SPECIAL CIRCUMSTANCES
The next morning Amber woke up early.
The anticipation to finally break free was shaking every nerve in her body. All the patience she had was swept away by jutting anxiety. She needed those papers; she wanted them then and there. She had always been tied to Bray. Always. Even when she had been Eagle for that brief period of time, she was still his.
She resented that so much, that no one could ever possibly understand how much she had come to loathe it. To loathe her past, and to loathe herself for getting entangled with such a man.
But now a new era was about to begin-- one where Amber would not be defined by a man, and if she decided to take one up, he would not be defined by her. She was ready to start again and to make something of what she had been in order for her son to have the future that would give him the best quality of life.
Thinking these thoughts, Amber threw back the covers of the bed and changed into a black tanktop and jeans. She fixed herself a cup of tea in the cheerfully painted blue kitchen and leaned over the counter, looking out the window over the sink at the busy lives occuring below on the street.
Cars zoomed past, though far fewer than pre-Virus times. Bicycles intermixed with cars. People walked on the old, trodden sidewalks to their homes or to their jobs or held a child's hand securely as they made their way to a daycare or to one of the bus stops set up to transport kids to schools.
Across the street from the apartment was a bookshop, and next to that was a vegetable stand, and than a dress boutique. The City had become quite the self-efficient machine. People had finally grown up, and Amber was proud of that. She knew it had been bound to happen.
The night before, after dinner, and after BJ and Brady were sleeping, Amber and Trudy watched THE TRUTH ABOUT CATS & DOGS, one of Amber's favorite old movies with Uma Thurman. When it was over, the women sat at the table and drank hot tea. Amber's mood had been lifted by the humor of the movie; she was feeling calm, and good about things. Content. Hopeful.
Over the tea, she told Trudy about what Lex had said.
"Lex has certainly changed," Trudy lifted her mug to her lips. "Started when Tai-San left him the month before your wedding, if I recall right."
"Trudy, I was just so surprised. He used to be such an a.sshole. Maybe the seperation made him realize his ways? It's so strange to think they were ever together!" Amber tried to convey her complete astonishment to her friend of the transformation.
"Same with Siva. We've gotten close the past few years, and she's such a good person. It's so odd to imagine that the two used to be so serious. But she couldn't put up with his sh.it either, and than Tai-San took him back, and the rest is history...but it seems your quite taken with him," Trudy giggled.
"The dramatic history of our lives," Amber said dramatically. "Well, he has gotten really attractive. There was a really awkward moment, though-- we stared at eachother."
That odd moment had been bugging her all day. She wanted to call Trudy at work right after it had happend, but refrained from doing so after all of the things Trudy had sacrificed for her. She didn't need to sacrifice hours where she made money too.
And when she got home they ate dinner, and than they had played old board games with the kids, and than watched the movie. To tell her was expectation: to see what Trudy thought.
"You stared at eachother?" Trudy arched an eyebrow.
Amber twiddled her thumbs, setting down her mug, and noticing the Drawing Rag spot she had tried to remove when Lex had visited. Still there. She slid the mug to cover it.
"I take that as a yes, then. Well, you both probably see how much each of you guys have changed, were surprised, and a moment got caught in the confusion?" Trudy folded her arms and sat back in the chair. She was wearing a pair of Albertson's red pajama pants and a gray t-shirt, her hair flowing to her shoulders.
"I hope so. Trudy, I'm going through so much...If something develops with Lex..." Amber trailed off. She bit her lip, a futile attempt at suppressing any possible connection with someone she used to think was as intelligent as a broomstick.
"Amber, honey, you're jumping to conclusions. Give yourself time to get through the hell you've been through; I think you're just confused," Trudy got up and emptied her tea in the sink. Amber followed suit.
"It's really impressive Lex is going to try to get you divorce papers though. I've heard about Special Circumstances, and they're hard to get," Trudy mentioned, hand on hip. Amber's heart sank. She turned on the faucet and washed her mug out. The hot tea sizzled down the sink.
What if her future sizzled down the sink too? What if she didn't get the papers? A panic seemed to overtake her.
"But I'm sure Patch will give them to you without a second thought," Trudy added quickly, recognizing the look on Amber's face.
Amber smiled meekly, brushing it off, and the two said goodnight.
Dressed in an indentical pair of Trudy's pajama pants and a black t-shirt, Amber dragged herself to the bathroom in the hallway between the spare bedroom, Brady's room, and where she and BJ were staying, the guest room.
She slipped into her room to grab her toothbrush and some face wash Trudy got her from Albertson's. It seemed all of her newly acquired possessions were from the department store. She didn't care-- they were quality, and she hadn't had much anything of quality since before the Virus. And they were free.
As she washed her face with a cloth she had squirted a small patch of the green facewash in, Amber thought about not getting the Special Circumstance papers.
What was the worst that could happen? She thought. Maybe she could secretly work at Albertson's in a backroom, and Brady could teach BJ what she'd learned at school. And she could live with Trudy and clean her house for rent, and keep her company.
No. That wouldn't work, Amber thought as she tried to scrub the stubborn mascara off her eyelashes. She didn't want to work in a backroom, it would be a burden for Brady to have to have the responsibility of teaching BJ, and Trudy had even told her she wanted to date in the future, possibly get married. Amber didn't blame her-- she wanted a life too, and wouldn't be completely thrilled to have her abused best friend living with her forever.
She had to get those papers.
When she was done cleaning up, she looked in the mirror for a moment, studying her reflection.
Her build was the same as it had been since her teen years, except a bit more defined and filled out. She was lean, and had soft pink skin that wasn't tanned nor completely white. Her hair fell to her shoulders, the ends tipped slightly with the old bleach blonde that was so stuck it wouldn't come out no matter how many times she had tried to dye it. And her lips were like two small mountains that made themselves very clear on her face, her nose was strong like a dependable bridge, and her eyes-- her eyes seemed to hold her entire story within them.
She leaned over to look closer at them. A terrible sadness was lost there. But also a drive and a strength. Clearly two paths she could take: be weak or, like the City had rebuilt itself, rebuild herself.
Despite her circumstances, she would rebuild herself.
Suddenly a yawn caught her, interrupting her study. She took that as a sign to retire, and with one last glance in the mirror, she turned off the light and slipped into the guest bedroom.
BJ was sleeping on a bunch of pillows on the floor. He looked so safe, especially under the moonlight that managed to find cracks through the drapes. Amber kissed BJ goodnight. He stirred slightly as she tiptoed to the bed, and pulled the covers back.
With a yawn, Amber fell asleep.
She was surprised she had slept so well. She had thought she was in for a restless night of tossing and turning, but she slept like she was dead. She didn't even dream.
And now, as she watched the outside world below the street, tea in hand, she heard the distinct sound of children waking up. Grinning, she drank the remainder of her tea and fixed toast and orange juice for the tousled hair kids who had wandered into the living room like zombies.
"Come to the table, I made you guys breakfast," Amber said.
BJ was lieing on the couch as Brady turned on the television for the Children's Block. Today it looked like THE LITTLE MERMAID. BJ and Brady made their groggy way to the table, and positioned their chairs toward to the television as Amber nibbled on a piece of toast. Suddenly a thought struck her-- the Children's Block came on at 10:00 every morning. So she had slept in!
That meant in two hours Lex would come. He had said at lunch, and he even said that meant noon! Amber's heart started to thump anxiously once more. She drummed her fingers on the tables surface and finished the remainder of her toast in a frenzy. Wait, she thought as she emptied the dishes in the sink and loaded them into the dishwasher. Should I hop in the shower now? Yes! No! Yes?
"God dammit," Amber said, frusterated. In the end, she decided to watch a bit of THE LITTLE MERMAID with the kids until 10:30 when she'd hop in the shower. A perfect plan. That way BJ and Brady would be preoccupied enough by the movie to do anything hazardous and she could get ready, maybe even see what different ways her hair looked best. Yes, that would be it...
Then it hit her. Why was she so excited about getting ready? For the Special Circumstance papers?
No... for that something else...
Lex, Amber whispered in the deepest corners of her mind. Her heart sank as the excitement died. The little schedule she had planned out faded. She would not get ready for Lex! No, that was stupid. She would get in the shower at eleven, an hour before he came so she would look decent. She got ready every day! Just because she knew he was coming didn't mean she couldn't that particular day, did it?
"Good God," Amber muttered as she finally decided to take the shower and get ready after watching a bit of the movie with the kids. She liked to feel her best. What was wrong with that? As the children were immersed in the tale of the mermaid princess, Amber hopped in the shower. The kids would be fine; Bray didn't know she was with Trudy, so there was no chance of him suddenly storming into the apartment and killing her.
She shuddered at that thought as she lathered herself with soap that boasted to be made from "natural ingredients found in the splendors of nature" on the label. It smelt good; not too strong, and not too feeble. Just right. It was a grainy substance, so the harder she scrubbed the more it felt like the little sand-like pebbles were scratching the dirt from her pours. It made her feel clean, and she liked to be clean.
When she was done lathering her skin, she pumped a large purple glass bottle for a shampoo that smelled like rain. She slathered the blue slime into her hair, and massaged her skull to perfection. Again, feeling the cleanliness soak into her soul and rise upward.
Amber guessed she like to be clean so much because Bray always left her bloody and battered. The memories of waking up in different rooms around the house, bruised and dazed, were not fond ones. She had to scrub so hard to get the blood out of her hair. And the sting the hot water made on the more painful wounds was incredibly hurtful.
"Now you don't wake up in random places, and you never have to worry about how to get blood out of your hair again," Amber laughed darkly, the water trickling down her lips, and splashing onto her tongue. She savored these moments for what they were. For how rare they had been not too long before. Now they were hers!
She laughed hard. So hard, because now she was in control. Why hadn't she realized such before? Special Circumstance papers or not, she would go on. Amber would rebuild herself the life she always dreamed of, and no one, not even Bray, could stop her. And no one, she thought bitterly, would EVER take BJ from her EVER.
Amber made a promise to herself: she would protect her life, and her child. No man was going to keep her away from her destiny, or hurt BJ. Bray? That son of b[B]i[/B]+_ch could rot in hell. He would never touch her-- never would he be a part of her or BJ's life again. As far as Amber was concerned, he had hurt them and that was enough to think of him as as good as dead.
She was going to make it.
Suddenly full of this new promise and bright with determination, Amber turned off the shower and got out.
Bathing was the ritual of her life. It was the most perfect routine that always calmed her down, and that made her feel pretty. She savored the delicious moments of soaking her skin in natural perfumes and, as Tai-San would say, letting the negative energy drain from her. She would lavishly shampoo her hair like she was a queen, and towel herself dry with only the most dry and fluffiest of towels.
Then she would make her way to the guest bedroom, and wipe herself down in lotion that moisturized every inch of her body that needed be. After she would get dressed, pick out a few rings or a necklace, and go back into the bathroom to do her hair.
As she looked into the mirror, her hair a lumpy mess, she noticed the television was off in the living room. She cocked her head out the door.
"BJ? Brady?"
No answer. Fear made a vein in her forehead throb violently. She felt the beautiful serenity the shower had given her die, just like her excitement about getting ready when she realized it really was for Lex. Gulping, she took the hot curling iron as a makeshift weapon for a just-in-case scenario and slowly stepped out of the bathroom, sweat popping up on her forehead.
"Gotcha Amber," A voice said.
Amber threw herself around to see Bray standing by the door, holding BJ and Brady by their mouths so they couldn't scream. Tears streamed down both their scared faces.
Her eyes wide in fear, Amber backed into the living room, the curling iron still in her hand.
"Bray," She gulped.
"It's me, b[b]i[/b]+ch," Bray sneered flatly. He glared at her, his eyes full of a hate she had never seen him wear before. He looked especially terrible. He hadn't shaved for what seemed like the entire duration of her stay at Trudy's, and he was wearing a white tanktop and black jeans that looked like they had been on him for days due to the large amount of stains upon them. Amber could smell the alcohol across the room.
"What do you want?" Amber moved in a pouncing pose slowly around the room as he did the same. They were like the hands of a clock, moving slowly around the width of the living area. But unlike a normal clock, the hands they represented were far apart.
"I want you and BJ back," Bray spat. BJ made a muffled cry for help.
Amber, despite her urge to scream and fall into a nervous wreck, stayed strong. The promise she had made to herself would not die when it was needed most.
"You can't have us back, Bray," Amber said powerfully. Bray glared, almost not recognziing her defying his authority.
"I said I-"
"You said a lot of things, Bray," Amber cut him off. The curling iron had pulled from the outlet in the bathroom, the cord dragging around the floor, but it was still hot enough to inflict damage.
"Better keep your little mouth shut," Bray shouted. He held BJ and Brady closer to him. They were trembling, trying to pull his hands from their faces.
"Bray this has nothing to do with the kids. Please, we can talk if you just let them go," Amber pleaded. Her voice was strong, full of the girl she had once been. Bray hated her now because he had recognized the return more than he ever had.
"I told you to keep your mouth shut!" He roared, his voice echoing off the walls.
Amber took a deep breath. "The old Bray wouldn't of done this."
Bray's face turned into shock. Instead of replying, he stared at her with a deathly gaze. She knew if he got to her she was dead.
"The old Bray is gone," Bray shot back angrily.
Amber kept moving sideways. Bray kept moving toward her way. He was eyeing the curling iron like it was a pathetic toy doll.
"Put the f.ucking curling iron down, Amber, and than I'll let the kids go," Bray said. He loosened the grip on BJ and Brady. They both inhaled deeply behind his looser hands. Their cries were more prevailent now they weren't stiffled.
"You have to promise me that Bray. Can you?"
"Put the curling iron down and the kids go free. I don't want to hurt them."
Amber set the curling iron down gently on the couch behind her. Before she could think a thought, Bray threw BJ and Brady hard behind him and ran to Amber. He gripped her wrists so tight the circulation was cut off, and he slammed her against the wall by the door.
"Bray, you said-"
"I say a lot of things, don't I?"
"Bray please!"
"You told all of our friends. You're dead, Amber. You're dead!"
Bray moved both of Amber's hands to one of his and reached into his pockets to withdraw a gun. Amber screamed.
"Brady, BJ, go into Trudy's room!"
"You shut the hell up!" Bray pointed the gun to the side of her head.
Amber screamed again. She hated him! She hated all he had done, and now she was helpless in his power. Damn him! Damn him! Tears smeared her face, snot dripped from her nose.
She screamed and screamed and screamed, and still he would not shoot her. She kicked her legs at him, even hitting him in the crotch but he wouldn't stop. The gun was pressed tightly into the side of her head. The round circle that could disperse her death forming a little dent in her skin.
"You coward! Shoot me!" Amber spit into his face.
He stared at her, trembling in his rage. He wiped the spit off and slapped her.
Bray beat the gun three times against the side of her head. A pain so strong hit every part of her body, though oddly enough her head didn't hurt she was in such shock. She could feel blood pouring past from the broken skin. She was falling into darkness...
The last things Amber heard and saw as she fell unconcious was Lex throwing the door open, Bray being smashed into the entrance wall, and the bullet meant for Amber sending bits of Trudy's apartment spraying into the afternoon sunlight.
The Special Circumstance papers Lex had brought with him?
They rifted from his hand and landed in a forming pool of Amber's blood.
~*~
When she woke up, Amber was in a bed at Tai-San's clinic. She suddenly broke from a dazed confusement to remember what had happend. She sat up quickly, no pain from the head wound hurting her.
"Your up!" Tai-San barged through a wooden door, dressed in her white coat, smiling.
"Tai-San! Bray came to the apartment, and Lex saved me-"
"Shhh," Tai-San pushed Amber down and sat next to her. "We know. That was four weeks ago, Amber."
"I've been here for a month!?" Amber cried in outrage.
"Yes. I kept you on heavy sedatives so you were sleeping for the entire healing process. You've been through too much trauma for your body to take, so I thought your mind could use a little break," Tai-San said.
Amber reached to the side of her head and felt a tiny bump. A tiny jolt of pain traced her nerves when she touched it, but other than that it was fine. That's why it's not hurting, she thought. It was healed.
She was grateful she hadn't been awake to feel that pain the wound would have sustained. Tai-San always had been a good healer.
"Where's Bray? How is Lex?" She suddenly cried.
"Bray has a hearing schueduled for next week with the Civil Court, but Lex wasn't hurt," Tai-San explained.
"Thank God. If..if he hadn't shown up, I would be dead," Amber whispered, Bray's hearing slipping from her mind. What she cared about was Lex.
"But he did. And he has a surprise for you," Tai-San said gently. She always talked about Lex with a goodness in her eye. She held no hard feelings against him. Their romance just hadn't been the right thing for either one of them. She had her memories, and for Tai-San that was enough.
"Lex is here?"
"Yes. He's come to see you every night since you've been here."
Amber said nothing, as Tai-San looked at her like she knew something Amber didn't and called Lex in.
Tai-San gave Lex the same look as he walked in and she out. He was wearing the hat, the jacket, and khaki slacks. They looked awfully businesslike and grownup for Lex. She smiled.
He rushed to her bedside.
"Amber," He whispered. He sat down on the stool, and brushed the hair from her face.
"Lex...I-"
"You don't have to say anything," Lex said.
"Why did you come? It wasn't noon yet..."
"Patch granted you everything right after I told him," Lex grinned widely.
"Oh my God...I'm...I-"
"You're divorced," Lex said under his breath while looking deeply into her eyes.
He bent down into the bed, and they kissed.
~*~
Readers,
Getting into the Ambex here kids! I hope you enjoy this part, as the story is starting to roll from here. I love you all, and appreciate all of the support you give me to continue writing not only this, but for future fics.
Hugs for all of you,
~h2o
The next morning Amber woke up early.
The anticipation to finally break free was shaking every nerve in her body. All the patience she had was swept away by jutting anxiety. She needed those papers; she wanted them then and there. She had always been tied to Bray. Always. Even when she had been Eagle for that brief period of time, she was still his.
She resented that so much, that no one could ever possibly understand how much she had come to loathe it. To loathe her past, and to loathe herself for getting entangled with such a man.
But now a new era was about to begin-- one where Amber would not be defined by a man, and if she decided to take one up, he would not be defined by her. She was ready to start again and to make something of what she had been in order for her son to have the future that would give him the best quality of life.
Thinking these thoughts, Amber threw back the covers of the bed and changed into a black tanktop and jeans. She fixed herself a cup of tea in the cheerfully painted blue kitchen and leaned over the counter, looking out the window over the sink at the busy lives occuring below on the street.
Cars zoomed past, though far fewer than pre-Virus times. Bicycles intermixed with cars. People walked on the old, trodden sidewalks to their homes or to their jobs or held a child's hand securely as they made their way to a daycare or to one of the bus stops set up to transport kids to schools.
Across the street from the apartment was a bookshop, and next to that was a vegetable stand, and than a dress boutique. The City had become quite the self-efficient machine. People had finally grown up, and Amber was proud of that. She knew it had been bound to happen.
The night before, after dinner, and after BJ and Brady were sleeping, Amber and Trudy watched THE TRUTH ABOUT CATS & DOGS, one of Amber's favorite old movies with Uma Thurman. When it was over, the women sat at the table and drank hot tea. Amber's mood had been lifted by the humor of the movie; she was feeling calm, and good about things. Content. Hopeful.
Over the tea, she told Trudy about what Lex had said.
"Lex has certainly changed," Trudy lifted her mug to her lips. "Started when Tai-San left him the month before your wedding, if I recall right."
"Trudy, I was just so surprised. He used to be such an a.sshole. Maybe the seperation made him realize his ways? It's so strange to think they were ever together!" Amber tried to convey her complete astonishment to her friend of the transformation.
"Same with Siva. We've gotten close the past few years, and she's such a good person. It's so odd to imagine that the two used to be so serious. But she couldn't put up with his sh.it either, and than Tai-San took him back, and the rest is history...but it seems your quite taken with him," Trudy giggled.
"The dramatic history of our lives," Amber said dramatically. "Well, he has gotten really attractive. There was a really awkward moment, though-- we stared at eachother."
That odd moment had been bugging her all day. She wanted to call Trudy at work right after it had happend, but refrained from doing so after all of the things Trudy had sacrificed for her. She didn't need to sacrifice hours where she made money too.
And when she got home they ate dinner, and than they had played old board games with the kids, and than watched the movie. To tell her was expectation: to see what Trudy thought.
"You stared at eachother?" Trudy arched an eyebrow.
Amber twiddled her thumbs, setting down her mug, and noticing the Drawing Rag spot she had tried to remove when Lex had visited. Still there. She slid the mug to cover it.
"I take that as a yes, then. Well, you both probably see how much each of you guys have changed, were surprised, and a moment got caught in the confusion?" Trudy folded her arms and sat back in the chair. She was wearing a pair of Albertson's red pajama pants and a gray t-shirt, her hair flowing to her shoulders.
"I hope so. Trudy, I'm going through so much...If something develops with Lex..." Amber trailed off. She bit her lip, a futile attempt at suppressing any possible connection with someone she used to think was as intelligent as a broomstick.
"Amber, honey, you're jumping to conclusions. Give yourself time to get through the hell you've been through; I think you're just confused," Trudy got up and emptied her tea in the sink. Amber followed suit.
"It's really impressive Lex is going to try to get you divorce papers though. I've heard about Special Circumstances, and they're hard to get," Trudy mentioned, hand on hip. Amber's heart sank. She turned on the faucet and washed her mug out. The hot tea sizzled down the sink.
What if her future sizzled down the sink too? What if she didn't get the papers? A panic seemed to overtake her.
"But I'm sure Patch will give them to you without a second thought," Trudy added quickly, recognizing the look on Amber's face.
Amber smiled meekly, brushing it off, and the two said goodnight.
Dressed in an indentical pair of Trudy's pajama pants and a black t-shirt, Amber dragged herself to the bathroom in the hallway between the spare bedroom, Brady's room, and where she and BJ were staying, the guest room.
She slipped into her room to grab her toothbrush and some face wash Trudy got her from Albertson's. It seemed all of her newly acquired possessions were from the department store. She didn't care-- they were quality, and she hadn't had much anything of quality since before the Virus. And they were free.
As she washed her face with a cloth she had squirted a small patch of the green facewash in, Amber thought about not getting the Special Circumstance papers.
What was the worst that could happen? She thought. Maybe she could secretly work at Albertson's in a backroom, and Brady could teach BJ what she'd learned at school. And she could live with Trudy and clean her house for rent, and keep her company.
No. That wouldn't work, Amber thought as she tried to scrub the stubborn mascara off her eyelashes. She didn't want to work in a backroom, it would be a burden for Brady to have to have the responsibility of teaching BJ, and Trudy had even told her she wanted to date in the future, possibly get married. Amber didn't blame her-- she wanted a life too, and wouldn't be completely thrilled to have her abused best friend living with her forever.
She had to get those papers.
When she was done cleaning up, she looked in the mirror for a moment, studying her reflection.
Her build was the same as it had been since her teen years, except a bit more defined and filled out. She was lean, and had soft pink skin that wasn't tanned nor completely white. Her hair fell to her shoulders, the ends tipped slightly with the old bleach blonde that was so stuck it wouldn't come out no matter how many times she had tried to dye it. And her lips were like two small mountains that made themselves very clear on her face, her nose was strong like a dependable bridge, and her eyes-- her eyes seemed to hold her entire story within them.
She leaned over to look closer at them. A terrible sadness was lost there. But also a drive and a strength. Clearly two paths she could take: be weak or, like the City had rebuilt itself, rebuild herself.
Despite her circumstances, she would rebuild herself.
Suddenly a yawn caught her, interrupting her study. She took that as a sign to retire, and with one last glance in the mirror, she turned off the light and slipped into the guest bedroom.
BJ was sleeping on a bunch of pillows on the floor. He looked so safe, especially under the moonlight that managed to find cracks through the drapes. Amber kissed BJ goodnight. He stirred slightly as she tiptoed to the bed, and pulled the covers back.
With a yawn, Amber fell asleep.
She was surprised she had slept so well. She had thought she was in for a restless night of tossing and turning, but she slept like she was dead. She didn't even dream.
And now, as she watched the outside world below the street, tea in hand, she heard the distinct sound of children waking up. Grinning, she drank the remainder of her tea and fixed toast and orange juice for the tousled hair kids who had wandered into the living room like zombies.
"Come to the table, I made you guys breakfast," Amber said.
BJ was lieing on the couch as Brady turned on the television for the Children's Block. Today it looked like THE LITTLE MERMAID. BJ and Brady made their groggy way to the table, and positioned their chairs toward to the television as Amber nibbled on a piece of toast. Suddenly a thought struck her-- the Children's Block came on at 10:00 every morning. So she had slept in!
That meant in two hours Lex would come. He had said at lunch, and he even said that meant noon! Amber's heart started to thump anxiously once more. She drummed her fingers on the tables surface and finished the remainder of her toast in a frenzy. Wait, she thought as she emptied the dishes in the sink and loaded them into the dishwasher. Should I hop in the shower now? Yes! No! Yes?
"God dammit," Amber said, frusterated. In the end, she decided to watch a bit of THE LITTLE MERMAID with the kids until 10:30 when she'd hop in the shower. A perfect plan. That way BJ and Brady would be preoccupied enough by the movie to do anything hazardous and she could get ready, maybe even see what different ways her hair looked best. Yes, that would be it...
Then it hit her. Why was she so excited about getting ready? For the Special Circumstance papers?
No... for that something else...
Lex, Amber whispered in the deepest corners of her mind. Her heart sank as the excitement died. The little schedule she had planned out faded. She would not get ready for Lex! No, that was stupid. She would get in the shower at eleven, an hour before he came so she would look decent. She got ready every day! Just because she knew he was coming didn't mean she couldn't that particular day, did it?
"Good God," Amber muttered as she finally decided to take the shower and get ready after watching a bit of the movie with the kids. She liked to feel her best. What was wrong with that? As the children were immersed in the tale of the mermaid princess, Amber hopped in the shower. The kids would be fine; Bray didn't know she was with Trudy, so there was no chance of him suddenly storming into the apartment and killing her.
She shuddered at that thought as she lathered herself with soap that boasted to be made from "natural ingredients found in the splendors of nature" on the label. It smelt good; not too strong, and not too feeble. Just right. It was a grainy substance, so the harder she scrubbed the more it felt like the little sand-like pebbles were scratching the dirt from her pours. It made her feel clean, and she liked to be clean.
When she was done lathering her skin, she pumped a large purple glass bottle for a shampoo that smelled like rain. She slathered the blue slime into her hair, and massaged her skull to perfection. Again, feeling the cleanliness soak into her soul and rise upward.
Amber guessed she like to be clean so much because Bray always left her bloody and battered. The memories of waking up in different rooms around the house, bruised and dazed, were not fond ones. She had to scrub so hard to get the blood out of her hair. And the sting the hot water made on the more painful wounds was incredibly hurtful.
"Now you don't wake up in random places, and you never have to worry about how to get blood out of your hair again," Amber laughed darkly, the water trickling down her lips, and splashing onto her tongue. She savored these moments for what they were. For how rare they had been not too long before. Now they were hers!
She laughed hard. So hard, because now she was in control. Why hadn't she realized such before? Special Circumstance papers or not, she would go on. Amber would rebuild herself the life she always dreamed of, and no one, not even Bray, could stop her. And no one, she thought bitterly, would EVER take BJ from her EVER.
Amber made a promise to herself: she would protect her life, and her child. No man was going to keep her away from her destiny, or hurt BJ. Bray? That son of b[B]i[/B]+_ch could rot in hell. He would never touch her-- never would he be a part of her or BJ's life again. As far as Amber was concerned, he had hurt them and that was enough to think of him as as good as dead.
She was going to make it.
Suddenly full of this new promise and bright with determination, Amber turned off the shower and got out.
Bathing was the ritual of her life. It was the most perfect routine that always calmed her down, and that made her feel pretty. She savored the delicious moments of soaking her skin in natural perfumes and, as Tai-San would say, letting the negative energy drain from her. She would lavishly shampoo her hair like she was a queen, and towel herself dry with only the most dry and fluffiest of towels.
Then she would make her way to the guest bedroom, and wipe herself down in lotion that moisturized every inch of her body that needed be. After she would get dressed, pick out a few rings or a necklace, and go back into the bathroom to do her hair.
As she looked into the mirror, her hair a lumpy mess, she noticed the television was off in the living room. She cocked her head out the door.
"BJ? Brady?"
No answer. Fear made a vein in her forehead throb violently. She felt the beautiful serenity the shower had given her die, just like her excitement about getting ready when she realized it really was for Lex. Gulping, she took the hot curling iron as a makeshift weapon for a just-in-case scenario and slowly stepped out of the bathroom, sweat popping up on her forehead.
"Gotcha Amber," A voice said.
Amber threw herself around to see Bray standing by the door, holding BJ and Brady by their mouths so they couldn't scream. Tears streamed down both their scared faces.
Her eyes wide in fear, Amber backed into the living room, the curling iron still in her hand.
"Bray," She gulped.
"It's me, b[b]i[/b]+ch," Bray sneered flatly. He glared at her, his eyes full of a hate she had never seen him wear before. He looked especially terrible. He hadn't shaved for what seemed like the entire duration of her stay at Trudy's, and he was wearing a white tanktop and black jeans that looked like they had been on him for days due to the large amount of stains upon them. Amber could smell the alcohol across the room.
"What do you want?" Amber moved in a pouncing pose slowly around the room as he did the same. They were like the hands of a clock, moving slowly around the width of the living area. But unlike a normal clock, the hands they represented were far apart.
"I want you and BJ back," Bray spat. BJ made a muffled cry for help.
Amber, despite her urge to scream and fall into a nervous wreck, stayed strong. The promise she had made to herself would not die when it was needed most.
"You can't have us back, Bray," Amber said powerfully. Bray glared, almost not recognziing her defying his authority.
"I said I-"
"You said a lot of things, Bray," Amber cut him off. The curling iron had pulled from the outlet in the bathroom, the cord dragging around the floor, but it was still hot enough to inflict damage.
"Better keep your little mouth shut," Bray shouted. He held BJ and Brady closer to him. They were trembling, trying to pull his hands from their faces.
"Bray this has nothing to do with the kids. Please, we can talk if you just let them go," Amber pleaded. Her voice was strong, full of the girl she had once been. Bray hated her now because he had recognized the return more than he ever had.
"I told you to keep your mouth shut!" He roared, his voice echoing off the walls.
Amber took a deep breath. "The old Bray wouldn't of done this."
Bray's face turned into shock. Instead of replying, he stared at her with a deathly gaze. She knew if he got to her she was dead.
"The old Bray is gone," Bray shot back angrily.
Amber kept moving sideways. Bray kept moving toward her way. He was eyeing the curling iron like it was a pathetic toy doll.
"Put the f.ucking curling iron down, Amber, and than I'll let the kids go," Bray said. He loosened the grip on BJ and Brady. They both inhaled deeply behind his looser hands. Their cries were more prevailent now they weren't stiffled.
"You have to promise me that Bray. Can you?"
"Put the curling iron down and the kids go free. I don't want to hurt them."
Amber set the curling iron down gently on the couch behind her. Before she could think a thought, Bray threw BJ and Brady hard behind him and ran to Amber. He gripped her wrists so tight the circulation was cut off, and he slammed her against the wall by the door.
"Bray, you said-"
"I say a lot of things, don't I?"
"Bray please!"
"You told all of our friends. You're dead, Amber. You're dead!"
Bray moved both of Amber's hands to one of his and reached into his pockets to withdraw a gun. Amber screamed.
"Brady, BJ, go into Trudy's room!"
"You shut the hell up!" Bray pointed the gun to the side of her head.
Amber screamed again. She hated him! She hated all he had done, and now she was helpless in his power. Damn him! Damn him! Tears smeared her face, snot dripped from her nose.
She screamed and screamed and screamed, and still he would not shoot her. She kicked her legs at him, even hitting him in the crotch but he wouldn't stop. The gun was pressed tightly into the side of her head. The round circle that could disperse her death forming a little dent in her skin.
"You coward! Shoot me!" Amber spit into his face.
He stared at her, trembling in his rage. He wiped the spit off and slapped her.
Bray beat the gun three times against the side of her head. A pain so strong hit every part of her body, though oddly enough her head didn't hurt she was in such shock. She could feel blood pouring past from the broken skin. She was falling into darkness...
The last things Amber heard and saw as she fell unconcious was Lex throwing the door open, Bray being smashed into the entrance wall, and the bullet meant for Amber sending bits of Trudy's apartment spraying into the afternoon sunlight.
The Special Circumstance papers Lex had brought with him?
They rifted from his hand and landed in a forming pool of Amber's blood.
~*~
When she woke up, Amber was in a bed at Tai-San's clinic. She suddenly broke from a dazed confusement to remember what had happend. She sat up quickly, no pain from the head wound hurting her.
"Your up!" Tai-San barged through a wooden door, dressed in her white coat, smiling.
"Tai-San! Bray came to the apartment, and Lex saved me-"
"Shhh," Tai-San pushed Amber down and sat next to her. "We know. That was four weeks ago, Amber."
"I've been here for a month!?" Amber cried in outrage.
"Yes. I kept you on heavy sedatives so you were sleeping for the entire healing process. You've been through too much trauma for your body to take, so I thought your mind could use a little break," Tai-San said.
Amber reached to the side of her head and felt a tiny bump. A tiny jolt of pain traced her nerves when she touched it, but other than that it was fine. That's why it's not hurting, she thought. It was healed.
She was grateful she hadn't been awake to feel that pain the wound would have sustained. Tai-San always had been a good healer.
"Where's Bray? How is Lex?" She suddenly cried.
"Bray has a hearing schueduled for next week with the Civil Court, but Lex wasn't hurt," Tai-San explained.
"Thank God. If..if he hadn't shown up, I would be dead," Amber whispered, Bray's hearing slipping from her mind. What she cared about was Lex.
"But he did. And he has a surprise for you," Tai-San said gently. She always talked about Lex with a goodness in her eye. She held no hard feelings against him. Their romance just hadn't been the right thing for either one of them. She had her memories, and for Tai-San that was enough.
"Lex is here?"
"Yes. He's come to see you every night since you've been here."
Amber said nothing, as Tai-San looked at her like she knew something Amber didn't and called Lex in.
Tai-San gave Lex the same look as he walked in and she out. He was wearing the hat, the jacket, and khaki slacks. They looked awfully businesslike and grownup for Lex. She smiled.
He rushed to her bedside.
"Amber," He whispered. He sat down on the stool, and brushed the hair from her face.
"Lex...I-"
"You don't have to say anything," Lex said.
"Why did you come? It wasn't noon yet..."
"Patch granted you everything right after I told him," Lex grinned widely.
"Oh my God...I'm...I-"
"You're divorced," Lex said under his breath while looking deeply into her eyes.
He bent down into the bed, and they kissed.
~*~
Readers,
Getting into the Ambex here kids! I hope you enjoy this part, as the story is starting to roll from here. I love you all, and appreciate all of the support you give me to continue writing not only this, but for future fics.
Hugs for all of you,
~h2o