Title: Twistedness and wickedness don't mix with reality, in some cases.
lol
author: me
rating: N/A. lol nah, its R because of the ...well you'll see why. lol
disclaimer: I own nothing except for the lovely characters that came from my totally awesomely wicked mind. Other characters came form their respective owners/creators and all the other people and/or places mentioned here are not owned by me, they're either owned by themselves or the WWE owns them. EXCEPT FOR THE ODD "THINGS" IN HERE THEY ARE OWNED BY THE PEOPLE THAT MADE THEM, AND AMANDA LAND IS OWNDE BY ME
distribution: ya want it? Ask. If you're lucky, I might say yes
AUTHORS NOTE: THIS IS MY DESPRATE ATTEMPT TO WRITE SOMETHIN FUNNY. LOL. HOPE YOU LIKE IT EVEN THOUGH CHANCES ARE YOU WON'T FIND IT FUNNY OR WON'T UNDERSTAND IT. IN THAT CASE, BLAME ME BECAUSE ITS ALL WRITTEN OUT OF AMADNA LAND AFTER WATCHIN PUFF THE MAGIC DRAGON. FYI THAT INTRODUCED ME TO AMANDA LAND. LOL. SO WATCH IT AND YOU MIGHT UNDERSTAND THIS. LOL.
Summary: WHAT HAPPENS WHEN NORMAL PEOPLE GO TO AMANDA LAND? hehehehehe
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
narrator: we come upon Vincent K. McMahon's office, which is hosting nine WWE Superstars and Divas, one Vince, and one shrink. No one is talking until now.
Someone: .........*crickets chirp* ........*Pin drops* ........*Wind blows*
narrator: DAMNT I SAID UNTIL NOW!
Everyone: aflbalhflsahglkahflh
narrator: ONE PERSON!
Vince: okay so Dr. whatever the hell your name is. What's wrong with them?
Shrink dude: well I'm not sure Mr. whatever the hell your name is. *Smirks while Vince growls* but I do know your workers don't work anymore.
Vince: what do you mean they don't work anymore
shrink: they don't work. That's it. They just won't work.
Vince: I don't believe you.
Shrink dude: fine. See that pen? Throw it at one of the superstars.
Vince: *picks up pen and throws it at Matt Hardy* nothing.
Shrink: told you. Try with someone else.
Vince: omg Jeff, your hairs a normal color.
Jeff: ..............
Vince: holy crap sable your boob popped!
Sable..........
Vince: randy your brand new car just got ran over by Lita, and Lita, Matt wants to marry you, and Victoria you just lost your belt to a blonde molly holly and Trish you aren't babe of the year this year!
Everyone:...................
Shrink: see. Nothing.
Vince: well what do I do now? I have 9 broken superstars.
Shrink dude: there's nothing you can do. Sorry. *Walks away*
Vince: crap. *Walks away then turns around and jumps in edge's face in hopes to scare him.* damn. Nothing. *Walks out of the room.*
someone: *whistles Barbie girl by Aqua while passing the office* why hello. Who are you?
Uh:............
someone: oh I'm so dumb. That's the mirror and that's my reflection. *Giggles.* oh no! Did my lip gloss wear off?! *Runs inside the room and goes to the mirror* thank God for bras. *Pulls out lip gloss from bra and re applies it.* just like brand new *sticks it back in before turning around and noticing the nine other people in there.* Well now I know for a fact you're not my reflection. *She laughed.* Oh I'm so stupid. I haven't introduced myself yet. Hi. I'm Barbie. *She laughed as she stuck her hand out to one of the two blondes in the room.
Trish:..........
Barbie: okay. Hi I'm Barbie *sticks out hand to the other people
other people:................
Barbie: ohhhh I get it. You're playing Simon says. Okay ill be Simon since whoever was playing it stopped. Okay. Simon says, jump up and down.
Everyone:..................
Barbie: hmmm. Okay speak
everyone.........
Barbie: Simon says roll over? Play dead? Do something!
Everyone:............
Barbie: pooperssss! Ooooo I know! Simon says stare at me.
Everyone: *stares cause that's what they've been doing*
barbie:...YAY! Okay well I think I know what's wrong with you people, so now I'm going to fix you. Okay *reaches in bra and grabs lipstick, compact, perfume, cell phone and platinum visa.* I think that's it. Oh wait. I forgot some more. * Reaches in her pocket in her mini skirt and pulls out gum and cell phone, while something falls to the floor.* OOPS. Should prolly put that back* she reaches down and picks up the condom, sticking it back in her back pocket. * Okay. *She heads over to one of the walls in the office and starts to draw outlines of all of the people in the room with her lipstick. Then she walks over to them and plows a poof of powder in Trish's face, causing a pinkish see throughish Trish to appear.* Yay it worked. *Grabs the pink trish and sticks her on the wall, causing her to come alive on the wall, while her real body lies limp on the floor.* now onto everyone else.* does it to everyone else until all the bodies are on the ground and the souls are on the wall, alive.* YIPPIE!* then takes credit cards and cuts out each person.* Hello. *Smiles.*
randy: who are you darlin?
Barbie: I'm Barbie and I'm your tour guide for this evening.
Molly: tour guide for what?
Barbie: well Amanda land of course.
Sable: I don't want to go! I have a doctor's appointment!
Trish: and I have a photo shoot.
Jeff: I have to re dye my hair.
Edge: yeah well I have to go and buy more leather pants.
Lita: and I need to go to the animal shelter.
Matt: yeah I gotta go get some more MF'ers.
Victoria: I got the woman's belt.
Barbie: I need to go fuck ken.
Narrator: BARBIE! You are not doing such a thing, and all you damn idiots are going with Barbie and that's final, got it?
Everyone: who are you?
Narrator: I'm the damn narrator. Got a problem with it?
Everyone: no
narrator: good. Now Barbie pop that gum in your mouth, spray your perfume, call a cab and stick everything back in your bra. Everyone else, follow Barbie to Amanda land.
Everyone: o-kay.
Narrator: I like being in charge. *Changes voice to announcement dude voice* ANYWAYS, BARBIE AND THE OTHERS ARE GOING TO AMANDA LAND. WHATS GOING TO HAPPEN? AND WHAT IS AMANDA LAND? STAY TUNED TO FIND OUT, *switches back to regular voice* I SAID CALL THE DAMN CAB SERVICE NOT A FUCKING SERVICE BARBIE! AND JEFF WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?! GIVE THAT CONDOM BACK TO BARBIE, AND TRISH, SABLE, PUT YOUR T-SHIRTS BACK ON! Ay curumba. DAMNT RANDY, DONT MAKE ME COME AFTER YOU, PUT THAT THING BACK WHERE IT BELONGS, YEAH YOU HEARD ME, ZIP UP THOSE DOCKERS!
END OF FIRST CHAP; TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK. LOL
author: me
rating: N/A. lol nah, its R because of the ...well you'll see why. lol
disclaimer: I own nothing except for the lovely characters that came from my totally awesomely wicked mind. Other characters came form their respective owners/creators and all the other people and/or places mentioned here are not owned by me, they're either owned by themselves or the WWE owns them. EXCEPT FOR THE ODD "THINGS" IN HERE THEY ARE OWNED BY THE PEOPLE THAT MADE THEM, AND AMANDA LAND IS OWNDE BY ME
distribution: ya want it? Ask. If you're lucky, I might say yes
AUTHORS NOTE: THIS IS MY DESPRATE ATTEMPT TO WRITE SOMETHIN FUNNY. LOL. HOPE YOU LIKE IT EVEN THOUGH CHANCES ARE YOU WON'T FIND IT FUNNY OR WON'T UNDERSTAND IT. IN THAT CASE, BLAME ME BECAUSE ITS ALL WRITTEN OUT OF AMADNA LAND AFTER WATCHIN PUFF THE MAGIC DRAGON. FYI THAT INTRODUCED ME TO AMANDA LAND. LOL. SO WATCH IT AND YOU MIGHT UNDERSTAND THIS. LOL.
Summary: WHAT HAPPENS WHEN NORMAL PEOPLE GO TO AMANDA LAND? hehehehehe
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
narrator: we come upon Vincent K. McMahon's office, which is hosting nine WWE Superstars and Divas, one Vince, and one shrink. No one is talking until now.
Someone: .........*crickets chirp* ........*Pin drops* ........*Wind blows*
narrator: DAMNT I SAID UNTIL NOW!
Everyone: aflbalhflsahglkahflh
narrator: ONE PERSON!
Vince: okay so Dr. whatever the hell your name is. What's wrong with them?
Shrink dude: well I'm not sure Mr. whatever the hell your name is. *Smirks while Vince growls* but I do know your workers don't work anymore.
Vince: what do you mean they don't work anymore
shrink: they don't work. That's it. They just won't work.
Vince: I don't believe you.
Shrink dude: fine. See that pen? Throw it at one of the superstars.
Vince: *picks up pen and throws it at Matt Hardy* nothing.
Shrink: told you. Try with someone else.
Vince: omg Jeff, your hairs a normal color.
Jeff: ..............
Vince: holy crap sable your boob popped!
Sable..........
Vince: randy your brand new car just got ran over by Lita, and Lita, Matt wants to marry you, and Victoria you just lost your belt to a blonde molly holly and Trish you aren't babe of the year this year!
Everyone:...................
Shrink: see. Nothing.
Vince: well what do I do now? I have 9 broken superstars.
Shrink dude: there's nothing you can do. Sorry. *Walks away*
Vince: crap. *Walks away then turns around and jumps in edge's face in hopes to scare him.* damn. Nothing. *Walks out of the room.*
someone: *whistles Barbie girl by Aqua while passing the office* why hello. Who are you?
Uh:............
someone: oh I'm so dumb. That's the mirror and that's my reflection. *Giggles.* oh no! Did my lip gloss wear off?! *Runs inside the room and goes to the mirror* thank God for bras. *Pulls out lip gloss from bra and re applies it.* just like brand new *sticks it back in before turning around and noticing the nine other people in there.* Well now I know for a fact you're not my reflection. *She laughed.* Oh I'm so stupid. I haven't introduced myself yet. Hi. I'm Barbie. *She laughed as she stuck her hand out to one of the two blondes in the room.
Trish:..........
Barbie: okay. Hi I'm Barbie *sticks out hand to the other people
other people:................
Barbie: ohhhh I get it. You're playing Simon says. Okay ill be Simon since whoever was playing it stopped. Okay. Simon says, jump up and down.
Everyone:..................
Barbie: hmmm. Okay speak
everyone.........
Barbie: Simon says roll over? Play dead? Do something!
Everyone:............
Barbie: pooperssss! Ooooo I know! Simon says stare at me.
Everyone: *stares cause that's what they've been doing*
barbie:...YAY! Okay well I think I know what's wrong with you people, so now I'm going to fix you. Okay *reaches in bra and grabs lipstick, compact, perfume, cell phone and platinum visa.* I think that's it. Oh wait. I forgot some more. * Reaches in her pocket in her mini skirt and pulls out gum and cell phone, while something falls to the floor.* OOPS. Should prolly put that back* she reaches down and picks up the condom, sticking it back in her back pocket. * Okay. *She heads over to one of the walls in the office and starts to draw outlines of all of the people in the room with her lipstick. Then she walks over to them and plows a poof of powder in Trish's face, causing a pinkish see throughish Trish to appear.* Yay it worked. *Grabs the pink trish and sticks her on the wall, causing her to come alive on the wall, while her real body lies limp on the floor.* now onto everyone else.* does it to everyone else until all the bodies are on the ground and the souls are on the wall, alive.* YIPPIE!* then takes credit cards and cuts out each person.* Hello. *Smiles.*
randy: who are you darlin?
Barbie: I'm Barbie and I'm your tour guide for this evening.
Molly: tour guide for what?
Barbie: well Amanda land of course.
Sable: I don't want to go! I have a doctor's appointment!
Trish: and I have a photo shoot.
Jeff: I have to re dye my hair.
Edge: yeah well I have to go and buy more leather pants.
Lita: and I need to go to the animal shelter.
Matt: yeah I gotta go get some more MF'ers.
Victoria: I got the woman's belt.
Barbie: I need to go fuck ken.
Narrator: BARBIE! You are not doing such a thing, and all you damn idiots are going with Barbie and that's final, got it?
Everyone: who are you?
Narrator: I'm the damn narrator. Got a problem with it?
Everyone: no
narrator: good. Now Barbie pop that gum in your mouth, spray your perfume, call a cab and stick everything back in your bra. Everyone else, follow Barbie to Amanda land.
Everyone: o-kay.
Narrator: I like being in charge. *Changes voice to announcement dude voice* ANYWAYS, BARBIE AND THE OTHERS ARE GOING TO AMANDA LAND. WHATS GOING TO HAPPEN? AND WHAT IS AMANDA LAND? STAY TUNED TO FIND OUT, *switches back to regular voice* I SAID CALL THE DAMN CAB SERVICE NOT A FUCKING SERVICE BARBIE! AND JEFF WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?! GIVE THAT CONDOM BACK TO BARBIE, AND TRISH, SABLE, PUT YOUR T-SHIRTS BACK ON! Ay curumba. DAMNT RANDY, DONT MAKE ME COME AFTER YOU, PUT THAT THING BACK WHERE IT BELONGS, YEAH YOU HEARD ME, ZIP UP THOSE DOCKERS!
END OF FIRST CHAP; TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK. LOL