Title: Le Plus Faible
Author: Meg Kenobi (afirmation@aol.com)
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter. Sorry.
Author's note: Disturbing piece here, kids. Just enjoy and review and please tell me if you think the rating ought to be higher. We've reached the ending! Huzzah! Not that is a particularly happy ending, per se . . .
Le Plus Faible
----------------
Every time he has beaten me, cursed at me, spat at me, I have found my fault in retrospect. It is easy to blame yourself once you know what to look for; that petty but all important moment of selfishness or neglect. He was drunk that night. That is my first excuse; I should have made a show of putting him to bed, assuring him the Ministry was not going to collapse on his head. But our daughter was sick and I was exhausted. I heard him slam the door, cursing, and falling up the stairs, and yet I was so tired I did not react. I could have changed the ending a thousand ways, but I simply lay prone and overcome with ennui.
He was slamming around our room then, stripping himself and tripping over his feet as he fought desperately and clumsily with his bootlaces. I implored him to be quiet, and in response he hurtled the boot he had just loosened as hard as he could at the wall.
"Lucius, please, you'll wake them," I whispered, my eyes glancing anxiously at the door, wondering if I had the nerve to go shut the nursery door and ours before letting him do what he wanted with me. The baby had been feverish all day and the last thing I wanted was for her to awake now to the sound of blows landing.
"Sod off," he screamed. He was ripping at the buttons of his shirt, but suddenly changed tack and came at me. I was no stranger to submission and violation, but the baby had begun to cry. He climbed on top of me and started to claw at neck, my collar, and I did the most foolish thing I have ever done. I pushed him away. He seemed shocked at first, but came at me again, hitting my face hard enough to send me reeling, falling back against the bed. I should have stopped, let him have his way, and then worried about Bella, but she was sobbing. I rose defiantly and walked out of the room, leaving him in a stupor. I only got as far as the nursery door before he was on me again.
"You whore!" He was hollering as he struck blindly at me, "You whore, you neglect me to see to some other man's bastard child?"
"She's your child, Lucius," I hollered through my tears. He hit me again, but I shoved him fiercely. The alcohol raging in his blood upset his equilibrium, and he toppled backwards. I seized the moment to dash into the nursery, latching the door swiftly. I gathered my infant girl in my arms and whispered to her that it would be all right. Her face was swollen with hives from her desperate sobs. Lucius was pounding on the door, screaming and cursing. I held my daughter close to my chest and hummed a long forgotten lullaby. Lucius screamed that he would kill me, but I sat down in the rocker to soothe my baby. I was so enraptured by her delicate perfection, that I did not notice the moment in which the screaming stopped; I did not notice until a concerted blast from his wand blew the door of its hinges, and he stalked into the room, a murderous glint in his eye.
"You wouldn't be the first sobbing mother I watched be killed, whore," he growled, but I was certain it was a lie. He was drunk and he had dropped his wand. The baby was nearly asleep. I could put her to bed and lead him to take his anger out downstairs so that she might sleep. I was such a fool.
He moved with surprising speed and dexterity despite his intoxication. He ripped Bella from my arms before I could react.
"Why?" He was demanding to know, screaming at the top of his lungs, holding her at arms length, "Our world, our life is falling apart, and all you can worry about is this foul abomination?!" He was shaking her violently and I found myself unable to do anything but reach toward him helplessly, my arms outstretched towards my baby girl. It was like trying to wrestle a child from a werewolf; I did not dare to move too suddenly for fear of provoking him further, and in turn causing more harm to my baby.
"Lucius, I'm sorry, I'll do whatever you want to make it up to you, just put her down," I was trying to keep my voice level, but I was shaking. He had hit Draco before, but never in front of me. I was so selfish; I never realized before that moment that his anger could hurt anyone but me. I had no idea how to protect someone from him. I had never bothered to protect myself.
"You can never make it up -- STOP CRYING!" He had slammed her suddenly and sharply against the dresser with the force normally reserved for breaking the bones in my face. She stopped crying. Stopped moving. Her tiny birdlike heart fluttered to a stop.
"No. No!" He placed her limp form in my arms without reverence. He leaned to my ear and hissed in the viper's voice.
"This is your fault, Narcissa, all your fault. You did not protect your baby. Did not please your son and husband. You are a vain and self absorbed woman. This is a lesson you sorely needed to learn. You left your family alone and because of you your Bella is dead. You killed her yourself." I clutched the cold, dead child to my chest, sobbing as I turned helplessly to the door.
"Draco!" I cried out. He stood there, watching. And then my son began to speak.
"I hate you," he spat and turned away.
-----------------
Thank you! Please review!
Author: Meg Kenobi (afirmation@aol.com)
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter. Sorry.
Author's note: Disturbing piece here, kids. Just enjoy and review and please tell me if you think the rating ought to be higher. We've reached the ending! Huzzah! Not that is a particularly happy ending, per se . . .
Le Plus Faible
----------------
Every time he has beaten me, cursed at me, spat at me, I have found my fault in retrospect. It is easy to blame yourself once you know what to look for; that petty but all important moment of selfishness or neglect. He was drunk that night. That is my first excuse; I should have made a show of putting him to bed, assuring him the Ministry was not going to collapse on his head. But our daughter was sick and I was exhausted. I heard him slam the door, cursing, and falling up the stairs, and yet I was so tired I did not react. I could have changed the ending a thousand ways, but I simply lay prone and overcome with ennui.
He was slamming around our room then, stripping himself and tripping over his feet as he fought desperately and clumsily with his bootlaces. I implored him to be quiet, and in response he hurtled the boot he had just loosened as hard as he could at the wall.
"Lucius, please, you'll wake them," I whispered, my eyes glancing anxiously at the door, wondering if I had the nerve to go shut the nursery door and ours before letting him do what he wanted with me. The baby had been feverish all day and the last thing I wanted was for her to awake now to the sound of blows landing.
"Sod off," he screamed. He was ripping at the buttons of his shirt, but suddenly changed tack and came at me. I was no stranger to submission and violation, but the baby had begun to cry. He climbed on top of me and started to claw at neck, my collar, and I did the most foolish thing I have ever done. I pushed him away. He seemed shocked at first, but came at me again, hitting my face hard enough to send me reeling, falling back against the bed. I should have stopped, let him have his way, and then worried about Bella, but she was sobbing. I rose defiantly and walked out of the room, leaving him in a stupor. I only got as far as the nursery door before he was on me again.
"You whore!" He was hollering as he struck blindly at me, "You whore, you neglect me to see to some other man's bastard child?"
"She's your child, Lucius," I hollered through my tears. He hit me again, but I shoved him fiercely. The alcohol raging in his blood upset his equilibrium, and he toppled backwards. I seized the moment to dash into the nursery, latching the door swiftly. I gathered my infant girl in my arms and whispered to her that it would be all right. Her face was swollen with hives from her desperate sobs. Lucius was pounding on the door, screaming and cursing. I held my daughter close to my chest and hummed a long forgotten lullaby. Lucius screamed that he would kill me, but I sat down in the rocker to soothe my baby. I was so enraptured by her delicate perfection, that I did not notice the moment in which the screaming stopped; I did not notice until a concerted blast from his wand blew the door of its hinges, and he stalked into the room, a murderous glint in his eye.
"You wouldn't be the first sobbing mother I watched be killed, whore," he growled, but I was certain it was a lie. He was drunk and he had dropped his wand. The baby was nearly asleep. I could put her to bed and lead him to take his anger out downstairs so that she might sleep. I was such a fool.
He moved with surprising speed and dexterity despite his intoxication. He ripped Bella from my arms before I could react.
"Why?" He was demanding to know, screaming at the top of his lungs, holding her at arms length, "Our world, our life is falling apart, and all you can worry about is this foul abomination?!" He was shaking her violently and I found myself unable to do anything but reach toward him helplessly, my arms outstretched towards my baby girl. It was like trying to wrestle a child from a werewolf; I did not dare to move too suddenly for fear of provoking him further, and in turn causing more harm to my baby.
"Lucius, I'm sorry, I'll do whatever you want to make it up to you, just put her down," I was trying to keep my voice level, but I was shaking. He had hit Draco before, but never in front of me. I was so selfish; I never realized before that moment that his anger could hurt anyone but me. I had no idea how to protect someone from him. I had never bothered to protect myself.
"You can never make it up -- STOP CRYING!" He had slammed her suddenly and sharply against the dresser with the force normally reserved for breaking the bones in my face. She stopped crying. Stopped moving. Her tiny birdlike heart fluttered to a stop.
"No. No!" He placed her limp form in my arms without reverence. He leaned to my ear and hissed in the viper's voice.
"This is your fault, Narcissa, all your fault. You did not protect your baby. Did not please your son and husband. You are a vain and self absorbed woman. This is a lesson you sorely needed to learn. You left your family alone and because of you your Bella is dead. You killed her yourself." I clutched the cold, dead child to my chest, sobbing as I turned helplessly to the door.
"Draco!" I cried out. He stood there, watching. And then my son began to speak.
"I hate you," he spat and turned away.
-----------------
Thank you! Please review!