Hermione30: Hey, there you are!

Starhawk9: Yeah, he sure didn't take me far. (The Phant-ham's cave is only a block away—at Farmer Brown's house) So what are you going to do save me? (Starhawk9 is presently wearing a bride's dress and a lot of rope)

Hermione30: Oh, that. You'll see. (Phant-ham comes in)

Phant-ham: You! You shall not take my bride! I'll kung-fu you to death first! *breaks a brick with his head to demonstrate his ability*

Hermione30: Oh, yeah? Well, how're going to deal with this? *Pulls out a large bottle of BBQ sauce and a pork skewer, otherwise known as: "The Pork Fork"*

Phant-ham: AH! Cannibals! RUN!!!!!!!!!!!!! *runs away, squealing like the wittle piggy he is*

Hermione30: I win. And he went wee-wee-wee all the way home.

Starhawk9: Yay! You saved me! Now, could you untie me please? *wriggles a little*

Hermione30: No.

Starhawk9: grrrrr…. *stands up, and kicks Hermione30 in the head, since apparently, the Phant-ham doesn't know much about knots*

Hermione30: Gee…look at all the pretty colors…*falls onto the floor, unconscious*

Starhawk9: Okay, while I dress Hermione30 up to look like a clown, read this final chapter to the story!

"Ginny, what have you done?"

Why was I even asking this; I already knew. I mean, how couldn't I know? I mean, one minute I'm just sitting in the common room crying my eyes out, drowning my memories of Hermione in butterbeer, and the next thing I know, I'm Viktor Krum!!! And who gave me that butterbeer, who!?

But still, Ginny looked pretty terrified. She was staring at me with eyes the size of Quaffles, like what had happened even surprised her. But after a couple minutes of us staring each other down, she gulped and started to speak.

"Okay Ron, promise you won't kill me." Her voice was quivery, but it became bolder as she continued, "I put Polyjuice Potion in your butterbeer. See—"

"But WHY!? Of course it's Polyjuice Potion, I look like VIKTOR KRUM, FOR CRYING IN A BUCKET! But what, exactly, is the point of this madness!? WHY!?"

Then this small, extremely high-pitched voice piped up behind me.

"She did it to help you, sir." I wheeled around and saw a small house-elf scamper towards Ginny.

"Dobby?" If possible, he looked more scared than Ginny.

"Please, sir. Let her explain, sir. She has a plan, sir!" His green eyes were bulging as he pointed toward my sister.

"A plan? Excuse me, but did I hear you right? A plan!? You mean this isn't it?"

Ginny didn't sound like she wanted to be saying this kind of thing, but she did anyway.

"I know about you and Hermione. I mean, c'mon, don't looked so shocked, Ron. Puh-lease. It's the most obvious thing in the world that you're in love with her. Now she hates you because of 'Vicky', as quote my darling older brother. And since you are a complete blockhead when it comes to these matters, I thought I'd take your happiness into my own hands."

"BY TURNING ME INTO VICKY!?"

"Of course, Ron. As Viktor Krum, you have complete access to Hermione's thoughts and feelings, since she's willing to talk to Krum as he actually listens! C'mon, man! Use your brain and think of the possibilities!"

That silenced me for a minute, and then it set me to thinking. Possibilities…

No, no. She doesn't mean.... Does she? I brought my—no, scratch that—Vicky's hand up to my—no—Vicky's mouth. He's got very thin lips, you know.

Ginny smiled in satisfaction. "Yeah. That."

"B-b-buh?"

"Yeah, I know you don't know how to act like Vicky. We've got a little time to fix that. But we have to get to work."

************************************************************************

About a half hour later, I knew more than I ever wanted to know about being Viktor Krum. How he walked, how he talked, how he ate, what his shoe size was…How on earth did Ginny learn all this!? No, wait. I don't wanna know. Then Ginny shoved me out of the common room, after telling me where I could probably find Hermione.

Man, Ginny's confidence is infectious: I really believed this could work—up until I got to about one hundred feet away from the library. Then I started thinking again. And it was not about good things.

 No, she still hates me. Especially after I pull this kind of stunt. She'll never talk to me again!

I had my hand on the library door, and then I froze.

No. I'm not going to do this. I'm just going back to my room and cry until I get my body back. And then I'm going to cry some more.

 My mind made up, I turned around and headed for the common room, but I tripped over something.

"Ow—Dobby! What are you doing?" Dobby looked mean as raised really long, creepy fingers at me.

"Miss thought you might do this, so she sent me. Now go in there, sir, and do it."

I know this is sad, but I was actually afraid of a house-elf right then. Harry had told me what those fingers could do and I did not want to be at the wrong end of them. So, as you can guess, I went in.

There she was, at the farthest table from the door. The sun from the window was caught in her hair, which was falling over one eye. The other eye was bright and a milky brown, shot with silvery tears, and she was scribbling something with her slim right hand. The sight made my heart leap up into my throat. It kept me from breathing normally.

Wow, she's fine. But why's she crying? If that Krum character's hurt her, I'LL KILL HIM!!!!!

Hermione looked up, wiping at her eyes. Suddenly wanting to be a tear, I couldn't help but keep staring at her hand, but before my brain could get lost in that thought, she saw him.

"Viktor?"

"WHERE!?"

"Viktor, are you okay?" she looked puzzled

Oops.

"Um, yeah. Sorry, I'm a little tired. Herm-own-ninny, you're crying."  I almost said Hermione…guess Viktor can't say it cause of his stupid accent.

She walked toward me so she wouldn't have to shout across the library and tick off Pincer—I mean Pince. "Yeah. Yeah, I am." She stared thoughtfully at the tears on her hand,

"Do you need to talk about it?"

"Yeah, I do. Why don't come over here—" she grabbed my arm and led me over to the table she was at before. A huge tingle shot up and down my spine.

We sat down. "Now tell me, what's wrong?"

Those huge eyes filled up with tears again. Oh, man. Oh, man. Oh, man! God, please don't let me freak out at those eyes. Why haven't I looked at them before?

"Oh, Viktor!" she sobbed, "It's Ron. He hates me because I went to the Yule Ball with you and now we're not talking and oh, Viktor!" she fell onto my chest and let herself go.

Now this was not what I was expecting. I made her cry? This clinched it. I had to do something, so I gently held her head in my—no—Viktor's hands and lifted it up.

"Herm-own-ninny. It's okay, I'm here for you."

Hermione stopped crying immediately and stared. Her eyes were huge, but not like she was scared or angry at what I said.

This was it.

I leaned forward—she didn't move away. Closer and closer we came, until her breath was mingling with mine. Hers was nice—like cinnamon.

Our lips met, and…well, let's just put it this way—the tingling in my spine was nothing like this. Her lips were so soft, and her hands were in my hair, and soon I couldn't think about anything else .

Until…I felt a slight bubbling sensation somewhere in the stomach region. It spread to my arms and legs, and I started to shrink.

No. NO! not now, anytime but now…

I kept shrinking, and I know she could feel it—she froze as the hair around her hands was sucked back into my skull, as the hand on her cheek shriveled back into being mine.

We pulled away, and her eyes opened to look at me—not Krum—me—Ron Weasley.

And then she smiled.

"You're good at that."

That completely staggered me. "Gah?"

"Yep. Gah," And she pulled me back in.

But right before I lost myself in the making out, I saw Ginny at the door, smiling at me, with Dobby hopping and grinning at her side.

Thank you.

And then they were gone.