Robin leaped into the passenger side as the Batmobile shot past. Batgirl retrieved the remote control from beside her and manipulated it based on having watched the Joker use it. She guided the speeding Batmobile through a series of shaky turns to get it headed back in the opposite direction.

As they drove past the groggy William Wumpington, Batgirl shook her head in regret. "First he gets robbed by the Siren, and now this. This just isn't his week."

Robin noticed Wumpington for the first time. "Gosh, how many people did you run over, Batgirl?"

"As if I had any say in it," Batgirl said in disgust, gesturing at her restrained arm. "I need two hands to operate this. Help me get these coils off and turn this device off!"

Chief O'Hara was astonished to see the Batmobile go careening crazily past the light his squad car had just pulled up to.

"Mother McKree! What on earth d'ye suppose brought on that kind of drivin'?"

He started to turn to go after the weaving vehicle, but his sidekick tapped him on the shoulder and pointed in the direction the Batmobile had just come from.

"Chief, there's a man over there who can barely stay on his feet. And isn't that the Joker not far beyond him?"

"The woily divil himself!" O'Hara gasped, astonished at the sight of the purple-clad villain laid sprawled out on the pavement. "Come on, we'd better clap him in irons until we figure out his part in all this."

*****

Working as a team, the Robin and Batgirl quickly deduced how to disable the remote, free her arm, and return full control to the driver's seat.

"Thanks," she said. "You know, for awhile, you had me worried that you were really going to kill Commissioner Gordon."

"Aw, you know me better than that, Batgirl! Batman's had me practice 'Plan 47Z' so often that I know the words by heart now! I wasn't sure that our turncoat routine would fool anybody, but I guess you can't underestimate the Joker! Gosh, how far back to the warehouse?"

Back at the warehouse, the two thugs' had their attention focused on the scantily-clad Undine. The comely moll had found a camera to record Batman's execution for posterity, but now there were problems with the flash bulb. The henchmen watched intently as she fiddled in frustration with her camera, trying to get it to operate. Like true gentlemen, they politely refrained from murdering Batman until she finally gave them the thumbs up sign.

Smiling, Undine eagerly framed up her shot as the two thugs took careful aim at Batman's skull. The goons paused as they heard the great roar of a high powered engine, and turned to see the Batmobile rocketing towards them.

"Look out! They're tryin' to run us over!"

They took several quick steps away from each other to place themselves out of the path of the oncoming vehicle. As Batgirl steered the Batmobile between the vile pair, Robin declared, "Hold on for Emergency Bat-Turn!!

He wrenched down a handle in the door of the Batmobile, unleashing a large pair of parachutes from the back of the car. The gun-wielding hoodlums were instantly swept off their feet, consumed by the twin parachutes. The Batmobile whipped a U-turn around Batman's crate and screeched to a halt. The goons grunted as they tumbled and rolled across the concrete floor to land in a billowy white heap.

From his place in the crate, Batman heard four SMACKS! in rapid succession. Batgirl and Robin were pummeling the engulfed, thrashing thugs senseless. Batman smiled proudly as his protégés made short work of the foul gang.

As could be expected, the second the Joker's underlings had been dispatched and all signs of threat eliminated, police sirens began wailing urgently in the distance. Nothing drew Chief O'Hara's men like the scent of unconscious felons.

*****

A short time later, Commissioner Gordon found himself the recipient of unwelcome news at Police Headquarters.

"What?" Gordon said, staring at the phone incredulously. "Reports of home burglaries flooding in? All of the victims recently visited by employees of the Census Bureau? Great Scott! Get me the Census Bureau Director…and get me Batman!"

*****

At that moment, the Batmobile was arriving home at its cavernous headquarters. As the rotating parking pad automatically turned the stopped vehicle to point back in the opposite direction, the Dynamic Duo disembarked to be greeted by their faithful butler.

"Welcome home, Master Bruce and Master Dick," said Alfred. "I'm quite relieved to see you both home safe. And may I offer my congratulations on apprehending the Joker; a job well done."

"Thank you, Alfred," Batman replied. "All credit should be attributed to Robin and Batgirl's intrepid efforts."

A lightbulb went off in Alfred's head. "Oh, lest I forget, I have boxed up the items you requested and arranged for their destruction and removal."

"What's being destroyed and removed?" asked Robin. He saw that a row of neatly organized boxes lined the wall of the cave. He read the precise printed lettering from the top of the nearest box.

"Why, it's the old Bat Erupting-Volcano-Detector! I always hoped we'd get a chance to use it in the field!"

Batman nodded. "As did I, with the Bat Ghost-Repellent and our other polter-cides. Their development seemed so vital at the time."

The red phone lit up. Being the closest to it, Batman seized the receiver. "Yes, Commissioner?" He nodded calmly, then froze, his eyes widening inside the slits of his cowl.

In the meantime, Robin continued looking over the treasure-trove of unused devices. "And we're throwing out the Bat Gang-Plank-Extender finally? That thing's been gathering dust for years!"

Alfred coughed discreetly. "I beg to differ, sir."

Batman looked grim as he hung up the phone. Robin was still engrossed in discovering the contents of each box.

"Gosh, Batman, are you getting rid of the Bat Music-Analyzer too?"

Batman was staring off into space, his face solemn. "Do we dare? Can we afford to part with even a single item in our crime-fighting arsenal? Yesterday I had dismissed the Bat Gravity-Reversal-Corrector as a colorful, but space-wasting extravagance. Today….I just don't know!

"Holy Indecision!" said Robin. "Sounds like that phone call has you second-guessing yourself."

"Might I point out, sir, that even a structure as impressive as the Batcave does have its spatial limitations," offered Alfred. "You cannot keep everything."

Batman paused to consider Alfred's words, then nodded grimly. "You're right, Alfred! I'm letting my concern over these new crimes turn me into a packBat!"

Alfred briefly considered resigning over his employer's play on words, but his unswerving loyalty prevailed. Batman had, after all, saved his favorite lookalike cousin. "Commissioner Gordon bears grim tidings, sir?"

Yeah, what'd he say?" asked Robin.

"I'll explain on the way," said Batman. "Come on!"