A Funny Frontier Tale
By Super Karoru
Chapter 14: Curse of the Crossovers
Now onward to our tale!
We open to Isle Delfino. What else is new?
We pan over to the beach were we see Takuya, Izumi, Kouji, Junpei, and Tomoki crowding around looking at something on the sand.
"Okay, here's the plan to try to get off the island," said Takuya. "First we Spirit Evolve..." He pointed to a spot on a map drawn in the sand. "Then two of us will distract the inhabitants, and then we get some explosives..."
"Explosives?"
"Well, we want to make quick work of the island, don't we?"
The others backed away a little bit.
"We'd better get off the island fast, before we all lose out minds," said Izumi, shaking her head.
Kouji, Junpei, and Tomoki just nodded their heads in agreement.
"Hey, what's that supposed to mean?" Takuya asked while getting up and facing Izumi.
"Oh, nothing," responded Izumi.
Kouji decided to ignore the two. Looking around, he realized something. "Wait a minute."
"What?" asked Junpei.
"Where are Bokomon and Neemon?"
In Isle Delfino Plaza.
"HEEEEELP!" shouted Bokomon and Neemon, who were running from something.
They soon ran into a dead end.
"Don't hurt us!" they both pleased, clinging to each other for dear life.
It was a small creature sparking with electricity. It closed in.
"Chuuu!"
An electrical storm shot through the air, attracting the Chosen Childrens' attention from the beach.
"What the...?" exclaimed Izumi.
"Come on!" shouted Takuya as they all ran towards the Plaza.
Bokomon and Neemon fell to the ground, charred.
"Now it's time to capture them!" said a raspy voice.
"Oh no, it's not!" shouted Takuya as our heroes ran towards Bokomon and Neemon.
"Hmm?"
They came face-to-face with none other than...
"... Ash Ketchem?"
"The one and only!" Ash grinned.
"Who are you?" asked Misty.
"Are you Pokémon trainers?" questioned Brock.
"Pikaaa?"
"What the hell are they doing here?" muttered Kouji.
"Looks like another bad crossover," responded Tomoki.
"Maybe," said the others.
"Oh, right! I still need to capture those strange-looking Pokémon!" Ash said as he reached for a Pokéball on his belt. "Pokébaaaallll..."
"Wait!"
"What?"
"They're not Pokémon!" shouted Junpei.
"They're Digimon!" shouted Takuya.
"Di...gi...mon?" asked Ash.
"I've never heard of a Digimon before," said Misty.
"Maybe you should check the Pokédex, Ash," said Brock.
"Good idea! Haha, just kidding, I don't want to waste the energy getting it out when I could have a Pokémon battle!"
"How about not?" Kouji grumbled.
"Go, Charizard!" he shouted as he threw a Pokéball, but nothing came out. "Oh, man! I forgot I gave Charizard away!"
Everyone else sighed.
"How about... Butterfree! Er, no, gave him away too. Primeape! Nope. Pigeot? Maybe not. Uh oh..."
"Ash! How many Pokemon did you give away?" shouted Misty. "I told you not to give them all away, but you said 'No, Misty! We've got to give the show some angst!' Angst my ass!"
"Sorry, Misty," he cowered.
"Now, now, let's not have another lovers' spat, you two," said Brock, acting as the peacekeeper.
"Pika! Chu. Pikaaa," responded... honestly, who do you think said that?
Izumi, Kouji, Junpei, and Tomoki's just kept watching the Poké-gang, but unbeknowst to them, Takuya had noticed something else moving that had went around the corner and he gone over to see what it was.
On the other side of the Plaza.
Takuya turned the corner, "I could've sworn I saw something come by here..."
He continued walking, while staring at the pavement. He finally found the creatures that just happened to be small, furry animals that looked quite familiar...
"It's the ham-hams!" Takuya squealed.
The ham-hams were suddenly aware of their stalkee and ran off.
"Wait, don't go! I love you!" he shouted as he ripped off his shirt, revealing a... tattoo of the entire cast. He continued chasing the ham-hams, laughing like a mindless schoolgirl.
The hamsters ran even faster.
"Hey, where'd Takuya go?" asked Tomoki, who noticed his disapearance.
The others shrugged... but then they suddenly heard giddy laughing.
"Never mind."
"Ham-hams, come baaaaack!"
The ham-hams were talking to each other in their hamster language.
"Zis human iz quite persizztant!"commented Bijou.
"Hamtaro!" shouted Boss. "This is your fault! It was your idea to come to Isle Delfino!"
"Well, Laura was coming here too..." Hamtaro responded. "Or was it Hawaii? I always get those two places mixed up..."
"Dude, this is totally uncool," said Stan.
"Like, yeah," responded Sandy.
"Ah, but a journey somewhere is better than a journey to nowhere / May that be to an island in Nintendo land / Or to an endless void / Literature knows no bounds," said Jingle, still staying calm during the chase.
"Shut up, Jingle," said the others.
"I love you, ham-hams! "said Takuya, still continuing the chase.
Back with the others.
Izumi had just gone off to look for Takuya, leaving Kouji, Junpei, and Tomoki to deal with the Pokémon cast.
"Now we battle!" Ash said as he pulled his hat backwards.
"Let's not and say we did," said Kouji.
"But I wanna battle!" cried Ash.
"You'll have to excuse Ash," said Brock. "It's just that it's been four years and six seasons - and growing - and he's still ten years old."
"Ouch, stuck in the beginning of puberty!" Junpei commented.
"I fear for my sanity," Izumi said to herself as she was looking for Takuya. "Where could he be?"
"Hi, Izumi!"
Izumi then quickly turned around to find that Takuya was right behind her.
"Takuya, what do you think you're doing?"
"I was hunting for ham-hams!"
"You were what now?"
"Never mind. Wanna get ice cream?"
"Yeah, sure, whatever."
Somewhere else, outside a TV store, Kouichi was engrossed in the latest program.
"Looks like one of those award ceremonies," he said to himself.
"Welcomeback to the Insanity Awards!" exclaimed the host. "The next category is for Scariest Entrance. And the winner is... ...is... ...issssss... ...iiiisssssssssssss..."
"Just tell us already!" the crowd shouted.
"Ranamon Moon!"
"Oh noes!"
Ranamon and her fellow scouts walked out, quite honored at the opportunity to be on national television.
"You like me... you really like me!" Ranamon said.
"You could be a little more original!" someone in the crowd shouted.
The Pianta host was used to this. "Here is your award, Ranamon and the Evil Sailor Scouts!"
"Awww, I couldn't possibly... Give me my reward!"
She grabbed the award out of the host's hands, knocking him aside.
"I'd just like to thank all the little people I had to step on to get here!" she shouted as fake tears started falling.
"Ranamon's taking all the credit again," said Grottomon. "Don't you think so, Mercuremon? ... Mercuremon?"
Mercuremon didn't hear him, he was too busy admiring his skirt.
"You're still wearing that thing?"
Ranamon continued, "Oh, and that person that did that thing I can't remember!"
"Mercuremon? Answer me!"
"I just wanted to feel pretty," he responded.
Ranamon continued, "And the costume designer, whoever you are!"
"It was me, you moron!" shouted a random Noki from the audience.
"Wherever you are! Ah, I love this wig," she sighed and put it on.
"Stop this madness! Attention, all: Mercuremon enjoys being in a skirt!" shouted Grottomon, grabbing the microphone away from the egotistical Ranamon.
"Grottomon, you're ruining my speech!" shouted Ranamon.
She tried to punch him, but missed, and fell head-on into a camera. Static.
Kouichi was quite disturbed. "That's something that shouldn't be shown on TV..."
Meanwhile at, um... (thinks, then resorts to pulling a piece of paper out of a hat) Okay, at the 76fshf 45bddfsdf v28vaud. Oops, it's upside down. (fixes) Well, that makes more sense. Back at Isle Delfino Plaza.
The Digimon cast were attempting to get rid of their current annoyance. Luckily, a Bomb-Omb took care of that for them. Convenient, isn't it?
BOOOOOOOM!
Cue the ending of the crossover cursed chapter in three, two, one...
Suddenly, there was a crash through the roof of a nearby building.
We enter the building and we see a familiar brunette wearing red robes. He ran across the room and grabbed a jewel attached to a chain.
Some Piantas and Nokis burst in, armed with bows and arrows.
"Stop, thief!"
They shot their fire-tipped arrows at him, but he dodged them by jumping out the window. He crashed into the bushes, but got up brushed himself off, regained his composure, and continued running.
"Ha! With this jewel... I can sell it on eBay!"
From the other side of the Plaza, there's a certain blonde-haired girl wearing priestess robes, also armed with bow and arrow.
"Taku-yasha!"
She shot the arrow, pinning the boy against a nearby tree.
"AAHHH!"
Izumi got wide-eyed. "Sorry, Takuya! I was aiming for the target behind you!"
Takuya face-faulted and painfully looked towards the arrow in his left shoulder.
"You said we were using the plastic arrows!"
End of chapter 14.