[Author's note: Like "Miles to Go", this is an earlier fic. I wrote this one last fall as well, and it was, like all my other fics, originally posted to Usenet.
Still not light and fuzzy, (since the storyline it's based around was not light and fuzzy!) but not so dark as the others.
This one is basically the Nicole/Luka storyline, viewed through Luka's eyes ... with some minor changes along the way. (And a few major changes as well.) How *would* Luka have reacted to the news that he was to be a father?
I don't own ER. I don't own Luka Kovac (alas ...) or any of the other characters mentioned here. I do own this particular arrangement of words, so please do not do anything besides read/print it for your own enjoyment without my permission. But please DO review!]
------------------
The apartment was filled with the rich scent of braising meat and vegetables. Nicole stood at the stove, stirring something.
"I made us supper, Luka," she said, with an anxious smile. "It's been ready for a while. I expected you home a couple of hours ago ... I was starting to worry."
"I'm not really hungry." Luka hung up his damp coat. "I got a bite to eat at Doc Magoos." At Nicole's crestfallen expression he immediately regretted his words, and his too short, too brisk tone. "It smells wonderful, though. You go ahead and eat; you need to eat something. I'll have some later. I promise."
"No, I'm not really hungry either," Nicole said. "I made it mostly for you. I'm a little bit nauseous, morning sickness, maybe?" She managed a nervous smile. "Though, at this hour, I guess we should call it nighttime sickness?"
"Pregnancy can make you nauseous at any time of the day. You'll feel better if you eat a little something, though." Damn, why couldn't he make his voice sound concerned, instead of just -- professional? Nicole didn't miss it.
"You're angry."
"No, I'm not angry, Nicole. I just needed -- *need* some time. It was a shock, that's all. But it's not your fault. These things happen."
Nicole looked sideways at him as she put the pot away in the fridge, and cleared the dishes from the table. "I should have been more careful. It *is* my fault." She sniffled a little. "But, you don't have to worry about me, Luka. I'll be ok. I've been on my own for so long; I'm good at it. I'll manage." She wiped her eyes on the back of her sleeve.
"Stop it!" snapped Luka. "Just stop it!" Then he hesitated. "Were you going to ... have the baby?" What answer did he expect to hear? What answer did he want?
Nicole looked surprised. "Yes, of course! Didn't you want me to? I mean ... if you want me to have an abortion ... I guess I could ...." her voice caught and she wiped her eyes again.
"Nicole, I said stop it! Why did you think I would want that? Of course I don't want that." And he realized that he meant it.
You just don't seem very happy about it. We haven't been together very long. We never talked about children. I don't even know if you like children, or want them, or..."
"That's enough!" Luka came around the table put his hands on Nicole's shoulders and looked into her reddened eyes. "We're not going to talk about this any more tonight. You're tired and stressed, and we both had long, rough days. I'm off tomorrow. We can eat that wonderful smelling supper, and have a long talk.We'll decide together what to do." He kissed her forehead gently. "Now go to bed."
"Ok," Nicole agreed wearily. She started for the bedroom, then turned. "Are you coming?"
"I'll be along soon."
------
Luka poured himself a drink and turned on the tv. But he didn't drink the wine, and he hardly saw what was on the tube -- the late news show ... something about an ambulance accident and an emergency c-section!
How had this happened? They had been careful, hadn't they? The first night that Nicole had crawled into his bed, after spending two nights on the sofa, she'd told him that he didn't need to worry about using protection. "I'm on the pill," she'd told him. "Not that I've been -- doing anything -- I haven't been with anyone for a couple of years ... but my doctor put me on them when I was a teenager since I'm pretty irregular, and have such bad cramps." He'd insisted on condoms the first couple of times anyway, 'just to be safe,' he'd said ... but she'd complained, she'd cried. She didn't like the way they felt; didn't he trust her? "If you don't trust me, we shouldn't be doing this. I wouldn't sleep with a person *I* didn't trust..." And so, the condoms had stayed in the drawer.
And he *did* trust her. He'd seen the pills in the bathroom. Of course she was taking them. Nothing was perfect ... sometimes these things happened. And, maybe, sometime things happened for a reason.
TO BE CONTINUED...
Still not light and fuzzy, (since the storyline it's based around was not light and fuzzy!) but not so dark as the others.
This one is basically the Nicole/Luka storyline, viewed through Luka's eyes ... with some minor changes along the way. (And a few major changes as well.) How *would* Luka have reacted to the news that he was to be a father?
I don't own ER. I don't own Luka Kovac (alas ...) or any of the other characters mentioned here. I do own this particular arrangement of words, so please do not do anything besides read/print it for your own enjoyment without my permission. But please DO review!]
------------------
The apartment was filled with the rich scent of braising meat and vegetables. Nicole stood at the stove, stirring something.
"I made us supper, Luka," she said, with an anxious smile. "It's been ready for a while. I expected you home a couple of hours ago ... I was starting to worry."
"I'm not really hungry." Luka hung up his damp coat. "I got a bite to eat at Doc Magoos." At Nicole's crestfallen expression he immediately regretted his words, and his too short, too brisk tone. "It smells wonderful, though. You go ahead and eat; you need to eat something. I'll have some later. I promise."
"No, I'm not really hungry either," Nicole said. "I made it mostly for you. I'm a little bit nauseous, morning sickness, maybe?" She managed a nervous smile. "Though, at this hour, I guess we should call it nighttime sickness?"
"Pregnancy can make you nauseous at any time of the day. You'll feel better if you eat a little something, though." Damn, why couldn't he make his voice sound concerned, instead of just -- professional? Nicole didn't miss it.
"You're angry."
"No, I'm not angry, Nicole. I just needed -- *need* some time. It was a shock, that's all. But it's not your fault. These things happen."
Nicole looked sideways at him as she put the pot away in the fridge, and cleared the dishes from the table. "I should have been more careful. It *is* my fault." She sniffled a little. "But, you don't have to worry about me, Luka. I'll be ok. I've been on my own for so long; I'm good at it. I'll manage." She wiped her eyes on the back of her sleeve.
"Stop it!" snapped Luka. "Just stop it!" Then he hesitated. "Were you going to ... have the baby?" What answer did he expect to hear? What answer did he want?
Nicole looked surprised. "Yes, of course! Didn't you want me to? I mean ... if you want me to have an abortion ... I guess I could ...." her voice caught and she wiped her eyes again.
"Nicole, I said stop it! Why did you think I would want that? Of course I don't want that." And he realized that he meant it.
You just don't seem very happy about it. We haven't been together very long. We never talked about children. I don't even know if you like children, or want them, or..."
"That's enough!" Luka came around the table put his hands on Nicole's shoulders and looked into her reddened eyes. "We're not going to talk about this any more tonight. You're tired and stressed, and we both had long, rough days. I'm off tomorrow. We can eat that wonderful smelling supper, and have a long talk.We'll decide together what to do." He kissed her forehead gently. "Now go to bed."
"Ok," Nicole agreed wearily. She started for the bedroom, then turned. "Are you coming?"
"I'll be along soon."
------
Luka poured himself a drink and turned on the tv. But he didn't drink the wine, and he hardly saw what was on the tube -- the late news show ... something about an ambulance accident and an emergency c-section!
How had this happened? They had been careful, hadn't they? The first night that Nicole had crawled into his bed, after spending two nights on the sofa, she'd told him that he didn't need to worry about using protection. "I'm on the pill," she'd told him. "Not that I've been -- doing anything -- I haven't been with anyone for a couple of years ... but my doctor put me on them when I was a teenager since I'm pretty irregular, and have such bad cramps." He'd insisted on condoms the first couple of times anyway, 'just to be safe,' he'd said ... but she'd complained, she'd cried. She didn't like the way they felt; didn't he trust her? "If you don't trust me, we shouldn't be doing this. I wouldn't sleep with a person *I* didn't trust..." And so, the condoms had stayed in the drawer.
And he *did* trust her. He'd seen the pills in the bathroom. Of course she was taking them. Nothing was perfect ... sometimes these things happened. And, maybe, sometime things happened for a reason.
TO BE CONTINUED...