Escape by DreamerMatrix
Disclaimer: The Matrix trilogy does not belong to me. I wish it did, but it doesn't. It is the property of the Wachowski brothers, Andy and Larry, who shouldn't bother suing me because the amount they gained wouldn't cover the lawyer's fees.
A/N: The following script takes place after Matrix, but before Reloaded. I dunno if it's much cop, but heck, I try. If you don't like spoilers, stop reading NOW.
A/N 2: This is turning into random Matrix parodies. But I'll try keep it tied in. Just don't hold me to it.
~*~*~*~*~*~
Screen goes snowy, then blacks out. In green text the words 'TO BE CONTINUED IN ANOTHER FIC' appear...
COMMANDER LOCKE: (VO) Hey, what about the wake?
EVERYONE ELSE: (Group VO) Where the hell did you come from?
MORPHEUS: (VO, sotto voce) girl-stealing dickhead
LOCKE: (VO) How can you have a sotto voce voice over?
SCREEN FADES back to picture, just in time for the audience to see the AUTHOR hit LOCKE upside the head.
LOCKE: Meep!
AUTHOR: Errmmm... Hi...
AUTHOR runs off. NEO giggles.
NEO: (giggling) hehe, the Author's camera shy
A passing sentinel knocks NEO flying with one of it's tentacle things.
TRINITY: The Author is also all-powerful.
NEO: I thought *I* was all powerful.
MORPHEUS: Not until Revolutions, oh purpose of my life.
NEO: Dude, you need to get a hobby.
KID: PAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAR-TAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!
ZEE: It's a wake, fool.
KID: What's the difference?
CUT to
Zion hall EST shot. Who knows what the hell time of day it is?
The hall is empty, until KID comes in screaming at the top of his voice. Then it fills up instantaneously.
KID: PAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAR-TAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!
NEO: Kid, shut up.
TRINITY: We need to name the Kid. Kid is just annoying
NEO jumps up on the speech rock thing, dragging KID with him.
NEO: Quiet please. A moment's silence for the dead, then we're gonna christen Kid.
TRINITY jumps up beside NEO. Everything is silent for a whole minute plus injury time. TRINITY eventually breaks the silence.
TRINITY: Kid, in these hallowed halls, we deign to rechristen you... GEORGE!
EVERYONE ELSE: GEORGE?!
TRINITY: After George Orwell.
EVERYONE ELSE looks blank
TRINITY: The guy who wrote 1984.
EVERYONE ELSE still looks blank
TRINITY: Room 101 guy
NEO: Erm, Trin, Room 101 guy was Paul Merton.
TRINITY: Goddammit, load of illiterates. George Orwell is the name, or pen name or whatever, of the person who wrote a book called 1984, in the true 1948. In this book is the original room 101, where people were sent to be made to believe in stuff that isn't true. Gottit?!
EVERYONE but NEO nods.
NEO: I don't get it. What has this got to do with the Matrix?
MORPHEUS: Well, when you were still plugged into the Matrix your apartment number was 101...
TRINITY: And you were believing stuff which, in reality, was not true.
NEO: OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. Right. I got it.
SPOON KID: There is no spoon. But the Oracle was right when she said you were none too bright.
TRINITY: Where the hell did you come from?
SPOON KID: Don't ask me. I just work here. Ask Morpheus. He's the know-it-all.
CUT TO
Steamy sex scene featuring MORPHEUS and NIOBE. NIOBE looks into the camera.
NIOBE: Hey, do you mind? Trying to have an affair here!
CAMERAMAN: Oh... Sorry..
CUT BACK TO
Zion Hall. Shocked looks on faces of crowd.
NEO: Ewwww, I did *not* need that image.
SPOON KID: There is no image
TRINITY is fuming.
TRINITY: I thought *we* were supposed to get the first steamy sex scene!
AUTHOR: (VO) Yeah, but I wanted to see Locke's face
SPOON KID: There is no-
AUTHOR: Don't push it, Spoon Kid!
SPOON KID runs and hides behind NEO
NEO: Don't bring me into this!
---------------------------------------------------
Jees, do you *really* want more of this? I'm not gonna put a TBC in. This fic may or may not be continued.
I really want to thank the person whose writing introduced me to the word 'meep', I believe it was Angel-of-Light. That word rocks.
Disclaimer: The Matrix trilogy does not belong to me. I wish it did, but it doesn't. It is the property of the Wachowski brothers, Andy and Larry, who shouldn't bother suing me because the amount they gained wouldn't cover the lawyer's fees.
A/N: The following script takes place after Matrix, but before Reloaded. I dunno if it's much cop, but heck, I try. If you don't like spoilers, stop reading NOW.
A/N 2: This is turning into random Matrix parodies. But I'll try keep it tied in. Just don't hold me to it.
~*~*~*~*~*~
Screen goes snowy, then blacks out. In green text the words 'TO BE CONTINUED IN ANOTHER FIC' appear...
COMMANDER LOCKE: (VO) Hey, what about the wake?
EVERYONE ELSE: (Group VO) Where the hell did you come from?
MORPHEUS: (VO, sotto voce) girl-stealing dickhead
LOCKE: (VO) How can you have a sotto voce voice over?
SCREEN FADES back to picture, just in time for the audience to see the AUTHOR hit LOCKE upside the head.
LOCKE: Meep!
AUTHOR: Errmmm... Hi...
AUTHOR runs off. NEO giggles.
NEO: (giggling) hehe, the Author's camera shy
A passing sentinel knocks NEO flying with one of it's tentacle things.
TRINITY: The Author is also all-powerful.
NEO: I thought *I* was all powerful.
MORPHEUS: Not until Revolutions, oh purpose of my life.
NEO: Dude, you need to get a hobby.
KID: PAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAR-TAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!
ZEE: It's a wake, fool.
KID: What's the difference?
CUT to
Zion hall EST shot. Who knows what the hell time of day it is?
The hall is empty, until KID comes in screaming at the top of his voice. Then it fills up instantaneously.
KID: PAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAR-TAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!
NEO: Kid, shut up.
TRINITY: We need to name the Kid. Kid is just annoying
NEO jumps up on the speech rock thing, dragging KID with him.
NEO: Quiet please. A moment's silence for the dead, then we're gonna christen Kid.
TRINITY jumps up beside NEO. Everything is silent for a whole minute plus injury time. TRINITY eventually breaks the silence.
TRINITY: Kid, in these hallowed halls, we deign to rechristen you... GEORGE!
EVERYONE ELSE: GEORGE?!
TRINITY: After George Orwell.
EVERYONE ELSE looks blank
TRINITY: The guy who wrote 1984.
EVERYONE ELSE still looks blank
TRINITY: Room 101 guy
NEO: Erm, Trin, Room 101 guy was Paul Merton.
TRINITY: Goddammit, load of illiterates. George Orwell is the name, or pen name or whatever, of the person who wrote a book called 1984, in the true 1948. In this book is the original room 101, where people were sent to be made to believe in stuff that isn't true. Gottit?!
EVERYONE but NEO nods.
NEO: I don't get it. What has this got to do with the Matrix?
MORPHEUS: Well, when you were still plugged into the Matrix your apartment number was 101...
TRINITY: And you were believing stuff which, in reality, was not true.
NEO: OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. Right. I got it.
SPOON KID: There is no spoon. But the Oracle was right when she said you were none too bright.
TRINITY: Where the hell did you come from?
SPOON KID: Don't ask me. I just work here. Ask Morpheus. He's the know-it-all.
CUT TO
Steamy sex scene featuring MORPHEUS and NIOBE. NIOBE looks into the camera.
NIOBE: Hey, do you mind? Trying to have an affair here!
CAMERAMAN: Oh... Sorry..
CUT BACK TO
Zion Hall. Shocked looks on faces of crowd.
NEO: Ewwww, I did *not* need that image.
SPOON KID: There is no image
TRINITY is fuming.
TRINITY: I thought *we* were supposed to get the first steamy sex scene!
AUTHOR: (VO) Yeah, but I wanted to see Locke's face
SPOON KID: There is no-
AUTHOR: Don't push it, Spoon Kid!
SPOON KID runs and hides behind NEO
NEO: Don't bring me into this!
---------------------------------------------------
Jees, do you *really* want more of this? I'm not gonna put a TBC in. This fic may or may not be continued.
I really want to thank the person whose writing introduced me to the word 'meep', I believe it was Angel-of-Light. That word rocks.