A BIT LATER
The moonlight would be gracing the insides of the mansion with its faint, romantic light, of it wasn't for the already turned on lights in there.
The night had finally come, but it seemed to be on its very beginning yet. Logan's mother-in-law had prepared everyone for a night-time feast with Italian goodies and the tender smells coming out of the kitchen were the best available proof for that.
Rogue was the one responsible for the homemade pizza, and she seemed to pose a damn good job up to the time. She was pretty proud of herself too. She also had an apron around her waist, willing to show off how much of a prominent cook and household she was going to be.
In the meanwhile, Jean was getting the spaghetti boiled in order to make an authentic, traditional pasta recipe come true. Herself, she already had some experience with cooking so she didn't need anyone to order her around.
Elisa wasn't in the kitchen at the time. She had gone upstairs, freed Cornutino from his cage and taken him for a walk at the garden. Gambit had gone with her as well, in order to control the mentally unstable cat with more ease. Like a leash wouldn't have been enough.
At that time, the phone rang.
Thus, Rogue found a great opportunity to abandon the cooking for a bit, so she hastily walked towards it and answered with a sweet voice:
"Helloooo?"
"Hello Marie..." a spooky electronically-altered voice came from the other side of the line...
"Who's there?" she asked, her voice staggering between irritation and worry...
"Guessssssss..."
"Who IS it?" she said, this time only irritation colouring the sounds coming through her mouth.
"What's your favourite porn movie?"
"Ehmm... Ah don't watch that kind of stuff. Who are you anyway?"
"Someone who KNOWS." whoever it was, he was now trying to sound more eerie.
"What...what...? What do ya WANT from me?" the mysterious man on the phone seemed to have managed to break her defences...
However Rogue hadn't lost her control as she seemed to have...Secretly, she had called out for Jean to link her telepathically with Logan.
[Logan, would ya do me a favour...? Could ya track Bobby an' tell me where he is...?]
[Wasn't he supposed to be sleeping?]
[Yeah, but probably not anymore...call it a hunch. Now would ya?]
[Sure. Gimme one minute.]
"I want you to confess to Logan how you sneak away every single one of the tapes of his porn stash and watch them in your own luxury. Sneaky pervert."
"When Ah find, you, Ah'll kill you with mah own-ungloved-hands, be sure of that!"
"Wrong answer. Now 'she' gets it."
"Hey, wait! Who is 'she-" Rogue's question was interrupted by the sound of something getting ripped. Probably the magnetic tape of a video. Oh no!
"Let's see how you will now explain this to Logan when he finds his favourite film 'Madripoor nymphos' in this condition."
Holy shit! that was Rogue's favourite film too! it featured some splendid Asian studs with...oh, well, not the right time for such description. Thankfully, at that moment Logan came back and slipped her a piece of paper with the words 'in your room's closet' written on it.
"Here, talk to Logan and explain to him yourself...mystery man." she said to the speaker, then handed it to Logan and bolted upstairs with a vengeance.
"Hello...?" Logan said inquiringly to the man on the other side of the line.
"Hello Logan... where is our little perverted white-streaked girl?"
"Oh, never mind about that...soon, other stuff will be on your mind..."
"What do you mean?" the altered voice now sounded concerned.
Then a noise of intense footsteps started making itself clear from the background of the mysterious voice's side of the line.
Logan only had to add his bottom line to the desperate sounding man on the phone :
"OOOOOH Your gonna ge---t it!"
An "Uh-Oh!" was heard through the line and then a closet door swinging open, and the voice of a frustrated Rogue yelling: "DRAKE!!!"
Logan was happy that he only had acoustic connection to the whole scene, because actually watching what happened would give him nightmares worse than the Weapon X-related ones.
He hung up the phone a lot before Bobby's screams were finished.
***************************************************************
MINUTES LATER
Rogue came down the stairs, feeling A LOT better, almost refreshed.
After all, kicking ass was always refreshing. The fact that it had been a duct tape that had been ripped and not 'Madripoor Nymphos' also helped a bit.
She walked past the rec room, where Logan and Gina were lounging on the couch and making out, probably taking advantage of the fact that Elisa was absent for a bit, walking the cat outside. Gambit's presence with her would also slow her down a bit too. Jean was there too, having fun with some Italian magazines that she obviously couldn't read, but seemed entertaining nonetheless.
As she reached the kitchen, the entire good mood she had achieved from beating Bobby had gone for a walk. She could smell something intense...and obviously burnt.
"Fuck! The pizza!"
No matter how much she yelled, the poor pizza couldn't be useful to anyone anymore...unless someone needed a big piece of coal, that is.
"Nooo! Elisa will kill me!"
As Logan and Jean barged in, ready for a fight, Rogue was already close to tears. She had been given enough lecturing while preparing the pizza, and if Elisa found out what happened to it, she was going to lecture her to death!
She cocked her head in desperation to them, silently pleading for help...
"I'm gonna kick Bobby's ass for disorienting you from your primary goal; making the pizza!" Logan's gruff voice showed that he meant the threat.
"His ass is too sore right now; more kicking won't him do any good." Rogue said, gesturing like she was getting some dust off her hands.
"But there must be something that we can do", Jean said in her all-the-more-concerned tone.
"I think I might have an idea..." Logan exclaimed, willing to rescue Rogue from agonising death in Elisa's hands...or verbal chords, to be more accurate. "Jean can do it..."
"What can *I* do? There are no more ingredients to make another pizza, and we have no time for that anyway!"
"Use your powers... can't you brainwash the closest pizza-delivery guy to bring to *us* his goodies instead?"
"Excellent idea! Let me see..." Jean said, putting both of her palms at each side of her head...
***************************************************************
Dane was very happy with his life. Out of any responsibility's reach, carefree and with a girlfriend, there was nothing more that he could need in his young life.
His job as a pizza-delivery guy in a place called "Frankie's" was keeping him content too. Not the best salary, but he enjoyed racing against time every time he had to deliver his priceless package to a client...
Like he was doing now.
He could feel the air stroking his hair as he followed the usual journey to Helena's place. The woman had 5 always hungry children who usually preferred Frankie's pizza to the shish-kebab or the Greek souvlaki from the places nearby.
He had gotten used to the road there and could go faster each time he had to deliver to them again.
But this time, as he kept going his usual way he suddenly remembered that Helena had changed residence. She now lived somewhere along Greymalkin Lane, in a really big house that could be a real home for all of her children.
"I'm such a doofus, for forgetting this", he said, slapping his forehead in the process.
***************************************************************
VERY SOON...
"Here you go"
"Thanks"
Rogue smiled at the cute pizza guy as he handed her over the pizzas, obviously thinking she was some Helena gal who was a constant client.
"Maybe Ah should tell Jean to brainwash him into thinking Ah'm Monica Bellucci...then we could have some fun tonight!" Rogue thought impishly, but the reasonable side of her personality instantly rejected the idea. Having the pizza-guy here for 5 minutes was dangerous enough, so keeping him for the night could prove a catastrophe!
"Let me get the money" she told him as she got back into the kitchen, looking around for anybody's wallet. They couldn't brainwash him into believing he got paid too, now could they? But noooo, that was unethical, while stealing the food away from an innocent family was totally within their ethics.
As Rogue was still inside the kitchen, Logan and Jean were standing by the main door, eyeing the unsuspecting pizza guy who was currently brainwashed into believing they were 2 of Helena's kids.
"How you doin' Ronnie?" the pizza guy said, playfully stroking Logan's hair. Logan barely managed not to burst into laughs, but Jean couldn't.
She started laughing, pointing at Dane (the guy's name), and eventually exclaimed within chuckles: "You're funny, mister"
The guy just chuckled as well, probably finding her adorable or something, but then he was bewildered by the "kids" looks of horrification on their chubby faces. The kids were looking at something approaching behind him, and they had gone pale by the time he cocked his head toward where they were looking too.
He saw a tall man in a brown trench coat with his red eyes glistening in the dark. But it wasn't the man's eyes that creeped him out, after all he was used to the mutant sightings in this area. The really scary deal was the short old woman beside him in the one piece back outfit. She looked malevolent and purely evil, without having red eyes.
The woman had a cat in her arms that seemed to be sleeping. But as soon as they got a bit closer, the cat suddenly cocked her head up and looked at him through piercing catlike eyes.
Was the cat evil too?
The evil thing jumped off the old woman's arms, bolting toward him. Dane looked again behind him, where the kids were supposed to be, and saw them looking totally terrified.
He cocked his head where the cat was supposed to be coming again, but the damned thing had pounced on the backside of his neck by then.
Between his own screams of pain and (mostly) surprise, he could hear the evil woman's voice:
"A-HA! Cornutino found himself a nasty nasty mutant! Go boy! get him!"
"But, mom..." the male one of the two kiddies tried to console her.
"No! You saw how he saw through his pretences! My baby tracked him down himself! I told you he can locate their evil hides!"
"But, the man is not a..."
"KILL HIM!!! KILL THE NASTY MUTANT!!!" the old hag assisted her pet by pulling an umbrella out of her bag and hitting poor Dane with it multiple times.
Dane ran for the exit, with a cat on his upper backside and his entire life passing in front of his eyes like a film. The heavy footsteps of the old hag could be heard right behind him, the occasional strike with the umbrella coming on him every few seconds.
***************************************************************
"We kicked the mutie's ass good. Well done my baby." Elisa stroked Cornutino as he rested in her arms again, his peaceful face never implying what a bloodthirsty monster he had been a few seconds ago. The evil mutant had retreated to his motorbike outside and ran off in haste. The Italian hag and her bloodthirsty pet returned from where they had chased him to with the smile of a winner on their faces (actually, it was just Elisa, cats can't smile)
Jean and Logan just looked each other and shrugged.
"What was that filthy mutant doing here, talking the two of you?" She shot inquisitively at Jean and Logan.
They both looked at each other again, no shrugging this time, and then Jean spoke for the two of them:
"Thank God you came Mrs.Maledetto, this freak had tricked us into thinking he was a salesman, but God knows what he intended to really do with us…you saved us!"
"Oh dear Jeannie, how many times do I have to tell you that calling Lord's name in vain is one of the greatest sins?- it's no wonder that you were going to kill yourselves with such an immature behaviour-I am going to pray for your poor souls tonight, dears, because I can't imagine you surviving in this cruel world with the imbecile husband that you got yourself-no need to mention Logan who is, well, Logan-I wish you reconsidered your choice of staying married to Scott, dear, and came with me to Italy.-I'm sure we could find you a decent husband there..."
Oh, well. Until the discussion topic wasn't on the presence of the "mutant" by now.
Rogue finally came at the porch with somebody's wallet, very willing to pay, but she found no pizza guy. Just Logan's mother-in-law, who was lecturing Logan's and Jean's ass off, and Gambit, who was looking at her hands in frustration.
"Hey! What are y' doin' wit' Remy's wallet?"
The moonlight would be gracing the insides of the mansion with its faint, romantic light, of it wasn't for the already turned on lights in there.
The night had finally come, but it seemed to be on its very beginning yet. Logan's mother-in-law had prepared everyone for a night-time feast with Italian goodies and the tender smells coming out of the kitchen were the best available proof for that.
Rogue was the one responsible for the homemade pizza, and she seemed to pose a damn good job up to the time. She was pretty proud of herself too. She also had an apron around her waist, willing to show off how much of a prominent cook and household she was going to be.
In the meanwhile, Jean was getting the spaghetti boiled in order to make an authentic, traditional pasta recipe come true. Herself, she already had some experience with cooking so she didn't need anyone to order her around.
Elisa wasn't in the kitchen at the time. She had gone upstairs, freed Cornutino from his cage and taken him for a walk at the garden. Gambit had gone with her as well, in order to control the mentally unstable cat with more ease. Like a leash wouldn't have been enough.
At that time, the phone rang.
Thus, Rogue found a great opportunity to abandon the cooking for a bit, so she hastily walked towards it and answered with a sweet voice:
"Helloooo?"
"Hello Marie..." a spooky electronically-altered voice came from the other side of the line...
"Who's there?" she asked, her voice staggering between irritation and worry...
"Guessssssss..."
"Who IS it?" she said, this time only irritation colouring the sounds coming through her mouth.
"What's your favourite porn movie?"
"Ehmm... Ah don't watch that kind of stuff. Who are you anyway?"
"Someone who KNOWS." whoever it was, he was now trying to sound more eerie.
"What...what...? What do ya WANT from me?" the mysterious man on the phone seemed to have managed to break her defences...
However Rogue hadn't lost her control as she seemed to have...Secretly, she had called out for Jean to link her telepathically with Logan.
[Logan, would ya do me a favour...? Could ya track Bobby an' tell me where he is...?]
[Wasn't he supposed to be sleeping?]
[Yeah, but probably not anymore...call it a hunch. Now would ya?]
[Sure. Gimme one minute.]
"I want you to confess to Logan how you sneak away every single one of the tapes of his porn stash and watch them in your own luxury. Sneaky pervert."
"When Ah find, you, Ah'll kill you with mah own-ungloved-hands, be sure of that!"
"Wrong answer. Now 'she' gets it."
"Hey, wait! Who is 'she-" Rogue's question was interrupted by the sound of something getting ripped. Probably the magnetic tape of a video. Oh no!
"Let's see how you will now explain this to Logan when he finds his favourite film 'Madripoor nymphos' in this condition."
Holy shit! that was Rogue's favourite film too! it featured some splendid Asian studs with...oh, well, not the right time for such description. Thankfully, at that moment Logan came back and slipped her a piece of paper with the words 'in your room's closet' written on it.
"Here, talk to Logan and explain to him yourself...mystery man." she said to the speaker, then handed it to Logan and bolted upstairs with a vengeance.
"Hello...?" Logan said inquiringly to the man on the other side of the line.
"Hello Logan... where is our little perverted white-streaked girl?"
"Oh, never mind about that...soon, other stuff will be on your mind..."
"What do you mean?" the altered voice now sounded concerned.
Then a noise of intense footsteps started making itself clear from the background of the mysterious voice's side of the line.
Logan only had to add his bottom line to the desperate sounding man on the phone :
"OOOOOH Your gonna ge---t it!"
An "Uh-Oh!" was heard through the line and then a closet door swinging open, and the voice of a frustrated Rogue yelling: "DRAKE!!!"
Logan was happy that he only had acoustic connection to the whole scene, because actually watching what happened would give him nightmares worse than the Weapon X-related ones.
He hung up the phone a lot before Bobby's screams were finished.
***************************************************************
MINUTES LATER
Rogue came down the stairs, feeling A LOT better, almost refreshed.
After all, kicking ass was always refreshing. The fact that it had been a duct tape that had been ripped and not 'Madripoor Nymphos' also helped a bit.
She walked past the rec room, where Logan and Gina were lounging on the couch and making out, probably taking advantage of the fact that Elisa was absent for a bit, walking the cat outside. Gambit's presence with her would also slow her down a bit too. Jean was there too, having fun with some Italian magazines that she obviously couldn't read, but seemed entertaining nonetheless.
As she reached the kitchen, the entire good mood she had achieved from beating Bobby had gone for a walk. She could smell something intense...and obviously burnt.
"Fuck! The pizza!"
No matter how much she yelled, the poor pizza couldn't be useful to anyone anymore...unless someone needed a big piece of coal, that is.
"Nooo! Elisa will kill me!"
As Logan and Jean barged in, ready for a fight, Rogue was already close to tears. She had been given enough lecturing while preparing the pizza, and if Elisa found out what happened to it, she was going to lecture her to death!
She cocked her head in desperation to them, silently pleading for help...
"I'm gonna kick Bobby's ass for disorienting you from your primary goal; making the pizza!" Logan's gruff voice showed that he meant the threat.
"His ass is too sore right now; more kicking won't him do any good." Rogue said, gesturing like she was getting some dust off her hands.
"But there must be something that we can do", Jean said in her all-the-more-concerned tone.
"I think I might have an idea..." Logan exclaimed, willing to rescue Rogue from agonising death in Elisa's hands...or verbal chords, to be more accurate. "Jean can do it..."
"What can *I* do? There are no more ingredients to make another pizza, and we have no time for that anyway!"
"Use your powers... can't you brainwash the closest pizza-delivery guy to bring to *us* his goodies instead?"
"Excellent idea! Let me see..." Jean said, putting both of her palms at each side of her head...
***************************************************************
Dane was very happy with his life. Out of any responsibility's reach, carefree and with a girlfriend, there was nothing more that he could need in his young life.
His job as a pizza-delivery guy in a place called "Frankie's" was keeping him content too. Not the best salary, but he enjoyed racing against time every time he had to deliver his priceless package to a client...
Like he was doing now.
He could feel the air stroking his hair as he followed the usual journey to Helena's place. The woman had 5 always hungry children who usually preferred Frankie's pizza to the shish-kebab or the Greek souvlaki from the places nearby.
He had gotten used to the road there and could go faster each time he had to deliver to them again.
But this time, as he kept going his usual way he suddenly remembered that Helena had changed residence. She now lived somewhere along Greymalkin Lane, in a really big house that could be a real home for all of her children.
"I'm such a doofus, for forgetting this", he said, slapping his forehead in the process.
***************************************************************
VERY SOON...
"Here you go"
"Thanks"
Rogue smiled at the cute pizza guy as he handed her over the pizzas, obviously thinking she was some Helena gal who was a constant client.
"Maybe Ah should tell Jean to brainwash him into thinking Ah'm Monica Bellucci...then we could have some fun tonight!" Rogue thought impishly, but the reasonable side of her personality instantly rejected the idea. Having the pizza-guy here for 5 minutes was dangerous enough, so keeping him for the night could prove a catastrophe!
"Let me get the money" she told him as she got back into the kitchen, looking around for anybody's wallet. They couldn't brainwash him into believing he got paid too, now could they? But noooo, that was unethical, while stealing the food away from an innocent family was totally within their ethics.
As Rogue was still inside the kitchen, Logan and Jean were standing by the main door, eyeing the unsuspecting pizza guy who was currently brainwashed into believing they were 2 of Helena's kids.
"How you doin' Ronnie?" the pizza guy said, playfully stroking Logan's hair. Logan barely managed not to burst into laughs, but Jean couldn't.
She started laughing, pointing at Dane (the guy's name), and eventually exclaimed within chuckles: "You're funny, mister"
The guy just chuckled as well, probably finding her adorable or something, but then he was bewildered by the "kids" looks of horrification on their chubby faces. The kids were looking at something approaching behind him, and they had gone pale by the time he cocked his head toward where they were looking too.
He saw a tall man in a brown trench coat with his red eyes glistening in the dark. But it wasn't the man's eyes that creeped him out, after all he was used to the mutant sightings in this area. The really scary deal was the short old woman beside him in the one piece back outfit. She looked malevolent and purely evil, without having red eyes.
The woman had a cat in her arms that seemed to be sleeping. But as soon as they got a bit closer, the cat suddenly cocked her head up and looked at him through piercing catlike eyes.
Was the cat evil too?
The evil thing jumped off the old woman's arms, bolting toward him. Dane looked again behind him, where the kids were supposed to be, and saw them looking totally terrified.
He cocked his head where the cat was supposed to be coming again, but the damned thing had pounced on the backside of his neck by then.
Between his own screams of pain and (mostly) surprise, he could hear the evil woman's voice:
"A-HA! Cornutino found himself a nasty nasty mutant! Go boy! get him!"
"But, mom..." the male one of the two kiddies tried to console her.
"No! You saw how he saw through his pretences! My baby tracked him down himself! I told you he can locate their evil hides!"
"But, the man is not a..."
"KILL HIM!!! KILL THE NASTY MUTANT!!!" the old hag assisted her pet by pulling an umbrella out of her bag and hitting poor Dane with it multiple times.
Dane ran for the exit, with a cat on his upper backside and his entire life passing in front of his eyes like a film. The heavy footsteps of the old hag could be heard right behind him, the occasional strike with the umbrella coming on him every few seconds.
***************************************************************
"We kicked the mutie's ass good. Well done my baby." Elisa stroked Cornutino as he rested in her arms again, his peaceful face never implying what a bloodthirsty monster he had been a few seconds ago. The evil mutant had retreated to his motorbike outside and ran off in haste. The Italian hag and her bloodthirsty pet returned from where they had chased him to with the smile of a winner on their faces (actually, it was just Elisa, cats can't smile)
Jean and Logan just looked each other and shrugged.
"What was that filthy mutant doing here, talking the two of you?" She shot inquisitively at Jean and Logan.
They both looked at each other again, no shrugging this time, and then Jean spoke for the two of them:
"Thank God you came Mrs.Maledetto, this freak had tricked us into thinking he was a salesman, but God knows what he intended to really do with us…you saved us!"
"Oh dear Jeannie, how many times do I have to tell you that calling Lord's name in vain is one of the greatest sins?- it's no wonder that you were going to kill yourselves with such an immature behaviour-I am going to pray for your poor souls tonight, dears, because I can't imagine you surviving in this cruel world with the imbecile husband that you got yourself-no need to mention Logan who is, well, Logan-I wish you reconsidered your choice of staying married to Scott, dear, and came with me to Italy.-I'm sure we could find you a decent husband there..."
Oh, well. Until the discussion topic wasn't on the presence of the "mutant" by now.
Rogue finally came at the porch with somebody's wallet, very willing to pay, but she found no pizza guy. Just Logan's mother-in-law, who was lecturing Logan's and Jean's ass off, and Gambit, who was looking at her hands in frustration.
"Hey! What are y' doin' wit' Remy's wallet?"