I do not own Redwall... good enough?
Inspired by Lonewolf16's Redwall Defense Guide.
HOW TO CONQUER AN ABBEY IN LESS THEN 5 DAYS
Lesson One: Never go and demand in willy-nilly like!
Try to act nice as possible, which is pretty much impossible for us vermin types, eh? You don't go up to the gates and make a scene! If you have a horde, you must HIDE Them... Showing up at the gate with hundreds of fully armed vermin is not a good flippin' sign now is it...
Lesson Two: Don't carry a weapon where everyone can see the thing!
Now, excuse me if I sound rude but, use your BRAINS FOR ONCE! –cough- Right, now don't wave around a sword and yell and scream like, take it from the master –sarcasm here- Now, my brother acted pathetic to get it... follow his example. Abbey-beasts are not heart-less, like us vermin are. He threw himself down and pleaded... smart yet scary.
Lesson Three: Do not take these beasts lightly!
Okay, most Dim-witts think, "Oh those Redwall lot are bumpkins har..." They have badgers, otters and warrior mice! Do NOT mess with these guys... remember Cluny? The most famed warlord? Slain by a mouse. You may say "Oh It's just a {insert creature}!" But they are EVIL I tell you!
Lesson Four: How to open the gates!
This one is simple. Go to the SMALLER gates and lift the plank. Wow. I hope I made it easy enough for you to understand.
Lesson Five: The Horde
Let the horde in. Not so hard is it? Now march into the abbey and confront the foe. Archers in front sharpish now! Why yes, I was a drill sergeant... Keep the arrows pointed at otters, badgers and Abbot/Abbess or the mouse in the LARGE chair. Get the abbess/abbot. Hold for ransom of whatever you want, they WILL try something. Be on guard. If they refuse hold another hostage and well, kill him/her. Do NOT try this with young ones. Rage is a BAD thing with the abbey-beasts.
Well now all is done: So go and conquer Redwall, or any abbey. ;-; Such good students.
Inspired by Lonewolf16's Redwall Defense Guide.
HOW TO CONQUER AN ABBEY IN LESS THEN 5 DAYS
Lesson One: Never go and demand in willy-nilly like!
Try to act nice as possible, which is pretty much impossible for us vermin types, eh? You don't go up to the gates and make a scene! If you have a horde, you must HIDE Them... Showing up at the gate with hundreds of fully armed vermin is not a good flippin' sign now is it...
Lesson Two: Don't carry a weapon where everyone can see the thing!
Now, excuse me if I sound rude but, use your BRAINS FOR ONCE! –cough- Right, now don't wave around a sword and yell and scream like, take it from the master –sarcasm here- Now, my brother acted pathetic to get it... follow his example. Abbey-beasts are not heart-less, like us vermin are. He threw himself down and pleaded... smart yet scary.
Lesson Three: Do not take these beasts lightly!
Okay, most Dim-witts think, "Oh those Redwall lot are bumpkins har..." They have badgers, otters and warrior mice! Do NOT mess with these guys... remember Cluny? The most famed warlord? Slain by a mouse. You may say "Oh It's just a {insert creature}!" But they are EVIL I tell you!
Lesson Four: How to open the gates!
This one is simple. Go to the SMALLER gates and lift the plank. Wow. I hope I made it easy enough for you to understand.
Lesson Five: The Horde
Let the horde in. Not so hard is it? Now march into the abbey and confront the foe. Archers in front sharpish now! Why yes, I was a drill sergeant... Keep the arrows pointed at otters, badgers and Abbot/Abbess or the mouse in the LARGE chair. Get the abbess/abbot. Hold for ransom of whatever you want, they WILL try something. Be on guard. If they refuse hold another hostage and well, kill him/her. Do NOT try this with young ones. Rage is a BAD thing with the abbey-beasts.
Well now all is done: So go and conquer Redwall, or any abbey. ;-; Such good students.