----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Title: Into the Abyss
Summary: Hitomi comes back home to Earth a little too late. The present reality of her home shocks her and causes her to escape from reality, finding something not so good to preoccupy her. Will anyone be able to help her from her depression? Moreover, is the reality that she sees actually REAL?
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: I don't own Escaflowne. So no suing please! No infringement intended! Just borrowing the lovely characters of Escaflowne. This story, however, is mine. Oh and the short sayings. :) As for the songs, they are owned by their respective singers.
Etcetera: Sorry for the long wait. College is getting to me! oh and ^_^ THANK YOU so much for those who reviewed! The reviews inspired me greatly! please keep them coming.
Important Note: THINGS INSIDE [ ] are THOUGHTS.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
CHAPTER 2:
I keep telling you I'm here
But you're just not listening
You're living in your own world
Where truth ceases to exist
- by SabrinaYutsuki (the author of this fic)
Narrator's POV:
Darkness. There was nothing else her eyes saw.
Adjustng to lack of sight, Hitomi decided to rely on her other senses.
Her hands tried desperately to grasp onto something. Somehow, the dim room was causing her to feel dizzy, especially because of the defeaning sound that was penetrating her ears. It sounded much like the whistle of a boiling kettle, only it magnified tenfold, so that it surrounded the whole area.
Finding nothing to touch, she felt nervous. How could everything she hears be bounced back in such loud, resounding echoes if there were no walls confined to the place? She tried desperately to feel her way through, like a blind person relying on her walking stick.
Then, a sudden pang hit her. It felt like a malignant headache. The abruptness of the pain was too much for her legs to support her body. She fell. Expectedly, to the ground.
But there was no ground.
Her system was on a continuous freefall.
She tried to scream.
Nothing.
Her speech had been taken away from her, too.
Now what?
Then it hit her.
Why was she there anyway? Her mind ached from trying to recall but to no avail.
Hitomi looked at the brighter side of things. The deafening sound had at least dissipated. Now she could hear a soft sing-song voice that she didn't mind hearing at all.
Suddenly...
[Coward.]
It had popped out of nowhere.
Coward? It all felt so vaguely familiar.
Then, like the rush of the ocean waves to the shore, everything came back.
[I did a cowardly thing.]
A tear fell down from her eye.
Surprisingly, the sound of it dropping felt near. It meant only one thing: she was going to meet hard ground again. She made a magnanimous effort of standing up so she could land with less impact. Soon, comfort embraced her heart. It wasn't hard ground, but it was something to step on, none the less. That assured her enough. She walked around, every step of the way causing the ground to sink.
Was she in heaven, walking on clouds? Couldn't be. Suicide is considered a mortal sin, after all, as she recalled her religion teacher drone about it for one whole hour. Hell maybe? Impossible. It wasn't terrifying enough and there was no hot lava boiling just underneath her. Then she remembered. Purgatory. That's it. She recalled her professor saying that purgatory was in between heaven and hell. At the moment, that's how it felt like. She felt a certain sense of terror coupled with peacefulness. What a paradox...
The emerald-eyed girl could not think it all through as the sing-song voice progressed from a very soft lullaby to a theatrical performance. Nevertheless, it gave her a warm feeling. She paused to hear more clearly and realized that it, she, or he was saying something to the melody of the chant. It wasn't loud enough for the human ear to fathom but because her vision was impaired, her ears were more attuned to the environment, much like a blind bat's ability to know where it is going by simply listening.
"Hitomi... It wasn't like you to do such a thing..."
A woman's voice.
[I know...] Tears filled her green eyes again.
"Hitomi, sometimes what you see is just a tiny part of a reality that you constructed out of fear or anxiety."
[Even if it all seems so real?]
"Yes. Even so." It was odd. The two females were carrying a conversation in Hitomi's mind, almost as if her thoughts materialized into speech.
"And even if it be true, you still have some unfinished business, right?"
[...]
"Hitomi, there is _always_ something worth living for."
[...], Hitomi remained speechless, as if she was under a spell.
"Remember, Hitomi. The only thing reliable in this world for you is your heart... and your intuition."
"I must go now. My time's up... Hitomi, I..."
A loud swoosh, as in the case of a spirit hovering away, was heard and the warmth was gone.
[That voice.]
[Like an angel.]
[No. Even more beautiful.]
Hitomi cried some more. Tears of sadness, joy, anguish mixed ironically as it fell.
The gods were cruel. If Hitomi only had her vision, she would have seen a pair of emerald eyes so full of life... so full of love, gazing at her intently. And if they had granted the voice a few more moments to stay, Hitomi would have heard all that she will ever need to live through.
"Hitomi, I love you my little darling. Please be strong."
But such was life.
And the pain and confusion took over once more.
Hitomi's brows were furrowed in deep contemplation. She wanted to recall every word the angel had said, with its exact intonation.
[There is _always_ something worth living for."]
She kept all her memories hidden deep inside. She understood its full meaning but could not put it upon herself to believe in it. At the moment, the only suitable place for the words of wisdom to reside was somewhere that still had a small amount of warmth, despite the frigid cold surrounding it... her heart. She clenched her fists as she felt a wave of light pass strongly towards her skin.
********
"Doctor Yasutoko! Come quickly...!"
A tall, handsome man with black hair rushed towards the source of the voice.
"Doctor, her heart. It's beating again!"
The beep of the heart monitor filled the room with an ounce of relief. The tense atmosphere had been so thick that it could have suffocated their throats any minute. But the relief cut through this like a hot knife on butter. Doctor Eito Yasutoko breathed a little easier but realized, that through his four years of experiencing almost every known accident and situation in a medical institution, he knew fully well it wasn't time to celebrate and call it a good day's work.
However, this was, in fact, an extraordinary case. The sound of the flatline had dominated the room for ten whole minutes already. She was clinically dead, with the emphasis on _was_. It was something unexplainable, especially for a man who had only knowledge on science, and nothing of what truly governs life. Dr. Yasutoko knew fully well that science and medicine couldn't be given credit for this one. After examining the teenager in scrutiny, he muttered that "she was fine" and opted to leave the room.
A woman well around her forties sat beside Hitomi. Her face had been like a kaleidoscope of emotions, showing wrinkles that were sure sings of deep worry when Hitomi's heart had suddenly died, then displaying laugh lines of utter joy as her heart started to beat once more.
Now, the woman's visage had turned stoic as she looked at the patient as though she was silently praying for her complete recovery. Surely enough, her prayers were answered as the patient's eyes fluttered open, meeting the wide smile of the older female.
It was evident in Hitomi's face that she knew the person looking back at her.
"Mrs. Uchida, I..."
"Don't talk, dear, just rest. I'll go grab you a cup of coffee downstairs at the canteen, okay?", Yukari's mother had a sweet voice, almost like her mother's. Almost...
As soon as the door was closed again, Hitomi took a deep breath.
She was alive.
It was a dream.
The angel was but a figment of her imagination...
Should she be grateful for her life back? Somehow, she wasn't. She longed for the angel's lulling voice... for eternal sleep. But the gods never did do things for people. They did things for themselves. They weren't any different from the gods who watched the games in the Coliseum in Ancient Rome, laughing heartily while a lion launches an attack against its human opponent. They longed for entertainment.
Granting Hitomi her wish would be rather dull. So the gods wouldn't do so. Conflicts never arise when needs are met. And action doesn't happen without conflicts.
Hitomi cursed silently. She knew from her previous encounter in Gaea that everything happened for a reason. _Fate_. She hated that word especially since it did not favor her at the moment. Surviving her suicide meant that she had a reason to be in the world and she didn't want to know that.
"Screw this world."
After useless curses, she decided to get up. It was hard and demanded a lot of her energy. As she finally made a sitting position, she had already used up all the vigor she had grabbed from her sleep. Cold sweat matted her chestnut brown hair. With a sigh, Hitomi lay in her bed once more, making sure she made little or no movement.
[I wonder if she knows what I did...], she thought, her mind being the only thing moving at that time. To her, what she did that night was embarrassing and VERY pathetic. If Mrs. Uchida knew, Hitomi was sure she'd be pitied. And she didn't want or need that. It would make her feel weaker than ever and strength was the only thing accompanying Hitomi at the time. Then, she slightly laughed. [What strength? The strength that made me try to kill myself with a pathetic pocket knife?]
The girl with the boy-cut hair looked around her room, barely moving her neck. Her green irises met white as she saw the walls. [A typical hospital room], she thought. Aside from the dull white of the room that had occassional gray spots from dust and red brown bleeds from the rusty water of the air condition unit, the walls were pretty bare. Large windows on her right provided warm light to the room and shadows of different patterns were cast onto the carpeted floor due to the semi-translucent texture of the curtains that embraced some portions of the casement.
Tilting her head a little to the opposite direction, she saw a lime green end table with a vase of fresh peach roses. Just then, a soft creak was heard in the direction of the door. The woman from before had returned with a small steaming, styrofoam cup. "Here, Hitomi-chan." Hitomi took her gaze away from the flowers and grabbed the cup. She took a small sip and let the steam tickle her face. The hot liquid felt good as it travelled down her throat. She was in deep meditation, taking small sips at a fixed pace, thinking things through. Mrs. Uchida must have noticed that because she had taken a seat beside her bed and waited patiently without speaking.
[I should never do that again. Running away is just plain cowardice. I should always face my problems.] She remembered someone dear to her say that one day back in her younger years. Her mind strolled down to the past, where a younger Hitomi, with eyes wide as saucers and cheeks red as pomegranates, was crying on an adult's skirt. The adult's smile was glowing with love as she smoothed the child's hair and whispered words to her.
[Mother...]
Hitomi suddenly realized that she had survived for reconciliation. One way or another, she knew she would regret not settling things with her before she passed away. [Maybe the gods aren't that awful after all], Hitomi grinned, but only half-heartedly, for she had had many bouts with reality and if she had learned only one thing from it, it was that wishes could not all be granted, even with a tremendous amount of enthusiasm.
Her meditation ended at the same time the coffee cup was empty. At this time, Yukari's mother felt it was her cue to speak. She took the cup from Hitomi, threw it into the small trash bin and opened her mouth. "Hitomi, are you feeling better?" "Y..yes. I think so..."
"Good."
"Mrs. Uchida, thank you."
"There's no need to thank me. You are, after all, like a child to me."
Hitomi gave a brief smile. It bordered on the bitter side, as she remembered her mother once again.
The younger female rested on her bed again and resumed looking at the peach flowers. "Oh, you like those Hitomi? I bought them at the flower shop near here. Smell them, they're very fragrant." Hitomi reached for the flowers, stretching her arm. She looked at her pale skin and saw the gauze wrapping her recent wound.
It was an instant reaction.
Upon eye contact of the bandage, bits of memory flashed in front of her. The rain, the dull emerald eyes of her mother, the dying visage of her father, the knife, her wrist. The images appeared like an unending cycle, each scene followed by a blidning white light that resembled the flash of a camera. It started at a fairly moderate speed until it became extremely fast for Hitomi to handle. Pain shot up her head. Suddenly, all the images came crashing together and new scenes flashed before her.
There was blood. There was a scream of terror... and they all pointed to someone in particular.
Hysteria filled Hitomi.
Mrs. Uchida saw the glass eyes of Hitomi. She had been frozen in one position for some time now, her arm still extending to the roses. She shook Hitomi up, panic written clearly over her features.
"Hitomi! Hitomi! Oh God... Dr. Yasutoko!"
She shook her again, now more vigorously.
Like someone who woke up suddenly from a nightmare, Hitomi bolted upright.
"Mother! No!", the girl yelled with utmost concern.
She left the bed. Mrs. Uchida tried her best to restrain her telling her that she's too weak to walk, but the emerald-eyed girl shoved her aside. Despite the vertigo, Hitomi treaded on, one hand massaging her throbbing temples. The other tried to support her whole body, holding onto walls. She motivated herself to go on. [I must help mother... I must...]
But it was too much for her to handle.
"Mo..."
Everything spun out of control.
"ther..."
Till all she could see was darkness.
if shame had a face i think it would kind of look like mine
if it had a home would it be my eyes would you believe me
if i said i am tired of this now here we go one more time
i tried to climb your steps i tried to chase you down
i tried to see how low i could get down to the ground
i tried to earn my way i tried to change this mind
you better believe i tried to beat this
when will this end it goes on and on and over and over and over again
keep spinning around i know it won't stop till i step down from this for good
i never thought i'd end up here i never thought i'd be standing
where i am i guess i kind of thought it would be easier than this
i guess i was wrong now one more
time this is a sick cycle carousel this is a sick cycle,
~ "Sick Cycle Carousel" by Lifehouse
__________________________________________________________________________________________
a/n: hmmm... do you know who the voice was? For those who don't, you'll know in the later chapters when Hitomi, herself, deciphers the mystery. But I guess you probably guessed right? :) By the way, I finally realized who I'm going to pair her up with! But i'm not telling, hehe. '_' and Yukari's last name is Uchida, right? If it isn't, please do tell me her last name through the reviews. And for all you fellow Xtreme Games fans, I guess you know who Eito Yasutoko is. He's so cool! (and his little brother is, too!) anywayz, keep the reviews coming. c ya next chapter.
visit Silverchair's site: www.chairpage.com (forgot to put this in the previous chapter ^^)
visit Lifehouse's site: www.lifehousemusic.com
visit Extreme Games site: www.expn.com
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Title: Into the Abyss
Summary: Hitomi comes back home to Earth a little too late. The present reality of her home shocks her and causes her to escape from reality, finding something not so good to preoccupy her. Will anyone be able to help her from her depression? Moreover, is the reality that she sees actually REAL?
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: I don't own Escaflowne. So no suing please! No infringement intended! Just borrowing the lovely characters of Escaflowne. This story, however, is mine. Oh and the short sayings. :) As for the songs, they are owned by their respective singers.
Etcetera: Sorry for the long wait. College is getting to me! oh and ^_^ THANK YOU so much for those who reviewed! The reviews inspired me greatly! please keep them coming.
Important Note: THINGS INSIDE [ ] are THOUGHTS.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
CHAPTER 2:
I keep telling you I'm here
But you're just not listening
You're living in your own world
Where truth ceases to exist
- by SabrinaYutsuki (the author of this fic)
Narrator's POV:
Darkness. There was nothing else her eyes saw.
Adjustng to lack of sight, Hitomi decided to rely on her other senses.
Her hands tried desperately to grasp onto something. Somehow, the dim room was causing her to feel dizzy, especially because of the defeaning sound that was penetrating her ears. It sounded much like the whistle of a boiling kettle, only it magnified tenfold, so that it surrounded the whole area.
Finding nothing to touch, she felt nervous. How could everything she hears be bounced back in such loud, resounding echoes if there were no walls confined to the place? She tried desperately to feel her way through, like a blind person relying on her walking stick.
Then, a sudden pang hit her. It felt like a malignant headache. The abruptness of the pain was too much for her legs to support her body. She fell. Expectedly, to the ground.
But there was no ground.
Her system was on a continuous freefall.
She tried to scream.
Nothing.
Her speech had been taken away from her, too.
Now what?
Then it hit her.
Why was she there anyway? Her mind ached from trying to recall but to no avail.
Hitomi looked at the brighter side of things. The deafening sound had at least dissipated. Now she could hear a soft sing-song voice that she didn't mind hearing at all.
Suddenly...
[Coward.]
It had popped out of nowhere.
Coward? It all felt so vaguely familiar.
Then, like the rush of the ocean waves to the shore, everything came back.
[I did a cowardly thing.]
A tear fell down from her eye.
Surprisingly, the sound of it dropping felt near. It meant only one thing: she was going to meet hard ground again. She made a magnanimous effort of standing up so she could land with less impact. Soon, comfort embraced her heart. It wasn't hard ground, but it was something to step on, none the less. That assured her enough. She walked around, every step of the way causing the ground to sink.
Was she in heaven, walking on clouds? Couldn't be. Suicide is considered a mortal sin, after all, as she recalled her religion teacher drone about it for one whole hour. Hell maybe? Impossible. It wasn't terrifying enough and there was no hot lava boiling just underneath her. Then she remembered. Purgatory. That's it. She recalled her professor saying that purgatory was in between heaven and hell. At the moment, that's how it felt like. She felt a certain sense of terror coupled with peacefulness. What a paradox...
The emerald-eyed girl could not think it all through as the sing-song voice progressed from a very soft lullaby to a theatrical performance. Nevertheless, it gave her a warm feeling. She paused to hear more clearly and realized that it, she, or he was saying something to the melody of the chant. It wasn't loud enough for the human ear to fathom but because her vision was impaired, her ears were more attuned to the environment, much like a blind bat's ability to know where it is going by simply listening.
"Hitomi... It wasn't like you to do such a thing..."
A woman's voice.
[I know...] Tears filled her green eyes again.
"Hitomi, sometimes what you see is just a tiny part of a reality that you constructed out of fear or anxiety."
[Even if it all seems so real?]
"Yes. Even so." It was odd. The two females were carrying a conversation in Hitomi's mind, almost as if her thoughts materialized into speech.
"And even if it be true, you still have some unfinished business, right?"
[...]
"Hitomi, there is _always_ something worth living for."
[...], Hitomi remained speechless, as if she was under a spell.
"Remember, Hitomi. The only thing reliable in this world for you is your heart... and your intuition."
"I must go now. My time's up... Hitomi, I..."
A loud swoosh, as in the case of a spirit hovering away, was heard and the warmth was gone.
[That voice.]
[Like an angel.]
[No. Even more beautiful.]
Hitomi cried some more. Tears of sadness, joy, anguish mixed ironically as it fell.
The gods were cruel. If Hitomi only had her vision, she would have seen a pair of emerald eyes so full of life... so full of love, gazing at her intently. And if they had granted the voice a few more moments to stay, Hitomi would have heard all that she will ever need to live through.
"Hitomi, I love you my little darling. Please be strong."
But such was life.
And the pain and confusion took over once more.
Hitomi's brows were furrowed in deep contemplation. She wanted to recall every word the angel had said, with its exact intonation.
[There is _always_ something worth living for."]
She kept all her memories hidden deep inside. She understood its full meaning but could not put it upon herself to believe in it. At the moment, the only suitable place for the words of wisdom to reside was somewhere that still had a small amount of warmth, despite the frigid cold surrounding it... her heart. She clenched her fists as she felt a wave of light pass strongly towards her skin.
********
"Doctor Yasutoko! Come quickly...!"
A tall, handsome man with black hair rushed towards the source of the voice.
"Doctor, her heart. It's beating again!"
The beep of the heart monitor filled the room with an ounce of relief. The tense atmosphere had been so thick that it could have suffocated their throats any minute. But the relief cut through this like a hot knife on butter. Doctor Eito Yasutoko breathed a little easier but realized, that through his four years of experiencing almost every known accident and situation in a medical institution, he knew fully well it wasn't time to celebrate and call it a good day's work.
However, this was, in fact, an extraordinary case. The sound of the flatline had dominated the room for ten whole minutes already. She was clinically dead, with the emphasis on _was_. It was something unexplainable, especially for a man who had only knowledge on science, and nothing of what truly governs life. Dr. Yasutoko knew fully well that science and medicine couldn't be given credit for this one. After examining the teenager in scrutiny, he muttered that "she was fine" and opted to leave the room.
A woman well around her forties sat beside Hitomi. Her face had been like a kaleidoscope of emotions, showing wrinkles that were sure sings of deep worry when Hitomi's heart had suddenly died, then displaying laugh lines of utter joy as her heart started to beat once more.
Now, the woman's visage had turned stoic as she looked at the patient as though she was silently praying for her complete recovery. Surely enough, her prayers were answered as the patient's eyes fluttered open, meeting the wide smile of the older female.
It was evident in Hitomi's face that she knew the person looking back at her.
"Mrs. Uchida, I..."
"Don't talk, dear, just rest. I'll go grab you a cup of coffee downstairs at the canteen, okay?", Yukari's mother had a sweet voice, almost like her mother's. Almost...
As soon as the door was closed again, Hitomi took a deep breath.
She was alive.
It was a dream.
The angel was but a figment of her imagination...
Should she be grateful for her life back? Somehow, she wasn't. She longed for the angel's lulling voice... for eternal sleep. But the gods never did do things for people. They did things for themselves. They weren't any different from the gods who watched the games in the Coliseum in Ancient Rome, laughing heartily while a lion launches an attack against its human opponent. They longed for entertainment.
Granting Hitomi her wish would be rather dull. So the gods wouldn't do so. Conflicts never arise when needs are met. And action doesn't happen without conflicts.
Hitomi cursed silently. She knew from her previous encounter in Gaea that everything happened for a reason. _Fate_. She hated that word especially since it did not favor her at the moment. Surviving her suicide meant that she had a reason to be in the world and she didn't want to know that.
"Screw this world."
After useless curses, she decided to get up. It was hard and demanded a lot of her energy. As she finally made a sitting position, she had already used up all the vigor she had grabbed from her sleep. Cold sweat matted her chestnut brown hair. With a sigh, Hitomi lay in her bed once more, making sure she made little or no movement.
[I wonder if she knows what I did...], she thought, her mind being the only thing moving at that time. To her, what she did that night was embarrassing and VERY pathetic. If Mrs. Uchida knew, Hitomi was sure she'd be pitied. And she didn't want or need that. It would make her feel weaker than ever and strength was the only thing accompanying Hitomi at the time. Then, she slightly laughed. [What strength? The strength that made me try to kill myself with a pathetic pocket knife?]
The girl with the boy-cut hair looked around her room, barely moving her neck. Her green irises met white as she saw the walls. [A typical hospital room], she thought. Aside from the dull white of the room that had occassional gray spots from dust and red brown bleeds from the rusty water of the air condition unit, the walls were pretty bare. Large windows on her right provided warm light to the room and shadows of different patterns were cast onto the carpeted floor due to the semi-translucent texture of the curtains that embraced some portions of the casement.
Tilting her head a little to the opposite direction, she saw a lime green end table with a vase of fresh peach roses. Just then, a soft creak was heard in the direction of the door. The woman from before had returned with a small steaming, styrofoam cup. "Here, Hitomi-chan." Hitomi took her gaze away from the flowers and grabbed the cup. She took a small sip and let the steam tickle her face. The hot liquid felt good as it travelled down her throat. She was in deep meditation, taking small sips at a fixed pace, thinking things through. Mrs. Uchida must have noticed that because she had taken a seat beside her bed and waited patiently without speaking.
[I should never do that again. Running away is just plain cowardice. I should always face my problems.] She remembered someone dear to her say that one day back in her younger years. Her mind strolled down to the past, where a younger Hitomi, with eyes wide as saucers and cheeks red as pomegranates, was crying on an adult's skirt. The adult's smile was glowing with love as she smoothed the child's hair and whispered words to her.
[Mother...]
Hitomi suddenly realized that she had survived for reconciliation. One way or another, she knew she would regret not settling things with her before she passed away. [Maybe the gods aren't that awful after all], Hitomi grinned, but only half-heartedly, for she had had many bouts with reality and if she had learned only one thing from it, it was that wishes could not all be granted, even with a tremendous amount of enthusiasm.
Her meditation ended at the same time the coffee cup was empty. At this time, Yukari's mother felt it was her cue to speak. She took the cup from Hitomi, threw it into the small trash bin and opened her mouth. "Hitomi, are you feeling better?" "Y..yes. I think so..."
"Good."
"Mrs. Uchida, thank you."
"There's no need to thank me. You are, after all, like a child to me."
Hitomi gave a brief smile. It bordered on the bitter side, as she remembered her mother once again.
The younger female rested on her bed again and resumed looking at the peach flowers. "Oh, you like those Hitomi? I bought them at the flower shop near here. Smell them, they're very fragrant." Hitomi reached for the flowers, stretching her arm. She looked at her pale skin and saw the gauze wrapping her recent wound.
It was an instant reaction.
Upon eye contact of the bandage, bits of memory flashed in front of her. The rain, the dull emerald eyes of her mother, the dying visage of her father, the knife, her wrist. The images appeared like an unending cycle, each scene followed by a blidning white light that resembled the flash of a camera. It started at a fairly moderate speed until it became extremely fast for Hitomi to handle. Pain shot up her head. Suddenly, all the images came crashing together and new scenes flashed before her.
There was blood. There was a scream of terror... and they all pointed to someone in particular.
Hysteria filled Hitomi.
Mrs. Uchida saw the glass eyes of Hitomi. She had been frozen in one position for some time now, her arm still extending to the roses. She shook Hitomi up, panic written clearly over her features.
"Hitomi! Hitomi! Oh God... Dr. Yasutoko!"
She shook her again, now more vigorously.
Like someone who woke up suddenly from a nightmare, Hitomi bolted upright.
"Mother! No!", the girl yelled with utmost concern.
She left the bed. Mrs. Uchida tried her best to restrain her telling her that she's too weak to walk, but the emerald-eyed girl shoved her aside. Despite the vertigo, Hitomi treaded on, one hand massaging her throbbing temples. The other tried to support her whole body, holding onto walls. She motivated herself to go on. [I must help mother... I must...]
But it was too much for her to handle.
"Mo..."
Everything spun out of control.
"ther..."
Till all she could see was darkness.
if shame had a face i think it would kind of look like mine
if it had a home would it be my eyes would you believe me
if i said i am tired of this now here we go one more time
i tried to climb your steps i tried to chase you down
i tried to see how low i could get down to the ground
i tried to earn my way i tried to change this mind
you better believe i tried to beat this
when will this end it goes on and on and over and over and over again
keep spinning around i know it won't stop till i step down from this for good
i never thought i'd end up here i never thought i'd be standing
where i am i guess i kind of thought it would be easier than this
i guess i was wrong now one more
time this is a sick cycle carousel this is a sick cycle,
~ "Sick Cycle Carousel" by Lifehouse
__________________________________________________________________________________________
a/n: hmmm... do you know who the voice was? For those who don't, you'll know in the later chapters when Hitomi, herself, deciphers the mystery. But I guess you probably guessed right? :) By the way, I finally realized who I'm going to pair her up with! But i'm not telling, hehe. '_' and Yukari's last name is Uchida, right? If it isn't, please do tell me her last name through the reviews. And for all you fellow Xtreme Games fans, I guess you know who Eito Yasutoko is. He's so cool! (and his little brother is, too!) anywayz, keep the reviews coming. c ya next chapter.
visit Silverchair's site: www.chairpage.com (forgot to put this in the previous chapter ^^)
visit Lifehouse's site: www.lifehousemusic.com
visit Extreme Games site: www.expn.com
__________________________________________________________________________________________