Author's Note: I do sooooooooooo apologise for the long wait. Has it been almost two months? I was worked off my feet and was really glad that I had already finished this story and that there was only the epilogue to go because there's no way I would be able to cope with all my commitments as well as continuing to write this story. And I wanted to provide a decent ending too! Thank you sooooooooo much for your patience! I am really grateful to all my wonderful readers for their understanding and for not flaming me! I hope you will like this epilogue. I will update this again a few days later to acknowledge all my readers. However, let me just add a personal note to all of you who have been reading this story and especially those who have reviewed.

This story would never have been written without all your encouraging comments, your constant support and loyalty, your constructive input, insightful comments and all the undeserving praise that you have so kindly and generously provided. This epilogue is dedicated to all of you! I actually have 2 more endings that I have passed in favour for this. I will briefly describe them in a subsequent chapter so that I will be able to answer any question regarding this story as well. Once again, my most heartfelt thanks to my wonderful readers.

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the frustrated writer: Hi hi! Good hearing from you. Sorry I had been very busy. Thanks so much for your concern and I look forward to catching up with your story some time soon!!

Kaio: Ah my most loyal reviewer! I do so apologise for this late update !!!! Really really didn't mean to make you all wait. Sorry, sorry, sorry ... ... You reviews did motivate me to write more as soon as I can (even though I only slept 4 hours last night).

Purple: A new reader! Thanks so much for your kind comments. I hope you will enjoy this last "real" chapter!

GreenCookie: Hi! Thanks for your invitation! I will visit your site as soon as my commitments allow.

twilightstarz: Yes, our dear Rui is effectively a "walking corpse" after the terrible experience. I thought no one could survive that unscathed. Sorry for this late update!

.:: Stacey ::. (perfectionisimpossible@hotmail.com): Hi ! I hope all is well with your grandfather. More to happen in this final epilogue – did you manage to guess it correctly? Thanks so much for your constant support as always!

Magicalfoci: I hope that Tsukasa wasn't too OCC! Sorry about the confusion caused by all the hints ;) !!! The whole capture ... ... well, the plot I had intended to convey is that Shizuka has been working as a double agent. She was loyal to J's agency and got recruited in another agency in order to spy for this side. J had masterminded the destruction of the agency, but in order for his plan to succeed Shizuka had to gain their trust and in the end because the circumstances, Rui was the best "sacrificial lamb". His identity was revealed to them, leading to his capture and J's "counter-attack". Was this in line with what you had thought? Thanks so much again for your kind comments and I really love reading your insight!

Angel72: Ah I see that I had destroyed Shizuka's standing completely with you!!! Thanks so much for reading and I'm so glad that her character is able to make an impact with you!

angel310: Thanks so much for your well wishes and again, I must really apologise for taking so long to churn this last chapter up. I wanted to do a proper job rather than a slipshod one. Really interesting to read your point of view about the past events and I'm so glad that you caught onto what Shizuka had been doing!!!!

kensingtonkid: Another of my most loyal readers! I must really thank you for always motivating me to continue. It's readers like you that give me the final push to complete this story and thanks so much for your encouraging comments all along. Thank you so much!!!! About J, well to stand in his shoes, that's his job i.e. to put his country before himself and his fellow men. He is successful but there's no way I would like to be under the control of someone as manipulative as him!

Nana-chan: hi hi! Yes, this story is pretty angsty. Hoping for happiness ... ... urm well please read on! I won't want to leak anything out so close to the end and thanks so much for always leaving me comments and encouraging me to continue! I hope things are looking up for you!

Piglet: Wow ... ... thanks so much for your encouraging comments and thanks so much for always being so motivating! Loved reading your view point. Between, is this ending up to your expectations? Or did it fall flat?

Lian: Sorry for the long wait but thanks so much for leaving me a comment in spite of being so busy at home! I hope it's up to your expectations :)

Liliane: Thank you so much for giving me the opportunity to read your insight !!! I really enjoyed it and was most impressed by your ability to capture all the nuances that I thought were pretty subtle in this story. Quite frankly, your review made my day and I still go back to read it because I know that there's a person out there who has the same point of view about Rui and Tsukushi as me and has completely understood everything that I was trying to convey in this story. I especially loved your comment about Shizuka – it was so perceptive. In a few short sentences you have captured her entire personality in my story. Thank you again and I can only hope that someone will brighten up your day as much as you have, mine.

just a teen: There is no greater compliment than letting me know that my writing has actually been able to change the mind of a T&T fan to accept R&T !!! With regards to another fic. Urm ... ... I'm not too sure when I will start another. Things are looking pretty tight for the next few months (as I guess you can tell by this long wait). Thanks so much for your constant support and if you like you could leave me with an e-mail address so that I can contact you if another fic is up (between did you just want to be notified for HYD's fics?). My e-mail is stated on the author's detail's page. Thanks again for your kind comments!

sweetpeakit: Thank you so much for your kind and generous comments!!!! I hope you will like the ending and really apologise for this long wait.

Leia : Ooops! An enraged R&T fan? I'm so sorry !!! I know I go overboard some times with my sadistic nature. Sorry about that!

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Rui: Finally! I thought you were never going to show up ever again!

Sheen: *in a sickly sweet tone* Dare I hope that you have actually missed my presence, Rui dear?

Rui : *turning green and jumping as far from Sheen as possible* No way! And please don't "dear" me. *Shudders* I was feeling sorry for your readers who were waiting to learn more about my fate.

Sheen: *aside* I see that his arrogant nature has not changed. *aloud* Well, so this is your last appearance. So you have anything to say to your fans?

Rui: *softening* Well, just to thank them. Thank you!

Sheen: *dramatically* The emotionally constipated genius actually has a humane side!

Rui: *frowns* Why you little ... ...

Sheen: Save me someone! *runs away from a fuming Rui*

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Chapter 37 - Epilogue

*3 years later*

"Good afternoon, Rui! How are you today? It's really lovely weather outside, isn't it? Maybe we can take a walk on the grounds after you have had your lunch!" A slim girl in the garb of a nurse burst cheerily into the sparsely furnished room and set down her containers on the white table in the middle of the room. She bustled around, opening the windows wider and drawing back the white curtains to allow the warm breeze and sunlight to enter the room. She picked up the white plastic vase and left the room only to return moments later with the same vase filled with bright yellow sunflowers.

"Look Rui, aren't they beautiful? They add quite a dash of colour to your room, don't they?" The silent figure sitting huddled in the white armchair next to one of the windows slowly turned his head. Dull, emotionless dark eyes in a thin pale face framed by longish black hair flickered briefly in the direction of the cheerful voice before returning to the window. Undaunted by the disinterest shown, she placed the vase on the table and brushed her hands briskly. "There! Much better!" She proceeded to pull one of the two chairs from the table right next to the armchair before removing the lid of the thermo flask and carefully sitting herself down in the chair.

"See, I've brought your favourite chicken soup today!" She carefully blew on the soup and gently spoon-fed it to Rui like a child. "Do you like it?" Although his eyes were still fixed on some invisible object outside the window, he tilted his head slightly to intercept the next spoonful. The corners of her mouth curled up in an even wider smile. "I'll make it more often then! I'm so glad the cooking lessons are paying off." She continued to feed him the rest of the lunch she had prepared, continuing her cheerful monologue.

"Okay, let's go for a walk shall we?" He obediently stood up a little unsteadily and she took his arm, leading him to the beautiful grounds. "You know, Rui, I think Tsukasa is falling for Shigeru," she confided in him. "It's about time. Those two are really a pair! And you should see the chemistry sizzling in the air!" She continued updating him about the lives of their mutual friends. "And Shizuka's wedding plans have been finalized. She wasn't pleased that Bernard's parents wanted such a grand event but she gave in because she didn't want to make things difficult for Bernard. I'll be helping with reception!"

When they returned, she tucked him into bed, "it's time for your afternoon nap! I'll be back later, I have a few errands to run now!" She pressed a tender kiss to the pale forehead and watched his eyes close. Suppressing a sigh, she stood up and quietly left the room.

"Hey Tsukushi," a passing nurse greeted her with a smile. "Is it your off day today?"

"Yes. How are you, Joyce?" she returned the smile warmly. Joyce was one of the nurses taking care of Rui.

"He's really lucky to have you. The rest of the patients here hardly have any visitors, however, you visit him every other day and spend your free day of the week taking care of him! It does make our jobs a lot easier though!" Joyce joked. The entire staff body liked this bright and cheerful girl immensely and they had been extremely touched by her devotion to the silent occupant of room 311. A couple of the doctors and male nurses had even asked her out. However, each time she would refuse them politely but firmly. "So when are you transferring to here?" Tsukushi laughed. They were always teasing her for spending so much of her time in the nursing home. However, she could not bear to leave the sick kids in the pediatric hospital where she was currently working at.

"I've gotta run some errands, see you later." With a wave and another smile, she was gone.

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*A few months later*

It was almost midnight. Brisk footsteps could be heard walking down the corridor. They stopped in front of a door. There was silence and then a key was inserted in the keyhole and a soft click was heard before the key was withdrawn.

"Good luck, sir." A voice spoke softly and the speaker received a curt answering nod before the leader turned the doorknob softly and walked into the room. His eyes had adjusted to the darkness during the long trip down numerous dimly lit corridors and they quickly scanned the room, stopping at the slight figure huddled in the chair next to window. The slight stiffening of those shoulders would have been indiscernible to anyone but one who had been specially trained like him to take note of even the most minor details. He could literally feel the tension emanating from the man who was persisting in ignoring his presence.

"Hi Rui, it's been a quite while." He finally spoke in a conversational tone, his deep voice breaking the terse silence in the room. He strolled to the chair next to the silent figure and sat down. "Sorry I haven't been visiting regularly, you know how busy things get." His sharp eyes picked up a slight twitch in those unsmiling lips and continued his little speech with more confidence. "I know you've recovered much more than you've let on. Hell, you are kid who had adults all around you fooled for years with your autistic act. I can only imagine how better your skills must have gotten. But you're overdoing it now, Rui." His voice turned deadly serious in the familiar way that would sent chills down his agents' spines, "do you know how much pain and suffering you are causing your friends and family? And what about Tsukushi? Are you as selfish as to hold her back? Do you know what she has been going through?" He waited. Two seconds ... ... Five ... ... Seven ... ... Ten seconds ... ... Then he secretly crowed in triumph as the pale face turned towards him and a pair of dark emotionless eyes fixed on his face.

"What has she been going through?" The voice rasped out a little painfully, hoarse from years of disuse. "Tell me."

*Hours later*

"You actually got him to respond to you? Wait ... ... Wasn't he diagnosed to be still totally in his own world? He spoke for the first time since that incident? And not only that, he agreed? He actually agreed to your scheme?"

J looked at his third in command in mild disapproval, "I thought I'd trained you better than this."

"But sir, that's totally incredible."

He sighed, "there's nothing impossible in this world, and you should never underestimate anyone, especially Rui." However, there was a twinkle in his eyes. "He knows that he is acting selfishly and holding back all those who care for him. Also, I doubt that he wanted to live his life cooped up in that dreadful nursing home, staring out of the window and counting the minutes, hours, days, months and years to his eventual death ... ..."

"If you put it that way ... ..." His subordinate's voice trailed away.

"Okay, implement stage one."

"Right away."

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*Next Afternoon*

"Paging for Nurse Makino Tsukushi ... ... Nurse Makino Tsukushi ... ... please come to the reception now." Tsukushi smoothly slipped the clipboard back into its holder at the end of the patient's bed. With a smile and an assurance that she would be back soon, she left the room and quickly walked to the reception, wondering who was looking for her. Her eyes widened in surprise and then a bright smile lit up her face as she caught sight of four familiar faces.

"Yuki, Soujirou? How was Greece? I thought you were both coming back next week? And Akira, how was your business trip? It's lovely to see ... ..." Her cheerful voice faltered as she noticed the unnaturally grim expressions on all four faces. Upon careful scrutiny, she could see traces of ... ... pain ... ... or was it sadness? She felt the first tendrils of fear encasing her heart as her mouth went dry.

"Tsukushi." She found herself staring up into Tsukasa's eyes as his hands reached out and held both of her arms firmly, trying to anchor her ... ... trying to lessen the shock ... ... She saw the overwhelming sorrow in those pleading eyes ... ... And she knew.

"Tsukushi, you have to be brave." No! Her mind was screaming silently as her eyes remained transfixed on his. No! No! No!

"It's Rui ... ... he jumped from his window early this morning ... ..."

"No ... ..." Did that pathetic meow of a whimper come from her throat?

"He's ... ... dead ... ..." The world around her faded away as she found herself sinking into a dark abyss ... ... deeper and deeper ... ...

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"How is she doing?" Soujirou asked in a subdued tone for once as he looked at the pale, still figure that was Tsukushi lying on the hospital bed.

"What do you expect?" Tsukasa snapped as Akira placed a steadying on his shoulder.

"This is a shock to all of us." He intervened in a quiet tone. "Please calm down. We are both as upset as you are."

"How could this happen?" Tsukasa punched the wall in frustration as he closed his eyes, trying to keep his emotions under control.

"Mr Hanazawa has hired his own private investigation team to look into it. It does sound a bit dodgy especially given that the ... ... the ... ... face was not recognizable ... ..." Akira's voice faltered and the three of them paled as they recalled the mess of blood and tissue that was meant to be Rui's face. There had been a subsequent race to the bathroom before they lost it on the disinfected floor of the morgue.

"At least we know that they have conducted tests and the DNA matches."

"Why would he ... ..." Doubt and confusion were mirrored on all three faces.

"I didn't know that he had recovered enough to even feel depressed." Soujirou sighed as he kneaded the bridge of his nose. "Perhaps we haven't been around enough for him ... ..."

"Stop it! You certainly aren't helping things," growled Tsukasa. Just then, a slight movement caught his eye and he rushed to the bedside. The figure shifted and the long lashes fluttered. "Tsukushi, are you feeling better?" There was a dazed look in those eyes.

"Where ... ... How did I get here? What happened?" Then the eyes darkened in remembrance and her lips started quivering.

"Tsukushi ... ..." Tsukasa took a step towards her, only to be stopped by an outstretched arm as she covered her face with her other hand.

"Stop," the hoarse voice was almost unrecognizable as hers. "Pease leave me alone ... ..."

"Tsukushi ... ..." this time Soujirou tried.

"Please leave! Please ... ... Get Out! Get out ... ..." Her voice was shaking by now. With a sympathetic look in her direction, Akira grabbed Soujirou and Tsukasa and shoved them out of the room without saying a word. The moment the door was closed behind them, she broke down and collapsed into a heap on the bed, her frail body racking with the violent sobs that were torn from her throat ... ...

How could he be so cruel as to leave her behind? How could he? How could he? And why did he suddenly decide to leave her? Did he sudden come to his senses and the enormity of the past was too much for him to bear? Was her love not enough to keep him alive? Why, Rui? Why ... ... But these questions would never be answered ... ... For the first time, she really wanted to die ... ...

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*Two months later*

A soft rustling sound could be heard as a slight girlish figure wandered through the cemetery, terminating as she stopped in front of a newly constructed grave. She knelt down, lightly running loving fingers down the polished marble surface, oblivious to the two quick flashes of light in a tree overhead.

"Rui ... ..." her soft whisper was almost a sigh. "I miss you." Her eyes dimmed with tears as buried memories resurfaced. "I thought you might like some company on your first night here alone." A shadowy figure shrouded in darkness behind an enormous gravestone a few yards away stiffened at the sound of her voice and slowly straightened.

"Did you see everyone crying his or her heart out? Even Tsukasa and Akira were crying ... ..." A shaky giggle was heard. "Except for me. It was really hard to get them to leave me alone." She sighed. "Well, I hope Yuki will forgive me for drugging her tea tonight. I did make sure that there were no unpleasant side effects. But I had to come here and she would have stopped me ... ..." There was a long pause.

"They are right, you know, Rui? They were right to be suspicious ... ... I have no intention of leaving here tonight or ever again," she continued in a conversational tone as her eyes remained expressionless. The dark figure tensed. "I can't live without you," she stated calmly as her hands were preoccupied with something. "Did you know that you were the only thing that kept me going? Now, there's no reason for me to live anymore. Don't wander too far. The sooner I catch up with you the better," she whispered as she pressed a tender kiss against the engraved name. When she straightened, there was a filled syringe clutched in her right hand.

"Quite the modern Romeo and Juliet ending, isn't it? Except that heroin was probably not so popular then." She chuckled wryly as she held out her left arm, ready to inject the lethal dosage into a vein, and then screamed as her arm was caught in a strong grip. Pale, strong fingers encircled her wrist. For a split second she stared at them, paralysed by fear. However, her fears were replaced by a far stronger emotion a few moments later. Not quite daring to breathe, she barely acknowledged the hope burning through her veins as she turned stiffly, slowly lifting her eyes to the dark figure that was towering before her. Her vision was suddenly blurred by hot tears and her world teetered precariously as a soft gasp escaped from her lips, "Rui ... ..."

In the next moment, the syringe was wrenched from her nerveless fingers and strong arms encircled her waist, steadying her. She buried her face in his chest as she breathed in the scent that was so distinctly him. Her hands gripped his cloak so tightly that her knuckles turned white. Her face was wet with tears when she finally found the strength to lift her head and gaze into the pale and haggard, but still handsome dear face.

"How?" She managed to ask.

"Engineered by J." His voice was raspy.

"How could you!" She hit him with one hand as she clung onto him tightly with the other. "How could you let me think you were dead!"

"So foolish." He sighed as he held her more tightly. "I'm not worth it."

"So if I hadn't tried to kill myself, you'd have left me forever! How could you be so cruel?" His fingers gently brushed her tears away.

"It's for the best." He said quietly. "I'm a wreck. I'm no longer the man I used to be, and I will never be the same again." He stopped her when she tried to furiously deny what he knew was the truth. "J told me that I was causing grief to my family and friends. He then proposed the only alternative available to me. And I grabbed at it."

She looked at him inquiringly.

"A position of a professor with the organization. To teach others what I know." He answered her unspoken question. "However, to protect me, I needed to disappear."

"Take me with you," she said urgently.

"Sweetheart." Her heart clenched painfully as the familiar endearment that she had thought she would never ever hear again fell from his lips. "I don't want to destroy your life along with my own."

"What rubbish!" She was furious now.

"You will be giving up your entire life – your family and our mutual friends."

"As long as I can be with you."

"It will really be only me." He stared into her eyes, trying to stress the direness of the consequences of leaving with him.

"I don't care."

"No," he said with finality.

"Fine, then give me back my syringe and let me end things now. Or I'll try again until I succeed, when you aren't around to stop me." Her eyes flashed defiantly.

"You are not acting rationally," he tried to reason with her.

"There's no logic where love is concerned." She said softly. "To me the only choice is being alive with you, or waiting in afterlife for you to join me in death."

"You have always been stubborn." However, she sensed his capitulation as he lowered his face into her hair, his arms still encircling her protectively yet desperately.

"Stein?" They both jumped as another voice interrupted them. She turned to see another man standing in front of them.

"Will there be a problem if I take her along?" He gestured helplessly towards her.

"No sir. J had anticipated this situation. We'll simply proceed along plan B." Rui raised an eyebrow.

"Take both of you to the hideout and engineer her death." He explained.

"This is your last chance to change your mind," Rui said softly as he gently disengaged himself from Tsukushi and waited. Bright determined eyes met his.

"That is not an option," she said firmly as she grasped his outstretched hand tightly.

"No regrets?"

"None." His control finally broke and he descended upon her in one swoop. She closed her eyes, letting a stray tear trickle down her cheek as his arms wrapped around her slender form like bands of iron. Her hands slid around his neck and a moan escaped from her as his burning lips devoured hers passionately. She was leaning against him for support, her trembling legs no longer able to hold her, and he was breathing hard, shaking when they finally broke off the kiss, staring entranced into each other's eyes.

"Er hm ... ..." The sound of embarrassed coughing brought Rui to his senses and reminded him that they were not alone. "Er ... ... I think we should make a move." With a silent nod, Rui slid an arm under Tsukushi's knees and picked her up easily as if she weighted nothing.

"Rui, I can ... ..."

"Shush, let me carry you, love. You can't even stand." He had a point. With a sigh of surrender, she held onto him tightly and laid her head against his chest as he took the first steps towards a future that was suddenly starting to look very much brighter. Yes, they were going to have to live under false identities and were never going to see their families or friends again. They still needed time to recover from the traumatic past and to heal. However, they were finally reunited and that was enough to give them strength to face the trials ahead together ... ...