"What must I do?" Those were the first words out of his mouth when the priest settled himself behind the curtain.

"D… do?" The priest parroted, swallowing heavily.

"For forgiveness."

"For…!" He started to say something along the lines of 'Forgiveness? You?', but quickly reconsidered and stopped himself. The idea of a demon wanting forgiveness was just too ridiculous to pursue for long without his brain feeling like mush. "Well… well, you just… tell me what you've done wrong. And, and according to that, I'll tell you what you need to do for absolution." The priest considered adding that in this case, sacraments were completely unnecessary since even God couldn't be that forgiving, but the will for survival out ruled complete honesty.

"I've killed a lot of people. Does that count?"

The priest nearly choked on the disinterested way the demon spoke of killings. "You'll have to be more specific than that," he stammered out nervously, though he really didn't want to hear any of it.

"What, list everyone I've killed? They all seem to blend together after a while. I can't keep track of them all. Blood is blood. I mean, there's this one woman whom I could've sworn I'd already killed several times, but I keep seeing her around. But humans are all rather alike, so maybe not."

Even at such a serious time, the demon felt inner laughter bubbling up. It was really so fun scaring priests. He couldn't resist continuing, "But I do remember this other woman, she was really fat, who laughed a lot. She just kept on laughing. The more scared she got, the more she laughed. Though it was pretty nervous-sounding laughter. She was still laughing when I cut off her--"

The door opened behind the demon, and in one sudden motion, he was out of his seat, turned around, with one arm around the intruder's neck while the other hurriedly scrabbled for grip.

"Yes, lovely to see you too," the intruder said, voice slightly muffled by the demon's upper arm and elbow.

The demon paused, grip loosening slightly. "Bakura?" He looked down, affirmed that it was, indeed, who he thought it was, and let go. "That was fast."

"That's better," Bakura said, straightening up and stretching, cat-like. Then the easy comfort on his face was replaced by joking (?) annoyance. "Why the heck are you here, of all places? Do you have any idea how long it took me to find you?"

"How long?"

"Well, okay, only about ten minutes. But that's still a long time for me!"

The first demon shrugged. "I didn't expect you to come looking."

"So what are you doing here?" Bakura motioned to the curtain. "A priest?"

"I was at confession." The first demon twisted his lips into an expression of irritated regret. "Until you arrived, that is."

"Couldn't help myself. You know how it is. Besides, what makes you think it would've worked?"

"Why not?"

"Because you're you!" Bakura sighed, crossed his arms. "Self-proclaimed Yuugiou, had to take on the mysteriously undefeatable opponent?" A smirk began to form on his lips at Yuugiou's annoyed expression. "Impossible odds, limitless penalty for the loser? Boundless, ask-and-ye-shall-receive prize for the winner? …Won? Opponent turned out to be Death? Received the 'gift' of immortality? Any of this ringing a bell?"

"I never wanted it in the first place. He can't expect me to keep it forever."

"See, that's the funny thing, there!" (Expectantly, Yuugiou looked to the direction towards which Bakura was pointing, but saw nothing particularly droll.) "Everyone dies, so nothing can last forever. But he can expect you to keep your immortality forever… or at least as long as you've got it!"

"…Ah. Funny."

Bakura shook his head. "You know what your problem is? You have no appreciation for irony."

"I have many problems, and that, as far as I know, is not one of them. Now are you going to go away and let me continue this, or do you actually have a purpose for being here?"

"Oh yeah." Bakura tossed a newspaper at Yuugiou, who caught it with a flick of his wrist and a sharp smacking sound. "Malik and I are famous. Though nobody knows who we are, apparently." He snapped his fingers in an exaggerated show of concentration. "Page A9, A… 12, I think, and front page of the Local section. That's section C."

There was silence but for the rustling of the newspaper, then more silence, then more rustling as the newspaper hit to the floor. "What's the date? Today."

"The eleventh." Bakura glanced quickly at his watch. "But back in Japan, it's already the twelfth."

"Funeral? Today?"

Bakura nodded. "So the papers say."

"Then… then I should hurry."

"Give it up already, would you? You're not going to get un-undead-ified, so why don't you just accept it? Take care of Yuugi the way you took care of Malik and me. I'm sure you'll get used to it eventually."

"And look how you two turned out," Yuugiou snapped bitterly. "One kills an innocent child while the other knocks innocent bystanders unconscious."

"Hey, hey, calm down!" Bakura held up his hands disarmingly. "At least I was the one doing the knocking. You can't blame Yuugi's death on me. Well, you did, I think, because that knife you stuck through my stomach didn't look particularly friendly. But see, there was no logic there, because I was just the knocker, okay?"

"You were as much to blame as Malik was, because you distracted me from stopping him."

"And that's why you killed both of us and shoved us in body bags?"

"I shoved you in the closet. The police shoved you in body bags."

"And boy, that was not a pleasant experience, let me tell you. Though I bet now the police are wondering how a corpse just got up and walked away."

"Two?"

"No, Malik's staying put. Maybe you've killed him one too many times?"

"Immortality lasts forever, Bakura. It doesn't wear off. Though I'd gladly be killed any number of times, if only to prevent Yuugi from becoming one of us."

"That, my friend, was your fault."

"No, it wasn't."

"You bit him. Who can we blame, d'you think?"

"You—Well, your partner stabbed him through the chest! What was I supposed to do, just let him die?"

"But if you suddenly become a mortal, and this somehow changes Yuugi to a mortal as well, wouldn't he be just as dead?"

"Better than having to kill others for survival. That would break him."

"So you bit him anyways."

"I couldn't let him die!"

"But now you can."

"Bakura, would you just shut up? For a minute? Let me think?"

"There's nothing to think about, O King. Nothing you can do. Might as well welcome Yuugi when he wakes up."

"He won't wake up," Yuugiou muttered flatly, looking back at the curtain. "Not if I can help it."

"Then I've got a little piece of advice for you," Bakura said with a drawn-out sigh. "If you want to confess your sins and whatever, get a new priest. One with a head."

"That was your fault."

"What can I say? He had it coming."