A/N : This chapter deals with Snape, with some back-at-Hogwarts scenes. The next chapter will be Hermione/Ron.

Disclaimer: Must I remind myself continuously that I don't own anything? It's all very depressing for me… Ok – Harry potter stuff here, all J.K. Rowling's and her peoples. Lord of the Rings stuff? All J.R.R Tolkien's and his peoples. I don't own anything here and I don't get any money from this and…why do I even bother? Lol.

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BOOK: THE SECOND – BEING THAT OF THE CONTINUING TALE OF THE (NOW BROKEN UP) FELLOWSHIPPERS OF THE RING AND A COUPLE OF TOWERS.

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Darkness was what he needed. Darkness was what he craved for. Darkness was all he wanted. Well, that and to reclaim his fame. Anyway, darkness was all he could think of… So what better place to retreat to in search of darkness than Snape's dungeon? Perfectly logical in Harry's mind.

Harry looked…awful. He hadn't washed in over a week. He had spoken to no one. Except himself, of course (for he could find no sane conversation anywhere else.)

This is where it all started, Harry thought, this is where my life was ruined by my two best friends. Harry pulled out The Book, which he had stolen from the Great Hall earlier that day. From its golden stand at the front of the hall where my picture used to sit, Harry added to himself bitterly. Harry began hitting his head with The Book and repeating the only phrase he'd been saying out loud all week over and over and over…

"Got to be famous again, got to be famous again, got to be famous again…"

From behind he heard a slight coughing. Harry ignored it.

"So… You want to be famous?"

The voice was so oily it was slipping through the speaker's throat. Harry rolled his eyes at those words,

"I am famous."

"You *were* famous."

"I am famous."

"No, you *were* famous. And anyway, if you *are* famous, then you wouldn't be saying 'Got to *be* famous again' like some sort of mantra. Comprehend?"

Harry's eyes narrowed. He still hadn't turned around to face the person he was talking to, but he already hated them. With a large amount of hate. Not as much as he hated his best friends, but it was still a pretty hefty amount of hate. Irritated, Harry said,

"I survived the killing curse and caused the downfall of Voldemort!"

"Oh, come on Harry! That is sooo 1980's! Get with the times my boy, you've got to better yourself to stay in the limelight!"

Harry turned round with a twitching eye to face the speaker. He looked… exactly as Harry had always imagined the Devil would look in human form.

"Oh my God! You're Satan!"

Harry screamed and pointed. The speaker sighed angrily.

"No. I am *not* Satan. But thank you for referring to me as your god. For that is what I am." The speaker smirked, in a very Snapeish way, "I am the God of Irrepressible Vengeful Thoughts and Insanity."

Harry stared at the god. The god stared at Harry. There was silence. The god broke the silence, shouting,

"For goodness sake! I'm here to give you revenge!"

Harry's eyes lit up.

"Revenge…?"

"That's what I said. Name it and I shall do it."

"You mean… get back at Hermione and Ron and Snape for stealing my glory?"

"Yes."

The god smiled cruelly.

**

Numerous orcs surrounded Snape, Merry and Pippin. Snape could feel his feet burning and growing heavier with each step. Jeez, for heavy looking buggers they certainly move with speed, thought Snape. Suddenly, he heard a large CRACK and felt a searing pain across his back.

"I hope you know that…" Snape started, and he was whipped again. Snape bit his lip, then continued, "That this is *extremely* degrading!"

Nameless Orc number one whipped Snape across the back of his calves, and shouted,

"Shuddup you slimy git and MOVE IT! Talkin' just gets me MAD!"

Snape rolled his eyes and tried to continue walking, despite the obvious pain running up and down his whole body.

"I'm surprised your vocal chords have evolved far enough to let you make any intelligible sounds…" muttered Snape under his breath.

Snape felt something pulling at his robes, but was unable to distinguish what it was due to the aches and discomforts running in waves throughout him. From behind him, he could hear a loud, guff voice exclaim,

"Oi! Boys! Look at this! That greasy scumbag of a man was carrying it!"

Snape's eyes widened in horror and he desperately tried to turn to see what it was Nameless Orc number two had taken from his robes, already fearing what it was. From beside him, Snape heard Pippin squeal,

"Ooooo! Sevvie! Look what Nameless Orc number two has!"

Snape frantically tried to turn to shout at Pippin, but was kicked in the stomach by a nearby orc who just laughed as Snape doubled over due to being winded. Oh no, please Lord, Snape thought, I've never asked much of you, in fact I've never asked anything of you, but please, don't let that dratted hobbit say anything. For once let the damn thing keep his MOUTH SHUT!

God obviously wasn't listening to Snape. For Pippin continued,

"Sevvie! Did you hear me? Nameless Orc number two has your WAND!"

Pippin screamed as he was whipped. Snape nearly fell over in a depressive pile of uselessness. Nameless Orc number two grabbed Snape roughly by the shoulder, nearly dislocating it and yelled,

"Wand? WAND? You a wizard grease-bucket?!"

Snape opened his mouth to say 'Why yes, actually, whatever gave you that idea?' but thought the better of it as he was thumped in the back by Nameless Orc number two as the oaf shouted,

"…'Cos we're not too fond of wizards 'ere, are we lads?"

All the orcs screamed 'NOOOOO!' in unison, in harsh and nasty voices. Sh*t, thought Snape, this is turning out to be just a perfect day for me, isn't it. Snape refrained from answering the orc's question about wizards, even though the orc asked him the question a second time. I mean, what was Snape supposed to do? He wasn't planning on arguing with over 30 orcs who were whipping his back raw without possession of his wand!

"Wizards live up their own bums!" screamed Nameless Orc number three. Choruses of 'Yeah! You tell 'im!' rang out from the throng of orcs. Snape grimaced; I'm stuck with a large group of wizard-hating, vicious buffoons. I need my wand. Now.

"Umm…" Snape caught the eye of Nameless Orc number two, "…May I have my…ehh…*stick* back?"

The orc grinned, if that was what it was – Snape was rather unsure, then used Snape's wand to scratch himself in the trouser area. Snape half gagged then muttered,

"Uh…Nevermind…"

Pippin had made his way over to near Snape. Snape glared the best he could at the hobbit, whose loud response was,

"But Sevvie! You can't let them have that! That's your wa…!"

Snape suddenly lunged for Pippin and tackled him to the ground. As the orcs went into uproar and a frenzied rush to pull the two prisoners apart, Snape just had enough time to hiss violently in Pippin's ear,

"For once in your sorry existence JUST DON'T TALK!"

 Snape was dragged away from Pippin and beaten. Pippin was picked up off the ground and slung over Nameless Orc number one's shoulder looking upset and saying,

"…but…but…Sevvie…"

**

A/N: Shall have what's going on with Hermione and Ron written + posted in a couple of days.

Thanks to:

DragonLady - He loses his heart to………*mumbles* you'll find out in later chapters ^_^

Anonymous Reviewer – I did re-read fast! Ok………well I listened to the BBC LOTR radio play………*is lazy-ass*

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Zardiphillian Beryllix - ^_^ Thanks for still reviewing!!!

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Gabriele – Thank you! I'm glad you liked the story ^_^

Digitaru – Mwahahahahaaaaa torture the Slytherins again? It's a possibility……… *Snape shouts angrily at the Author who whistles innocently*

Nicolette – I'm glad you enjoy it!!! Whoohoo! I enjoy writing it!

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Please review! *begs desperately*