"I Used to Love Him"
******
Author's Note:
Hi, there. Sorry this took so long. This chapter got deleted from my disk when I was almost finished with it. GAH! So, I had to start over. Well here it is, in all its late as hell glory.
******
"Isaac."
The weather witch raised an elegant white brow in the direction of her son. She was sitting Indian style in front of the boy and he in the same position.
"You are supposed to be meditating, young man." She continued, never opening her eyes.
The black haired boy sighed heavily before giving up completely. Storm opened her eyes to start into an identical pair.
"Sorry, mom." Static said with a frown. "It just seems so stupid. I mean- I can't clear my head. I can't just stop thinking. I'm always thinking."
Ororo Munroe let out a husky chuckle.
"Isaac."
"Mom." The blue eyed teen pleaded.
"Static." She said, forcing her self to call her son by his nickname.
She sighed lightly. "I named you Isaac for a reason. I must have liked the name. Though, the goddess only knows why."
Static unleashed a chuckle of his own. "Dad named me. You named Vash."
"Hmm." She said smiling. "Of course."
She turned attention back to her non-meditating son and sighed.
"Static, we came out here for a purpose. So, close your eyes and at least try to clear you mind. Now."
"Mama." The lanky teen whined. "I can't. How 'bout we just go inside and have lunch like normal mutants?"
"Because we are not normal mutants, son." She began.
And Static prepared for 'Mistress Storm's Patented Control Speech'.
"Your powers have been fluctuating as of late, am I correct?" the ashen haired woman asked.
"Yes."
"Your mutant abilities are key to your physiology and tied to your emotions. Something you inherited from me, no doubt." She said with a small smile. "And they are growing along with your body. You are slowly losing control. And that is dangerous, son. Not to mention, costly. Do you have any idea how much is spent keeping you with your 'power surges'?"
The electrokinetic cringed.
"I know how hyperactive you are but you mustn't let your gift get the better of you," She continued. "Hence meditation."
"In know." The dark haired boy admitted.
"Now close your eyes."
"Fine." He said with a huge grin. "But afterward, can we have lunch?"
Storm only smiled in answer.
******
Marie D'Ancanto gave a loud huff and pushed her book away. She had finally given up on reading Hamlet. Besides her book report wasn't due for another two weeks. She had previously attempted to take a nap before next period but her nauseating headache had made that impossible. She reached in her bag and retrieved a bottle of aspirin. She was taking them three at a time now, without even a drop of water. She was sure that she would be forced to visit Doctor McCoy soon. The strange migraines had surfaced about a month ago, around the same time that she had begun to control her powers. About the same time that she and Bobby had started humping like wild bunnies. She smiled at the thought, before wincing in pain. A ragged sigh escaped her lips.
The infamous John incident had only happened that one time, but it had tainted further encounters every since. Bobby still had no idea. She tried to ignore it but the idea of her Bobby and St. John Allerdyce having had a sexual relationship had been quite intriguing. Things had just seemed to fall into place afterwards.
She remembered times when the two had been together. Things that had been done or said that had appeared to be so innocent at the time. The way that she'd notice John staring at Bobby from across the room. She had once thought it to be simple rivalry or jealousy but now she saw it as something more. There had also been times that she had barged into the boys' room and found them jumping up suddenly, Bobby's face full of guilt. She had brushed aside the uncomfortable feelings that surfaced when ever she was with them both. But things were starting to add up now.
She found herself wondering what had caused the end of the extremely odd relationship. Odd? Maybe that wasn't the correct word for it. It wasn't that she was not familiar with same sex relationships. Even in her home state of Mississippi, they were seen quite frequently. They were apart of everyday life. She didn't have a problem with that. And even though Bobby definitely didn't seem like the type, it made since. Fire and Ice.
They must have been an exciting couple. But had they really loved each other?
If so, what had been the reason for the dissolution of the relationship? Wait a minute. Maybe she was the reason. John had always seemed jealous of her and Bobby's relationship. Had Bobby broken up with the pyrokinetic so he could be with her?
Now everything was making sense; John's attitude problem, the smart comments, the longing staring in the couple's direction. John hadn't wanted her- it had been Bobby all along.
She finally let herself absorb it all. And it only made her head hurt. A whole month and now she finally got. Damn, she was slower than she thought.
The southern teen pushed from the table abruptly, knocking her books to the floor.
"Sorry." She squeaked out in the direction of an annoyed looking Wanda Maximoff.
She was going to see Bobby now and tell him everything. And then he was going to tell her everything.
******
Jonothon Starsmore looked on at the scene in front of him in morbid awe. He was in the mist of one of Professor Logan infamous Self Defense classes. At the moment the man of the hour was locked in an epic struggle with Jono's best friend and cuddle buddy Vashoba Wagner. And to everyone's never-ending surprise, she was winning.
The grumpy Canadian wasn't using his claws, thankfully. Probably for the benefit of the younger kids. However the London Goth remembered tales from Vash of times in the Danger Room when she had narrowly missed being torn a new windpipe.
Jono cringed as a particularly nasty backhand caught the raven haired teleporter by surprise.
Most of the students at the school didn't participate in this class for obvious reasons. For some, it was because their parents didn't approve. The one's whose parents gave a damn about them that is. And others, just couldn't stomach the shear violence involved. Jono didn't really have a problem in either department for two reasons. One being that his father had disowned him long ago. The other reason being that his stomach was among the organs that he lost when his mutation emerged. So he didn't have problem stomaching much of anything anymore. His sole purpose for signing up for the brutal course was to appease his constant companion, Vash. She had insisted that he needed to brush up on his fighting skill. London street-brawling excluded, the little that he had done, especially since he had long ago decided that he would be joining her in the ranks of the X-Men on day. Strangely enough, neither of them had brought up the idea much anymore.
The chestnut haired mutant was brought out of his reverie by the extremely loud sound of flesh smacking across flesh and a surprised Professor Logan streaking across the gym floor. His eyes widened in shock right along with everyone else in the room.
"Mr. Logan!" Kitty Pryde shrieked as she sprung from her seat next to Jono and bound down the bleachers.
The petite brunette knelt beside the grounded man.
"Are you alright?"
The angry Wolverine sat up with a shocked expression painted on his features.
"I- I'm sorry." Vash stuttered, before realizing that saying this was probably a mistake.
The self defense coach, part time art teacher, gave a small growl.
"Mr. Logan, are you sure you're aright?" Kitty asked; helping the huge but oddly short man up.
"I'm fine Half-pint." Logan said standing up. "Either I'm getting old or yer gettin' stronger, Zip."
"Uh, I don't know." Vash said sheepishly.
"Maybe we should call it a day." Logan said. "I need a beer." He grumbled under his breath.
Kitty watched the older male shrink in the distance.
*Wow, ducks.* Jono erupted. *That was amazin'*
Vash didn't reply. She just slunk to the bleachers and sat down.
"Yeah." She said numbly.
"Whoa, like Vash, you've really gotten stronger." Kitty added.
The amber eyed teen stared at her hands.
"I- I had no idea I was that strong." She muttered. "I mean I kicked him clear across the room."
*Yeah, love, we saw.* Jono said with a crinkle.
"I mean with the adamantium skeleton and all," Vash began. "Logan has got to be at least 300 pounds."
Realization hit Vash's two friends.
"Wow." Kitty said breathlessly. "I didn't even think about that."
"Oui."
The three teens turned around to stare in to scarlet and black eyes.
*Hi, Rem.* Jono finally spoke up. *What do yer think about this latest development.*
"Well, Jono," The Cajun said, giving it ample thought. "I tink it a bit odd." He added with his trademark grin. " Y'been feeling different lately, chere?"
"No more than usual." The teleporter replied. "Maybe I should tell the Professor."
"If you don't, I'm sure Mr. Logan will." Kitty sighed. "Don't worry Vash. I'm sure it's nothing big. I mean like, maybe you've like developed super strength or something."
Vash raise and eyebrow at that.
"Not another one." She groaned. "I'm weird enough as it is."
"Aww, chere." Remy said with a smile. "Y'not weird, juss insanely blessed."
******
Bobby Drake stared worriedly into a pair of greenish-gray eyes. Marie was tapping her foot impatiently waiting for his reply. To his absolute terror, he had no idea what to say.
"How long had she known about him and St. John and why did she have to choose now to say something about it?"
"Well?" The southern teen asked.
"Marie-" Bobby attempted. "I- I really don't know what to say."
"It's a simple question, Bobby." Marie said with a serious expression. "Did you and St. John have something going on before Ah got here?"
The blue eyed boy just stared at her panic stricken.
"Robert Drake!" The mutant named Rogue erupted. "Do you think that Ah'm some close minded bigot that would not accept ya if she knew that ya had been in an intimate relationship with someone of the same sex!"
The Iceman's face frozen immediately. He began to stutter and stumble over his words in response, trying desperately to appease his girlfriend.
"No!" He croaked. "Absolutely not! Of course I don't think you're a bigot, Marie. I just-"
"Well?" Marie asked after regaining her composure. "What's the deal with these memories Ah got, Bobby? Ah touched you and Johnny remember? Ah mean, all of a sudden, things are starting to make a lot of sense."
Bobby sighed heavily.
"Why didn't you say something about this when it first happened?" He asked.
"Ah don't know." Rogue said. "At first Ah wasn't even sure what Ah was seeing. And it didn't actually happen at an opportune time." She added with a weak smile.
The blond boy remained silent as he listened to his girlfriend.
"Did it really happened?" She asked quietly. "If it did Bobby, ya know Ah don't care. Ah just want to know the truth."
Bobby ran a hand through his short spiky hair. Then he began-
"Yes. It happened."
He looked to Marie to gage her reaction. He saw nothing but a warm smile.
"When John first got here we became the best of friends and being roommates and all we ended up spending a lot of time together. It's not something that we intended to happen, it just did." Bobby said, his voice straining in exasperation. "It wasn't that I was ashamed of our relationship, it was just that. I didn't really know what to do. If my parents had found out- it was bad enough to be a mutant but then-."
Bobby gave up. He didn't know what else to say. He hadn't even let himself think those negative thoughts since he had ended things with St. John. Bobby was in fact, finding it harder to breathe though. He hadn't thought it would be so hard talking about it, especially with Marie. He had known this day was coming for sometime. If only he had practiced what to say when the time came.
"I didn't break up with him because I was ashamed of him." The cyrokinetic said quickly. "Because I wasn't. Things were good between us while they lasted."
"Did ya love him?"
The question caught Bobby off guard. He should have been expecting it; of course she would want to know that. Didn't all girls? He looked up into her eyes and released a breath he hadn't known he'd been holding.
"Yeah. I guess I did."
Marie looked away; staring at the floor thoughtfully.
"Of course ya did." She looked up at him with a small smile. "Well, what happened then?"
Bobby looked puzzled.
"Why did ya guys break up?"
Though, she knew the answer deep down, she just had to hear the words out of her boyfriend's mouth.
"You."
The brown haired girl slumped down in the bed.
"Wonderful." She sighed. "That explains a lot."
Bobby smiled ruefully.
"And ta think Ah thought that John was being such an ass because he wanted me." She mumbled.
The two of them sat in silence for a bit.
"He did like you." Bobby finally said. "Just not that way. He knew it wasn't your fault."
"He left because of me." Bobby said out of the blue.
Marie sat up in shock.
"Bobby, ya don't really believe that do you?" She said softly.
"Why else would he up and leave with Magneto?"
"He said it him self, Bobby. He just didn't fit in here." She responded.
Bobby knew that Marie was basing this statement on limited knowledge, but he couldn't tell her the truth. That he had continued sleeping with John even after the two of them had gotten together. And about how much of an ass he'd been. He only hoped that with the memories that she possessed from the two of them, that she wouldn't be able to put it together.
The two lovers continued to sit in silence for a little longer.
"Well, Ah really should get ta class." Marie finally said.
She walked over to the door and turned to the emotionally exhausted boy.
"Ah'll see ya later, okay. We can talk some more."
"Okay." He said quietly.
And then she was gone.
Maybe he could at least keep one more secret. Perhaps, one day he would tell her and maybe she would even forgive him, even if he couldn't forgive himself. Hell, St. John might even find it in his heart to forgive him too. After all, he used to love him, right?
******
Author's Note:
Hi, there. Sorry this took so long. This chapter got deleted from my disk when I was almost finished with it. GAH! So, I had to start over. Well here it is, in all its late as hell glory.
******
"Isaac."
The weather witch raised an elegant white brow in the direction of her son. She was sitting Indian style in front of the boy and he in the same position.
"You are supposed to be meditating, young man." She continued, never opening her eyes.
The black haired boy sighed heavily before giving up completely. Storm opened her eyes to start into an identical pair.
"Sorry, mom." Static said with a frown. "It just seems so stupid. I mean- I can't clear my head. I can't just stop thinking. I'm always thinking."
Ororo Munroe let out a husky chuckle.
"Isaac."
"Mom." The blue eyed teen pleaded.
"Static." She said, forcing her self to call her son by his nickname.
She sighed lightly. "I named you Isaac for a reason. I must have liked the name. Though, the goddess only knows why."
Static unleashed a chuckle of his own. "Dad named me. You named Vash."
"Hmm." She said smiling. "Of course."
She turned attention back to her non-meditating son and sighed.
"Static, we came out here for a purpose. So, close your eyes and at least try to clear you mind. Now."
"Mama." The lanky teen whined. "I can't. How 'bout we just go inside and have lunch like normal mutants?"
"Because we are not normal mutants, son." She began.
And Static prepared for 'Mistress Storm's Patented Control Speech'.
"Your powers have been fluctuating as of late, am I correct?" the ashen haired woman asked.
"Yes."
"Your mutant abilities are key to your physiology and tied to your emotions. Something you inherited from me, no doubt." She said with a small smile. "And they are growing along with your body. You are slowly losing control. And that is dangerous, son. Not to mention, costly. Do you have any idea how much is spent keeping you with your 'power surges'?"
The electrokinetic cringed.
"I know how hyperactive you are but you mustn't let your gift get the better of you," She continued. "Hence meditation."
"In know." The dark haired boy admitted.
"Now close your eyes."
"Fine." He said with a huge grin. "But afterward, can we have lunch?"
Storm only smiled in answer.
******
Marie D'Ancanto gave a loud huff and pushed her book away. She had finally given up on reading Hamlet. Besides her book report wasn't due for another two weeks. She had previously attempted to take a nap before next period but her nauseating headache had made that impossible. She reached in her bag and retrieved a bottle of aspirin. She was taking them three at a time now, without even a drop of water. She was sure that she would be forced to visit Doctor McCoy soon. The strange migraines had surfaced about a month ago, around the same time that she had begun to control her powers. About the same time that she and Bobby had started humping like wild bunnies. She smiled at the thought, before wincing in pain. A ragged sigh escaped her lips.
The infamous John incident had only happened that one time, but it had tainted further encounters every since. Bobby still had no idea. She tried to ignore it but the idea of her Bobby and St. John Allerdyce having had a sexual relationship had been quite intriguing. Things had just seemed to fall into place afterwards.
She remembered times when the two had been together. Things that had been done or said that had appeared to be so innocent at the time. The way that she'd notice John staring at Bobby from across the room. She had once thought it to be simple rivalry or jealousy but now she saw it as something more. There had also been times that she had barged into the boys' room and found them jumping up suddenly, Bobby's face full of guilt. She had brushed aside the uncomfortable feelings that surfaced when ever she was with them both. But things were starting to add up now.
She found herself wondering what had caused the end of the extremely odd relationship. Odd? Maybe that wasn't the correct word for it. It wasn't that she was not familiar with same sex relationships. Even in her home state of Mississippi, they were seen quite frequently. They were apart of everyday life. She didn't have a problem with that. And even though Bobby definitely didn't seem like the type, it made since. Fire and Ice.
They must have been an exciting couple. But had they really loved each other?
If so, what had been the reason for the dissolution of the relationship? Wait a minute. Maybe she was the reason. John had always seemed jealous of her and Bobby's relationship. Had Bobby broken up with the pyrokinetic so he could be with her?
Now everything was making sense; John's attitude problem, the smart comments, the longing staring in the couple's direction. John hadn't wanted her- it had been Bobby all along.
She finally let herself absorb it all. And it only made her head hurt. A whole month and now she finally got. Damn, she was slower than she thought.
The southern teen pushed from the table abruptly, knocking her books to the floor.
"Sorry." She squeaked out in the direction of an annoyed looking Wanda Maximoff.
She was going to see Bobby now and tell him everything. And then he was going to tell her everything.
******
Jonothon Starsmore looked on at the scene in front of him in morbid awe. He was in the mist of one of Professor Logan infamous Self Defense classes. At the moment the man of the hour was locked in an epic struggle with Jono's best friend and cuddle buddy Vashoba Wagner. And to everyone's never-ending surprise, she was winning.
The grumpy Canadian wasn't using his claws, thankfully. Probably for the benefit of the younger kids. However the London Goth remembered tales from Vash of times in the Danger Room when she had narrowly missed being torn a new windpipe.
Jono cringed as a particularly nasty backhand caught the raven haired teleporter by surprise.
Most of the students at the school didn't participate in this class for obvious reasons. For some, it was because their parents didn't approve. The one's whose parents gave a damn about them that is. And others, just couldn't stomach the shear violence involved. Jono didn't really have a problem in either department for two reasons. One being that his father had disowned him long ago. The other reason being that his stomach was among the organs that he lost when his mutation emerged. So he didn't have problem stomaching much of anything anymore. His sole purpose for signing up for the brutal course was to appease his constant companion, Vash. She had insisted that he needed to brush up on his fighting skill. London street-brawling excluded, the little that he had done, especially since he had long ago decided that he would be joining her in the ranks of the X-Men on day. Strangely enough, neither of them had brought up the idea much anymore.
The chestnut haired mutant was brought out of his reverie by the extremely loud sound of flesh smacking across flesh and a surprised Professor Logan streaking across the gym floor. His eyes widened in shock right along with everyone else in the room.
"Mr. Logan!" Kitty Pryde shrieked as she sprung from her seat next to Jono and bound down the bleachers.
The petite brunette knelt beside the grounded man.
"Are you alright?"
The angry Wolverine sat up with a shocked expression painted on his features.
"I- I'm sorry." Vash stuttered, before realizing that saying this was probably a mistake.
The self defense coach, part time art teacher, gave a small growl.
"Mr. Logan, are you sure you're aright?" Kitty asked; helping the huge but oddly short man up.
"I'm fine Half-pint." Logan said standing up. "Either I'm getting old or yer gettin' stronger, Zip."
"Uh, I don't know." Vash said sheepishly.
"Maybe we should call it a day." Logan said. "I need a beer." He grumbled under his breath.
Kitty watched the older male shrink in the distance.
*Wow, ducks.* Jono erupted. *That was amazin'*
Vash didn't reply. She just slunk to the bleachers and sat down.
"Yeah." She said numbly.
"Whoa, like Vash, you've really gotten stronger." Kitty added.
The amber eyed teen stared at her hands.
"I- I had no idea I was that strong." She muttered. "I mean I kicked him clear across the room."
*Yeah, love, we saw.* Jono said with a crinkle.
"I mean with the adamantium skeleton and all," Vash began. "Logan has got to be at least 300 pounds."
Realization hit Vash's two friends.
"Wow." Kitty said breathlessly. "I didn't even think about that."
"Oui."
The three teens turned around to stare in to scarlet and black eyes.
*Hi, Rem.* Jono finally spoke up. *What do yer think about this latest development.*
"Well, Jono," The Cajun said, giving it ample thought. "I tink it a bit odd." He added with his trademark grin. " Y'been feeling different lately, chere?"
"No more than usual." The teleporter replied. "Maybe I should tell the Professor."
"If you don't, I'm sure Mr. Logan will." Kitty sighed. "Don't worry Vash. I'm sure it's nothing big. I mean like, maybe you've like developed super strength or something."
Vash raise and eyebrow at that.
"Not another one." She groaned. "I'm weird enough as it is."
"Aww, chere." Remy said with a smile. "Y'not weird, juss insanely blessed."
******
Bobby Drake stared worriedly into a pair of greenish-gray eyes. Marie was tapping her foot impatiently waiting for his reply. To his absolute terror, he had no idea what to say.
"How long had she known about him and St. John and why did she have to choose now to say something about it?"
"Well?" The southern teen asked.
"Marie-" Bobby attempted. "I- I really don't know what to say."
"It's a simple question, Bobby." Marie said with a serious expression. "Did you and St. John have something going on before Ah got here?"
The blue eyed boy just stared at her panic stricken.
"Robert Drake!" The mutant named Rogue erupted. "Do you think that Ah'm some close minded bigot that would not accept ya if she knew that ya had been in an intimate relationship with someone of the same sex!"
The Iceman's face frozen immediately. He began to stutter and stumble over his words in response, trying desperately to appease his girlfriend.
"No!" He croaked. "Absolutely not! Of course I don't think you're a bigot, Marie. I just-"
"Well?" Marie asked after regaining her composure. "What's the deal with these memories Ah got, Bobby? Ah touched you and Johnny remember? Ah mean, all of a sudden, things are starting to make a lot of sense."
Bobby sighed heavily.
"Why didn't you say something about this when it first happened?" He asked.
"Ah don't know." Rogue said. "At first Ah wasn't even sure what Ah was seeing. And it didn't actually happen at an opportune time." She added with a weak smile.
The blond boy remained silent as he listened to his girlfriend.
"Did it really happened?" She asked quietly. "If it did Bobby, ya know Ah don't care. Ah just want to know the truth."
Bobby ran a hand through his short spiky hair. Then he began-
"Yes. It happened."
He looked to Marie to gage her reaction. He saw nothing but a warm smile.
"When John first got here we became the best of friends and being roommates and all we ended up spending a lot of time together. It's not something that we intended to happen, it just did." Bobby said, his voice straining in exasperation. "It wasn't that I was ashamed of our relationship, it was just that. I didn't really know what to do. If my parents had found out- it was bad enough to be a mutant but then-."
Bobby gave up. He didn't know what else to say. He hadn't even let himself think those negative thoughts since he had ended things with St. John. Bobby was in fact, finding it harder to breathe though. He hadn't thought it would be so hard talking about it, especially with Marie. He had known this day was coming for sometime. If only he had practiced what to say when the time came.
"I didn't break up with him because I was ashamed of him." The cyrokinetic said quickly. "Because I wasn't. Things were good between us while they lasted."
"Did ya love him?"
The question caught Bobby off guard. He should have been expecting it; of course she would want to know that. Didn't all girls? He looked up into her eyes and released a breath he hadn't known he'd been holding.
"Yeah. I guess I did."
Marie looked away; staring at the floor thoughtfully.
"Of course ya did." She looked up at him with a small smile. "Well, what happened then?"
Bobby looked puzzled.
"Why did ya guys break up?"
Though, she knew the answer deep down, she just had to hear the words out of her boyfriend's mouth.
"You."
The brown haired girl slumped down in the bed.
"Wonderful." She sighed. "That explains a lot."
Bobby smiled ruefully.
"And ta think Ah thought that John was being such an ass because he wanted me." She mumbled.
The two of them sat in silence for a bit.
"He did like you." Bobby finally said. "Just not that way. He knew it wasn't your fault."
"He left because of me." Bobby said out of the blue.
Marie sat up in shock.
"Bobby, ya don't really believe that do you?" She said softly.
"Why else would he up and leave with Magneto?"
"He said it him self, Bobby. He just didn't fit in here." She responded.
Bobby knew that Marie was basing this statement on limited knowledge, but he couldn't tell her the truth. That he had continued sleeping with John even after the two of them had gotten together. And about how much of an ass he'd been. He only hoped that with the memories that she possessed from the two of them, that she wouldn't be able to put it together.
The two lovers continued to sit in silence for a little longer.
"Well, Ah really should get ta class." Marie finally said.
She walked over to the door and turned to the emotionally exhausted boy.
"Ah'll see ya later, okay. We can talk some more."
"Okay." He said quietly.
And then she was gone.
Maybe he could at least keep one more secret. Perhaps, one day he would tell her and maybe she would even forgive him, even if he couldn't forgive himself. Hell, St. John might even find it in his heart to forgive him too. After all, he used to love him, right?