Hey wow I got my lazy self around to writing another chapter for this thing. Anywho I STILL don't own none of these people. Probably never will. Ah, well. C'est la vie.
Hey look I'm being user friendly. Here's a list of the abbrev. for the Phantoms.
ALW- Andrew Lloyd Webber
DS- David Staller
HL- Herbert Lom
POTM- Phantom of the Mall
CR- Claude Rains
LC- Lon Chaney
RE- Robert Englund
POTP- Phantom of the Paradise
A- Animated
W- Wishbone
CT- Canary Trainer
DB- David Bischoff
DA- Dario Argento
POM- Phantom of Manhatten
POTA- Phantom of the Auditorium
YK- Yeston/Kopit
CD- Charles Dance
O- Original novel
SK- Susan Kay
Hope that helps. :) Now on with the story!
(It is the morning after the "Raoul Massacre and Pizza Party" all the Phantoms have gathered by the lake once more to discuss the events of the previous evening)
ALW: Oh my. This is the last time I ever let the young one pick where we have dinner! (Glares at POTM)
POTM: Look dude, it's not MY fault you got one with extra jalapenjos!
SK: I should get out more. Pizza seems to have changed a lot since I was in Italy. It was like a completely different thing.
CR: No offense, but I somehow doubt they had taco pizzas in Italy when you were there, Erik.
DS: I can cook better.
ALW: Will you just shut up for once in your miserable life! (groans and clutches his stomach)
CD: I say. You don't look so good.
Phan: (popping out of nowhere) Here's some Tums. They'll make everything better. I got some chocolate too if you want. It's a little melted though.
O: (to the Phan) What are you still doing down here?
Phan: Ummm...I'm hiding from the cops.
YK: Why?
Phan: You know that chandelier that's hanging in the auditorium?
YK: Yes.
Phan: It's kinda not hanging there anymore....and Lord Andy kinda has a new hat....
RE: (laughs) I like this kid. Can we keep her?
O: Abosuloutely not! You don't know where she's been!
CD: Wait a second. Scarface here said something nice!
RE: Don't get used to it, bastard.
CD: Hey now!
RE: It's TRUE isn't it. You were born out of wedlock. Your mamma was nothing but a two bit--
CD: (attacks RE assisted by the YK and SK versions) How dare you!
(Another large fight drags all the Phantoms in)
Phan: (sighs and leans against the wall waiting until they're finished) Are you DONE yet??
CD: He insulted my mother!
Phan: Oh God. All any of you ever do is fight and bicker with each other! Can't you all at least TRY to get along? I love you all and it drives me insane when you keep fighting! (thwacks RE upside the head)
RE: Now you're in trouble little missy!
LC: (holding RE back) Now now. The girl has a point. We must be able to do something more productive.
DB: I know! I know! Let's have a game!
A: Oh yes. A game would be lovely!
SK: He IS kidding, isn't he? Please tell me he's kidding.
POTP: I don't think he is.
CT: You know what I think?
W: You're going to tell us anyway.
CT: I think we should go back to the fop house. I don't think we got them all.
HL: My God man! Haven't we shed enough blood!
RE: Not nearly!
DS: Who are you? Cruella deVille? Don't you have enough skin to keep that ugly mug of yours up fo a while.
RE: Not like you got room to talk, freak.
CT: We should be going back there, I tell you! They'll have gotten that meddling Holmes! Then we'll be in real trouble! I tell you we should go back and kill them all! We have to--(incoherant muttering as SK snatches his mask)
SK: Useful trick. Now if I could only keep him from pacing up and down while I'm trying to sleep....
RE: I wouldn't worry anyhow. We got 'em good. (picks up Richard's head *note: Richard was the Raoul for RE for those who haven't seen that movie*) Anyone want some soup.
ALL: NO!
(However, CT is right. They didn't get all the Raouls. There are still 4. Swan, Anatole, Inspecteur Dolbert, and a garden varietry foppish Raoul. They missed the massacre because at the time they were all out getting mocha lattes)
Swan: (Looking around) Damn. A massacre. I guess there goes my idea for a Christmas special at the Paradise now that it's been done.
Dolbert: You were gonna kill people????
Fop: That's so....icky.
Swan: I give the crowd what they want. I can't help it if what they want happens to be blood.
Anatole: Ummm...riiiight.
Dolbert: Perhaps we should take inventory to see if the rouges stole anything.
Anatole: (grumbling) I could've thought of that!
(they all start looking around)
Swan: (panicked) They've taken my films!!!
Fop: Ok, so you'll have to buy Faces of Death again. (shudder) What's the big deal?
Swan: I thought I explained the importance of those films. If they get destroyed or I don't watch them every day I'm toast.
Fop: Huh?
Swan: I made a deal with the devil you moron!!
Fop: Oh, like that guy in the opera Christine is always yapping about?
Anatole: You mean Faust?
Fop: Um, sure. Ok.
Dolbert: I don't understand her fixation with this singing thing. MY work is SO much more interesting.
Anatole: Get over yourself.
Fop: I KNOW! This whole theatre thing is so totally benieth me. And it draws Christine's attentions away from more important things.
Swan: Such as?
Fop: Like one time when I went to show her my killer new manicure, she just wouldn't shut UP! (imitating Christine) 'Blah blah blah, opera! Blah blah blah, Diva! Blah blah blah, the little voices in my head!'
Swan: (thinking) Hmmm...Christine....Pretty, nice voice, kinda ditzy?
Dolbert: Yeah, that's her.
Swan: (smugly) I've done her.
Dolbert/Fop/Anatole: WHAT??!??!??!
Swan: What? Like everyone HASN'T. I know she's done at LEAST 5 of those arch-enemy Phantom things of yours.
Fop: Ew.
Swan: Come ON! Get with the programme. (to Anatole) Have you done her?
Anatole: Umm...well....yes...but--
Swan: Ok. (to Dolbert) Have YOU done her?
Dolbert: (embarrassed) Yes.
Swan: (to Fop) Have you done her?
Fop: Uhh...well no.
Swan: Seriously?
Fop: I came real close....but....I couldn't figure out how to do it.
(All the other Raoul's laugh at him)
(However the Raouls aren't the only problems the Phantoms have. The rejects have gotten together as well. POM, DA, and the Phantom of the Auditorium have all gathered together to seek vengance.)
DA: They think they're all that just because they have all the little phans flocking around them.
POM: Yeah! Just because they never dressed as a clown!
POTA: Hate to say it. But dressing as a clown really is pretty stupid.
DA: Yeah.
POTA: And at least you two got in the ORIGINAL phic. The stupid author didn't even think enough of me to put me in there. Just in this dumb sequel!
DA: Trust me. You didn't wanna be there.
POM: It wasn't pretty.
POTA: What really bites my cheese is that stupid Phantom of the Mall is with them! What's up with THAT?
DA: No kidding. You know what we gotta do.
POTA: What?
DA: We gotta take 'em out! If we get rid of them, then WE'LL be the only Phantoms and all the phans will love US!
POM: But we're outnumbered. REALLY outnumbered.
POTA: What about the Raouls? A lot of them would just love the chance to ice most of those Phantoms.
DA: Yes! Let's go get us some vengance for being left out of the spotlight!
(They all set out in search of Raouls for backup)
Well kiddies, that's all the time we have for this edition. If you like it tell me and I'll write more. If not. Then we'll just forget this little sequel ever happened.
Hey look I'm being user friendly. Here's a list of the abbrev. for the Phantoms.
ALW- Andrew Lloyd Webber
DS- David Staller
HL- Herbert Lom
POTM- Phantom of the Mall
CR- Claude Rains
LC- Lon Chaney
RE- Robert Englund
POTP- Phantom of the Paradise
A- Animated
W- Wishbone
CT- Canary Trainer
DB- David Bischoff
DA- Dario Argento
POM- Phantom of Manhatten
POTA- Phantom of the Auditorium
YK- Yeston/Kopit
CD- Charles Dance
O- Original novel
SK- Susan Kay
Hope that helps. :) Now on with the story!
(It is the morning after the "Raoul Massacre and Pizza Party" all the Phantoms have gathered by the lake once more to discuss the events of the previous evening)
ALW: Oh my. This is the last time I ever let the young one pick where we have dinner! (Glares at POTM)
POTM: Look dude, it's not MY fault you got one with extra jalapenjos!
SK: I should get out more. Pizza seems to have changed a lot since I was in Italy. It was like a completely different thing.
CR: No offense, but I somehow doubt they had taco pizzas in Italy when you were there, Erik.
DS: I can cook better.
ALW: Will you just shut up for once in your miserable life! (groans and clutches his stomach)
CD: I say. You don't look so good.
Phan: (popping out of nowhere) Here's some Tums. They'll make everything better. I got some chocolate too if you want. It's a little melted though.
O: (to the Phan) What are you still doing down here?
Phan: Ummm...I'm hiding from the cops.
YK: Why?
Phan: You know that chandelier that's hanging in the auditorium?
YK: Yes.
Phan: It's kinda not hanging there anymore....and Lord Andy kinda has a new hat....
RE: (laughs) I like this kid. Can we keep her?
O: Abosuloutely not! You don't know where she's been!
CD: Wait a second. Scarface here said something nice!
RE: Don't get used to it, bastard.
CD: Hey now!
RE: It's TRUE isn't it. You were born out of wedlock. Your mamma was nothing but a two bit--
CD: (attacks RE assisted by the YK and SK versions) How dare you!
(Another large fight drags all the Phantoms in)
Phan: (sighs and leans against the wall waiting until they're finished) Are you DONE yet??
CD: He insulted my mother!
Phan: Oh God. All any of you ever do is fight and bicker with each other! Can't you all at least TRY to get along? I love you all and it drives me insane when you keep fighting! (thwacks RE upside the head)
RE: Now you're in trouble little missy!
LC: (holding RE back) Now now. The girl has a point. We must be able to do something more productive.
DB: I know! I know! Let's have a game!
A: Oh yes. A game would be lovely!
SK: He IS kidding, isn't he? Please tell me he's kidding.
POTP: I don't think he is.
CT: You know what I think?
W: You're going to tell us anyway.
CT: I think we should go back to the fop house. I don't think we got them all.
HL: My God man! Haven't we shed enough blood!
RE: Not nearly!
DS: Who are you? Cruella deVille? Don't you have enough skin to keep that ugly mug of yours up fo a while.
RE: Not like you got room to talk, freak.
CT: We should be going back there, I tell you! They'll have gotten that meddling Holmes! Then we'll be in real trouble! I tell you we should go back and kill them all! We have to--(incoherant muttering as SK snatches his mask)
SK: Useful trick. Now if I could only keep him from pacing up and down while I'm trying to sleep....
RE: I wouldn't worry anyhow. We got 'em good. (picks up Richard's head *note: Richard was the Raoul for RE for those who haven't seen that movie*) Anyone want some soup.
ALL: NO!
(However, CT is right. They didn't get all the Raouls. There are still 4. Swan, Anatole, Inspecteur Dolbert, and a garden varietry foppish Raoul. They missed the massacre because at the time they were all out getting mocha lattes)
Swan: (Looking around) Damn. A massacre. I guess there goes my idea for a Christmas special at the Paradise now that it's been done.
Dolbert: You were gonna kill people????
Fop: That's so....icky.
Swan: I give the crowd what they want. I can't help it if what they want happens to be blood.
Anatole: Ummm...riiiight.
Dolbert: Perhaps we should take inventory to see if the rouges stole anything.
Anatole: (grumbling) I could've thought of that!
(they all start looking around)
Swan: (panicked) They've taken my films!!!
Fop: Ok, so you'll have to buy Faces of Death again. (shudder) What's the big deal?
Swan: I thought I explained the importance of those films. If they get destroyed or I don't watch them every day I'm toast.
Fop: Huh?
Swan: I made a deal with the devil you moron!!
Fop: Oh, like that guy in the opera Christine is always yapping about?
Anatole: You mean Faust?
Fop: Um, sure. Ok.
Dolbert: I don't understand her fixation with this singing thing. MY work is SO much more interesting.
Anatole: Get over yourself.
Fop: I KNOW! This whole theatre thing is so totally benieth me. And it draws Christine's attentions away from more important things.
Swan: Such as?
Fop: Like one time when I went to show her my killer new manicure, she just wouldn't shut UP! (imitating Christine) 'Blah blah blah, opera! Blah blah blah, Diva! Blah blah blah, the little voices in my head!'
Swan: (thinking) Hmmm...Christine....Pretty, nice voice, kinda ditzy?
Dolbert: Yeah, that's her.
Swan: (smugly) I've done her.
Dolbert/Fop/Anatole: WHAT??!??!??!
Swan: What? Like everyone HASN'T. I know she's done at LEAST 5 of those arch-enemy Phantom things of yours.
Fop: Ew.
Swan: Come ON! Get with the programme. (to Anatole) Have you done her?
Anatole: Umm...well....yes...but--
Swan: Ok. (to Dolbert) Have YOU done her?
Dolbert: (embarrassed) Yes.
Swan: (to Fop) Have you done her?
Fop: Uhh...well no.
Swan: Seriously?
Fop: I came real close....but....I couldn't figure out how to do it.
(All the other Raoul's laugh at him)
(However the Raouls aren't the only problems the Phantoms have. The rejects have gotten together as well. POM, DA, and the Phantom of the Auditorium have all gathered together to seek vengance.)
DA: They think they're all that just because they have all the little phans flocking around them.
POM: Yeah! Just because they never dressed as a clown!
POTA: Hate to say it. But dressing as a clown really is pretty stupid.
DA: Yeah.
POTA: And at least you two got in the ORIGINAL phic. The stupid author didn't even think enough of me to put me in there. Just in this dumb sequel!
DA: Trust me. You didn't wanna be there.
POM: It wasn't pretty.
POTA: What really bites my cheese is that stupid Phantom of the Mall is with them! What's up with THAT?
DA: No kidding. You know what we gotta do.
POTA: What?
DA: We gotta take 'em out! If we get rid of them, then WE'LL be the only Phantoms and all the phans will love US!
POM: But we're outnumbered. REALLY outnumbered.
POTA: What about the Raouls? A lot of them would just love the chance to ice most of those Phantoms.
DA: Yes! Let's go get us some vengance for being left out of the spotlight!
(They all set out in search of Raouls for backup)
Well kiddies, that's all the time we have for this edition. If you like it tell me and I'll write more. If not. Then we'll just forget this little sequel ever happened.