It's raining again
Oh no, my love's at an end.
Oh no, it's raining again
and you know it's hard to pretend…

-Supertramp

*`~

"Beautiful weather we've been having, no?"

"Hai; it is beautiful."

Misharei stared down at the dusty road, ignoring the two people walking in front of him. He and Kamatari had been traveling with Dominick for a week. The two older men were on good terms, but the teen was left out. Dominick made very few attempts to talk to him -probably because Misha understood very little English- and seemed to dislike him a lot.

The two were chattering together in broken English, discussing the weather. Every now and then the boy would understand snatches of the conversation, but he felt like they were ignoring him. This is terrible…I've hardly gotten more than a kiss in the past week. I can't stand it. This isn't fair!

Apparently, Dominick had spoken too soon. As they continued on, the weather changed drastically. Dark clouds rolled across the horizon and a strong wind began to blow.

This weather is perfect for the mood I'm in. They seem so happy, talking and laughing about things and not including me just because I don't understand. Kamatari, he could be explaining what they're talking about, but he is ignoring me too. But I suppose…I suppose if this is what it will take to mend his heart, I will have to let him go…Even if it hurts…

Even if…

…My heart gets broken.

Kamatari looked up at the gathering clouds. He wrinkled his nose when a rain drop landed on his forehead. Rain was not a good thing. Not when one was wearing silk. He frowned slightly. The weather had been very nice for the past seven days. Traveling with Dominick-san had been pleasant, except Misha didn't seem happy at all.

He glanced over his shoulder at the teenager. Misha was walking with his eyes glued to the ground, his sandals flapping as he trod. This was very un-Misha-like. Usually, he had his head held up high, taking in everything around him. I wonder what's wrong…

"Is the little boy okay?" Dominick's gaze followed Kamatari's. The kid had been very quiet and he didn't seem like the kind to keep quiet. Especially not after his outburst that first day. He wondered what exactly the relationship between Kamatari and Misharei was. It seemed that they were very affectionate with one another.

"I told you not to call him that." Kamatari reminded the other man. It was at that moment that it began to pour rain. He pushed his bangs from his eyes as he stopped walking to wait for Misha to catch up. "Genki dêsu ka?"

Misha looked up, startled. His loose hair was plastered to his forehead; rivers of water ran down his face. Or were those tears? Something about the boy had been off lately. Was he crying? There was anguish in his eyes. "What's wrong, Anata?" Gentle fingers pushed back the boy's hair, allowing his whole face to be seen.

Misha's chin trembled. He looked into the eyes of Kamatari, so full of love and compassion, and tears overflowed from his eyes. "Hold me…Onegai shimasu…I don't want to be alone…" He stared up at his beloved, his hands limp at his sides, tears dripping from his chin.

"You're not alone." Kamatari said softly, "I'm right here. I've been ignoring you, haven't I?" He wrapped his arms around the young man, holding him close, "Gomen nasai…Forgive me, Dearest. I'm so sorry."

"It's just…I…I…I don't want to lose you…" He whispered, "I don't…" He buried his face in the front of his beloved's kimono, unable to go on. "Ai shiteru…Itsumo, ai shiteru…"

"Ara…Don't cry…I'm sorry. Sumimasen…My darling dearest one, please don't be sad." He lifted the boy into his arms, hugging him tightly. "I hate to see you cry."

This caused him to cry harder. He hid his face among the wet silk, sniffling and hiccupping. He was so distraught and confused that he couldn't even speak. He wouldn't have known what to say, had he been able to speak. He simply remained there in Kamatari's arms, sobbing.

"Look at me, Anata." Kamatari said gently, "Look at me; don't hide your face." He placed two fingers under Misha's chin, lifting his face so that they were looking at one another. The teen was bleary-eyed, his face red and wet with tears. It broke Kamatari's heart to see him like that. He pushed back Misha's hair, ready to kiss him on the forehead, when he realized…"You're burning up, Misha!" He exclaimed in alarm.

"Chaa…" He whispered sleepily, laying his head back on Kamatari's shoulder.

"Why didn't you tell me, Darling? You're sick…This being in the rain isn't going to be good for you…" He fretted, "You need to go to bed and right away."

"Mmm…" The boy mumbled incoherently, his arms loosely around Kamatari's neck. "…I'm sleepy…"

"You go to sleep. I'll take care of you. I promise that I'll make sure you're okay. Because I love you more than anything." He looked up from his drowsy companion, meeting Dominick's dark eyes. "We need to find a place to stop, Dominick-san. Misha is sick."

The Yugoslavian man regarded him for a moment. The conversation between the two had been entirely in Japanese. He had no clue what was going on. Something seems to be wrong with the little boy. She's really worried about him. I wonder how much she loves him…Suppose they're lovers? Ha…that's ridiculous. He's no more than a child… "Right then. The next place we come to we can stop."

"Domo arigato. I thank you. If anything were to happen to Misha, I would be terribly lonely."

"You don't have to worry about that. You've got me, no?" His dark eyebrows went up and half a smile crossed his face.

Kamatari looked at him for a moment, a peculiar look on his face. "You are not my Misha." He said somewhat crossly, "It would be entirely different." He looked back down at the boy, who gazed sadly up at him. "Dai-suki, Anata." He said softly, stroking back the young man's damp hair, kissing him tenderly on his forehead.

"Chaa…" Misha's eyes closed slowly, settling into Kamatari's arms. I'm so sleepy. I just want to sleep for the rest of my life…And not have to worry about anything…

*`~

"Tell me, how are you and the little boy connected?" Dominick was watching as Kamatari flitted around the hotel room, taking care of Misharei. The boy lay in a restless sleep, tossing and turning among the sheets and moaning softly.

"He is an orphan. I rescued him from a life of poverty when he was a child. And we have been together ever since." Kamatari looked up from mopping the sweat off his friend's forehead, "He is my darling one; my dearest. The most wonderful friend a person could ask for. My Misha is a free spirit. I want to live the way he does. I want to be unrestrained and happy as he is."

"He doesn't seem very happy." Dominick commented off-handedly as he ran a hand roguishly through his dark hair.

That's because of you…These words were on the tip of Kamatari's tongue. But he held his tongue and frowned lightly. He is jealous of you, Dominick-san…He thinks I'm falling in love with you. How wrong he is…"He doesn't like it here in America. He misses Kyoto and all of the people he knew. He and Misao-chan became quite good friends in the month they knew one another. He was sad to leave her."

"Ah." Dominick nodded slowly, "I understand. I left family and friends back in Yugoslavia. This Misao…She is some one he loved, no?"

"No. She wasn't. She was merely his friend, some one whom he enjoyed spending time with. Misao-chan has a man she loves very much; much in the way Misha loves me." He smiled sadly down at the boy, still sleeping fitfully, "Ai shiteru, Anata." He whispered.

Dominick looked at him curiously. What is she saying? I wish she wouldn't do that…I hate not understanding. Women are hard enough to understand as it is. He furrowed his brow.

"I'm going to get fresh water. His fever still hasn't broken. I worry about him so…" He rose from the bed, his hand lingering on the young man's flushed cheek, then he looked up at Dominick. "If he wakes up, tell him I will be right back, onegai shimasu."

"All right." The man agreed with a nod. He watched as Kamatari sauntered away, his eyes following the 'woman' out of the room. She is so sexy…Then he looked over at Misharei where he was curled up on the bed, clutching a blanket between his fingers. What is so special about that boy? Why is he such an amazing person? What about that child is so wonderful? I just don't get it…

"Chaa…Kamatari…" The boy rolled over, grabbing the sheet again, his fingers clenching. Sweat rolled off his face and he was frowning intently. "Don't leave me…I need…Shishio…I hate…Onegai…shimasu…" He curled up, shrinking down into a corner of the bed.

I wonder what he's dreaming about…Can't understand a word he says. Strange child…

Suddenly, the boy jerked awake. He sat up, tangled in the blankets, nearly falling off the bed in the process. "Kamatari! Kamatari, kare wa doku ni imasu ka?" Tears ran down his face and he rubbed his eyes. "Please…Where is Kamatari?" He looked up, his face drawn and pathetic.

"She went out to get more water. She's getting sick of taking care of you, little boy." The man sneered. "You're too much trouble."

Misha blinked, wiping tears from his eyes. "Nani?" He whispered, his voice shaky. What had he said? He was speaking too fast, saying words the boy didn't understand. He wanted to tell him to slow down and speak clearly, but didn't know how. More tears spilled down his cheeks. His head hurt, his chest ached and he wanted to go home.

"Misha!"

He looked up, his eyes wide and startled. He was sitting on the bed, the sheets twisted around his thin body. His face was flushed, his yukata hanging loosely from his frail form. "…Itoshii…" His face crumbled and he burst into fresh tears.

Kamatari set the bucket on the floor, crossing the small room to the bed. "What's wrong, Anata? What happened?" He drew the boy into his arms, holding him close, "Tell me…Please don't cry."

"…Never leave me; chaa…" The boy sobbed, "I had a terrible nightmare…That you had killed yourself over Shishio and I was alone…Please, promise you will never leave." His arms were wrapped tightly around the older man, as if he were holding on for dear life.

"I won't go anywhere." He rubbed Misha's back soothingly, "I'm not going to leave you. My darling…My dearest, I love you. Remember that I will always love you. You are the only thing I have ever done right in my life, Anata. I'm not going to leave you now."

"When…" The boy sniffled, "When I woke up and you weren't there…It scared me more than anything."

"Gomen nasai. You're still feverish. I wanted to get fresh water. Believe me, Darling," Kamatari's chin rested on the top of the boy's head, "I had no desire to leave you."

"Am…Am I very much trouble for you?" Misha could feel his friend's heart pounding within his chest. He knew deep down that they belonged together; that their hearts beat as one, but wasn't quite sure if Kamatari agreed. He pulled away, looking up and into his companion's eyes. I search for the peace in your eyes…He thought sadly, but they're as empty as paradise…

"You're no trouble at all." Kamatari buried his face back in the young man's hair, "You could never be any trouble to me." He paused, "I would kiss you, but I don't want to get sick too."

I don't believe you…

I want to.

But I don't. "Can you hold me in your lap? The very way you did when I was younger…When you stroked my hair and I used your chest as a pillow."

"Mochiron…Anything you want, Darling." Slender fingers ran over the young man's silky locks and soft lips roamed across his forehead. He settled into Kamatari's embrace, trying to forget all his misery and his current state of confusion.

*`~

AN: Just because few of you know…Dominick Kresock was a real person. He was, in fact, my great-great-grandfather. He came to America from Yugoslavia in the 1890's and lived in northern Pennsylvania. I know this story would take place sometime in the 1870's (don't know the *exact* year) and Dom-san would still be a kid (or possibly not even born then…^^;;) but I didn't have any relations here in the 1870's and I wanted them to meet some one I'm related to. Cool, ne?