It was like night and day.
In school, Sousuke was a total disaster, and Kaname was master of all she surveyed.
But, put stealthy clothes on Sousuke…… blacken his face with make-up…… and put a weapon in his hand…… and he becomes a god. In contrast, in that setting, Kaname becomes a fish out of water.
Throughout the entire operation, she spent more time watching Sousuke than she did paying attention to her surroundings or the other two Mitrhil agents. Melissa, as sharp as ever, caught on fairly soon. Kurz, ever the egotist and optimist, merely thought that Kaname found him sexually intimidating.
Sousuke was confident.
Everything he did had a purpose. One thing led seamlessly into another. His ability to react on the fly was nothing short of phenomenal.
Kaname began to understand why someone his age was so highly valued by Mithril. The simple things that he did on that comical little adventure impressed her more than all that he had done after climbing into that RK-92 in Khanka.
She didn't want to think about that now.
The blue-haired girl learned that the otaku things Sousuke spouted often contained great wisdom.
'The preparation for a military operation is often much more important than the actual execution of the plan.'
That statement was proven many times over that night. It didn't hurt that the three Mithril soldiers were in a league of there own; but, it was the utter simplicity and daring panache of the planning that made the difference.
Unnoticed, Sousuke slipped into the Inaba household during dinner. He reconnoitered...... recorded conversations….. planned the best ways of entrance and egress…... and planted a timer attached to a small canister of gas.
Melissa had wanted to use a knock out agent, but Sousuke would not agree to that plan.
'That would be an attack on their persons. They have done nothing to deserve that.'
Kaname had been of a mind to argue, but didn't. There was a breathtaking nobility in the way the young soldier had stood up for the rights of people who had no meaning to him, simply because it was the right thing to do.
'Absolute power corrupts absolutely.'
He had quoted that to her once. It annoyed her at the time. Now, however, she was impressed by his restraint.
Kurz had sided with Sousuke. His young companion's plan had a number of things going for it.
There would be no assault on persons. There would be no irreparable damage to the home. There would be an opportunity Weber The Magnificent to be on center stage again, if only for a little while.
Kaname had a flashback, remembering the day that Kurz had affected an accent and pretended to be a foreigner needing Kyouko's and her assistance. His performance this time was much better.
No shots were fired. No bombs went off. No exotic equipment left the safe house. No watches were synchronized.
None of those were needed.
The delay of a few hours proved worthwhile: A simple white Mithril van was brought to a lettering shop, and an appropriate sign and logo were airbrushed on its sides. Instructions called into a knowledgeable document and license maker led to the creation of the necessary fake I.D. and Industry Alert papers.
"It's ethyl-methyl-poly-vinyl-chloro-dextro-craminate," Kurz had told Mizuke's father.
"We have had word of a tanker truck accident to the east. If you smell anything strange in your house, evacuate immediately, then head west. Call this number when you are at least two miles away."
The spiel had the man sweating. Mizuke and her mother hugged each other, frightened by what they are hearing.
"Do not try to rescue pets or belongings," Kurz added. "Sufficient expose can lead to permanent pulmonary damage and impotence." That last comment had the man considering the benefit of going on their family vacation immediately.
The act was perfect. Kurz even had a small sample of the gas that Sousuke had smuggled into the house.
"This is a very similar compound. It is comparable in smell, but harmless in this small amount. Here, everybody take a whiff."
Kurz' act earned him a kiss on the cheek from Kaname, who had been listening to every word in the second Mithril van.
He was on cloud nine for exactly ten seconds after that show of appreciation.
"Well, Weber. You made one tragic error." Melissa's look was very intense.
Kurz gulped. "Sis, it was perfect. I..." The long-haired blond tried to think of anything he slipped up on.
"That's right. That's my point exactly. You can do something right. Now, I'm going to expect that again in the future!" No one could tell whether or not Melissa was joking.
Melissa handed a wad of bills to Sousuke. Kaname did likewise.
A bet is a bet…
"I had faith in you," Sousuke said. "I do not like to bet; but, it was an order."
Melissa smiled.
Kurz pouted. Then, his giant grin returned.
"So, how about sharing you winnings with Kurzeroo? After all, none of this would be possible with out the one and only."
"Sorry. I cannot. Orders." Sousuke's deadpan delivery had Melissa in stitches.
After that, it was just a matter of waiting.
At the appointed hour, Melissa flicked a switch, sending out a quick pulsed signal. The receiver on the device Sousuke planted received the signal... released a powerful spring... and punctured the gas canister. Moments later, screaming could be heard on the microphones Sousuke had left behind.
Soon, the family car came barreling out of the driveway, knocking down a mailbox and sending a group of full garbage cans careening down the street.
It was time to get to work.
The three soldiers dumped the crates of squid on the front steps, across the foyer, and throughout the adjoining kitchen. Kaname kept one crate for her own personal use. She banged her knees innumerable times, lugging the hefty box up the stairs. But, she didn't care.
Payback time!
Squid found their way into Mizuki's futon. Purses and pockets overflowed with a bounty of squid. With some work, minced squid added an avantgarde character to the girl's perfumes, body rinses, and shampoo.
It took little experimentation to learn that shoes make excellent squid-holders.
Leaving the room, Kaname caught sight of Mizuki's extensive collection of stuffed animals. They looked so lonely. They looked so bored. Before heading back downstairs, she gave each one a squid.
Kurz, of course, had the final contribution. He left a note on the kitchen floor:
HARKEN!
Alert the politician
The plunder of our Great Mother the sea must cease
Further trespassing and violation will lead to tragedy
Fish-eaters repent!
THE TIME IS AT HAND!!!
The letterhead on the note read 'New Squid Militia.'The name signed was 'Nick Pollotta.'
That latter came from Sousuke. He had read a fiction book titled 'That Darn Squid God.' The story, depicting the Duterian Empire's attempt to usher in the return of that malevolent entity, was an entertaining read in the vein of Sherlock Holmes adventures and other Victorian tales.
It was penned by Nick Pollotta.
Of course, Mizuki would eventually realize the truth---especially since Kaname left an open phone book on her bed, the number of the Meat Shop circled with lipstick. She wondered if the irksome girl would ever admit her role in things to her distraught parents.
As the van pulled away, Kaname noted that the neighborhood cats would have a very pleasant evening.
Every feline within ten city blocks was on a bee-line for Mizuke's house.
x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x
"SOUSUKE!!!"
Kaname waved while yelling across the quad.
"SOUSUKE….. OVER HERE…."
Hearing his name, Sousuke walked over, keeping a sharp eye on everyone walking near Kaname.
"I've been looking for you, Sousuke!!!" The look on her face was rather intense.
Sousuke misinterpreted her piercing stare.
"Uh...."
"Sousuke?"
"I...."
"SOUSUKE???"
"Errr..."
"SOUSUKE!!!"
"I apologize, Kaname." Sousuke bowed. His gaze left her face, looking back to the school. A long plume of smoke snaked its way skyward.
"What happened?" Kaname didn't frown. She did not reach for her fan.
In fact, she hadn't even brought the halisen with her.
"A boy was acting rather strangely. I watched him from concealment. When he thought no one was looking, he placed something in your locker." Sousuke was sweating.
"So you blew it up?" Kaname's face was still angelic.
"Yes."
"Oh, that's OK." She smiled.
"Uh... OK? You didn't know about that? Then it must have been the other thing..."
"Other thing, Sousuke?" Kaname kept seeing the look on Mizuki's face in her head. It was such a wonderful day.
"Yes. Again, I apologize."
"Why?"
"The ball field."
"What about the ball field, Sousuke?" Kaname looked in that direction. A huge cloud of dust dulled the look of the late afternoon sun.
"I do not believe you will have your softball match tomorrow." Sousuke kicked at the dirt with his shoe.
"Oh?" Kaname tossed her hair. She undid her bow and refashioned it.
"There was a man with a shovel and a bag of large objects. He was digging in the dirt, planting those items."
"Those were the bases, Sousuke. I told you that before." Kaname took out her mirror and checked her lipstick.
"Yes. But, this was a different man. I had not known he was the new grounds-keeper until after the grenade."
"I see." Kaname pulled one of her stockings up a bit.
"He should be out of the hospital in time for next week's game."
"It's not a problem, Sousuke." Kaname chuckled, thinking about a house full of squid. She wished she could have been a fly on the wall.
"You did not know that either?" Sousuke couldn't understand why Kaname wasn't acting in her usual fashion.
"What else did you do, Sousuke?" Kaname wasn't angry. But, she did want him to finish getting things off of his chest.
Until he finished with his confession, they couldn't leave.
"Uh...."
"Sousuke?"
"Ummm...."
"It's OK, Sousuke."
"A large box arrived with your name on it. Nothing else. No explanatory paperwork. No manifesto declaring its authenticity. " Sousuke was twiddling his fingers. Kaname smiled.
She'd never seen that normal gesture done by him before.
"Yes, it was for the front of the school. Part of the beautification project paid by this year's fund raisers." She had spent a lot of time and energy organizing bake sales, magazine drives, sports pledges, and the likes.
"It was ticking, Kaname."
"Of course. It is a large clock." The fancy artifice would be erected at the groundbreaking ceremony next week. It should become one of the most talked about neighborhood attractions.
"Was a clock, Kaname." He looked over near the loading bay. A number of fire trucks were there. The arcing spray of water created a miniature rainbow.
"Exploded that too?" Kaname checked her nails.
Sousuke just nodded his head.
"OK, now that you got all that you're done reporting, its time for ice cream." She patted her purse with her hand.
"Ice cream, Kaname?"
"Yes. My treat." She smiled and started walking. She stopped when Sousuke remained standing.
"It is not too long before dinner time, Kaname. Why would you wish to go for ice cream? It is low in nutritive value." Sousuke looked puzzled.
"For fun, Sousuke!" There was a touch of steel in her voice.
"Fun, Kaname?" He still didn't move.
The blue-haired girl squared her shoulders. Did Sousuke mean 'What does the word 'fun' mean?' or 'Why would ice cream be fun?'
Neither one would create the perfect mood.
"You do know what fun is, don't you Sousuke?"
"Uh..."
"Everybody has something they think is fun!" Kaname shook her finger at him. "Even otakus."
"I..."
"Sousuke. Tell me something you think is fun. And don't mention books, movies, or anything to do with weapons or warfare." Kaname checked her watch.
They did have homework to do, after all.
"Ummm..."
"NOW, SOLDIER!" Kaname's hands went to her hips. Her face grew cloudy.
"Errr... I... uh... being around you is fun…… I think." Sousuke couldn't bring himself to make eye contact with Kaname."
Kaname was speechless. Her mouth fell open. Her chest rose and fell with deep fast respirations. Her heartbeat pounded in her ears. Warmth came to her cheeks, then spread everywhere else.
"Are you alright, Kaname?" Sousuke looked concerned.
"Uh..." Kaname felt as if she was floating, with no attachment to the ground.
"KANAME."
"Ummm..." The breeze had never felt so good.
"KANAME!!!" Sousuke's shout broke Kaname's reverie.
"Yes. Let's go get that ice cream, Sousuke. You have had ice cream before, haven't you?" Kaname began humming a happy little tune.
"I have tasted it before. On occasion, the commanders would buy some for the submarine crew. I did not understand the relevance of it. Sgt. Major Mao ordered me to try some."
Kaname stopped dead in her tracks.
"Kaname? Are you OK?" Sousuke thought about asking about her circulatory problem. He decided not to. Kaname seemed very self-conscious about it.
"You don't understand the 'relevance?'" Kaname's voice carried an accent of total disbelief.
"No."
"Dessert doesn't need to have any special meaning, Sousuke. It is not supposed to have great nutritional value. It's all about the taste, silly!" Kaname felt as if she were lecturing the first alien to land on earth.
"I have not placed much importance on taste, Kaname. Food serves a purpose. It fuels the body. It keeps one alive. The flavor of protein bars is not to my disliking."
"That's terrible, Sousuke!" Kaname was shocked. She realized that Sousuke was different. She kept finding out just how different each and every day.
"It is not a problem. When I was very young……and on my own…… I had to eat what I could find. After meals of raw rat, dog, rotten fruit, and moldy refuse, I learned not to pay attention to taste. It is a useful skill to have in the military."
Kaname put her hand over her mouth. "Garbage?"
Sousuke nodded.
She started swaying on her feet. "DOG??"
Sousuke nodded again.
She put her hand to her forehead. "RAT???"
"Yes. Most often they were dead."
Kaname tripped and fell to the ground.
"I had no idea. I'm s-s-sorry, Sousuke." She fondly remembered her childhood. She had seen a rat once, on a family trip to the city. It had glared at her from a pile of garbage. At the time, it was the most horrible thing she had ever seen. She cringed thinking about the words 'most often.'
This was not a conversation she wanted to have on the way to ice cream.
Sousuke gave Kaname a hand up. He promised himself to take Kaname to a doctor after ice cream. A medical professional might have something to correct Kaname's obvious anemia.
"Well, enough about the past. You're with Kaname Chidori now. Who better to teach you about good taste?" She smiled.
Sousuke didn't answer.
"First, I will explain ice cream to you, since you don't seem to know anything about it!" Kaname sat Sousuke down on a bench and assumed an authoritative pose.
"That is incorrect, Kaname."
"What?" Kaname was caught off guard. Sousuke had said he had never really eaten ice cream.
"I have come across reference to ice cream in the past. A flavored ice concoction was popular in China, thousands of years ago. "
"Uh..." Kaname was stunned. Sousuke couldn't possibly do it! He couldn't turn ice cream into something otaku, right?
"In 500 B.C., the ancient Greeks refreshed themselves with a mixture of snow from Mount Olympus, mixed with fruit juices."
"I..." Kaname felt her face redden again, for a different reason.
"Alexander the Great would motivate his soldiers with a similar treat one hundred and fifty years later. He had large trenches dug and filled with ice. The ice was flavored with honey and nectar."
"Errr..." The vessels at Kaname's temples were throbbing. Her vision blurred slightly.
"Nero sent runners to the mountains of the Alpennines for snow in the first century B.C. That was before Rome burned, of course."
He skipped ahead a number of centuries.
"King Charles I of England paid the man who brought the recipe for ice cream to his nation a large stipend to keep it a royal prerogative. He was beheaded soon after that. I do not know if there was a connection." Sousuke rubbed his chin.
"I..." Kaname clenched her teeth.
"In World War II, the American armed forces competed furiously with each other, to see who could outdo the other by serving ice cream to the troops." Sousuke paused to cough. "Of course, soldiers are never happy. The Americans had more ice cream than they knew what to do with. The British gave their troops beer rations. Each group of men was envious of the other."
"Sous---" Kaname was shaking.
"In addition, I once read a book called 'The Ice Cream War.'"
Kaname's eyes narrowed at that last word.
"It was about a little know conflict during the first World war. A small German expeditionary force in Tanzania, led by Colonel von Lettow-Vorbeck, defeated a vastly larger joint British and Indian landing force. The Germans were aided by millions of angry bees whose hives had been destroyed by gunfire."
"SOUSUKE!!!" Kaname kicked Sousuke in the shins. "This is about having fun today, not stupid stuff that happened before we were even born!" She kicked him again. "Fun, Sousuke." Another kick, harder than the last. "Do you understand? Fun!" One more kick. "My treat."
Sousuke didn't know what to say. By reflex he simply said "Thank you, Kaname."
It was the correct answer.
Kaname's smile returned, then blossomed. "You know, you can really be sweet when you put your mind to it." She patted him on the cheek.
"Thank you Kaname." If it worked once, why not use it again?
Kaname blushed.
"OK, where was I? Forgetting any possible military references...." Kaname's look suggested grievous harm if Sousuke did otherwise. "Let me tell you about ice cream. It is simply one of the most wonderful creations known to man. It is so-o-o-o-o creamy...." Kaname closed her eyes, looking ready to swoon.
"I must apologize, Kaname. I do not wish you to go misinformed. Current ice cream is not made with actual cream. It consists of 10-16 milk fat; 9-12 milk solids other than fat; 12-16 sweeteners, usually a combination of sucrose or glucose-based corn syrup; 0.2-0.5 stabilizers and emulsifiers, such as agar ; and 55-64 water, which comes from milk and other ingredients. About 50 of the actual volume of the food stuff is air incorporated during the whipping process. Frozen custard contains egg yolk as well. Ice milk has less than 10 milk fat. Sherbert has only 1-2 milk fat and a greater amount of sweetener. Sorbet contains fruit puree and no milk products."
Sousuke managed to get that all out with a single breath.
Kaname wasn't angry.
She was too stunned to be angry.
Sousuke did not eat ice cream, but sounded as if he had a PhD in icecreamology.
"How?"
"After Sgt. Major Mao ordered me to consume the ice cream, I did extensive research. I trust her judgment implicitly. I wished to find out what ingredients made ice cream a valuable resource for the warrior. Sadly, I found none. It is the only faulty command I can attribute to her."
Sousuke?" Kaname spoke little above a whisper.
"Yes?"
"Do me a favor..." Her voice grew a little louder.
"Kaname?"
"DON'T SAY ANOTHER WORD UNTIL I ASK YOU TO!" She was only a decibel or two shy of shouting.
"Yes, Kaname!" Sousuke stiffened and snapped off a salute.
"Sousuke...." Kaname spoke quietly again, moving her finger, beckoning Sousuke to come closer.
"Kaname?"
"NO SALUTING!!!" Kaname looked ready to bite.
"By your command."
"Oooooooooh!" Kaname grabbed Sousuke by the collar. "Didn't I tell you 'DON'T SAY ANOTHER WORD'?"
"Y---" Sousuke wisely stayed quiet.
After that, Kaname settled down and began to describe the wonders of ice cream. The coolness. The creaminess. The many amazing flavors. She told him about the place that ice cream had in her heart. I represented everything that was good and right and pure.
"No doubt it was ice cream that is responsible for me being as sweet as I am today." She looked at Sousuke expectantly. When he didn't say anything she stomped her foot and said "Hmmmpppfff! Some gentleman you are."
Sousuke shook his head, opened his mouth, and pointed with his finger.
"Oh, that's right. You have my permission to speak, Sousuke." Kaname swept her hand out, a truly generous gesture.
Sousuke remained silent.
"Sousuke?" The generosity evaporated.
The young soldier said nothing.
"SOUSUKE!" Kaname clenched her hands into fists.
"Thank you, Kaname."
That had worked before. He couldn't think of anything else at that moment.
"For what ?" Kaname looked very cross.
Sousuke's battlefield experience came to his rescue then. The 'Fog of Dealing With a Teenage Girl' was not that different than the 'Fog of war.' If one tactical approach failed, one must try another.
"Yes, Kaname. Sweet." It worked. Bullseye. Kaname smiled.
While they walked to the JR line, Kaname still had a smile on her face. On the ride to Ikebukuro Station, that smile never left her face for an instant. Strolling to Ice Cream City, the smile remained.
That was Kaname's record for smile endurance around Sousuke.
For a while, Kaname even took hold of Sousuke's arm.
Sousuke looked somewhat confused, but he kept quiet. He let Kaname do as she pleased. That alone made it was a miraculous day.
He
was learning.