A/N: For those of you who hadn't notived yet: this is somewhat a sequel to
'Small Snippets From Lupin's Daily Life'. If you find any of the situations
here confusing, you could read the other Snippets first. They might clear
things up, they might confuse you even further. But that's the risk you'll
be taking.
The Day Everyone Kept Bumping Into Lupin On Purpose
It was a busy day for the occupants of 12, Grimmauld Place. Harry Potter had just arrived the night before and everyone had a busy time settling him in and making him at ease.
It happened, therefore, a lot more often than was usual, that people kept bumping into Lupin.
The first time it happened that day it was completely excusable, since Lupin had been going down the stairs and Fred and George up. They grinned at him like mad and made their apologies over and over, all the while bumping into him some more. Slightly distracted, Lupin finally reached the bottom of the stairs, only to bump into Snape.
"Watch it, would you," Snape spat at Lupin, who recoiled and stepped backwards - just enough to bump into Mrs Weasley, who was carrying a large tray of china. The tray and the china fell to the floor, causing loud crashing noises, which, in turn, woke Mrs Black's portrait.
"Scum! Filth! Abominations! Half-breeds! Werewolves!" she howled. "How dare you! Break into my house and smash my china!"
"Oh, really sorry, I'm so sorry," said Lupin, slightly in shock.
"Oh, shut up," growled Sirius, pulling Mrs Black's curtain back over the portrait. "Snape was only just leaving, don't worry." Snape shot him a nasty look, but refrained from making a comment and plainly left.
"Hey Remus," Sirius said, grinning about as madly as the twins. Then, for absolutely no ostensible reason, he bumped into Lupin.
"What was that for?" Lupin asked Sirius, rubbing his left arm where Sirius had painfully bumped into him.
"Ah, yes, I just wanted to 'bump' into you," said Sirius, grinning and winking.
"Right," said Lupin, deciding it would be better to get to the kitchen.
Just as he entered the kitchen, Tonks wanted to leave. He stepped aside for her to pass, but instead she made directly towards him and softly bumped into Lupin.
"But, I made room!" spluttered Lupin, at a loss. "Why did you bump into me?"
"You know, I'm so clumsy," said Tonks, also winking. "Wotcher, Remus," she added, brushing her hand lightly over his cheek as she left. Lupin just gaped at her.
"Right," he repeated.
He had some time on his own in the kitchen, thinking the other's actions over. How could they believe he was so naïve as to not see they were constantly bumping into him on purpose? As he stroked his chin thoughtfully, he prepared to teach them a lesson.
"OooooOooh, Fred, I'm soooo sorry," Lupin said, slapping his face in mock disbelieve. "I can't believe I just bumped into you!"
Fred and George goggled at him. Fred was covered in the Hippogriff droppings Lupin had been carrying around on a plate. Stupid as that may have seemed in the first place, the droppings DID serve their purpose. Lupin excused himself and stole off to the kitchen.
On his way there, though, he encountered Sirius, who flashed a smile at him, just before he realised Lupin was driving him up against the wall.
"Gods, Remus, what are you doing?" said Sirius, apparently really taken aback.
"Dear me, Sirius," said Lupin, softly touching Sirius's hips with his hands. "I guess I bumped into you there, didn't I?" Although he was slightly less tall than Sirius, he had completely overpowered him. Sirius had gone pale and was trembling all over before Lupin finally released him.
"Got to dash," Lupin managed to say in the most faggy way he could come up with, and left Sirius to blink at his back.
In the kitchen, Lupin had his second encounter with Tonks.
"Hi," he said, walking straight into her. She looked up at him, puzzled, and tried to get past him, but failed, as he kept blocking her way so she kept bumping into him.
"Would you please stop that," she said after some five bumps and increase of irritation. "I'd like to pass."
"Oh, I actually thought you'd like to come close to a male body," Lupin said off-handed.
Tonks blinked at him in fear, flushing scarlet. Her colour clashed violently with her hair. He softly stroked her hair, actually feeling a small tinge of remorse for putting her through this. He leaned forward just a bit more, and kissed her cheek.
"I'm sorry if I hurt you," he whispered in her ear, meaning it.
"That's okay," Tonks said, not daring to meet his eye and colouring more deeply all the while. Lupin smiled at her, and she smiled back, though still weakly. He smiled somewhat broader, and she smiled broader, too. His grin acquired Cheshire-cat proportions and so did hers.
"That's better," said Lupin appreciative. "I've got to go do something."
"Okay," Tonks said, and he left, feeling relieved she didn't actually hate him now.
He had timed perfectly; just as he closed the kitchen door behind him, Snape entered through the front door. Lupin took some decisive steps towards him, slowed down, and lifted his arms like a zombie, just before he reached Snape.
Snape merely raised an eyebrow, and asked, "What on earth are you planning, Lupin?"
"Bother bother bother bother bother bother," Lupin said, pinching Snape softly wherever he could reach him.
"AAAAAGH!" shrieked Snape, and ran for it.
Lupin was thoroughly satisfied.
The Day Everyone Kept Bumping Into Lupin On Purpose
It was a busy day for the occupants of 12, Grimmauld Place. Harry Potter had just arrived the night before and everyone had a busy time settling him in and making him at ease.
It happened, therefore, a lot more often than was usual, that people kept bumping into Lupin.
The first time it happened that day it was completely excusable, since Lupin had been going down the stairs and Fred and George up. They grinned at him like mad and made their apologies over and over, all the while bumping into him some more. Slightly distracted, Lupin finally reached the bottom of the stairs, only to bump into Snape.
"Watch it, would you," Snape spat at Lupin, who recoiled and stepped backwards - just enough to bump into Mrs Weasley, who was carrying a large tray of china. The tray and the china fell to the floor, causing loud crashing noises, which, in turn, woke Mrs Black's portrait.
"Scum! Filth! Abominations! Half-breeds! Werewolves!" she howled. "How dare you! Break into my house and smash my china!"
"Oh, really sorry, I'm so sorry," said Lupin, slightly in shock.
"Oh, shut up," growled Sirius, pulling Mrs Black's curtain back over the portrait. "Snape was only just leaving, don't worry." Snape shot him a nasty look, but refrained from making a comment and plainly left.
"Hey Remus," Sirius said, grinning about as madly as the twins. Then, for absolutely no ostensible reason, he bumped into Lupin.
"What was that for?" Lupin asked Sirius, rubbing his left arm where Sirius had painfully bumped into him.
"Ah, yes, I just wanted to 'bump' into you," said Sirius, grinning and winking.
"Right," said Lupin, deciding it would be better to get to the kitchen.
Just as he entered the kitchen, Tonks wanted to leave. He stepped aside for her to pass, but instead she made directly towards him and softly bumped into Lupin.
"But, I made room!" spluttered Lupin, at a loss. "Why did you bump into me?"
"You know, I'm so clumsy," said Tonks, also winking. "Wotcher, Remus," she added, brushing her hand lightly over his cheek as she left. Lupin just gaped at her.
"Right," he repeated.
He had some time on his own in the kitchen, thinking the other's actions over. How could they believe he was so naïve as to not see they were constantly bumping into him on purpose? As he stroked his chin thoughtfully, he prepared to teach them a lesson.
"OooooOooh, Fred, I'm soooo sorry," Lupin said, slapping his face in mock disbelieve. "I can't believe I just bumped into you!"
Fred and George goggled at him. Fred was covered in the Hippogriff droppings Lupin had been carrying around on a plate. Stupid as that may have seemed in the first place, the droppings DID serve their purpose. Lupin excused himself and stole off to the kitchen.
On his way there, though, he encountered Sirius, who flashed a smile at him, just before he realised Lupin was driving him up against the wall.
"Gods, Remus, what are you doing?" said Sirius, apparently really taken aback.
"Dear me, Sirius," said Lupin, softly touching Sirius's hips with his hands. "I guess I bumped into you there, didn't I?" Although he was slightly less tall than Sirius, he had completely overpowered him. Sirius had gone pale and was trembling all over before Lupin finally released him.
"Got to dash," Lupin managed to say in the most faggy way he could come up with, and left Sirius to blink at his back.
In the kitchen, Lupin had his second encounter with Tonks.
"Hi," he said, walking straight into her. She looked up at him, puzzled, and tried to get past him, but failed, as he kept blocking her way so she kept bumping into him.
"Would you please stop that," she said after some five bumps and increase of irritation. "I'd like to pass."
"Oh, I actually thought you'd like to come close to a male body," Lupin said off-handed.
Tonks blinked at him in fear, flushing scarlet. Her colour clashed violently with her hair. He softly stroked her hair, actually feeling a small tinge of remorse for putting her through this. He leaned forward just a bit more, and kissed her cheek.
"I'm sorry if I hurt you," he whispered in her ear, meaning it.
"That's okay," Tonks said, not daring to meet his eye and colouring more deeply all the while. Lupin smiled at her, and she smiled back, though still weakly. He smiled somewhat broader, and she smiled broader, too. His grin acquired Cheshire-cat proportions and so did hers.
"That's better," said Lupin appreciative. "I've got to go do something."
"Okay," Tonks said, and he left, feeling relieved she didn't actually hate him now.
He had timed perfectly; just as he closed the kitchen door behind him, Snape entered through the front door. Lupin took some decisive steps towards him, slowed down, and lifted his arms like a zombie, just before he reached Snape.
Snape merely raised an eyebrow, and asked, "What on earth are you planning, Lupin?"
"Bother bother bother bother bother bother," Lupin said, pinching Snape softly wherever he could reach him.
"AAAAAGH!" shrieked Snape, and ran for it.
Lupin was thoroughly satisfied.