A Funny Frontier Tale
By Super Karoru
Chapter 13: Mayhem In Mario Land

Now onward to our tale!

I'll give you ten points if you can guess where we are. That's right, Mars! No, no, Isle Delfino, of course.

We see the Chosen Children standing around doing things.

"So what do we do now?" asked Kouji.

"Aha, I know!" exclaimed Takuya.

"What?" asked the others.

"This idea is so superb, great, wonderful, and magnificient!"

"Well?"

Close-up to Takuya.

"I just forgot," he said.

Everyone sighed.

Uh oh, I'm getting that bad interdemensional-feeling... oh, crap, I just ruined the suspense, didn't I?

Meanwhile in a dark canyon hideout, very similar to the Evil Hybrids'.

"Mama mia!" exclaimed an Italian voice. "It seems that some kiddies are on Isle Delfino-a! Yoshi!"

Yoshi was looking at an magazine, but quickly hid it behind his back.

"Yosh!" Yoshi asked. (subtitles: What?)

"There are tresspassers-a!"

"Yos yosh yo yoshi! Yoshhhhhhi!" (subtitles: Are you still going on about that? Who cares?)

"I don't-a know what you said-a, but I completely agree."

Yoshi sighed.

"Where's Peach-a?"

We see Peach on the other side of the room, talking on her cell phone.

"Oh, Bowser!" giggled Peach. "Of course I'm free tonight!"

"Peach-a! Who are ya talkin' to?"

"Oh, sorry, Bowser, hold on. It's the gnome-man again," Princess Toadstool whispered into her bright pink phone.

"I thought-a I told ya to call me Big Red!" said Mario, while striking a pose.

Yoshi slapped his forehead.

"Whatever," sighed Peach.

"We must attack the children-a! By the order De Great Mario-a!"

"Yo Yoshi Yosh oshi," Yoshi said while shaking his head. (subtitles: I think starring in all those games has finally gone to his head.)

"Okay! Get everyone together and order the attack on Isle Delfino-a!" the strange plumber said as he ran over to his Closet-o-Nintendo Stuff.

Yoshi and Peach just shook their heads.

"Hey! Who stole my FLUDD-A?"

Back on Isle Delfino.

Some odd and suspenful music started playing, echoing across the island.

"Where is that odd and suspenful music coming from?" Bokomon asked.

"I don't know, but I sure feel odd and suspenful!" replied Neemon.

"Uh oh, I just remembered something," said Kouji.

"What?" asked Takuya.

"Kouichi's still probably on the loose somewhere..."

In the town square, Kouichi was prancing about the shops, fretting over what present to get Kouji, despite the fact that he tied him upside-down from a tree, but Kouichi was never one for grudges.

"Oh, I wonder what his size is..." Kouichi said, holding up a blue tank-top. "Oh, wait, we're twins. Silly me!"

Meanwhile, where Takuya and Izumi are, wherever that is.

"Hey, Izumi, did I ever tell you about the time I found an entirely new species of mold under my bed? And just think, it used to be a perfectly good piece of pizza! Though it still tasted the same after I found it..."

Izumi shook her head, muttering something about having poor taste.

Much to Izumi's luck, a dark plothole opened up from the darknessabove and a dark-colored Toad dropped out with a very dark grin. It was just dark, okay?

"Are you two Takuya and Izumi?" asked the demented-looking Toad in a rather calm voice.

"No, I'm the Queen of France and this is my dog, Wilbur."

"That's a shame. It's not good to lie." He took out an electric cattle prod. "I have my orders to kill you two. No hard feelings, right?" Toad Vader pushed a button and the device began to charge.

"Izumi, this would be a good time to run..."

"Exactly what I was thinking..."

Cue the chase scene.

Meanwhile...

Then from the green evergreens of the tropical surroundings, a Bomb-Omb walked towards Junpei. The Bomb-Omb. Its tiny feet trudged across the hot sand, leaving little footprints. It was round and black, like a bowling ball. Actually, it looked quite similar to a bowling ball, except for its little tiny eyes popping out, which were used to stare at the target which it would soon blow up. The fuse, the little fuse, used to make this strange creature explode had been lit, and...

"Do we need a whole paragraph about a Bomb-Omb?" Junpei interrupted.

He never got an answer, because it blew up.

Commercial Time!

Commercial 1:
Narrator: After turning into a good kid after being possessed, this guy's had time to do things... Presenting the newest hit CD out there... Kouichi's Stylin' Rap Hits! Featuring... "The Real Slim Kouichi"!
(We go to a scene where we see Kouichi with a microphone wearing huge clothes that are at least five sizes too big, wearing tacky jewelry, and makingstrange hand signals.)
Kouichi: Yo! Yo! Just cus' I was all dark, don't mean I ain't the real thing! Yo! I'm the slim Kouichi and all you slim Kouichi's ain't the real Kouichi's, so will the real slim Kouichi, which is me, please stand up! Please stand up!
Narrator: And you can't forget... "Without Kouichi"!
Kouichi: I say this looks like a time for me, 'cause all the fangirls are begging for me, 'cause they want the real Kouichi! Frontier's empty without me! Ya know what I'm sayin'?
Narrator: And since he's gonna get sued by Toei for this anyway, just don't even bother. That's Kouichi's Stylin' Rap Hits! Only at this five-second price of 1.00... Oops, too late! Call: 13245-Kouichi's-feeble-attempt-at-rapping-665.
(Goes to a scene of Kouichi repeating "Yo! Yo! Yo!", but then he eventually trips on his over-sized pants.)

Commercial 2:
(Scene opens to a field of flowers where a light breeze is blowing. Izumi is standing in the middle of the field.)
Female Narrator: Ever feel... unclean?
(Izumi starts walking around.)
FN: Like you need... some protection?
(Izumi continues walking and some white birds start flying past the camera.)
FN: Where you can feel normal and... fresh...?
(Izumi faces the camera, sighing slowly.)
Izumi: Then buy some Dove Soap, you morons!
FN: Yes, Dove Soap. Leaves you feeling fresh, protection against dirt, so you can feel normal.
Dove Soap! Buy it!

Back to the show.

"Hey, hey, hey! How 'bout a race with Koopa the Quick?" he asked Tomoki

"Uh, no thanks."

"What? No one's ever said no to Koopa the Quick before! Must race, must race!"

Koopa blew up for some reason.

"I just know I'm gonna be emotionally scarred after this," groaned Tomoki.

Oh, Tomoki, I feel your pain! Well, not really.

Back to Takuya and Izumi.

"AHHHHH!"

"NYAHAHA!"

They eventually were chased into a dead end! Toad Vader was closing in, the cattle prod sparking withmany volts of electricity.

"I've got you now... It's a shame we couldn't settle this over a cup of tea, but business is business," said Toad Vader.

Takuya stood nobly in front of Izumi, as if to protect her.

"I don't think so, you little Toad-head!" he shouted.

Toad Vader looked at the cattle prod. "They always have to make this difficult," he stated as he threw the prod aside and pulled out a bazooka.

"On second thought," said Takuya as hestepped behind Izumi, pushing her foward. "Shoot her! Shoot her!"

"Well, thanks a lot!" she shouted at him.

Toad shot a missle from the bazooka at them. Oh noes! It seemed there was no way out, they were trapped! Well, they were, until Kouji saw... and did the only thing he could.

"Junpei was in a pink and purple leotard in a commercial once!" he shouted.

Takuya and Izumi fell over. And by falling over, the missle missed them and crashed into the wall behind them. Who knew?

"And once again, Super Kouji has saved the day!" Kouji shouted. This time, it caused Toad Vader to fall over forwards, but by falling fowards the bazooka pointed downward toward the ground. And conveniently, he pulled the trigger.

"Aw, shucks."

BOOOOOOOM!

"Maybe I need another joooooooooob..." Ping!

"Well, that's something you don't see everyday," said Izumi.

"Guys, we should get off Isle Delfino while we still have a chance,"Kouji suggested.

"You're stealing all my lines!" said Takuya.

"And you know, Junpeiwas actually wearing that leotard in that commercial," said Kouji, a bit too loudly.

Takuya and Izumi cringed.

End of chapter 13.