AN: Finally! I've gotten around to updating!!! I'm sure you're all
cheering right now! *pauses, but hears only crickets* I said......I'M
SURE YOU'RE ALL CHEERING RIGHT NOW! *glares at audiance....before they
burst out cheering* Thank you!

Lawyer 69: You know, that's not the best way to treat your possible
reviewers.

Shut up. You're supposed to be torturing me, not lecturing me.

Lawyer 752: She's right you know...*takes out a large, pointy object* Say
it or we shall be forced to poke you repeatedly!!

Alright.....Inuyasha or anything remotely connected to it is not owned
by me.

Lawyer 36: Good girl


Ah...and this is dedicated to Aeja! She motivated me to finish this
after she told her reviewers to read my insignificant little story!! I
feel so honored....





All's Fair in Love and Reality Shows



Chapter 5



Bus Hopping and Purple Pineapples





"Alright, I think I've built the tension up enough." Sesshoumaru
glanced at the anxious faces around him. "Your first challenge is to
sell one-hundred and fifty items of your picking. Each item is fifty
cents each." Hushed mutters sounded from the group. Shippou looked
nervously over at Rin, who gave him a big grin. Comforted, but a little
weirded out by her happy-go-luckyness, he looked over at Kagome. She
seemed as nervous as him. Come to think of it, everyone seemed as
nervous as him. "The way you will choose your items is have one member
from each team select a number. Each number has a corresponding item."
Sesshomaru held out a large top hat, shaking it slightly, as if to say
"Don't worry, there's actually paper in here. I'm not just being weird."

"I shall go and get ours, Sweet Kagome," Kouga grinned at Kagome.

"Oh, uh, sure. Whatever." Kagome looked distractedly over his shoulder
at Sango.

"Let me Lady Sango!!! I shall go and get it!" Miroku was begging Sango
to let him get it. Sango looked rather cross, shaking him off and
replying angrily:

"No way! With your luck, you'll probably go and pick some number
like....44….and we'll get stuck with pink fuzzy bunny
slippers!" Giggling, Kagome directed her gaze from Sango and Miroku to
Shippou and Rin.

"May Rin get our paper Shippou-chan?"

"Uh...sure Rin." Shippou colored slightly as she hugged him and skipped
up to Sesshomaru.

"Hey, wench, did the wolf go and get our slip of paper?" Kagome
whipped around to come face to face with Inuyasha.

"Uh, yeah. And I have a name, you know...."

"Yeah, isn't it Katie or something?"

"KAGOME! KA-GO-ME! Use it!" Her cheeks burned as she remembered last
night, and she added, "Oh, and next time, lock the bathroom door."

Inuyasha winked roguishly. "Oh, come on, you know you liked it..."

Kagome snorted. "Yeah, right. I would rather have a ceiling fan hack
off my limbs than see you shirtless again!" And I'm totally
lying....she thought to herself.

Inuyasha opened his mouth to retort, but he was cut short by Kouga's
entrance. "Uh....guys.....look what we've got." Kagome and Inuyasha
gaped at the contents of the cart Kouga was pulling behind him.

"Purple....pineapples?" Inuyasha snarled and grabbed Kouga's collar.
"You...got...us...purple...pineapples...."

"Inuyasha....go easy on him....it's not his fault...look around you!"
She pointed in Sango and Miroku's direction, where Sango was wailing,
"I GOT NUMBER 44! IT WAS PINK FUZZY BUNNY SLIPPERS!!" Then Kagome
pointed to Kikyou and Naraku, where they stood puzzling over their
tangerine teapots. She reluctantly pointed to Shippou and Rin, who were
staring happily at their good fortune: a mound of candy bars.

"But purple pineapples?" Kouga even looked skeptically at Kagome. "Who
the hell is going to buy purple pineapples?"

"A collector?"

Inuyasha scowled at her. "Funny, I agree with Wimpy Wolf over here. No
one in their right mind is going to buy a purple pineapple! Did you
forget that we have to sell A HUNDRED AND FIFTY?!"

"Yes," she replied meekly.

"Alright constants, on your mark, get set, GO!" Sesshomaru's shout
declared the start of their race. Shippou and Rin raced around the
lobby, stopping every hotel employee and visitor. Kikyou and Naraku
staggered out the door and down the street. Miroku was desperately
trying to pull Sango, who was still sobbing over their horrible luck,
out the door.

Kouga turned to Kagome and Inuyasha. "Alright, let's do this."


~*~ ^_^ ~*~


"Excuse me sir! Would you like to buy a purple---no? Oh, alright."

"Look, it's simple. You give me two measly quarters, and in exchange,
I'll give you a pineapple!"

"BUY A PINEAPPLE OR I'LL RIP YOUR THROAT OUT!" Kagome looked over at
Kouga, using his wily ways and charm to convince three people to buy
their fruit. Inuyasha, on the other hand, had....convinced.....sixteen
people to buy them. Using brute force, of course.


She, Kagome, however, had not managed to sell a single one. "Time for
plan B," she muttered. She tracked down a huge group of twenty guys.
"Hey, you! Over there! Buy one of my pineapples and I'll give you my
number!" She winked seductively.

"Alright baby!" They rushed over and purchased their fruit. "Now
where's our extra surprise?" one called.

"Oh, right. Here you go!" She hastily handed him a scribbled number on the
back of a business card one of the guys gave her.

"Hey, thanks baby! We'll call you!" They sniggered and took off.

"What the fuck was that?!" Inuyasha stormed over. "Why'd you give those
jerks your number?"

"I didn't. I gave them the number of the pizza place downtown. They're
going to get plenty of business thanks to me..."

~*~ ^_^ ~*~


"Would you like to buy some chocolate, to help a good cause?" Shippou
and Rin were parked outside of one of the hotel rooms, where they put
on their most innocent faces for the old lady standing at the door.

"Of course dears! How many do you have left?"

"We've got eight boxes left," replied Shippou innocently.

"I'll take the lot! You are so ADORABLE!" She reached out to engulf him
and Rin in a bug huge, before handing them a fifty dollar bill. "Keep
the change sweetums."

"Thank you ma'am!" Rin grinned at her.

"See, what'd I tell you Rin? Our cuteness is over powering!"

"Rin is glad to be working with you Shippou-chan!" She hugged him.

"Uh....yeah.....let's get back to Sesshomaru." he blushed again,
thinking that all of the blood rushing to his cheeks wasn't
healthy......


~*~ ^_^ ~*~

"Look Naraku....all we have to do is go to that antique shop down the
road, convince them that they're antiques, and hurry back to the hotel!
It's foolproof!"

"Except for the whole antiques being old thing. These teapots are brand
new!"

Kikyou looked thoughtfully around them, before picking up an armful of
dirt and scattering it over the mountain of teapots. "There. They'll
never know the difference. Now come on!"


~*~^_^~*~


"Look! A bus! I've got an idea!" Kouga motioned Kagome and Inuyasha
over to him. Their pile of pineapples had shrunk drastically to only 63
pieces of fruit left. Inuyasha had scared 23 others out of their mind,
Kouga had laid on the charm and coaxed 16 people to buy them, and
Kagome had given the pizza place 24 new customers.

"He has an idea? What a shock!" Inuyasha feigned amazement.

"Shut up idiot. I don't see you coming up with any ideas."

"Thank you, Kagome. Now, as I was saying.....I think we should hop buses
all over town and sell them on the bus, that way they can't run away
from us." Kouga smiled proudly as he delivered them his idea.

"..........Bus hopping?"

"Yes, bus hopping!"

Kagome looked thoughtfully at the bus behind them. "You know......it
just might work......"


~*~ ^_^~*~

"See? i told you it would work out!"

"I must admit, Houshi......I didn't think selling the slippers BACK to
the department stores would work...."

"See? You just have to trust me!"

"I guess you're right....GET YOUR HAND AWAY FROM ME!!" *slap* "TRUST
YOU?! HAH!! I'D RATHER TRUST A RAVENOUS SQUIRREL NOT TO EAT ME!!" Sango stormed off in the direction of the hotel.

"Damn.....I was so close too.......Sango!! Wait up!!! I'm sorry!!"


~*~ ^_^ ~*~

"Look, these teapots have been in my family for ages!"

"Miss, you can't really expect me to believe that 150 dirty, tangerine
teapots have been in your family for generations..." The clerk behind
the desk looked down his nose at Kikyou.

"Alright...here. We don't expect you to believe us..." Naraku stepped
up and pulled 500 dollars from his pocket. "But maybe you could
pretend...." He slipped the bills towards the man. The clerk eyed them
hungrily.

"How much do I owe you?"


~*~^__^~*~

"Look madam...it's a long bus ride until your stop...and I'm not going
to leave this seat until you buy a pineapple." Inuyasha folded his arms
across his chest and sat down next to an agitated middle-aged lady.

"Fine!! JUST LEAVE!!!"

"Pleasure doing business with you!" He saluted her and moseyed over to
Kagome. He caught her smug glance. "Alright...so the wolf had ONE good
idea..."

"Yup! And thanks to him...the fruit is all gone! Now go and apologize
for being so rude to him...come on! Shoo!"

"WHAT?! I'M NOT GOING TO SAY SORRY TO THAT JERK!"

"What has he ever done to you that makes you hate him so much?!"

"NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS BITCH!!" Kagome noticed the sharpness of his
words and wisely dropped it.

"Fine, fine. Now let's go find him and get back to the hotel......."

~*~ ^_^ ~*~

An: WHAHAHAAHAHAHA!!! There I go again....on my short chapterness. Ah,
well.

Wheee!! To Zero27.....I took your advice and focused on others!!! Thank
you!!!

As to all of my other reviewers...thank you so much for all of the
encouragement!! Couldn't do it without you! Hugs to all!!! I'll be back
soon with another chapter....hopefully....