A Funny Frontier Tale – Always has been the title, and always will be the title!
By Super Karoru
Chapter 16: Operation FT16: Escape From Isle Delfino
Now onward to our tale!
--
The Narrator cleared his throat, facing the camera, ready to recap the previous chapter, "With the not-so-attempt to get off the island from last chapter (which was absolutely pointless), the CCs now have a sure-fire plan to get off Isle Delfino this time. And if they don't get off this damn island that they've been stuck on since chapter ten, I'll eat this glass ceiling that's only 3 inches above my head!"
"I think you've said enough, Mr. Narrator," Karoru interrupted.
"Wait! Weren't you be chased by Lady Centipede?" the Narrator questioned.
"... I forgot about that!"
Lady Centipede suddenly burst in, foaming at the mouth, and chanting "Jewel! Meat! Jewel! Meat!"
"Noooo, I'm too young to diiiiiiie!!"
An electric spark shoots out her neck,as shefalls to the ground in a heap of metal.
Blink blink. "Well, I'll be damned. It was just a robot! Ha ha, isn't that funny, Narrator?"
The window is open with a note on the windowsill that reads, "Goodbye, world! I hope I narrated thee well! Yours no more, Narrator."
Karoru slowly turned around, noticing the readers. "Eep, just get to the story already, there's nothing to see here! Go, go!"
The camera goes into static.
--
The camera comes back into clear view on the same beach from the beginning of chapter fourteen and fifteen. We see the CCs crowding around a new map plan. Also, we observe that Takuya and Izumi are back to their normal clothes and Takuya has a very large bandage on his left shoulder.
"Okay! This time we're gonna get off the island for sure!" shouted Takuya, but then started wobbling a bit. "Ooo... too much shouting..."
He fainted from his apparent loss of blood. Everyone sighed. Izumi went to help him up.
"Well, you see... It wasn't my fault! I was aiming for the target! The target!" Izumi said, trying to defend herself.
"Riiiight."
"So what do we do..." started Kouji. All those that were awake glared at him. "... to get off the island? Ah heh."
"Well, we could go with the original plan," said Junpei.
"We had a plan?" asked Tomoki.
Neemon decided to offer his two cents, "Here are two pennies!"
Ba-bum-ching.
Everyone slapped their foreheads. Yes, even Takuya, passed out or not.
Bokomon crossed his arms seriously and said, "Well, it's apparent we need to..."
"... WE NEED TO GET THE EXPLOSIVES!" shouted Takuya, as he jumped up and scared the crap out of everyone, but then began wobbling again. "Ahh... got up too fast..." Klunk.
Everyone sighed again.
"We really need to get off this island," stated Kouji.
"You think?"
--
In the Plaza.
"Ham-Hams! Now, I ask, for the final time. Do you know where Kouji is?!" Kouichi questioned, as he loomed over the innocent hamsters threateningly.
Two Piantas passed by, witnessing the act.
"Poor boy, talking to hamsters," they muttered to each other.
The Ham-Hams were communicating to each other in their hamster language.
"Oooh, we should be helping Laura! We have to teach the viewers a good moral lesson!" said Hamtaro as he ran around the cage in a panicked frenzy.
"It's always about you, isn't it?!" demanded Boss. "It's enough you've got the whole damn show named after you!"
The other Ham-Hams gasped.
"Boss, you said a bad word," said Hamtaro.
"So?" he responded.
"Zat zis not good for ze censors to hear," commented Bijou.
"Or parents," stated Stan. "Like the soccer moms!"
"You've been corrupted!" they all shouted at Boss, as they pointed at him dramatically.
"Oh, jeez," Boss groaned.
Kouichi was looking on at the Ham-Hams.
"I wonder what they're getting so worked up about," Kouichi said as he witnessed the Ham-Hams start to advance on Boss, blood thirsty glares in their beady little hamster eyes. "Oh well, they still haven't answered my question."
--
On the other side of the island.
We head further down the beach, to see Chibi Beast Sensei (a.k.a. CBS) Vritramon packing up a suitcase.
"I hope I didn't forget anything," he said. "Let's see... sunscreen, check. Sunglasses, check. Lounge chair, yeah. "Reading" material, hee hee, check! All righty, I think that's everything. I always did travel light."
Shutumon popped out of nowhere, sneaking up behind Vritramon and scaring him half to death. "Hey, Vritra-kun!"
His screech of surprise sounded similar to a cross between a cat, a middle-aged woman who just saw a mouse, and a tire squeaking.
"Must you scare me like that?!" he asked, after regaining his composure, and turned around to face her.
"Of course!"
"Why?"
"Because I wuv you!"
Vritramon blinked. "Eh?"
They continued to stare at each other for a bit. Vritra out of bafflement, Shutu out of adoration. The dragon got bored with that easily, and continued to his packing needs.
"Look, uh... I've got packing to do, so if you don't mind..."
"Oh, Vritra, am I not good enough for you?" Shutumon gasped as she fell into Vritramon's arms, quite dramatically.
"You are definitely scaring me," responded the dumfounded Digimon.
"And so ends another feeling-filled episode of The Bold Senseis and the Beasties," A soothing, male actor's voice echoed from absolutely nowhere.
"We have got to get off this island."
--
"Do we have the explosives?" asked Takuya with eager glee, like a kid in a candy store.
"No, we are not using the explosives!" shouted the others.
"Okie dokie! Just asking."
"Sigh!"
--
Just go to the next scene switch, quit stalling! Wait, I'm the one that's stalling. ... Oops.
--
Where the CCs are!
The CCs were now skipping merrily down the lane, with linked arms singing Disney sing-a-long songs.
"NO, WE'RE NOT!"
Whatever, girlfriends!
The Chosen Children ignored the odd narration and huddled into a... huddle.
"Just leave it to me!" said Takuya. "We'll sneak off and away with super secret techniques."
"Can we just get off the island now?" groaned Kouji.
"Of course! There's a plothole right over there!" Takuya pointed to a random plothole that said: The only way to get off isle Delfino and never look back.
Everyone stared quizzically at the sudden convenience of such a plothole to appear in their easy reach in such an appropriate time.
"LET'S GO!"
They all scrambled towards the portal.
---
Inside the plotholeness of the plothole!
"Oops, I just remembered something!" Takuya stated, slapping his forehead in revelation.
"What?" asked the others.
"I did use the explosives!"
--
View of Isle Delfino.
Everything's quiet. Too quiet...
BOOOOOM!!
A giant mushroom cloud could be seen by many a passerby. OH, THE HORROR!!
We see Karoru (referring to yourself in third-person is oodles of fun!) floating along in a makeshift boat.
"My Karoru Corporations™ location on Isle Delfino may have just exploded, but anything's possible in the written word! Oh, and where will the CCs end up next, I wonder?"
The boat suddenly turned over from rapid waves. A sign from beneath the water was held up, reading: "You haven't seen the last of me! Mwah hah ha! Even though that might be a good thing."
End of chapter 16.
Where will the Chosen Children end up next? Will Karoru drown? Will I stop asking questions that the readers can't answer? It's all a mystery! Stay tuned for the next exciting chapter of A Funny Frontier Tale!