The Legend Zelda Wind Whacker
Chapter 7
Narrator: We last off with Link entered the forsaken fortress to save his piece of shit sister, after almost getting crapped on, having to river dance and fighting an evil bokoblin that was killed on the site. Link finally finds his sister only for a giant bird to pick him up and throw him helluva far Mr.T style. Man I feel sorry for the little fella risking his life only to get his pansy ass handed to him by a bird. Hell what am I doing here anyways, I gotta go have sex with my girlfriend, screw you guys I'm outta here.
*The scene opens up with Link waking up, he looks around to find himself on a boat*
Link: Where am I?
*The boat turns its head and opens its mouth*
Boat: Hello child, I see you have awakened.
Link: Holy hell on a mokey's ass a talking boat from hell, you must be here to take me to the underworld.
Boat: No atually I require your assistance.
Link: Mkay
Boat: I am the King of red lions.
Link: Can I call you sally?
KORL: No.
Link: Why not?
KORL: Because I say so.
Link; Poopsicles.
KORL: In order to save your sister you must first have enough power to defeat the bird.
Link: Why?
KORL: Because the bird was just being easy on you, next time you fight it it's going to take a big shit on you.
Link: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!
KORL: Now I will tell you of someone who you will meet later in the story.
*the screen changes to a black background with fire flowing and some guy standing there*
KORL: His name is Ganondorf, he is the king of evil, he is so evil that little children cry at the site of him, he is so evil that he stole the crows jewels shoved them up his ass and game them back, he is so evil that he hires evil goblins that can take a dump on you all he wants. That is how evil he is. Supposedly he got he's supposed to be dead, but no death isn't good enough for him, he has to kick death in the hiny and steal his gummy bears, while eating ice cream and dancing the river dance, that is how evil he is.
Link: Dang that's evil.
KORL: I need you to go get a sword that will turn out to be useless against him and will require you to power it up in two annoying dungeons. Sadly as I am now I cannot help you. So your gonna have to get me a sail in that island that is placed right next to us.
Link: Ok
To be continued....
Chapter 7
Narrator: We last off with Link entered the forsaken fortress to save his piece of shit sister, after almost getting crapped on, having to river dance and fighting an evil bokoblin that was killed on the site. Link finally finds his sister only for a giant bird to pick him up and throw him helluva far Mr.T style. Man I feel sorry for the little fella risking his life only to get his pansy ass handed to him by a bird. Hell what am I doing here anyways, I gotta go have sex with my girlfriend, screw you guys I'm outta here.
*The scene opens up with Link waking up, he looks around to find himself on a boat*
Link: Where am I?
*The boat turns its head and opens its mouth*
Boat: Hello child, I see you have awakened.
Link: Holy hell on a mokey's ass a talking boat from hell, you must be here to take me to the underworld.
Boat: No atually I require your assistance.
Link: Mkay
Boat: I am the King of red lions.
Link: Can I call you sally?
KORL: No.
Link: Why not?
KORL: Because I say so.
Link; Poopsicles.
KORL: In order to save your sister you must first have enough power to defeat the bird.
Link: Why?
KORL: Because the bird was just being easy on you, next time you fight it it's going to take a big shit on you.
Link: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!
KORL: Now I will tell you of someone who you will meet later in the story.
*the screen changes to a black background with fire flowing and some guy standing there*
KORL: His name is Ganondorf, he is the king of evil, he is so evil that little children cry at the site of him, he is so evil that he stole the crows jewels shoved them up his ass and game them back, he is so evil that he hires evil goblins that can take a dump on you all he wants. That is how evil he is. Supposedly he got he's supposed to be dead, but no death isn't good enough for him, he has to kick death in the hiny and steal his gummy bears, while eating ice cream and dancing the river dance, that is how evil he is.
Link: Dang that's evil.
KORL: I need you to go get a sword that will turn out to be useless against him and will require you to power it up in two annoying dungeons. Sadly as I am now I cannot help you. So your gonna have to get me a sail in that island that is placed right next to us.
Link: Ok
To be continued....