. It's just that he hasn't asked me yet... not that THAT means anything ... he's probably waiting for the right time ... NOT that there's a wrong time or ...'
"Well," Nick said with slight superior smile and a penetrating look, "I guess some things *don't* change around here."
"What does that mean," Carol asked a little hotly.
"Oh," Nick said, "I've been gone three and a half years and you're still in pretty much the same place as then. Teaching English at the high school, living with a guy, but unmarried and with no kids. I just find it interesting."
Molly realized that she had better step in before things got worse and said, "Anyway, Nick, here's the agenda for the assembly, outlining the speaking order. Why don't you look it over and let me know if you have any questions."
Molly handed Nick a copy of the agenda, which he took and folded before slipping into his blazer.
"Say," Nick said, oblivious to the hostility he had created in Carol, "why don't we all get together for dinner. We could all catch up on things."
Molly and Carol looked at one another, then Carol said, "I don't think I can, Nick. Sorry."
"Oh, come on," Nick said, turning on the charm. "I haven't been back to Stuckeyville in a long time. I'd love to get some dinner at the Smiling Goat and talk. It would be just a shame if I had to do this on my own."
Molly sighed. She'd been told by the school board to extend every courtesy to Nick. Seems there was a rumor that Nick might make a financial contribution to the high school library and the school board wanted that rumor to become reality.
"Sounds like fun, Nick," Molly said with forced enthusiasm.
Carol's head whipped around to look at Molly. When Nick looked back at Carol with raised eyebrows, Molly gave Carol another apologetic shrug.
"And what about you, Carol," Nick asked. "Come on, no hard feelings. I'll even pay for dinner."
Carol mind reeled with all the thoughts flashing through her brain. But most of all, she wanted a chance to make Nick eat his words. Carol thought, ''some things *don't* change around here', my ass!'
"Okay," Carol said, surprising Molly so much that Molly stumbled as she moved around a desk.
"Great!" Nick said. "How about seven o'clock then at the Goat."
Both women agreed and Nick said, "Great! I'll see you then."
Nick walked out of the main office and down the hall.
"I can't believe," Molly exclaimed, "that you agreed to go to dinner with Nick!"
"Yeah," Carol said in a somewhat subdued voice, "me either. But that crack about some things not changing really bugged me and I want a chance to ..."
"A chance to what, Carol," Molly asked.
"I don't know," Carol answered. "I guess a chance to prove him wrong. I'm not the same woman I was when I was with him. I don't care *if* the circumstances that I'm in are similar to what they were three and half years ago. Things have changed!"
Molly didn't say anything, but she could tell that Carol was trying to convince herself as much as she was trying to convince Molly of that last statement.
***
The Smiling Goat
Monday, April 5, 2004
7:00 PM
Molly and Carol walked into the Smiling Goat and looked around. In the dark interior, they spotted Nick Stanton at the infamous "Nick Stanton" booth; the booth with a plaque highlighting that Nick had written one of his books at that very spot. A crowd was gathered around the booth and it was obvious that Nick was in the midst of one of his stories.
"Which story do you think he's telling," Molly asked Carol.
"Probably the one about the hat," Carol replied after a moment's thought.
They moved closer to the booth and stood at the back of the crowd.
"Now this guy was a biker," Nick was saying, "back when being a biker meant something, ya know what I'm saying? The kind of guy who'd just as soon beat you with a pipe as shake your hand. But it was my favorite hat and, damn it, I wanted it back!"
"So I looked him right in the eye," Nick continued, "and I said, 'I don't know what I'm gonna tell my mother when she finds out that I let a biker steal her hat!' And the guy's eyes widen and he rips the thing of his head and he says, 'This is a lady's hat? I ain't wearin' no lady's hat!'"
The crowd laughed loudly. Someone in the crowd called out, "So did he give it back?"
Nick pulled the hat out and put it on his head, "That answer your question?"
More laughter, then someone in the crowd said, "That was great!"
Nick laughed, then he turned to a woman sitting at the table and said, "Sorry baby, gotta keep my people happy."
The woman – a slim, very attractive blond – shook her head and said enthusiastically, "Oh, please, you know I love your stories..."
Carol was having a series of flashbacks listening to Nick and the woman – most of them unpleasant.
Nick spotted Carol and Molly in the back of the crowd and said, "Well, folks, it seems like my dinner companions have arrived, so if you'll excuse us." Nick stood up.
The crowd dispersed slowly, paying various compliments to Nick, who soaked them up like a dehydrated sponge.
Carol and Molly were finally able to make it to the table, where Nick introduced them to his wife, Heather. Heather was VERY attractive. As she stood to welcome Molly and Carol, it was obvious she was nearly identical in height to Carol. Her blond hair was about shoulder length, she had flawless white skin, brown eyes, and a full mouth. Heather and Carol looked very much alike, except that Heather was younger – and maybe a little more 'pretty' in a classic, feminine sense.
Molly and Carol shared a looked in the dim light of the Goat before they sat down. They both knew they were thinking the same thing, 'Nick never said anything about having dinner with him *and* his wife!' Molly could tell that it was going to be a long night for Carol.
The all sat down and quickly looked over the menus.
As the waiter left with their dinner orders Nick looked around and said, "You know, its good to be back. I guess I've missed the Goat more than I thought."
"Well," Molly said, "you must have realized how much you missed Stuckeyville to write a book about it."
Nick's wife looked confused, as did Nick for a moment. He said, "Have either of you read 'Small Town People'?"
"Um, no," Molly said hesitantly, "I guess we haven't. Why?"
"Because its not about Stuckeyville," Nick said.
"But what about the dedication," Molly said.
"That was my agent's idea," Nick said. "I mentioned to him at one point that if I hadn't left Stuckeyville then I wouldn't have moved to Humblertown, Connecticut – another small town – and I wouldn't have met Heather. He thought it would make for great irony to thank the small town I left in a book about the small town I found everything I was looking for in."
Nick just looked at the shocked expressions on Molly and Carol's faces. He continued, "Of course, he and I never expected for Stuckeyville City Council to give me an award for the dedication. I guess they thought the book was about Stuckeyville too. Of course, there are a lot of similarities, so it could be easy to make that mistake."
Nick had a sudden thought and said, "Hey! Wait! You don't think people are thinking I'm talking about Carol in the book do you? I mean, if they think I'm talking about Stuckeyville ..."
Carol looked at Nick in surprise. He chuckled and said, "Oh, I explained to Heather that you and I had dated for, what was it ... five years.
"It was seven years, actually," Carol said a little coolly.
"Really!" Nick said in surprise. "Hm, what do you know? But that's ancient history."
"Well," Molly said, "I would think people understand that you're not talking about Carol. I mean, its not like the female character in your book is a 34 year old blond English teacher who was homecoming queen and a former cheerleader. Right?"
"Actually," Nick said, "except for the 34 year old part, that's exactly it. Heather and I met at the high school where she was teaching English. The same high school she had attended and where she had been a cheerleader and the prettiest girl in her class."
Nick finished his sentence with a squeeze of Heather's hand, while Heather silently gushed at Nick's praise.
Molly looked at Nick and Heather and then at Carol. She didn't know if she was going to sick more because of the sugary-sweet interaction between Nick and Heather or because of the look on Carol's face.
"Anyway," Nick continued after a moment, "the only real difference is that Heather is *ten* years younger then Carol."
Molly managed – barely – not to wince at that comment, and saw Carol's eyes narrow slightly. Molly had a brief mental image of laser beams shooting out of Carol's eyes and vaporizing Nick and Heather where they sat.
"Yeah," Heather gushed, "its like you could be my sister or something. Well ... my older sister."
Molly breathed a small sigh of relief as the waiter interrupted the conversation to bring their dinner orders. Nick was having a 16-ounce porterhouse steak, baked potato and mixed vegetables. Heather was content with a Ceasar's salad. Molly had ordered three-cheese ravioli while Carol was having her favorite, meatloaf with mashed potatoes and baby carrots.
The dinner conversation swung between a discourse by Nick and Heather on their two kids –daughter Grace, almost three years old, and son William, ten months old – and a dialogue of Nick's life and accomplishments after leaving Stuckeyville. Heather seemed to hang on every word Nick uttered, a thought that made Carol cringe inwardly.
Carol excused herself at one point to use the ladies' room and Molly quickly joined her. They walked through the crowd and, just before they entered the ladies' room, Carol double-checked to make sure that Heather hadn't followed them.
Once they were inside, Carol exploded, "Do you believe that?!!!"
"Do I believe what?" Molly asked in return.
"Nick!" Carol exclaimed. "He went and found a woman just like me – only *younger*!?!?"
"Well," Molly said, "I don't think that, except for some superficial similarities, she's all that much like you. I mean, I could never be friends with such a vacuous woman. All she does is hang on every word Nick utters!"
"But, Molls," Carol said with regret, "that's how I used to be with Nick for the longest time! Then all his stories got old and boring. Then I realized he was never going to care about me as much as he did himself."
Molly opened her mouth to say something, but Carol barreled on, "Dammit, I shouldn't have agreed to come tonight. I just wanted to show Nick how much I've changed, but I just don't know what to say. I wish Ed could have been here, but he's on his way to Columbus."
"Carol," Molly said when stopped to breathe, "I understand that maybe seeing Nick is bothering you - I mean, you did spend seven years with the man. But you seem to be going way too overboard with this."
Carol blew out her breath quickly and said, "I know, I know! Its just that it gets to me how someone like Nick Stanton – a colossal jackass who only worries about himself – can be so successful and get everything handed to him on a silver platter. A new bestseller on the book shelves ... a beautiful wife. I bet his kids are cute, too. *And* he probably has some big house in Connecticut – complete with a white picket fence around it!"
Molly had been watching Carol as she spoke. Carol was often a gesture driven speaker, but she had been outdoing herself during that diatribe. Her arms were swinging to and fro and she had punctuated her final remark about white picket fences with a sweeping gesture, almost knocking over a small vase on the counter top with silk flowers in it.
Molly stepped closer to put a hand on Carol's arm and said, "Feeling better now, honey?"
"Yeah," Carol said with a little smile. "I guess we better get back to the table before they send in a search party."
Molly nodded, then added, "I hope we can handle the rest of the evening."
Carol just looked at Molly as the left the rest room. As the door to the bathroom closed, a stall door opened and Shirley looked out, a scared look on her face, to see if the coast was clear.
Carol and Molly got back to the table. Nick picked up exactly where he had left off. The venting that Carol had done in the ladies' room was only a temporary help, as Carol started to get upset again. Nick just droned on and on about – what seemed to Carol, his all-too-perfect life, his all-too- perfect wife and his all-too-perfect kids.
But the icing on the cake was when Nick talked about moving to Connecticut and the home he had bought. He even pulled out a picture to show Carol and Molly.
Carol took one look at the photo and Molly could see her just tense up so tight that she thought she could have plucked her arm like a string on a harp. She was trying to figure out why, when Carol passed the picture to her and she understood.
It had been taken Fourth of July and showed Nick, Heather, Grace and William ('Those kids *are* cute!' Molly thought) sitting on the spacious front porch of a large Colonial style house. The photo had been taken from the sidewalk and the large yard was evident as were the mature oak, poplar, and maple trees.
And surrounding the house was a white picket fence.
The waitress had cleaned up the dessert plates and Nick looked to be settling in for the night when Carol turned to Molly and said, "Molly, I'm not feeling so good. Maybe we should go home."
Molly was momentarily surprised, but recovered quickly. She said, "Oh, yeah, Carol, you do look a little under the weather."
Nick looked at Carol and said, "You look fine to me."
Carol looked at Molly pointedly, so Molly said, "No, no. She doesn't look good at all. I'd better get her home."
"Oh, okay," Nick said, who sounded disappointed to be losing his audience.
Molly and Carol stood up. Nick stood as well and said, "It was good to see you again, Carol, Molly," he said.
"You too, Nick," Molly said. "Well, I guess we'll see you on Thursday at the assembly."
"Yeah," Nick said. "I'll see you on Thursday."
Molly and Carol both told Heather they had been pleased to meet her. As Molly and Carol headed for the door they heard Nick call out, "Duncan, another round here, please!" Carol's last glimpse of Nick as the door closed showed a couple of people making their way over to Nick's booth. Carol shook her head.
The Medical Office of Michael Burton, MD
Monday, April 5, 2004
9:15 AM
Mike was reviewing a patient's file when the intercom buzzed.
"Dr. Burton?" the receptionist's voice asked.
"Yes?" Mike responded.
"Stuckeyville Body Shop called," the receptionist said. "They said you could pick the van up this afternoon."
"Okay," Mike answered. "Thanks, Julie."
Mike sighed, remembering the evening two weeks prior when he had pulled into the driveway to see the van's rear bumper with a massive dent in it. According to Nancy, she had come out of the grocery store to find the dent – someone had obviously backed into the parked van and then driven off without leaving a note.
Nancy had been particularly livid over the incident since the van was only two months old. She had ranted and raved about incompetent and inconsiderate drivers for almost 15 minutes. Mike, who had been fairly upset himself when he saw the damage, had actually had to calm her down, thereby releasing his own anger.
Of course, Mike knew the truth now.
Mike shook his head and focused his attention back on Sam Shandly's charts prior to seeing him in the exam room. Shandly had come in for a routine medical exam a couple of weeks before and his blood work had turned up very high blood glucose levels. A check of Shandly's charts indicated a family history of diabetes, which explained Shandly's frequent urination, sudden weight loss, and some other symptoms.
Mike had called Shandly to arrange a consultation to break the news and to go over treatment and control options with him. Mike also wanted to run through some routine checks (weight, blood pressure, etc.) that he could only do in the exam room.
Mike sighed, knowing that it was going to require a *huge* change in Sam's lifestyle – the man had a *serious* "sweet tooth".
Mike closed the chart and walked from his office towards the exam room. He called out, "Wendy, would you have Dr. Smiley meet me in Exam Room Two, please?"
"He's already in there, Dr. Burton," Wendy called back in a strange voice.
As Mike finished walking towards the exam room, he thought back to Rob Smiley's arrival that morning. Smiley had arrived about half past eight dressed in a nice shirt, tie, and a comfortable pair of pants and shoes. He had a large bag over his shoulder. Before Mike could ask about the bag, Smiley had asked if there was somewhere he could "get ready" as he phrased. Mike showed him to his old office and told him that they started seeing patients at nine o'clock sharp (just one of the things that Mike had unconsciously picked up from Dr. Jerome).
Since then, Mike had seen neither hide nor hair of Smiley.
Mike stopped outside the door and took a deep breath. He hated giving patients bad news, but at least they had caught the diabetes at an early stage when controlling it would be easier. He was surprised to hear laughter coming from inside the exam room.
Mike took another deep breath, then opened the door and walked inside. As he stepped inside, he froze.
As Wendy had indicated, Dr. Smiley was in the exam room with Sam Shandly. What she had neglected to mention (and probably the reason she had sounded strange to Mike) was that Smiley was dressed as a clown.
Smiley was wearing a neon blue wig, clown white covered his face, red face paint creating a wide buffer around his mouth, and, of course, a large red clown nose. Although he still had on the shirt, tie, and pants, Smiley now wore a pair of oversize clown shoes (at least two feet long) that were bright green. He wore a doctor's smock in the most eye-dazzling color combination possible. Mike noted a stethoscope in the smock's right pocket as well as a fake one wrapped around Smiley's neck – and it was obvious from Shandly's saturated face that it squirted water.
Mike stood there in severe shock for several seconds. Although he could not speak, his mind was racing. Mike thought about a comment Smiley had made on Friday coupled with Mike's own feeling that he new Smiley's name from somewhere when it hit him like a ton of bricks.
'Smiling Smiley the Clown!!' Mike thought in even more shock. "Damn! I used to watch Smiling Smiley when I was growing up! Rob must be his son. No *wonder* I recognized the name! He's even made up exactly like Smiling Smiley!!'
It took a few seconds for Smiley and Shandly to note that Mike was standing in the door with his mouth hanging open.
"Hey, Dr. Burton!" Sam Shandly said as he suppressed another chuckle.
"Dr. Burton," Smiley said with a ... smile.
"Urg," was all Mike managed at first. He cleared his throat and tried again, "Good morning."
Mike stood in the doorway for another moment looking back and forth between Smiley and Shandly, before he closed his eyes for a moment.
"Mr. Shandly," Mike said, "could I borrow Dr. Smiley for a moment? I'd like to speak to him privately."
"Sure, Doc," Shandly replied.
Mike motioned Smiley out into the hallway. Mike winced as Smiley walked out of the exam room, over-exaggerating his movements in the large clown shoes. Shandly was fascinated, his head bobbing up and down in time to Smiley's steps as he watched Smiley exit the room.
Mike gave a strained smile to Shandly before shutting the door. Mike took a deep breath before turning to face Smiley in the hallway.
Before Mike could say anything, Smiley said, "Hey, Mike. What's up?"
"Dr. Smiley ... Rob ... I ... that is ..." Mike paused then blurted out "What the hell is with the clown suit?"
"I like to set people at ease, Mike," Smiley said. "People tend to stress out coming to see the doctor. I dress up as a clown and people relax. I mean ... who doesn't love a clown?"
Mike clenched his jaw for a moment, then said, "Don't you think you should have informed me of this on Friday – or at least this morning?"
"Nah," Smiley said and grinned, "it was more fun to see your expression when you walked into the exam room."
Down the hallway, Mike could hear Wendy's laughter.
"Look, Mike, it really works," Smiley continued. "Patients relax more around me. Hey, it worked for Patch Adams, didn't it?"
Mike still wasn't sure what he was going to do ... and he never did find out, because he heard someone exclaim from behind him, "What the high hell is going on in this place?"
Mike paled and closed his eyes in panic. 'NNNOOO! Not now, please ... not now!!' But as he turned around, Mike knew that his most fervent prayers wouldn't save him.
Standing in the hallway, hands on his hips and glaring at Mike and Dr. Smiley, was Dr. Jerome. Although he wasn't wearing his doctor's smock any longer, he still had on an outfit that he would have worn at the office - slacks, shirt, tie, sweater, and jacket.
As Mike completed his turn, Dr. Jerome said, "Oh, Dr. Burton! When I saw a clown standing in the hallway I thought for sure that you had finally heard your true calling."
"Walter," Mike said, "I ..."
"Walter?!!" Dr. Jerome bellowed. "Just because I was forced to turn this practice over to you before I think you were ready does not mean that we are on a first name basis, *Doctor* Burton!" Dr. Jerome had said the word "Doctor" with contempt.
Mike gritted his teeth in frustration, then said, "I'm sorry. Dr. Jerome, let me explain..."
"Oh," Dr. Jerome interrupted with biting sarcasm, "no need to explain. It's obvious what's going on here!"
"It is?" Mike asked.
"Of course it is, Dr. Burton," Dr. Jerome said. "You decided to look for a new medical partner and immediately went for someone who was as much of a clown as you are."
"Excuse me, Dr. Jerome," Smiley attempted to say, but Dr. Jerome cut him off.
"Zip it, Clarabell!!" Dr. Jerome roared.
Dr. Jerome then whirled on Mike and, with a raised finger, thundered, "I realize that you are several clowns short of a full clown car, but I did not retire and hand this practice over to you so you could turn it into some sort of circus. The next time I stop in, I had better not see Chuckles (Dr. Jerome jerked his thumb in the direction of Smiling Dr. Smiley)! Do I make myself clear?"
"Yes, Dr. Jerome," Mike said instinctively.
Dr. Jerome glared at both men individually for a moment, then turned and stormed out. Dr. Smiley looked at Mike, who simply shrugged. Dr. Smiley's shoulders slumped as he turned away and headed back towards Mike's old office. As he got to the office door, he removed the wig with a defeated tug.
Mike was still standing there, listening to Wendy's raucous laughter from the front desk, when he remembered that Dr. Jerome really didn't have the authority to dictate who Mike chose as a partner. With a sigh, Mike decided it was for the best anyway.
***
The Pie Shop
Monday, April 5, 2004
12:30 PM
Mike and Ed were sitting at the pie shop, a big burger with fries on a plate in front of each of them, and cokes off to the side.
Ed was laughing so hard, he actually had tears in his eyes as he listened to Mike recount his morning with Drs. Smiley and Jerome. Mike did *not* look amused at Ed's laughter.
"Oh, man," Ed said as his laughter finally started to taper off. "Smiling Smiley! I remember watching him on Channel 4 when we were growing up. He was great!"
"Yeah, Ed," Mike said a little caustically, "he may have been great as a kid's show host on television, but not as a doctor!"
"Right, right," Ed tried – and failed – to say seriously. It might have been the big grin on his face that caused him to fail so miserably at it.
'I've had enough of this,' Mike thought. He took a big bite of his burger, followed it with a couple of fries for good measure and silently chewed for a moment.
"So, Ed," Mike said deliberately, "how come you haven't asked Carol yet? Getting cold feet?"
Ed's smiled disappeared in an instant and he glared at Mike for a moment.
"No," Ed replied, "I haven't gotten cold feet. You know how I had gotten interrupted the other night?"
"Yeah," Mike said, glad to be talking about someone else's problems for a moment, "some screw-up with Phil or something."
"Right," Ed said. "Well, I tried to ask Carol again on Friday around lunchtime. I was all ready to do it, when..."
Mike interrupted, "Not another cell phone call!?"
"No," Ed replied after a sip of his coke, "I left the cell phone in the Explorer. No, this time it was Molly. She paged Carol to her office."
"You're not getting any breaks, are you," Mike said. Ed simply nodded as he bit into his burger.
Mike continued, "So why didn't you do it over the weekend?"
"It just didn't seem like I could find the right moment," Ed confessed. "I mean, I could have done it at any point, there were plenty of opportunities. We were home alone most of the weekend, but Carol was acting really weird all weekend."
"Weird?" Mike asked as he shoved a handful of fried in his mouth. "Weird how?"
"Its hard to define," Ed said in frustration. "I could just tell that something was on her mind and bothering her, but she kept on telling me that nothing was wrong. She was a little distant in fact."
"Hmph," Mike said around another mouthful of burger.
Ed looked at Mike for a moment, then said, "What do you mean, 'Hmph'?"
"Nothing," Mike replied after he has swallowed.
"Come on, Mike," Ed persisted. "You must have meant something by it otherwise you wouldn't have said, 'Hmph'."
"Ed," Mike said, "sometimes a 'Hmph' is just a 'Hmph'."
"Oh," Ed said and took another bite of his burger. "Hmph."
"Have you asked Molly?" Mike asked.
"No," Ed answered. "I don't really want to do any more end runs around Carol. I'm sure Molly would know, but I've gotten Molly – and myself – into too much trouble by going that route. I think I'll just have to wait until Carol tells me."
"You're really prepared to wait that long, huh?" Mike asked after a moment.
"Funny, Mike," Ed said sarcastically while Mike just grinned.
The two finished their lunches and settled their bill. On their way out the door, Ed looked at his watch and said, "Damn, I'm going to have to hustle. I've got to meet Mayor Kendricks at one o'clock and I still need to get some stuff from StuckeyBowl. I should have just brought it with me."
"Alright, buddy," Mike said and watched Ed start to head off. Mike suddenly remembered something and called out "Ed!"
Ed stopped and turned around, eyebrows raised inquiringly.
"I almost forgot," Mike said, "Nancy wanted to know if you and Carol were free for dinner tomorrow night."
"Not me," Ed said. "I'm heading to Columbus tonight on this stuff for Mayor Kendricks. I won't be back until late Wednesday night. Carol should be free though. Have Nancy call her. Gotta run."
Ed turned and walked away at a rapid clip while Mike himself started to head back to his office.
'Now ... I've got to set up some other interviews,' Mike thought with frustration.
***
Stuckeyville High School
Monday, April 5, 2004
3:00 PM
Carol straightened her desk up after she finished grading some papers. She always liked to have everything neatly in its place. She chuckled softly to herself, knowing that she had to bite her tongue at home frequently. It wasn't like Ed was a slob, but he did have a few annoying habits that she wanted to break him of – like leaving the cap off the toothpaste! To deal with that, she simply made sure that she brushed her teeth after him and put the cap on herself.
She smiled again to herself, knowing that for every one of Ed's little idiosyncrasies she compensated for, there was probably one of hers that Ed compensated for. She felt a familiar warm feeling when she thought how *GOOD* her relationship with Ed had become since they'd gotten together. The friendship was still there – they hung out, joked and laughed together frequently. But she *really* liked the other side to their relationship – the quiet times curled up in his arms, kissing him, looking into his big blue eyes and losing herself, and (with a slight blush) the sex!!
As she collected her coat and purse, she sighed.
'I should just talk to Ed about what's bothering me,' she thought. 'Except that I don't know *why* its bothering me so much that Nick is married and has a couple of kids. I'm with Ed, who is *so* much better than Nick!'
Carol walked out of her classroom and down the hall towards Molly's office. She figured maybe Molly could help her understand what was bothering her so much about this. She walked in to the main office and looked around. The administrative staff had left for the day and the door to Molly's office was closed, which surprised Carol a bit.
She could hear voices from inside Molly's office and figured she must be meeting with a teacher or maybe a parent. She had just decided to leave when the door to Molly's office opened and Molly started to walk out, saying "Hold on a second, Ni...". Molly stopped in mid-word and blurted "Carol!" Molly winced as soon as she'd said it.
'Please!' Molly thought to herself, 'please do not let this happen.'
But it was too late. Molly heard movement from inside her office as she made her way over to her secretary's desk and picked up a file. A voice from inside Molly's office said, "Carol? That wouldn't be Carol Vessey would it?"
Nick Stanton stepped into view from inside Molly's office. Nick hadn't changed one bit. He was wearing his trademark outfit – a comfortable pair of jeans, Oxford shirt, and a tan blazer. Still good looking with his handsome smile plastered onto his face.
Carol completely froze in shock. Molly winced again and thought '*This* is going to be interesting!'
"It is Carol Vessey!" Nick said as he stepped out of Molly's office. "Well, well. Small world isn't it Carol?"
"Um," Carol started, then stopped long enough to swallow through a suddenly dry mouth. "Yes, I guess it is, Nick. How are you?"
As Carol asked the question she looked at Molly accusingly. Molly shrugged apologetically, but remained silent for the moment.
Nick replied, "Oh, I'm doing great, Carol! How about yourself?"
"Uh, good. Real good," Carol said somewhat lamely.
'Yeah, right,' Carol thought, 'no where near as good as you though!'
"Molly and I," Nick said, "were just going over my comments for the school assembly on Thursday. I was pleasantly surprised to find out that Molly was principal. Nice to see that things change around here."
"Yeah," Carol said. "Molls is a great principal."
"So, Carol," Nick said, "what's up with you? Still teaching English to the uneducatable teenagers?"
"Well," Carol said, "I wouldn't characterize them as uneducatable, but yes, I'm still teaching English here."
"Good," Nick said with a slight condescending tone. "So. Married? Kids?"
"Um, no," Carol said, unsure why she was answering his questions, "to both."
"Really," Nick asked in mild surprise. "I figured after you and I split that lawyer fellow ... what's his name ... Fred?"
"Ed," both Molly and Carol corrected.
"Right ... Ed," Nick said with a snap of his fingers. "I figured you and he would get together and have a bunch of little ones running around by now."
"Um, no," Carol said. "We *are* living together, but haven't gotten married and no kids."
'Dammit,' Carol mentally said to herself. 'Why am I answering such personal questions. Its none of Nick's business! Besides, its not that Ed and I don't want to get married. It's just that he hasn't asked me yet... not that THAT means anything ... he's probably waiting for the right time ... NOT that there's a wrong time or ...'
"Well," Nick said with slight superior smile and a penetrating look, "I guess some things *don't* change around here."
"What does that mean," Carol asked a little hotly.
"Oh," Nick said, "I've been gone three and a half years and you're still in pretty much the same place as then. Teaching English at the high school, living with a guy, but unmarried and with no kids. I just find it interesting."
Molly realized that she had better step in before things got worse and said, "Anyway, Nick, here's the agenda for the assembly, outlining the speaking order. Why don't you look it over and let me know if you have any questions."
Molly handed Nick a copy of the agenda, which he took and folded before slipping into his blazer.
"Say," Nick said, oblivious to the hostility he had created in Carol, "why don't we all get together for dinner. We could all catch up on things."
Molly and Carol looked at one another, then Carol said, "I don't think I can, Nick. Sorry."
"Oh, come on," Nick said, turning on the charm. "I haven't been back to Stuckeyville in a long time. I'd love to get some dinner at the Smiling Goat and talk. It would be just a shame if I had to do this on my own."
Molly sighed. She'd been told by the school board to extend every courtesy to Nick. Seems there was a rumor that Nick might make a financial contribution to the high school library and the school board wanted that rumor to become reality.
"Sounds like fun, Nick," Molly said with forced enthusiasm.
Carol's head whipped around to look at Molly. When Nick looked back at Carol with raised eyebrows, Molly gave Carol another apologetic shrug.
"And what about you, Carol," Nick asked. "Come on, no hard feelings. I'll even pay for dinner."
Carol mind reeled with all the thoughts flashing through her brain. But most of all, she wanted a chance to make Nick eat his words. Carol thought, ''some things *don't* change around here', my ass!'
"Okay," Carol said, surprising Molly so much that Molly stumbled as she moved around a desk.
"Great!" Nick said. "How about seven o'clock then at the Goat."
Both women agreed and Nick said, "Great! I'll see you then."
Nick walked out of the main office and down the hall.
"I can't believe," Molly exclaimed, "that you agreed to go to dinner with Nick!"
"Yeah," Carol said in a somewhat subdued voice, "me either. But that crack about some things not changing really bugged me and I want a chance to ..."
"A chance to what, Carol," Molly asked.
"I don't know," Carol answered. "I guess a chance to prove him wrong. I'm not the same woman I was when I was with him. I don't care *if* the circumstances that I'm in are similar to what they were three and half years ago. Things have changed!"
Molly didn't say anything, but she could tell that Carol was trying to convince herself as much as she was trying to convince Molly of that last statement.
***
The Smiling Goat
Monday, April 5, 2004
7:00 PM
Molly and Carol walked into the Smiling Goat and looked around. In the dark interior, they spotted Nick Stanton at the infamous "Nick Stanton" booth; the booth with a plaque highlighting that Nick had written one of his books at that very spot. A crowd was gathered around the booth and it was obvious that Nick was in the midst of one of his stories.
"Which story do you think he's telling," Molly asked Carol.
"Probably the one about the hat," Carol replied after a moment's thought.
They moved closer to the booth and stood at the back of the crowd.
"Now this guy was a biker," Nick was saying, "back when being a biker meant something, ya know what I'm saying? The kind of guy who'd just as soon beat you with a pipe as shake your hand. But it was my favorite hat and, damn it, I wanted it back!"
"So I looked him right in the eye," Nick continued, "and I said, 'I don't know what I'm gonna tell my mother when she finds out that I let a biker steal her hat!' And the guy's eyes widen and he rips the thing of his head and he says, 'This is a lady's hat? I ain't wearin' no lady's hat!'"
The crowd laughed loudly. Someone in the crowd called out, "So did he give it back?"
Nick pulled the hat out and put it on his head, "That answer your question?"
More laughter, then someone in the crowd said, "That was great!"
Nick laughed, then he turned to a woman sitting at the table and said, "Sorry baby, gotta keep my people happy."
The woman – a slim, very attractive blond – shook her head and said enthusiastically, "Oh, please, you know I love your stories..."
Carol was having a series of flashbacks listening to Nick and the woman – most of them unpleasant.
Nick spotted Carol and Molly in the back of the crowd and said, "Well, folks, it seems like my dinner companions have arrived, so if you'll excuse us." Nick stood up.
The crowd dispersed slowly, paying various compliments to Nick, who soaked them up like a dehydrated sponge.
Carol and Molly were finally able to make it to the table, where Nick introduced them to his wife, Heather. Heather was VERY attractive. As she stood to welcome Molly and Carol, it was obvious she was nearly identical in height to Carol. Her blond hair was about shoulder length, she had flawless white skin, brown eyes, and a full mouth. Heather and Carol looked very much alike, except that Heather was younger – and maybe a little more 'pretty' in a classic, feminine sense.
Molly and Carol shared a looked in the dim light of the Goat before they sat down. They both knew they were thinking the same thing, 'Nick never said anything about having dinner with him *and* his wife!' Molly could tell that it was going to be a long night for Carol.
The all sat down and quickly looked over the menus.
As the waiter left with their dinner orders Nick looked around and said, "You know, its good to be back. I guess I've missed the Goat more than I thought."
"Well," Molly said, "you must have realized how much you missed Stuckeyville to write a book about it."
Nick's wife looked confused, as did Nick for a moment. He said, "Have either of you read 'Small Town People'?"
"Um, no," Molly said hesitantly, "I guess we haven't. Why?"
"Because its not about Stuckeyville," Nick said.
"But what about the dedication," Molly said.
"That was my agent's idea," Nick said. "I mentioned to him at one point that if I hadn't left Stuckeyville then I wouldn't have moved to Humblertown, Connecticut – another small town – and I wouldn't have met Heather. He thought it would make for great irony to thank the small town I left in a book about the small town I found everything I was looking for in."
Nick just looked at the shocked expressions on Molly and Carol's faces. He continued, "Of course, he and I never expected for Stuckeyville City Council to give me an award for the dedication. I guess they thought the book was about Stuckeyville too. Of course, there are a lot of similarities, so it could be easy to make that mistake."
Nick had a sudden thought and said, "Hey! Wait! You don't think people are thinking I'm talking about Carol in the book do you? I mean, if they think I'm talking about Stuckeyville ..."
Carol looked at Nick in surprise. He chuckled and said, "Oh, I explained to Heather that you and I had dated for, what was it ... five years.
"It was seven years, actually," Carol said a little coolly.
"Really!" Nick said in surprise. "Hm, what do you know? But that's ancient history."
"Well," Molly said, "I would think people understand that you're not talking about Carol. I mean, its not like the female character in your book is a 34 year old blond English teacher who was homecoming queen and a former cheerleader. Right?"
"Actually," Nick said, "except for the 34 year old part, that's exactly it. Heather and I met at the high school where she was teaching English. The same high school she had attended and where she had been a cheerleader and the prettiest girl in her class."
Nick finished his sentence with a squeeze of Heather's hand, while Heather silently gushed at Nick's praise.
Molly looked at Nick and Heather and then at Carol. She didn't know if she was going to sick more because of the sugary-sweet interaction between Nick and Heather or because of the look on Carol's face.
"Anyway," Nick continued after a moment, "the only real difference is that Heather is *ten* years younger then Carol."
Molly managed – barely – not to wince at that comment, and saw Carol's eyes narrow slightly. Molly had a brief mental image of laser beams shooting out of Carol's eyes and vaporizing Nick and Heather where they sat.
"Yeah," Heather gushed, "its like you could be my sister or something. Well ... my older sister."
Molly breathed a small sigh of relief as the waiter interrupted the conversation to bring their dinner orders. Nick was having a 16-ounce porterhouse steak, baked potato and mixed vegetables. Heather was content with a Ceasar's salad. Molly had ordered three-cheese ravioli while Carol was having her favorite, meatloaf with mashed potatoes and baby carrots.
The dinner conversation swung between a discourse by Nick and Heather on their two kids –daughter Grace, almost three years old, and son William, ten months old – and a dialogue of Nick's life and accomplishments after leaving Stuckeyville. Heather seemed to hang on every word Nick uttered, a thought that made Carol cringe inwardly.
Carol excused herself at one point to use the ladies' room and Molly quickly joined her. They walked through the crowd and, just before they entered the ladies' room, Carol double-checked to make sure that Heather hadn't followed them.
Once they were inside, Carol exploded, "Do you believe that?!!!"
"Do I believe what?" Molly asked in return.
"Nick!" Carol exclaimed. "He went and found a woman just like me – only *younger*!?!?"
"Well," Molly said, "I don't think that, except for some superficial similarities, she's all that much like you. I mean, I could never be friends with such a vacuous woman. All she does is hang on every word Nick utters!"
"But, Molls," Carol said with regret, "that's how I used to be with Nick for the longest time! Then all his stories got old and boring. Then I realized he was never going to care about me as much as he did himself."
Molly opened her mouth to say something, but Carol barreled on, "Dammit, I shouldn't have agreed to come tonight. I just wanted to show Nick how much I've changed, but I just don't know what to say. I wish Ed could have been here, but he's on his way to Columbus."
"Carol," Molly said when stopped to breathe, "I understand that maybe seeing Nick is bothering you - I mean, you did spend seven years with the man. But you seem to be going way too overboard with this."
Carol blew out her breath quickly and said, "I know, I know! Its just that it gets to me how someone like Nick Stanton – a colossal jackass who only worries about himself – can be so successful and get everything handed to him on a silver platter. A new bestseller on the book shelves ... a beautiful wife. I bet his kids are cute, too. *And* he probably has some big house in Connecticut – complete with a white picket fence around it!"
Molly had been watching Carol as she spoke. Carol was often a gesture driven speaker, but she had been outdoing herself during that diatribe. Her arms were swinging to and fro and she had punctuated her final remark about white picket fences with a sweeping gesture, almost knocking over a small vase on the counter top with silk flowers in it.
Molly stepped closer to put a hand on Carol's arm and said, "Feeling better now, honey?"
"Yeah," Carol said with a little smile. "I guess we better get back to the table before they send in a search party."
Molly nodded, then added, "I hope we can handle the rest of the evening."
Carol just looked at Molly as the left the rest room. As the door to the bathroom closed, a stall door opened and Shirley looked out, a scared look on her face, to see if the coast was clear.
Carol and Molly got back to the table. Nick picked up exactly where he had left off. The venting that Carol had done in the ladies' room was only a temporary help, as Carol started to get upset again. Nick just droned on and on about – what seemed to Carol, his all-too-perfect life, his all-too- perfect wife and his all-too-perfect kids.
But the icing on the cake was when Nick talked about moving to Connecticut and the home he had bought. He even pulled out a picture to show Carol and Molly.
Carol took one look at the photo and Molly could see her just tense up so tight that she thought she could have plucked her arm like a string on a harp. She was trying to figure out why, when Carol passed the picture to her and she understood.
It had been taken Fourth of July and showed Nick, Heather, Grace and William ('Those kids *are* cute!' Molly thought) sitting on the spacious front porch of a large Colonial style house. The photo had been taken from the sidewalk and the large yard was evident as were the mature oak, poplar, and maple trees.
And surrounding the house was a white picket fence.
The waitress had cleaned up the dessert plates and Nick looked to be settling in for the night when Carol turned to Molly and said, "Molly, I'm not feeling so good. Maybe we should go home."
Molly was momentarily surprised, but recovered quickly. She said, "Oh, yeah, Carol, you do look a little under the weather."
Nick looked at Carol and said, "You look fine to me."
Carol looked at Molly pointedly, so Molly said, "No, no. She doesn't look good at all. I'd better get her home."
"Oh, okay," Nick said, who sounded disappointed to be losing his audience.
Molly and Carol stood up. Nick stood as well and said, "It was good to see you again, Carol, Molly," he said.
"You too, Nick," Molly said. "Well, I guess we'll see you on Thursday at the assembly."
"Yeah," Nick said. "I'll see you on Thursday."
Molly and Carol both told Heather they had been pleased to meet her. As Molly and Carol headed for the door they heard Nick call out, "Duncan, another round here, please!" Carol's last glimpse of Nick as the door closed showed a couple of people making their way over to Nick's booth. Carol shook her head.