The Hurting Time Has Come
An ER fan fiction by AbCaLuDa
A/N: A few reviews an emails have come in about the issue of Carter's sister. I know Carter has a sister who is out of the country and has never been seen on ER. For the purposes of this fic, labeled AU, that sister does not exist. I am creating a different set-up for the long lost sister…I hope that clears things up for everyone!
Chapter 6
The curtain has been pulled between Luka and Carter's beds. Deb is sitting with Luka, she looks up and nods as I open the door. "Hey. How's he doing?" I ask, hoping for some good news. I could really use something positive right now.
"Okay," she says with a weary sadness in her voice. "Sleeping. Elizabeth was just here. She says he's doing as well as she could hope."
"Good." I smile and move on to Carter's side of the room. She's sitting there, at his side, in my chair, holding his hand. I want to grab her and throw her out of the chair, away from him. Instead I take a deep breath and walk around to the other side of the bed.
She looks up, and her eyes are red rimmed and slightly puffy. So she's been crying. Big deal. Any actor can make fake tears on a dime. I'm not impressed. She's a fraud and I'm going to expose her for the gold digging bitch she is.
"Can I help you?" I ask with a sugar coated sweetness thick in my voice. I don't want Carter to sense anything wrong.
She pushes her fingers against her eyes, the way Carter often does when he's tired or stressed or thinking or just trying to occupy his hands. I refuse to acknowledge the likeness to Carter. She's not his sister. Can't be. He doesn't have a sister. She's been coached by his father…His father knows his mannerisms, knows just what to have his little puppet do to make me start to believe. Well, I have news for him. I don't believe, I won't believe.
"You must be Abby. My father has told me about you." Her words have a clipped, Canadian accent to them. Susan said she grew up in Montreal. I can believe that much. Doesn't mean she's Carter's sister.
I narrow my eyes at her. "I'm not buying into this illegitimate daughter, long lost sister storyline."
"He told me you would say that too, and we can debate it all afternoon, but not here." She glances at Carter, then draws her eyes back to me.
She has a point. We shouldn't talk here. I believe Carter can hear me when I talk to him, so he would hear us arguing and I wouldn't want to upset him. "Fine. Get out of my chair."
She looks at me like she wants to say something, but she thinks better of it and moves. I take her place, my place, at his side and reach for his hand. It's warm for her holding it. I close my eyes and kiss his knuckles.
"I don't even know your name."
"Gillian," she says softly. "Gillian Carter."
"I am only going to say this once, Gillian. If you hurt him, I swear to God I will kill you."
She blinks and takes a step back. "I understand you are upset, and I know my presence here must be a shock, but I am here to support my brother through-"
"Don't call him that."
"John then. I am here to support John through this difficult time."
"How do you know he would even want you here?" I ask, trying to force her hand, make her slip up. But what did I expect her to say? What could she say?
She takes a deep breath. "If we're going to talk about this, we need to go somewhere else."
"You go somewhere else. I'm staying right here." I want her to go away. Just go away and never come back. I don't believe her, I can't believe she is Carter's sister, even if she does the fingers against the eyes thing he does, even if her eyes are the same deep, warm chocolate brown, even if her jaw has a very Carter slant to it. No. Carter would have told me he had a sister, it would have come up, even if she wasn't raised with him, even if she is illegitimate.
"I will be back," she says, or maybe threatens. I don't care. She's leaving. That's all I care about. I need to be alone with Carter.
Once she's gone, I scoot the chair close to the edge of his bed and I lay my cheek against his chest so I can feel his heart beating. Tears fill my eyes and I don't try to stop them. What would be the point?
"I wish you would just wake up. Or me. I wish I would wake up and find out this is all just one big horrible nasty dream. Why can't this be just a dream, Carter?"
I imagine his hand at the back of my head, I can almost feel his fingers in my hair. He's telling me everything is going to be okay, and I turn to him, I'm standing now and I can feel his arms around me. He licks his lips and leans in to kiss me. Fireworks, exploding in my head, electrifying every nerve in me.
I slip my hand under his shirt, and he's sticky. Blood-sticky. I pull back from the kiss and look at his face. His eyes are glazed, he's bleeding from his mouth, his nose, everywhere. His clothes are soaked in it. He steps back, stumbled, falls. He's in the men's room, laying in a pool of his own blood. His and Luka's.
I try to scream, but there is no sound.
* * * * * * * * * *
Use the review option to let me know hat you think! Thanks for reading!
An ER fan fiction by AbCaLuDa
A/N: A few reviews an emails have come in about the issue of Carter's sister. I know Carter has a sister who is out of the country and has never been seen on ER. For the purposes of this fic, labeled AU, that sister does not exist. I am creating a different set-up for the long lost sister…I hope that clears things up for everyone!
Chapter 6
The curtain has been pulled between Luka and Carter's beds. Deb is sitting with Luka, she looks up and nods as I open the door. "Hey. How's he doing?" I ask, hoping for some good news. I could really use something positive right now.
"Okay," she says with a weary sadness in her voice. "Sleeping. Elizabeth was just here. She says he's doing as well as she could hope."
"Good." I smile and move on to Carter's side of the room. She's sitting there, at his side, in my chair, holding his hand. I want to grab her and throw her out of the chair, away from him. Instead I take a deep breath and walk around to the other side of the bed.
She looks up, and her eyes are red rimmed and slightly puffy. So she's been crying. Big deal. Any actor can make fake tears on a dime. I'm not impressed. She's a fraud and I'm going to expose her for the gold digging bitch she is.
"Can I help you?" I ask with a sugar coated sweetness thick in my voice. I don't want Carter to sense anything wrong.
She pushes her fingers against her eyes, the way Carter often does when he's tired or stressed or thinking or just trying to occupy his hands. I refuse to acknowledge the likeness to Carter. She's not his sister. Can't be. He doesn't have a sister. She's been coached by his father…His father knows his mannerisms, knows just what to have his little puppet do to make me start to believe. Well, I have news for him. I don't believe, I won't believe.
"You must be Abby. My father has told me about you." Her words have a clipped, Canadian accent to them. Susan said she grew up in Montreal. I can believe that much. Doesn't mean she's Carter's sister.
I narrow my eyes at her. "I'm not buying into this illegitimate daughter, long lost sister storyline."
"He told me you would say that too, and we can debate it all afternoon, but not here." She glances at Carter, then draws her eyes back to me.
She has a point. We shouldn't talk here. I believe Carter can hear me when I talk to him, so he would hear us arguing and I wouldn't want to upset him. "Fine. Get out of my chair."
She looks at me like she wants to say something, but she thinks better of it and moves. I take her place, my place, at his side and reach for his hand. It's warm for her holding it. I close my eyes and kiss his knuckles.
"I don't even know your name."
"Gillian," she says softly. "Gillian Carter."
"I am only going to say this once, Gillian. If you hurt him, I swear to God I will kill you."
She blinks and takes a step back. "I understand you are upset, and I know my presence here must be a shock, but I am here to support my brother through-"
"Don't call him that."
"John then. I am here to support John through this difficult time."
"How do you know he would even want you here?" I ask, trying to force her hand, make her slip up. But what did I expect her to say? What could she say?
She takes a deep breath. "If we're going to talk about this, we need to go somewhere else."
"You go somewhere else. I'm staying right here." I want her to go away. Just go away and never come back. I don't believe her, I can't believe she is Carter's sister, even if she does the fingers against the eyes thing he does, even if her eyes are the same deep, warm chocolate brown, even if her jaw has a very Carter slant to it. No. Carter would have told me he had a sister, it would have come up, even if she wasn't raised with him, even if she is illegitimate.
"I will be back," she says, or maybe threatens. I don't care. She's leaving. That's all I care about. I need to be alone with Carter.
Once she's gone, I scoot the chair close to the edge of his bed and I lay my cheek against his chest so I can feel his heart beating. Tears fill my eyes and I don't try to stop them. What would be the point?
"I wish you would just wake up. Or me. I wish I would wake up and find out this is all just one big horrible nasty dream. Why can't this be just a dream, Carter?"
I imagine his hand at the back of my head, I can almost feel his fingers in my hair. He's telling me everything is going to be okay, and I turn to him, I'm standing now and I can feel his arms around me. He licks his lips and leans in to kiss me. Fireworks, exploding in my head, electrifying every nerve in me.
I slip my hand under his shirt, and he's sticky. Blood-sticky. I pull back from the kiss and look at his face. His eyes are glazed, he's bleeding from his mouth, his nose, everywhere. His clothes are soaked in it. He steps back, stumbled, falls. He's in the men's room, laying in a pool of his own blood. His and Luka's.
I try to scream, but there is no sound.
* * * * * * * * * *
Use the review option to let me know hat you think! Thanks for reading!