Disclaimer: In case you couldn't tell, last chapter I was kidding. I
didn't get any of them. Oh, wait, I forgot—I don't live in the REAL world!
So I do own Snape, Lucius, Draco, And Luna! Woo-hoo! Par-tay!
Author's Note: So...tired...must...write...not...promise...break...
Oh, screw it, I'm tired, but I'm writing this anyway! Look at the dedication and marvel how I ever got accepted into the lazy American society! ...Well I got news, for you: I wasn't! So there!
Have a nice day!
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
A Series of Coincidences That Just Happen to Look Like a Plot (but not so much this chapter because I am excruciatingly tired)
By: Aw, who the crap do you think it is? Mohotma Ghandi?
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Hermione, two chapters ago: "Oh." After a completely unremarkable someone told her why she had been knocked out.
Now that we're all caught up and remembered!
"Yeah. Kinda anti-climactic, but hey! We aren't even at Hogwarts yet!"
"We?" Hermione asked.
"Er—I mean—"
She was spared the confusion of answering by the fade-out to the next scene. And because I'm too tired to think up an answer for her to answer with.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Cut to an image of...(bum bum bum)...*drumroll*(doesn't the suspense just kill ya?)...VOLDEMORT'S HIDEOUT! Complete with giant sign, telling people what it is and what a great tatoo parlor it has.
Cut to the inside...Voldemort's room. And inside, we see...waitasec! This isn't scary at all! Look at that! *swings camera around* It's Voldemort...but he's hula-hooping! What kind of terror is that?
"A very bad kind, but I'll tell ya something," Lord Moldy Warts says, "It's a damn fun kind of terror! Whee!" he says, spinning the hula hoop around his arm.
He's careful to not let it touch his cute little Japanese school-girl uniform. You know, like the kind they show in anime and manga cartoons...He even has what little hair he has up in pigtails. The whole situation would be a lot funnier if...no, I give up, this is one of the funniest things I've ever seen. Or written, for that matter.
"And," the Lord of All Things Terrifying added, "It's something I'm good at naturally."
*sigh* If only it could have been Lucius...
"I heard that!" Tom Marvolo Riddle said indignantly, pulling out his wand, "Avada Kedavra!"
"...Hey!" he said after a second. "Why aren't you dead?"
Because I'm the author, genius! Jeez, why didn't I write you smart? And Lucius really would look better in drag. For that matter, he'd look a helluva lot better in that Japanese schoolgirl outfit. *gets all misty- eyed*
Moldy Warts: *gets all misty-eyed*
OK, we're leaving now!
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
"Yeah, that was just freaky, Miss Author Person," Blaise Zabini said aloud as he floated through the gigantic void. It really was stupid of Draco to tell the author to go away. Without the author, there was nothing to do!
"I know, but it was funny, right?" I said, randomly appearing.
"Yeah, I guess," Blaise said, nodding his head. "Voldemort and hula hoops," he said laughing, "that was priceless!"
"Yeah. I actually got the idea from someone else, but she said I was free to use it...ah, Maggie the cheese girl, she's the best..."
"Uh, yeah...listen, do you think you could get me out of this void? I mean, it's kinda boring," Blaise said. Man, do I need a thesaurus...
"Yeah. But what about Draco?" I asked.
"What about him?" Blaise asked.
"Point taken. Very well, no more void for you! Where would you like to be set down?"
"Uh, I'd actually love to go to the Bahamas, but I need to go to school, so I guess the Hogwarts school train, September 1997."
"Right-o, my friend," I say, blowing away with wisps of smoke as the world of his choice un-dissolves around him. What? It's better than resloves, or asolves. Neither of those make sense! ...Stop looking at me like that!
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Draco = stupid, therefore, Draco = Still in void. AHAHAHAHAHAhahahahahahahahahahahahahahaohnevermind.
"I really wish I wasn't in this giant void," Draco sighed, stating the obvious. But duh. I mean, come on, he's Draco. He's hot, but he's not that bright.
"Hey, I can read, you know!" Draco shouted angrily, ten minutes after I wrote that line, which he started reading as soon as I wrote it.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
A/N: Yeh, I said I was tired. Besides, Blaise got out of the void! We should all rejoice, for the time of prophecy has come to pass, as has all intelligent government.
Anyway.
A big hug to:
tor-and-fenris: Score six for imagined schitzophenia! I probably didn't spell that right, but who cares? Anyway. VOTE JIMMY! Jimmy gives you cookies.
Cajun Rogue: Of course I won't be mad, I'm an even more spazzy updater than you are! ...I mean...
And that was it! What is WRONG with you people? I'm funny! FUNNY I SAY! You must read! It's how things ARE! Ack! The world is coming to an end!
Oh, and I recently discovered an obsession with Blaise Zabini that I have! Yay, Blaise!
Hey, if you noticed that I'm a major loser, KEEP IT TO YOURSELF! I don't want to be TOO obvious...
Author's Note: So...tired...must...write...not...promise...break...
Oh, screw it, I'm tired, but I'm writing this anyway! Look at the dedication and marvel how I ever got accepted into the lazy American society! ...Well I got news, for you: I wasn't! So there!
Have a nice day!
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
A Series of Coincidences That Just Happen to Look Like a Plot (but not so much this chapter because I am excruciatingly tired)
By: Aw, who the crap do you think it is? Mohotma Ghandi?
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Hermione, two chapters ago: "Oh." After a completely unremarkable someone told her why she had been knocked out.
Now that we're all caught up and remembered!
"Yeah. Kinda anti-climactic, but hey! We aren't even at Hogwarts yet!"
"We?" Hermione asked.
"Er—I mean—"
She was spared the confusion of answering by the fade-out to the next scene. And because I'm too tired to think up an answer for her to answer with.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Cut to an image of...(bum bum bum)...*drumroll*(doesn't the suspense just kill ya?)...VOLDEMORT'S HIDEOUT! Complete with giant sign, telling people what it is and what a great tatoo parlor it has.
Cut to the inside...Voldemort's room. And inside, we see...waitasec! This isn't scary at all! Look at that! *swings camera around* It's Voldemort...but he's hula-hooping! What kind of terror is that?
"A very bad kind, but I'll tell ya something," Lord Moldy Warts says, "It's a damn fun kind of terror! Whee!" he says, spinning the hula hoop around his arm.
He's careful to not let it touch his cute little Japanese school-girl uniform. You know, like the kind they show in anime and manga cartoons...He even has what little hair he has up in pigtails. The whole situation would be a lot funnier if...no, I give up, this is one of the funniest things I've ever seen. Or written, for that matter.
"And," the Lord of All Things Terrifying added, "It's something I'm good at naturally."
*sigh* If only it could have been Lucius...
"I heard that!" Tom Marvolo Riddle said indignantly, pulling out his wand, "Avada Kedavra!"
"...Hey!" he said after a second. "Why aren't you dead?"
Because I'm the author, genius! Jeez, why didn't I write you smart? And Lucius really would look better in drag. For that matter, he'd look a helluva lot better in that Japanese schoolgirl outfit. *gets all misty- eyed*
Moldy Warts: *gets all misty-eyed*
OK, we're leaving now!
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
"Yeah, that was just freaky, Miss Author Person," Blaise Zabini said aloud as he floated through the gigantic void. It really was stupid of Draco to tell the author to go away. Without the author, there was nothing to do!
"I know, but it was funny, right?" I said, randomly appearing.
"Yeah, I guess," Blaise said, nodding his head. "Voldemort and hula hoops," he said laughing, "that was priceless!"
"Yeah. I actually got the idea from someone else, but she said I was free to use it...ah, Maggie the cheese girl, she's the best..."
"Uh, yeah...listen, do you think you could get me out of this void? I mean, it's kinda boring," Blaise said. Man, do I need a thesaurus...
"Yeah. But what about Draco?" I asked.
"What about him?" Blaise asked.
"Point taken. Very well, no more void for you! Where would you like to be set down?"
"Uh, I'd actually love to go to the Bahamas, but I need to go to school, so I guess the Hogwarts school train, September 1997."
"Right-o, my friend," I say, blowing away with wisps of smoke as the world of his choice un-dissolves around him. What? It's better than resloves, or asolves. Neither of those make sense! ...Stop looking at me like that!
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Draco = stupid, therefore, Draco = Still in void. AHAHAHAHAHAhahahahahahahahahahahahahahaohnevermind.
"I really wish I wasn't in this giant void," Draco sighed, stating the obvious. But duh. I mean, come on, he's Draco. He's hot, but he's not that bright.
"Hey, I can read, you know!" Draco shouted angrily, ten minutes after I wrote that line, which he started reading as soon as I wrote it.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
A/N: Yeh, I said I was tired. Besides, Blaise got out of the void! We should all rejoice, for the time of prophecy has come to pass, as has all intelligent government.
Anyway.
A big hug to:
tor-and-fenris: Score six for imagined schitzophenia! I probably didn't spell that right, but who cares? Anyway. VOTE JIMMY! Jimmy gives you cookies.
Cajun Rogue: Of course I won't be mad, I'm an even more spazzy updater than you are! ...I mean...
And that was it! What is WRONG with you people? I'm funny! FUNNY I SAY! You must read! It's how things ARE! Ack! The world is coming to an end!
Oh, and I recently discovered an obsession with Blaise Zabini that I have! Yay, Blaise!
Hey, if you noticed that I'm a major loser, KEEP IT TO YOURSELF! I don't want to be TOO obvious...