Disclaimer:
I don't own Ranma and I don't own my friends either.
Isn't that sad?
"Survive with only Your Clothes and Your Charm" by dacop
Chapter 8: The evil entity, Rovert!
The real ???: Ha ha. I will kill yooouuuu.
The real Me: Oh shit!!! It's... it's!!!!
The real ???: Yo missed!!! Ha!!! Dat was fakie blud!!
The real Bobby: Do you really want me to shoot your head off, yo?
The real Besa: Yo! Yo! Yo! YOO!!!
The real Bobby: Too late... *pulls trigger*
The real Besa: SHIIIIITTTT!!!! HUH? Yo!! Dat was just wawa!!!
The real Bobby: Water. Say WAAATTEEERRR.
The real Besa: Wa.....wa. Wa.....tusi. Wa.........sup?
The real Bobby: Say "you" not "yo"
The real Besa: Yo......oooooo
The real Bobby: Fine, be that way. *points M-16 at Besa's head*
The real Besa: Imma nut gonna buy thet one... one mah time. PEACE!!!
The real Bobby: You don't believe me? *Shoots TV*
*BZZZZZZT*
The real Me: Oh crap. You did it now, Bobby. THAT COSTED 5 PESOS IN THE GARAGE SALE!! DO YOU FUCKING KNOW HOW FUCKING MUCH IS 5 FUCKING PESOS??????
The real Bobby: Who cares about your TV? You're about to get a bullet on your head. *points luger at Trevor's head*
The real Me: I bet that has wawa I mean water in it.
The real Bobby: Say that again and bye-bye paste.
The real Me: I FUCKING BET THAT FUCKING HAS FUCKING WATER IN IT!!!
The real Bobby: You asked for it. *Takes out MG42, mounts it on table, starts firing anything he sees*
*everything breaks except for the computer and the camera*
The real Bobby: Oops. I forgot something. *shoots computer*
The real Me: BOBBYYYY!! I'M SO GONNA KICK YOUR ASS!
The real Thomas: Yeah!! How are we supposed to tell the story now?
The real Bobby: We can just tell it right here, right now, asshole.
The real Besa: Ok! I'll be da funkeh narrataw.
One deh, I took ovah da wurld!! Den eburibodi baod down too mee! And I sent dees guys to da place wer da devil lives and is full of fiare.
The real EA: Forget it Besa. The storyteller must be one of us THREE!
The real Me: Then it's me! Ok! Back to the story!
The real EA: Wait!
Well, when we last left the gang, they died. Or so we think.
Miyu: *sniff* Why did they have to die?
Ranma: Hey, Tofu I need- WHAT THE HELL???
Tofu: I'm sorry Ranma. We lost them.
Ranma: No way!
Tofu: There was nothing we could do. We couldn't change history.
Ranma: Well, at least that's 5 freeloaders less.
Miyu: DON'T SAY THAT!! *sniff*
Ranma: Wow. You cared about them that much?
Miyu: They were my friends! They were all our friends!
Ranma: Hey, they're my friends too, you know.
Miyu: Well, WHAT DID YOU DO TO HELP??
Ranma: ....
Miyu: You ran away!!!
Ranma: But-
Miyu: I'm sorry. If only I just put one firecracker.
*Thomas' hand moved*
Miyu: Chii? ARRGHH!! I MEAN... huh?
*Thomas' hand wrapped around Miyu's throat*
Miyu: ACKKK!!! GET IT OFF!!!
Thomas: RELP ME!!!
Tofu: Goodness!! He's alive!!
Thomas: *spits a long object out* AAHH!! I FINALLY GOT IT OUT!!!
Tofu: A chicken bone? *sniffs* It's from KFC!!!
Thomas: That bone almost impaled my esophagus!!!
Tofu: Wait! Let me read that book!!!
Tofu: Let me see... If the ritual is successful, a chicken bone will get stuck in their throat causing them to faint. Do not panic. Just take the bone out and they will be just fine.
Thomas: Wow. That was dumb.
Tofu: What a joke.
Ranma: Yeah.
Tofu: I mean, that is just plain stupid!!!
Miyu: Hee hee! You said it!!
Thomas: What do you mean stupid??? It could've been worse!!!
Ranma: Yeah right. I mean, a chicken bone?? How did a CHICKEN BONE get there so fast? HA HA HA!!!
Thomas: Very funny, Ranma. Very funny.
Ranma: I mean, really.
Thomas: I agree.
Miyu: Chii! I mean, yeah!
Thomas: So, what do we do?
*silence*
Tofu: GET THE BONES OUT!!
(LATER...)
Me: Ow. My throat!
Miyu: CHII-IIII!!!
Bobby: Huh?
Miyu: Oops. Hee hee!
Tofu: I'm glad you are safe, guys.
Miyu: Ch- AAAAARRGHH!!! I'll just keep quiet. Hee hee!!
Tofu: Well, lets look at the book again.
EA: Yeah. Maybe we get more powers! Heh.
Besa: Wait for me.
*the gang and tofu read the book*
Everyone: O_O
Bobby: Did you just see what I just saw?
Besa: Yep no doubt about it.
EA: Hey, Trevor! Better keep away from us for a few days, okay?
Me: WHAT???
Miyu: Chii?? ARRRGGGHHH!! I WATCH TOO MUCH CHOBITS!!
Thomas: Yeah?
Miyu: Oh, I mean... what did it say?
Tofu: It says, watch out. You have made a big mistake letting them exist this long. If angry, a dark being will come out of the leader or the one who has the "defense" technique. He will overpower and kill anyone he sees, including the charmed ones. Good luck and, nyah nyah nyah!!!
Miyu: AAHHHH!!! GET AWAY FROM ME, TREVOR!!!!
Me: WAIT!! You misunderstand.
Miyu: AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!! *slaps me*
*Miyu runs away*
Me: MIYU!!! .....damn.
Thomas: Don't worry pal. MAKE SURE HE GETS YOU FIRST!!!
EA: Yeah!!
Bobby: Keep away man!!!
The real Me: WAIT!!!! I NEED TO SAY SOMETHING TO EVERYONE OF YOU!!!
The real Thomas: Oh great. What? You interrupted yourself?
The real Me: Cue sad music again!!!
The real EA: Ok guys. Don't interrupt him. He got another review.
*sad music*
The real Me: Ummm... hello "laugher" or whoever you are. Of course, I give acknowledgements to reviewers (except for Bobby and my other friends). All I want to say is... thank you for even READING this story. I mean... really???? IS MY STORY GREAT? Wow. THANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOU!!! It's reviewers like you that give life to us writers. And is this story as funny as that movie you watched (Bruce Almighty or Ace Ventura I think)? Wow! I'm still at cloud 9 right now. And I promise!! I will update at least once a week! I will not do schoolwork for the week until the chapter is finished!! *sniff* ASTIG KA TALAGA, KUNG SINO KA MAN!!! (YOU'RE REALLY COOL! WHOEVER YOU ARE!). Now... Hey!! What are you guys looking at???? AND WOULD YOU PLEASE STOP LAUGHING???!!! BACK TO THE STORY!!!
The real Thomas: Oooohhh. The big man has a sensitive side.
The real Me: Oh, just shut up, bitch. You would have reacted like that if this was YOUR first story.
The real Thomas: Oh well. I don't write fics anyway.
(BACK TO THE STORY)
Besa: WHOA!!! They called you dangerous but this is just camel shit!!
Me: C'mon! Don't just ditch me now. I thought you were my friends. You're making me.... arrgghhhh.... ANGRY!!!!!
Thomas: OH SHIT!!!
Me: NYARRRGHHhHhhHhhHh!!!!! *splits into two Me's*
Besa: You asses!!! LOOK AT WHAT YOU DID!!!!!
EA: Trevor? Are you okay? Ummm... are you the white one or the black one?
Me: Oooohh. Where am I?
???: Pretty soon... in hell.
Me: HOLY SHIT!!! WHO ARE YOU????
Thomas: Hey, who's that black guy?
???: I AM NOT BLACK!!! I AM DARK!!!
Me: You must be my evil twin. You look exactly like me.
???: He he he... *gets paper*
Me: Who are you??
???: This is your name right? *Writes my name*
Me: Yes???
???: Then this is mine. *flips it upside-down*
Me: mmm... hmm...
Thomas: HOLY SHIT!!! I THINK SAW THIS IN A MOVIE!!! WHOAH THAT WAS SO WEIRD!!! CLEVER!!!
Rovert: Shut up, you bitch. *makes energy orb and shoots it at Thomas*
*BOOOMM*
Thomas: Nyarkkkk!!! .........you...bastard.
EA: Thomas!!! Get a hold of yourself!!!! SENSEI!!!
Tofu: Wait! Thomas! Don't move! It will just widen the wound!
Thomas: Oooff...
Me: Why the hell did you do that???
Rovert: Kasi ganoon talaga ako. (Because that's how I am.)
Me: Ang sama mo. (You are so evil.)
Rovert: Oka agatala istor mating bok (???????)
Me: Huh?
Rovert: Sorry. I can't speak that well.
Me: He heh. Spell the word "Bote".
Rovert: B..O...
Me: Use our native alphabet.
Rovert: Ba...ho...ta...e
Me, Thomas, EA, Besa, and Bobby: AAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!
Rovert: What?
Me: Hey, Rovert! Say "I have bote". And spell "bote".
Rovert: I have bahotae.
Me, Thomas, EA, Besa, and Bobby: AAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
Rovert: What did I say?
Me: Allow me to translate that. You said "I have stinky shit".
The whole gang: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!
Rovert: You tricked me.
Me: Gee, Rovert. Don't be so gloomy. It was a joke.
Thomas: Besides... EVERYONE'S SHIT IS STINKY!!!
The whole gang: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
EA: Nice one Thomas!!!
Bobby: Hey! Is there something wrong with Rovert?
Rovert: Summoning from the hellish abyss...
Besa: Hello? Helloooo??? Mr. Evil Guy???
Rovert: Awaken the darkest power... *evil aura*
Rovert: Kill them all...
*BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM M!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!*
Thomas, EA, Besa, Bobby: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!
Thomas: We're 30,000 feet in the air!!! AAAAAAA!!!
EA: Hey! How come Trevor, Ranma, and Tofu are not here?
(AT THE RUINS OF TOFU'S CLINIC)
Ranma: AAG.... That was too... powerful. Even for my passive technique.
Tofu: Oofff.... My... back....
Me: Huh? Did someone take our picture? What happened to the roof? And... DAMN!!! WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU?????
Ranma: Demme.... He attacked us.
Tofu: You did not felt it because of your... Charm.
(BACK IN THE ATMOSPHERE)
Bobby: AND I DON'T KNOW MY POWER YET!!!
Thomas: Well, try it!!!!
Bobby: OK! Nghhhhhhh..... *disappears*
EA: WHOAH!! COOOOOLLL! BIOLOGICAL STEALTH CAMO!!
Bobby: Hey! I'm invisible!!! Coooool!!! *punches Thomas*
Thomas: ARRGHH!!! WHY YOU!!! *punches Thomas downwards*
*WHACK!!!*
EA: Ummm, asshole. YOU JUST SENT BOBBY TO HIS DEATH!!!
Besa: You fiend!!!
Thomas: Ahh... who cares... we're falling anyway.
*silence*
Thomas, EA, and Besa: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!
(At the Tendo household)
Soun: Saotome-kun? What's wrong?
Genma: I sense something vivid.
Akane: Saotome-ojiisama?
Genma: Something's about to fall.
Akane: Ahh. He's just having an off-day. Besides, where's Ranma?
Nabiki: Come to think of it Akane, Trevor and the others haven't come back from the clinic yet.
*!!!!CRASH!!!!*
Kasumi: Oh my...
Soun: SAOTOME-KUN?? WHY DID THE TABLE COLLAPSE???
Akane: AND WHY IS THERE SUDDENLY A HOLE IN THE ROOF?????
Bobby: WHADDYA MEAN, COLLAPSE? I'M RIGHT HERE!!!
Akane: AAAAAHHHHH!!!
Bobby: *turns visible again* You are all sons of bi- WHOAH!!! YOU'RE THE TENDOS!!!
Akane: How did you know???
Bobby: You are very famous anime characters in my world!!!
Soun: Oh... you must be one of Trevor's friends!
Nabiki: Strange... I don't remember you.
Bobby: Oh. I just came in today.
Genma: Uhh.. hey boy!!! You're bleeding.
Bobby: What?? Oh shit. ShitshitshitshitshitshitSHIIIITT!!!
Akane: I'll get the bandages!
*Akane runs to the bathroom but suddenly...*
*!!!CRASH!!!*
*!!!CRASH!!!*
Akane: AAAAAAAAHHHH!!! Huh? EA! Thomas!!
EA: Ooooff.... yo.
The real Besa: YO!! Yo, immatatered meh!!
The real Bobby: Ahh... who cares about you, ass??
The real Besa: YO! Da whole Urth loves meh!! Right?
World: WE HATE YOU, BITCH!!!
The real Besa: See wat I meen, yo?
The real Bobby: Riiiiight....
The real Me: HEY!! PAY ATTENTION!!!!
The real Bobby: Die *pulls trigger of M9*
*click* *click*
The real Me: Looking for this, bitch? *holds out M9 magazine*
The real Bobby: Damn you.
(BACK TO THE STORY)
Thomas: Agghh!! I think I twisted my ankle and... BOBBY! Where the hell is Bobby??
Akane: He's at the dining room. He's bleeding badly.
EA: Hey what about Besa???
*!!!CRASH!!!*
Besa: Ooof!! Thanks for breaking my fall, EA.
EA: Aggg!!! Hey! I never knew the last time you wet the bed was...
Besa: YOU DICK!!! HOW DID YOU KNOW???
EA: My Charm, remember?
Besa: Speaking of dick, I am gonna kick yours. If I didn't have this sprained ankle. Ooof.
Akane: Oh great.
Besa: Man! Why did this happen to us?
EA: HEY! We're lucky anime physics apply to us! If it didn't, we would've been dead the moment the clinic exploded!
Besa: Good point.
EA: Right, Thomas?
Thomas: .....
EA: Oh great. He's unconscious.
(AT THE CLINIC)
Me: Guys!! Go to the Dojo! It's too dangerous here!
Ranma: No! I'll stay here!
Me: NO! You could die here! He's way too powerful!!
Ranma: But...
Tofu: He's right. Lets go.
Rovert: HEY! YOU IGNORED ME HERE! *charges energy*
Me: YAME!!!
Ranma: NO! DON'T!!!
Me: RUN AWAY!
*Tofu and Ranma ran away*
Rovert: NO YOU DON'T!!
*I pounced on Rovert just before he shot the blast*
*BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!*
Rovert: *cough* *cough* WHY DID YOU DO THAT?? AND.... Why aren't you dead?
Me: There are just some things we just don't know... do we?
Rovert: Tama ka diyan. (You're right.)
Me: Humanda ka, demonyo. (Get ready, demon.)
*SHOWDOWN*
Rovert: EAT THIS!!! *blast*
*BOOOOOOOM!!!*
Me: Give it up. Get back in my body!
Rovert: No fair! You have a Charm!!!
Me: That's right. Now, GIVE UP ALREADY, BITCH!!!
Miyu: Ummm... Guys?
Me: Miyu! NOOOOO!!
Miyu: I'm sorry about awhile ago and...
Rovert: Chance!!! *grabs Miyu*
Miyu:AAAHHH!!! What are you doing??
Rovert: Move... and she dies.
Me: You bastard.
Rovert: TAKE THIS *blast*
Me: Just give up. You can't kill me like that.
Rovert: Right. I think I found your weakness.
Me: OH SHIT!!!
Rovert: I know about your power.
Me: Shitshitshitshitshitshit!!!
Rovert: You are weak to direct attacks!! *throws knife*
Me: OH SHIT!! *evades*
Rovert: Ha ha ha.
Me: You dick!!!
Thomas: Hey, you can't win this alone. Can you?
Me: Thomas!!! You're back!!!
EA: Right here, pal.
Me: EA!!
Besa: I'm back.
Me: BESA!!!
Bobby: Wazup?
Me: BOBBY!! Guys! You really came!!!
EA: Yeah!!! We're a team...
Rovert: Wow. I think I'm gonna cry. DIE, BITCHES!!! *several blasts*
EA: Don't move!! It's a bluff!!
Rovert: How did you know?
*KABOOOOOMMM*
Thomas: What the fuck is this? CHEESE POWDER!!!
EA: No.... *reads Rovert's mind* it's actually... uhh... right. It is cheese powder.
Besa: See, black guy? 5 charms to one is win win win for us!! *spark*
Thomas: Go Besa!!!
Besa: Right. HHYAAAAAAAAAA!! *electric blast*
EA: WAIT!! NOT THAT STRONG!!! *gets shocked* Nyayayayayaya!!!!
Thomas: Uhh... EA?
EA: *unconscious*
Besa: YAAAAAAAHHHH!!! *electric blast*
Rovert: ARRGGHHH!!!! *lets go of Miyu*
Miyu: Thanks!!! *slaps Rovert* YOU PERVERT!!!
Me: Quick, Miyu! Come here!
Besa: Now. Time to die. *charges electricity*
Rovert: Oh shit!!! *power shield*
Besa: No fair!!!! *several blasts*
*bzzt* *bzzt* *bzzt* *bzzt*
Rovert: *shield breaks* NOOOOOO!!!!
EA: Ok! *reads Rovert's mind* THOMAS!!! NOW!!!!
Thomas: KANGAROO FIST!!!! *lunges a punch*
Rovert: *gets blown back* NYARRKKKKGHHHH!!!!
Thomas: YES!!!
EA: *reads Rovert's mind* Bobby! Pin him down!!
Bobby: Roger! *disappears*
Rovert: Now... what are you up to?
EA: Heheheheh.
Rovert: OOOFF!!! YOU ARE WEARING METAL SOLES DAMMIT!!!
Bobby: Heh heh.
Rovert: RGHHH... Now the biggest blast of them all *charges*
Me: Get outta there, Bobby!!!!
EA: *reads Rovert's mind* TREVOR!!! DO IT!!!
Me: RIGHT!! *jumps onto Rovert*
Rovert: GRAAAAAA!!! *big damn blast*
*blast bounces off of me and hits him*
*BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!*
Me: It is finished....
*Rovert is in ashes*
EA: Yes!!! We defeated him... or IT!!
Me: Yep. Ooff.. Man. I see spots. That was way too bright.
*SHOWDOWN ENDS*
Bobby: Well, lets go home.
Besa: RIGHT!! I AM HUNGRYYYYYYYY!!!!
Me: Well. I hope there aren't any more Discharms.
The real Me: WHOOOOOOOOOOO!! Chapter end!!
The real Besa: Dat was a grayyyt endin'!!!
The real EA: Nice one!!
The real Thomas: Yeah. But will Rovert come back?
The real Me: Count on it.
The real Bobby: Hey! Eat lead assholes!! *fires M4 everywhere*
*!!!! ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta !!!!*
The real Me: Bobby's blew his stack again!! Thomas!! Show the sneak peek!!
The real Thomas: ROGER!!!
-------------------------------------
Thomas: What are you talking about?
Me: You just made the biggest mistake of your life.
Thomas: Huh?
Ranma: Good luck, and good bye!!!
EA: Yeah. You are DOOMED, man.
Me: Yeah. You were such a dumbass. WHY THE FUCK DID YOU SAY YES???
Ranma: Well, see you at the funeral guys.
Akane: Guys?
Me: AAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!! SHE'S HERE!!!
EA: Quick, Thomas!! SAY YOUR PRAYERS!!!
Me: AAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
Akane: Thomas-kun!!!!
Thomas: SHITTTTT!!!
Akane: *vein pops out of head* You guys better be not talking about THIS!!! *removes cloth*
Thomas: SHIIITTT!!!! NOOOoOooooooOOOOOOoOoO!! Shitshitshitshitshitshitshit!!!!
EA and Me: AAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!!!
--------------------------------------------
EA: End the chapter now!!!!
Bobby: GRRRRAAAA *continues firing*
*!!!! ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta !!!!*
*camera gets hit*
*static*
FFFFFFFSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!
*We are experiencing technical difficulties at the moment. Please stay tuned for the next chapter!*
*OFF THE AIR*
"Survive with only Your Clothes and Your Charm" by dacop
Chapter 8: The evil entity, Rovert!
The real ???: Ha ha. I will kill yooouuuu.
The real Me: Oh shit!!! It's... it's!!!!
The real ???: Yo missed!!! Ha!!! Dat was fakie blud!!
The real Bobby: Do you really want me to shoot your head off, yo?
The real Besa: Yo! Yo! Yo! YOO!!!
The real Bobby: Too late... *pulls trigger*
The real Besa: SHIIIIITTTT!!!! HUH? Yo!! Dat was just wawa!!!
The real Bobby: Water. Say WAAATTEEERRR.
The real Besa: Wa.....wa. Wa.....tusi. Wa.........sup?
The real Bobby: Say "you" not "yo"
The real Besa: Yo......oooooo
The real Bobby: Fine, be that way. *points M-16 at Besa's head*
The real Besa: Imma nut gonna buy thet one... one mah time. PEACE!!!
The real Bobby: You don't believe me? *Shoots TV*
*BZZZZZZT*
The real Me: Oh crap. You did it now, Bobby. THAT COSTED 5 PESOS IN THE GARAGE SALE!! DO YOU FUCKING KNOW HOW FUCKING MUCH IS 5 FUCKING PESOS??????
The real Bobby: Who cares about your TV? You're about to get a bullet on your head. *points luger at Trevor's head*
The real Me: I bet that has wawa I mean water in it.
The real Bobby: Say that again and bye-bye paste.
The real Me: I FUCKING BET THAT FUCKING HAS FUCKING WATER IN IT!!!
The real Bobby: You asked for it. *Takes out MG42, mounts it on table, starts firing anything he sees*
*everything breaks except for the computer and the camera*
The real Bobby: Oops. I forgot something. *shoots computer*
The real Me: BOBBYYYY!! I'M SO GONNA KICK YOUR ASS!
The real Thomas: Yeah!! How are we supposed to tell the story now?
The real Bobby: We can just tell it right here, right now, asshole.
The real Besa: Ok! I'll be da funkeh narrataw.
One deh, I took ovah da wurld!! Den eburibodi baod down too mee! And I sent dees guys to da place wer da devil lives and is full of fiare.
The real EA: Forget it Besa. The storyteller must be one of us THREE!
The real Me: Then it's me! Ok! Back to the story!
The real EA: Wait!
Well, when we last left the gang, they died. Or so we think.
Miyu: *sniff* Why did they have to die?
Ranma: Hey, Tofu I need- WHAT THE HELL???
Tofu: I'm sorry Ranma. We lost them.
Ranma: No way!
Tofu: There was nothing we could do. We couldn't change history.
Ranma: Well, at least that's 5 freeloaders less.
Miyu: DON'T SAY THAT!! *sniff*
Ranma: Wow. You cared about them that much?
Miyu: They were my friends! They were all our friends!
Ranma: Hey, they're my friends too, you know.
Miyu: Well, WHAT DID YOU DO TO HELP??
Ranma: ....
Miyu: You ran away!!!
Ranma: But-
Miyu: I'm sorry. If only I just put one firecracker.
*Thomas' hand moved*
Miyu: Chii? ARRGHH!! I MEAN... huh?
*Thomas' hand wrapped around Miyu's throat*
Miyu: ACKKK!!! GET IT OFF!!!
Thomas: RELP ME!!!
Tofu: Goodness!! He's alive!!
Thomas: *spits a long object out* AAHH!! I FINALLY GOT IT OUT!!!
Tofu: A chicken bone? *sniffs* It's from KFC!!!
Thomas: That bone almost impaled my esophagus!!!
Tofu: Wait! Let me read that book!!!
Tofu: Let me see... If the ritual is successful, a chicken bone will get stuck in their throat causing them to faint. Do not panic. Just take the bone out and they will be just fine.
Thomas: Wow. That was dumb.
Tofu: What a joke.
Ranma: Yeah.
Tofu: I mean, that is just plain stupid!!!
Miyu: Hee hee! You said it!!
Thomas: What do you mean stupid??? It could've been worse!!!
Ranma: Yeah right. I mean, a chicken bone?? How did a CHICKEN BONE get there so fast? HA HA HA!!!
Thomas: Very funny, Ranma. Very funny.
Ranma: I mean, really.
Thomas: I agree.
Miyu: Chii! I mean, yeah!
Thomas: So, what do we do?
*silence*
Tofu: GET THE BONES OUT!!
(LATER...)
Me: Ow. My throat!
Miyu: CHII-IIII!!!
Bobby: Huh?
Miyu: Oops. Hee hee!
Tofu: I'm glad you are safe, guys.
Miyu: Ch- AAAAARRGHH!!! I'll just keep quiet. Hee hee!!
Tofu: Well, lets look at the book again.
EA: Yeah. Maybe we get more powers! Heh.
Besa: Wait for me.
*the gang and tofu read the book*
Everyone: O_O
Bobby: Did you just see what I just saw?
Besa: Yep no doubt about it.
EA: Hey, Trevor! Better keep away from us for a few days, okay?
Me: WHAT???
Miyu: Chii?? ARRRGGGHHH!! I WATCH TOO MUCH CHOBITS!!
Thomas: Yeah?
Miyu: Oh, I mean... what did it say?
Tofu: It says, watch out. You have made a big mistake letting them exist this long. If angry, a dark being will come out of the leader or the one who has the "defense" technique. He will overpower and kill anyone he sees, including the charmed ones. Good luck and, nyah nyah nyah!!!
Miyu: AAHHHH!!! GET AWAY FROM ME, TREVOR!!!!
Me: WAIT!! You misunderstand.
Miyu: AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!! *slaps me*
*Miyu runs away*
Me: MIYU!!! .....damn.
Thomas: Don't worry pal. MAKE SURE HE GETS YOU FIRST!!!
EA: Yeah!!
Bobby: Keep away man!!!
The real Me: WAIT!!!! I NEED TO SAY SOMETHING TO EVERYONE OF YOU!!!
The real Thomas: Oh great. What? You interrupted yourself?
The real Me: Cue sad music again!!!
The real EA: Ok guys. Don't interrupt him. He got another review.
*sad music*
The real Me: Ummm... hello "laugher" or whoever you are. Of course, I give acknowledgements to reviewers (except for Bobby and my other friends). All I want to say is... thank you for even READING this story. I mean... really???? IS MY STORY GREAT? Wow. THANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOU!!! It's reviewers like you that give life to us writers. And is this story as funny as that movie you watched (Bruce Almighty or Ace Ventura I think)? Wow! I'm still at cloud 9 right now. And I promise!! I will update at least once a week! I will not do schoolwork for the week until the chapter is finished!! *sniff* ASTIG KA TALAGA, KUNG SINO KA MAN!!! (YOU'RE REALLY COOL! WHOEVER YOU ARE!). Now... Hey!! What are you guys looking at???? AND WOULD YOU PLEASE STOP LAUGHING???!!! BACK TO THE STORY!!!
The real Thomas: Oooohhh. The big man has a sensitive side.
The real Me: Oh, just shut up, bitch. You would have reacted like that if this was YOUR first story.
The real Thomas: Oh well. I don't write fics anyway.
(BACK TO THE STORY)
Besa: WHOA!!! They called you dangerous but this is just camel shit!!
Me: C'mon! Don't just ditch me now. I thought you were my friends. You're making me.... arrgghhhh.... ANGRY!!!!!
Thomas: OH SHIT!!!
Me: NYARRRGHHhHhhHhhHh!!!!! *splits into two Me's*
Besa: You asses!!! LOOK AT WHAT YOU DID!!!!!
EA: Trevor? Are you okay? Ummm... are you the white one or the black one?
Me: Oooohh. Where am I?
???: Pretty soon... in hell.
Me: HOLY SHIT!!! WHO ARE YOU????
Thomas: Hey, who's that black guy?
???: I AM NOT BLACK!!! I AM DARK!!!
Me: You must be my evil twin. You look exactly like me.
???: He he he... *gets paper*
Me: Who are you??
???: This is your name right? *Writes my name*
Me: Yes???
???: Then this is mine. *flips it upside-down*
Me: mmm... hmm...
Thomas: HOLY SHIT!!! I THINK SAW THIS IN A MOVIE!!! WHOAH THAT WAS SO WEIRD!!! CLEVER!!!
Rovert: Shut up, you bitch. *makes energy orb and shoots it at Thomas*
*BOOOMM*
Thomas: Nyarkkkk!!! .........you...bastard.
EA: Thomas!!! Get a hold of yourself!!!! SENSEI!!!
Tofu: Wait! Thomas! Don't move! It will just widen the wound!
Thomas: Oooff...
Me: Why the hell did you do that???
Rovert: Kasi ganoon talaga ako. (Because that's how I am.)
Me: Ang sama mo. (You are so evil.)
Rovert: Oka agatala istor mating bok (???????)
Me: Huh?
Rovert: Sorry. I can't speak that well.
Me: He heh. Spell the word "Bote".
Rovert: B..O...
Me: Use our native alphabet.
Rovert: Ba...ho...ta...e
Me, Thomas, EA, Besa, and Bobby: AAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!
Rovert: What?
Me: Hey, Rovert! Say "I have bote". And spell "bote".
Rovert: I have bahotae.
Me, Thomas, EA, Besa, and Bobby: AAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
Rovert: What did I say?
Me: Allow me to translate that. You said "I have stinky shit".
The whole gang: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!
Rovert: You tricked me.
Me: Gee, Rovert. Don't be so gloomy. It was a joke.
Thomas: Besides... EVERYONE'S SHIT IS STINKY!!!
The whole gang: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
EA: Nice one Thomas!!!
Bobby: Hey! Is there something wrong with Rovert?
Rovert: Summoning from the hellish abyss...
Besa: Hello? Helloooo??? Mr. Evil Guy???
Rovert: Awaken the darkest power... *evil aura*
Rovert: Kill them all...
*BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM M!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!*
Thomas, EA, Besa, Bobby: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!
Thomas: We're 30,000 feet in the air!!! AAAAAAA!!!
EA: Hey! How come Trevor, Ranma, and Tofu are not here?
(AT THE RUINS OF TOFU'S CLINIC)
Ranma: AAG.... That was too... powerful. Even for my passive technique.
Tofu: Oofff.... My... back....
Me: Huh? Did someone take our picture? What happened to the roof? And... DAMN!!! WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU?????
Ranma: Demme.... He attacked us.
Tofu: You did not felt it because of your... Charm.
(BACK IN THE ATMOSPHERE)
Bobby: AND I DON'T KNOW MY POWER YET!!!
Thomas: Well, try it!!!!
Bobby: OK! Nghhhhhhh..... *disappears*
EA: WHOAH!! COOOOOLLL! BIOLOGICAL STEALTH CAMO!!
Bobby: Hey! I'm invisible!!! Coooool!!! *punches Thomas*
Thomas: ARRGHH!!! WHY YOU!!! *punches Thomas downwards*
*WHACK!!!*
EA: Ummm, asshole. YOU JUST SENT BOBBY TO HIS DEATH!!!
Besa: You fiend!!!
Thomas: Ahh... who cares... we're falling anyway.
*silence*
Thomas, EA, and Besa: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!
(At the Tendo household)
Soun: Saotome-kun? What's wrong?
Genma: I sense something vivid.
Akane: Saotome-ojiisama?
Genma: Something's about to fall.
Akane: Ahh. He's just having an off-day. Besides, where's Ranma?
Nabiki: Come to think of it Akane, Trevor and the others haven't come back from the clinic yet.
*!!!!CRASH!!!!*
Kasumi: Oh my...
Soun: SAOTOME-KUN?? WHY DID THE TABLE COLLAPSE???
Akane: AND WHY IS THERE SUDDENLY A HOLE IN THE ROOF?????
Bobby: WHADDYA MEAN, COLLAPSE? I'M RIGHT HERE!!!
Akane: AAAAAHHHHH!!!
Bobby: *turns visible again* You are all sons of bi- WHOAH!!! YOU'RE THE TENDOS!!!
Akane: How did you know???
Bobby: You are very famous anime characters in my world!!!
Soun: Oh... you must be one of Trevor's friends!
Nabiki: Strange... I don't remember you.
Bobby: Oh. I just came in today.
Genma: Uhh.. hey boy!!! You're bleeding.
Bobby: What?? Oh shit. ShitshitshitshitshitshitSHIIIITT!!!
Akane: I'll get the bandages!
*Akane runs to the bathroom but suddenly...*
*!!!CRASH!!!*
*!!!CRASH!!!*
Akane: AAAAAAAAHHHH!!! Huh? EA! Thomas!!
EA: Ooooff.... yo.
The real Besa: YO!! Yo, immatatered meh!!
The real Bobby: Ahh... who cares about you, ass??
The real Besa: YO! Da whole Urth loves meh!! Right?
World: WE HATE YOU, BITCH!!!
The real Besa: See wat I meen, yo?
The real Bobby: Riiiiight....
The real Me: HEY!! PAY ATTENTION!!!!
The real Bobby: Die *pulls trigger of M9*
*click* *click*
The real Me: Looking for this, bitch? *holds out M9 magazine*
The real Bobby: Damn you.
(BACK TO THE STORY)
Thomas: Agghh!! I think I twisted my ankle and... BOBBY! Where the hell is Bobby??
Akane: He's at the dining room. He's bleeding badly.
EA: Hey what about Besa???
*!!!CRASH!!!*
Besa: Ooof!! Thanks for breaking my fall, EA.
EA: Aggg!!! Hey! I never knew the last time you wet the bed was...
Besa: YOU DICK!!! HOW DID YOU KNOW???
EA: My Charm, remember?
Besa: Speaking of dick, I am gonna kick yours. If I didn't have this sprained ankle. Ooof.
Akane: Oh great.
Besa: Man! Why did this happen to us?
EA: HEY! We're lucky anime physics apply to us! If it didn't, we would've been dead the moment the clinic exploded!
Besa: Good point.
EA: Right, Thomas?
Thomas: .....
EA: Oh great. He's unconscious.
(AT THE CLINIC)
Me: Guys!! Go to the Dojo! It's too dangerous here!
Ranma: No! I'll stay here!
Me: NO! You could die here! He's way too powerful!!
Ranma: But...
Tofu: He's right. Lets go.
Rovert: HEY! YOU IGNORED ME HERE! *charges energy*
Me: YAME!!!
Ranma: NO! DON'T!!!
Me: RUN AWAY!
*Tofu and Ranma ran away*
Rovert: NO YOU DON'T!!
*I pounced on Rovert just before he shot the blast*
*BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!*
Rovert: *cough* *cough* WHY DID YOU DO THAT?? AND.... Why aren't you dead?
Me: There are just some things we just don't know... do we?
Rovert: Tama ka diyan. (You're right.)
Me: Humanda ka, demonyo. (Get ready, demon.)
*SHOWDOWN*
Rovert: EAT THIS!!! *blast*
*BOOOOOOOM!!!*
Me: Give it up. Get back in my body!
Rovert: No fair! You have a Charm!!!
Me: That's right. Now, GIVE UP ALREADY, BITCH!!!
Miyu: Ummm... Guys?
Me: Miyu! NOOOOO!!
Miyu: I'm sorry about awhile ago and...
Rovert: Chance!!! *grabs Miyu*
Miyu:AAAHHH!!! What are you doing??
Rovert: Move... and she dies.
Me: You bastard.
Rovert: TAKE THIS *blast*
Me: Just give up. You can't kill me like that.
Rovert: Right. I think I found your weakness.
Me: OH SHIT!!!
Rovert: I know about your power.
Me: Shitshitshitshitshitshit!!!
Rovert: You are weak to direct attacks!! *throws knife*
Me: OH SHIT!! *evades*
Rovert: Ha ha ha.
Me: You dick!!!
Thomas: Hey, you can't win this alone. Can you?
Me: Thomas!!! You're back!!!
EA: Right here, pal.
Me: EA!!
Besa: I'm back.
Me: BESA!!!
Bobby: Wazup?
Me: BOBBY!! Guys! You really came!!!
EA: Yeah!!! We're a team...
Rovert: Wow. I think I'm gonna cry. DIE, BITCHES!!! *several blasts*
EA: Don't move!! It's a bluff!!
Rovert: How did you know?
*KABOOOOOMMM*
Thomas: What the fuck is this? CHEESE POWDER!!!
EA: No.... *reads Rovert's mind* it's actually... uhh... right. It is cheese powder.
Besa: See, black guy? 5 charms to one is win win win for us!! *spark*
Thomas: Go Besa!!!
Besa: Right. HHYAAAAAAAAAA!! *electric blast*
EA: WAIT!! NOT THAT STRONG!!! *gets shocked* Nyayayayayaya!!!!
Thomas: Uhh... EA?
EA: *unconscious*
Besa: YAAAAAAAHHHH!!! *electric blast*
Rovert: ARRGGHHH!!!! *lets go of Miyu*
Miyu: Thanks!!! *slaps Rovert* YOU PERVERT!!!
Me: Quick, Miyu! Come here!
Besa: Now. Time to die. *charges electricity*
Rovert: Oh shit!!! *power shield*
Besa: No fair!!!! *several blasts*
*bzzt* *bzzt* *bzzt* *bzzt*
Rovert: *shield breaks* NOOOOOO!!!!
EA: Ok! *reads Rovert's mind* THOMAS!!! NOW!!!!
Thomas: KANGAROO FIST!!!! *lunges a punch*
Rovert: *gets blown back* NYARRKKKKGHHHH!!!!
Thomas: YES!!!
EA: *reads Rovert's mind* Bobby! Pin him down!!
Bobby: Roger! *disappears*
Rovert: Now... what are you up to?
EA: Heheheheh.
Rovert: OOOFF!!! YOU ARE WEARING METAL SOLES DAMMIT!!!
Bobby: Heh heh.
Rovert: RGHHH... Now the biggest blast of them all *charges*
Me: Get outta there, Bobby!!!!
EA: *reads Rovert's mind* TREVOR!!! DO IT!!!
Me: RIGHT!! *jumps onto Rovert*
Rovert: GRAAAAAA!!! *big damn blast*
*blast bounces off of me and hits him*
*BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!*
Me: It is finished....
*Rovert is in ashes*
EA: Yes!!! We defeated him... or IT!!
Me: Yep. Ooff.. Man. I see spots. That was way too bright.
*SHOWDOWN ENDS*
Bobby: Well, lets go home.
Besa: RIGHT!! I AM HUNGRYYYYYYYY!!!!
Me: Well. I hope there aren't any more Discharms.
The real Me: WHOOOOOOOOOOO!! Chapter end!!
The real Besa: Dat was a grayyyt endin'!!!
The real EA: Nice one!!
The real Thomas: Yeah. But will Rovert come back?
The real Me: Count on it.
The real Bobby: Hey! Eat lead assholes!! *fires M4 everywhere*
*!!!! ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta !!!!*
The real Me: Bobby's blew his stack again!! Thomas!! Show the sneak peek!!
The real Thomas: ROGER!!!
-------------------------------------
Thomas: What are you talking about?
Me: You just made the biggest mistake of your life.
Thomas: Huh?
Ranma: Good luck, and good bye!!!
EA: Yeah. You are DOOMED, man.
Me: Yeah. You were such a dumbass. WHY THE FUCK DID YOU SAY YES???
Ranma: Well, see you at the funeral guys.
Akane: Guys?
Me: AAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!! SHE'S HERE!!!
EA: Quick, Thomas!! SAY YOUR PRAYERS!!!
Me: AAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
Akane: Thomas-kun!!!!
Thomas: SHITTTTT!!!
Akane: *vein pops out of head* You guys better be not talking about THIS!!! *removes cloth*
Thomas: SHIIITTT!!!! NOOOoOooooooOOOOOOoOoO!! Shitshitshitshitshitshitshit!!!!
EA and Me: AAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!!!
--------------------------------------------
EA: End the chapter now!!!!
Bobby: GRRRRAAAA *continues firing*
*!!!! ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta !!!!*
*camera gets hit*
*static*
FFFFFFFSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!
*We are experiencing technical difficulties at the moment. Please stay tuned for the next chapter!*
*OFF THE AIR*