Disclaimer: … My you people are slow.

Chapter 18- Contemplations

November

Contemplative

What exactly is in a name?

There are so many questions, meaningless questions that float around, that nobody cares to excavate deeply.

Now a name is simply like a method of identification. Like one names a plant. That is a soandso. Oh this is a Severus, and here we have a Harland and a Zachary.

How would we be without a name? Do we take on the characteristics of our name? Or does our name take on the characteristics of us?

Just one thing I was thinking about.

One other thing had me thinking this morning, and this might be hard to place in words. Where we put our loyalties.

First we are within a family, then circle of friends, school, club, town, province, country, then divided into those with the privileges of the western world, then to wizarding blood. And in there somewhere come Politics, Sex and Religion. Only past all that are we loyal to a group we call the human race. The last group we think of ourselves belonging to and the first group we blame when something goes wrong.

Now everyone is up in arms about our Dark Lord. To get order and purity there is going to be bloodshed, true, it's inevitable. But it's only for the good of our race. Sooner or later if we continue to branch out wizarding blood with become so diluted, magical ability will decrease until it is out of existence. And thus bring about the end of the wizards.

With all the mud blood's ruling the population if there isn't some action soon we'll be gone sooner than we think, by 2000 perhaps. It's possible.

And I certainly don't want us remaining purebloods to have to resort to inbreeding and other vulgar methods of procreation within ones family. I'm sure Lucius won't have any problems with these ideals though.

So there has to be a brief reign of terror, we need to cull the mud bloods out before they become more than a majority. Our Dark Lord has the power and will to do it. And I will see it done. It's imperative that it's done.

I understand why now. I know.

We should all be passionate about making sure the Wizards survive the muggles, and not become them. Everyone, even the mud bloods should be ready to sacrifice themselves. For so long I haven't placed a value to life, anyone's, but now I have a purpose. I don't need anything now, but to do this.

And now the ministry is getting all prepped up to fight My Lord off.

There are two sides to the wizarding world now, the 'dark side'. I keep getting the feeling I've heard that before, And then of course their side, which is the 'good' side.

How can they be good when they are inadvertently letting us die out? They are not good they are foolish. Letting people like Potter and the Gryffindors lead us. Gryffindors are fools, the bunch of them, Muggle loving fools. So brave and courageous to fight for a cause they don't understand, a false cause. Like I said there will be bloodshed, but not in vain. Anyway, the Gryffindors throw themselves into the middle of things and make a chaos of it. Like the ministry is doing now, trying to stop the course of the design our Lord has for us. They have no idea. They get themselves killed unnecessarily, when if they only backed off and let the Lord's will be done, and those needed dead, killed, there wouldn't be so many deaths.

For example Dumbledore, the stupid fool. Admitting mud bloods to Hogwarts or admitting anyone really without checking their wizarding history.  If they've got a bit of blood in 'em and they are in. I'm sure there was probably a very good reason Salazar didn't want any other wizards but purebloods admitted to Hogwarts. But nobody bothers to listen to the Slytherins because we are just evil according to the stereotype, therefore have no ideas apart from those of death. Therefore we couldn't possibly have any constructive input.

So everybody looks to Godric Gryffindor and hails him for admitting vermin to the school.

So our loyalties no longer lie within our friends, or family, or school even. It's all divided into two groups only, those for the dark lord, and those opposed. And I'm for.

I know my fiancée's loyalties lie in the same place as mine, and I'll make sure it remains that way or our martial bed will become her death bed, not by me of course but there are those…. Lord Voldemort takes priority over family. And our children or child rather if our firstborn is a boy, will be loyal. I've decided throwing ones family into the chaos of this, will be worth it in the end, and we will be finely rewarded.

But see the division within families? If Akira had other ideas, then I would be, she would be, looking to which side of the war we were on before looking to the family we belonged to.

A measure of the strength of the Gryffindors: They have to call Voldemort 'You-know-who' because they piss themselves when it is said out loud. I bet Potter shits himself even thinking about it. Though I hear he is aspiring to become an auror, the moron. I suppose he thinks, he, the Great Potter, can take on Voldemort and all his death eaters single handily.  I could kill him in an instant, should there not be a law against it. I know he'll die, I almost pity him. Almost.

I have a lot of confidence about this conquest.

El Dumbledork might pose a threat, but he is old, in no time he will be in a wheelchair dribbling into his pumpkin juice. Or if the old twit hangs about someone could just go in and kill him while he is playing with his rubby duckies in the bath. Oh god, I really do give myself unwanted images.

Hopefully, with any luck, he'll trip over his beard on the way somewhere and have a heart attack, knowing him.

Maybe we could have him chucked in Azkaban on counts of paedophilia. I'm sure Lucius would be only happy to help us out here. Then again it could take the fun out of it for our master, if Dumbledore got overexcited and had a heart attack.

I just hope this 'revolution' as you might put it, is quick. It shouldn't have to take long. Hopefully the ministry will just give in. Well if they are smart they will, and we all know the ministry. Of course they won't. Somehow I get the feeling it will never be as straightforward as I'd like it to be. Politics.

Warfare.

Resistance.

Conflict.

Death.

Of course the reasons I've given for joining Voldemort aren't the only, there is peer pressure, and I'd like to be the pressure-er than under it thank you very much. Then there is survival. Better to be at the right hand of the Devil than in his path, as the old quote goes. I'm far too talented to end up some desk boy in the ministry. Because of the over populating of the earth, done by the muggles, its hard to hold a wizarding Profession in the world, because everyone fears the muggles. There is nothing to fear. What does everything they are going to do if they found out about us? I personally think the good for nothing commoners should made our slaves. But that is against animal rights I presume.

What is the point in learning duelling if you can't use it for any real situations, apart from the odd social duel. If I settled for anything ordinary, like working in something silly like an apothecary, I'd just have too much pent up energy. Then I'd probably slowly morph into a maniac then suddenly break loose. I actually like the sound of that rather.

Getting all emotional and sentimental over it is pointless, it won't change a thing. Not even the glistening tear of the face of a tortured child could change Voldemort's mind.

There is nothing the ministry change do.

I hope Potter goes first, but not quickly.. very slowly, so that it takes a very very long time.

S. Snape

Authors Note: Didn't I say I was dragging it out. Just giving reasons for Severus's choices. Putting his thoughts to his actions. And shifting the focus off his erratic love life.