Usual disclaimers apply.  This will be my last post for a while.  I'm taking a vacation.  Unfortunately, it won't be to a warmer climate.  I hope you enjoy and think it's worth waiting for more…

            Little Ryan ran through the house flying his model airplane complete with sound effects.  Round and round he went, circling the wall that separated the kitchen and living room. 

"Knock it off," Dawn yelled, a cigarette dangling from her lips, while she stirred a large pot of tomato sauce with one hand and leafed through the Enquirer with the other.

Little Ryan didn't hear.  He jogged around humming, "Sszzzhhh," as he stretched his hand high in the air so that the plane reached higher.  "Ssszzzhhh."  On his third time around, Ryan bumped into a potted plant, turning it over on its side so that the soil spilled all over the floor.  He skidded to a halt and with wide-eyes stared at the mess he had created.

"Didn't I tell you to knock it off?" Shouted Dawn.  She rushed at Ryan with her hand raised and wham; Dawn smacked his ass so hard that she sent him flying a few inches.  She raised her hand again, but he knew what to do.  Ryan curled into a ball, letting the blows rain hard on his arms and legs, as he protected his face and the top of his head.  He didn't cry.  He had stopped crying long ago.  When the slapping and punching subsided, Ryan looked up and saw Sandy's face, with his busy eyebrows, looking at him with a raised fist over his head.

"No!" Screeched Ryan and he bolted up in bed.  He tried to steady his breathing, because he knew Sandy or Kirsten was bound to run in to see that he was okay.  He inhaled deeply until his chest was full and then he let it out slowly.  As he was exhaling, Sandy ran in, tying his robe around his waist. 

"Are you okay?"  Sandy sat at the edge of Ryan's bed, and reached over to place a reassuring hand on the teenager.

Ryan scrambled away from Sandy's touch.

"Ryan, it's me, Sandy."  He reached out again, but Ryan scurried to the other side of the bed, far from Sandy's grasp.

"It's okay." Sandy tried to soothe his foster son.  "I won't hurt you."  He tried not to sound wounded at Ryan's distrust.  He tried to remember that Ryan was still foggy from his dream.  He just wondered why in his dreams, Ryan mistrusted him.  "Do you want some cocoa or warm milk?  It will help you sleep."

Ryan shook his head.  "You're supposed to wake me up anyway."

"True," said Sandy.  "But I'm supposed to wake you up a few times.  Can't do that if you don't go back to sleep. You usually keep yourself awake after a nightmare."

"I'll try to go back to sleep," Ryan promised.

"Good.  Good."  Sandy slapped his knee and stood up, but wavered before leaving.  "Ryan, could you please share your dream?"

Ryan shook his head forcefully.  "No."  The fog had lifted and he knew he was in no danger from Sandy, but Ryan couldn't let Sandy know what he must fear deep down inside.  "I can't.  Please don't make me."

"I won't.  But Ryan, tomorrow you will have to start facing these dreams when you see the therapist."

"I don't want to think about it."

"Then think about the sleep you'll start getting if you just let yourself open up."

"A few solid hours during the night would be nice."

"Good.  Then let's get back to sleep."  Sandy noticed that Ryan was not heading back to bed, but seemed to be following him.  "Back to bed, Ryan.  You need some sleep."

"I was just –"

"No just.  Back to bed."  Sandy shook his finger at the bed.  "Come on."

Resigned, Ryan followed Sandy's instructions, knowing he couldn't win this argument.

            Ryan went to school even though the entire Cohen clan tried to talk him out of it.  He just couldn't miss any more classes and didn't want another absence to draw more attention to himself.  He had to do some fast-talking so that Kirsten would agree.  She was in her mother bear mode, fierce and protective.  She finally relented when he convinced Sandy and Seth and the three of them ganged up against her.

            "Okay," she said, throwing up her hands.  "You win.  Go to school.  But I'll be waiting for you at the front office at three o'clock sharp.  We have an appointment at three thirty."

            "I'll be there."

            "Hey there," Marissa said, coming in through the back door.  She glided over to Ryan and kissed him on the cheek.  "I tried you calling you last –" She stopped short when she saw the cuts and abrasions on Ryan's face.  "What happened to you?"

            "I'll tell you on the way to school.  Don't want to be late.  Mr. Epstein is supposed to be out today and I think Ms. Matthews is covering homeroom."

            "Dragon lady?  Oh we better get moving."  They waved good-bye and headed to the car.

            Ryan tried to explain the story to Marissa, with Seth filling in some the details, but he hadn't told her about the nightmares and the sleepless nights.  Whenever she was around, he tried to put on a brave front, not letting his fatigue show.

            "How did you lose control?" asked Marissa, averting her gaze from the road for a split second.

            Ryan stole a quick glance at Seth.  "I'm not sure," he lied.  He looked down at his fingernails, which were short and ragged, because lately he was in the habit of biting them.  "The airbags never even deployed.  They're looking into what went wrong."  He knew he was distorting the truth to let her believe a lie, but Ryan didn't want to worry Marissa.  He shot Seth a meaningful look. 

Seth threw up his hands and mouthed, "I'm not saying anything."

            Though Ryan wasn't very religious, he had been silently praying all day, in hope that Kirsten would forget about his appointment.  No such luck.  At three sharp, Kirsten, clad in a designer pantsuit and sleek three-inch heels, was waiting for him at the front gate.  She held her briefcase on her shoulder and pulled him in for a quick embrace when she saw him.

            "How was your day?" She asked.

            "Okay."

            "Good.  Seth didn't want to come and say hello?"

            Ryan shrugged.   "He was pretty wrapped up with Anna and Summer."

            Kirsten started walking towards the car.  "I'm still not used to Seth being this…"

            Ryan said, "chick magnet?" while Kirsten searched for the right words.

            "I wouldn't have put it in those terms," she said with a laugh, "but yes, a chic magnet."

            He gazed out the window while trying to hide his smile. 

            "I was here a bit early and had the chance to talk to some of your teachers.  Seth's too," she quickly added, so Ryan wouldn't think she was checking up on him.

            He turned to Kirsten.  He tried to remember when the last time Dawn had come to his school just to chat with his teachers.  She had only come when the school forced her, threatening expulsion or a call to child services if she didn't meet with his teachers or principal.

            "They had wonderful things to say about you.  Dr. Kim said you had exceeded all of her expectations.  Mr. Tolliver thought you needed a little more sleep –"

            Ryan laughed.

            "I told him we were working on the problem, but that we were aware of it."  Kirsten slowed the car down for the red light and glanced over at Ryan.  "I also saw your calculus teacher.  Mr., I forgot his name."

            "Mr. Fagan."

            "Yes that's it.  He said you were one of the best in the class."

            "You had time to talk to all of these teachers."

            "They were all in the office."  She reached over the gearshift to squeeze Ryan's knee.  "I'm proud.  I was proud to be there for both my boys." 

            Ryan didn't know how to respond.  It all made him so nervous.  He was used to brutish remarks, and a swift kick in his ass.  He wasn't used to kind words, reassuring pats on the knees, or adults who were genuinely concerned with his welfare.  Sometimes when he was around Kirsten and Sandy he felt like he was on sensory overload.

            The décor of the therapist's office was fitting for his stature.  It was simple in taste, with two chocolate leather sofas that faced each other and a small oval coffee table in between.  An antique roll top desk was in the corner of the room alongside a small desk adorned with state of the art computer equipment. 

            Ryan sat down on one of the sofas and hoped the doctor wouldn't ask him to lie down.  Though if he did lie down, he'd probably fall asleep and then he wouldn't have to talk.  The thought put a smile on his lips.

            "Care to share?" When Ryan didn't answer, the doctor stretched out his hand and said, "I'm Dr. Acobas.  You must be Ryan."

            Ryan nodded.

            "Your parents said you weren't one for many words."

            Ryan was about to blurt out, "They called themselves that?  They called themselves my parents?"  But he didn't because he didn't want to give the doctor an opening to delve into territories he wasn't ready to open.

            "How long have you been living with the Cohens?"

            "About six months."

            "Are you happy there?"

            Ryan nodded.

            "Have you made friends here?"

            He nodded again.

            "Tell me about them?"

            Ryan sighed.  Some much for the yes and no questions.  But these guys were trained and Ryan had promised Sandy and Kirsten he would try.

            "Seth, he's Sandy and Kirsten's son.  He's great.  Like a brother, but a good friend too."

            "Can you tell him anything?"

            Ryan shrugged.  "I guess."

            "Who else is there?"

            "Luke."

            "How did you meet?"

            So Ryan told the therapist how he and Luke practically killed each other over Marissa.  How Luke had stood up for him after the model home had burnt down. How Luke had betrayed Marissa.  How they had become friends after Mr. Tolliver had assigned them to be partners on a history project and they had witnessed Luke's father kissing another man.

            "He was seriously disturbed by that."

            "But you were there for him."

            "I didn't turn my back on him.  I kept his secret and when everyone else found out, I had his back.  So now we're friends."

            "Can you confide in Luke?"

            "We like to hang out more."

            "And do what?"

            The session continued like that for the remainder of the forty minutes.  Ryan was surprised when the therapist said his time was up and he hadn't even asked about his dreams.  He stood, shook the man's hand, and went to the waiting room, where he saw Sandy had joined Kirsten.

            "You look unscathed," Sandy said.

            "It wasn't too bad."

            "Good," Kirsten said.  "Do you mind waiting for us?" she asked.  "Sandy and I are going to talk to the doctor."

            "Sure.  I'll catch up on some work."  He sat down on the couch, opened up the novel they were reading for class and he promptly fell asleep.  He didn't even hear Sandy or Kirsten come out of the office until they were shaking him awake.  As Ryan groggily sat up, he noticed the doctor watching the whole scene from the doorway.