Djiamren- Thanks a ton for your support. I have an unhealthy amount of
favorite reviewers! I didn't pick up cockney, and I couldn't speak it on
an everyday basis. I found it on the internet. It's used in London,
supposedly by thieves who didn't want anyone to know what they were talking
about. Fun, huh? The oar-bit's length is about a foot and a half. Sry I
should have mentioned that. You're cockney is just as good as mine!
Redwall Writer- Just the thought of working WITH Brian Jacques is overwhelming! I'd be stunned, but thank you for the tantalizing compliment.
Clara200- It's not you. It's me. I fell in love with the name Nanda while waiting for reviews. So- very sorry. To all those other readers- thanks for reading. I understand if you don't like to review, but it makes me VERY happy if you do! (no rhyme intended)
***
Of Pals and Gals
By: Catty Engles
Friga muttered darkly as she was forced to help drag a half-conscious Brini to the makeshift infirmary table. "Bad omens, we'll have trouble aplenty nowadays, bad omens"
Kessy stooped under the hefty otter's weight and reprimanded her friend, "That's about the fifth bad omen in the last two days. If you were right just half the time, my tail would have turned green and your nose fallen off many a day ago." At this, Friga muttered even more vehemently.
In the center of amidships, a fat, old harewife was bustling about. She wore a rosette pink, frilly bodice with extensions of lace and trimmings flouncing around her formidable waist. Flourishes of meticulous embroidering embellished her modest skirt's hem, and a frilly bonnet graced her head but with two holes for her ears, which flopped incredulously at the sight of Brini's injury.
"Good gracious, bring that poor martyr to the table at once. Gently now!" Her deep, imperious voice belayed her frivolous personage. Friga and Kessy gently laid Brini on the table in front of the harewife.
"I'm not a martyr yet, Auntie Enn! I'm not dead, am I?" Brini was always one to play Auntie Enn for an empty-headed old ninny. The hare would have none of this.
"Shut yore pie-hole lady-doe, and button yore gob too. Nanda! Nanda! Where is that silly goose." Auntie Enn searched wildly, bandages billowing over Brini's prone form, one catching her in the mouth. She moved to brush it away. Auntie Enn caught her paw and firmly returned it to its place on the examining table. "Don't move, martyr."
"Mut ne mandig!" Brini tried to speak through a mouthful of hard linen cloth. Auntie Enn didn't seem to notice, as her eyes were still questing for somebeast.
A tiny paw gently removed the scrap of bandage from Brini's mouth. A mousemaid stood next to the table, barely reaching its height. She was extremely short; this may have been accented by the oversized cotton dress draped over her painfully thin frame. An eccentric floppy bow drooped forlornly over one of her huge, glassy brown eyes.
"Nanda, there you are, dear!" Auntie Enn's voice became mild. The old harewife's eyes softened as she brushed the big bow away from Nanda's eyes. "Do you know where the cleaning salve is for infected wounds? And do you have any tonic left?"
The tiny mousemaid pointed a delicate paw to a basket set next to the table, and in a small quavering voice, answered, "The salve is in the basket like it always is. I have a little tonic left. I need to make more for my cough. Brini can use it."
"Dear, you are a dear!" Auntie Enn scooped up the glass cruet that Nanda offered to her. The old harewife busied herself with tending to the salve while handing Brini the cruet. The otter grimaced and gulped the cruet's contents. Her grimace quickly turned into a grateful smile.
"Nanda this is- Good! I didn't know tonics could taste so good!" Brini licked the glass container's lip and grinned broadly at the tiny mousemaid. She blushed and looked away.
"Here now, what is this? Mutiny and discord in the ranks? You, marm, have accused me of sour salves and tart tonics!" Auntie Enn's ears stood stiff. Brini's mouth dropped open at the old hare's touchiness.
"I did nothin' of the sort, your irritabliness!" The hare's nostrils flared and her lips went very thin. She swelled to her full height, preparing for a rebuttal.
Kessy grabbed Nanda's paw, murmuring to her small friend, "That's enough of that ole windbag." Nanda stifled a grin with her free paw and let herself be led to the for'c'sle cabin. Friga followed, still grumbling.
Kessy pushed back the heavy door. The soft, pungent smell of cedar assailed their noses. Two rows of three bunk beds lined the cabin's interior. "Oi, m'hearty, take the weight off'n yore plates o' meat and drop anchor on me pineapple." Freya was sitting on her bunk just inside the cabin.
She was looking expectantly at the trio of mousemaids. Not wanting to disappoint, Kessy plopped down beside the friendly squirrel. Nanda sidled in to sit next to her friend. Since there was no room left, Friga climbed the stepladder perched against bed and lay on the top bunk.
There was a comfortable silence as the friends listened to the Auntie Enn's prattlings. She reprimanded Brini harshly. All of them giggled helplessly at Brini's flabbergasted denials until Friga sat bolt upright, rapping her head on the low ceiling. A string of curses followed and Kessy covered Nanda's ears. "Curses like a searat, she does." Freya shook her head patronizingly.
"Did you hear that?" Friga demanded.
***
Chorls struggled with Ren's dead weight. He managed to drag the squirrel behind the for'c'sle cabin and behind some crates covered with waterproof tarp. Chorls talked animatedly with his unconscious companion.
"Bit unjustful for a chap to just pop off on their pal o' pals like that, bucko. Jolly unthoughtful of you. Well old bean, I might as well get forty winks if y'are goin' ta too, toodles!" And with that, Chorls curled up next to Ren and dropped off, in the midst of a heated battle. This was a feat only a hare could accomplish.
Ren woke to the sun sinking in the western skies. It painted the heavens with churning fire, throwing the clouds into sharp relief. Frothy whitecaps kissed the ship's hull and rocked it gently.
The pain behind Ren's eyes was fit to burst. It seemed like a hammer had pounded his head, leaving him blurry eyed. He squinted in the quickly receding sunlight. Chorls was curled into a ball, snoring happily. Ren poked him in the ribs. He woke with a start. Only half-awake, Chorls began bellowing at the top of his lungs, still immersed in a nightmare.
"Onward chaps! Forward the buffs, give 'em blood 'n vinegar! EIDLEWOOOO-oof!" Ren clobbered Chorls in mid-yell. The hare came completely awake as Ren thrust a stifling paw across Chorls' muzzle. They heard a clunk from the cabin directly behind them and then a string of curses.
"Searats!" Ren whispered vehemently. Chorls nodded, Ren's paw still covering his mouth. Ren started to slink away. Chorls began to do the same but in the opposite direction. The oar that still bound them stretched painfully, chafing the skin and knocking the two into each other. With muffled protests and much banging, the pair cooperated in tip-pawing to their right.
Friga's eyes darted around the room, trying to distinguish the source of the sound. Freya and Kessy were berating the mousemaid, condemning her colorful language. Friga rolled her eyes, but continued to search. 'It's not like they don't know where I get it from.' Just then Jyda burst into the for'c'sle cabin, her paws curled into tight fists and her teeth clenched. The twins, Lyn and Wyn, were still arguing. No solution had been reached. They still couldn't decide which dagger had killed the rat.
Something in Jyda snapped, she rounded on the pair, using the foulest language, only heard in the filthiest of slums. The twins chattering stopped immediately. The entire cabin had gone quiet. Kessy took her paws from Nanda's ears, and Freya shook her head again.
Twyler poked her head into the cabin, smiling jovially, "That's yer one fault, matey, letting Da rub off'n you too much." Before Jyda could answer back, another noise was heard. Friga glanced smugly around the cabin. Jyda's paw went to her belt immediately. She drew a small dagger made for throwing and motioned for everyone to be quiet. Twyler's eyes lit with battle fire. She motioned them out of the small cabin and began to circle it. Friga grabbed the lantern hung on the sidewall.
Nanda cringed against Kessy, breathing fast, "What is it, Kes?" Kessy smoothed Nanda's head fur, but before she could answer, Freya obliged.
"I'll tell ya straight up, me twist. It's a pillar if'n I ain't bacon an' a great knackered one a' tha'. We're gonna pop around the 'c'sle ta give the strawberry a li'le bo-peep!" She nodded approvingly at Nanda.
Kessy cleared her throat, "Yeah, well, I think it's a ghost, and Jyda wants ta find it!" Freya looked hurt, as if that's exactly what she had said, which it was.
At that moment, the sun sank completely under the horizon, throwing the ship into blue-gray shadows. Jyda gripped her dagger's handle, and Twyler brandished her whip. Friga moved to the front, so as to light their way with the lantern. The group began to round the corner.
A fly alighted on the ship's rigging. It buzzed happily, cleaning its wings and washing its oversized eyes, greatly enjoying the scene below. Jyda and Ren's groups were circling the cabin at about the same pace, both going in the same directions. It would take all night for them to run into one another. The fly took flight, buzzing in the direction of some delicious scents wafting from the ship's kitchen.
Unfortunately, Chorls' attuned nose had also caught the scrumptious aroma. His stomach burbled an extra loud rumble. He gazed at it mournfully. "Me ole tum 'as just been jawin' wid me backbone. They tend ta stick together when I'm a-hungered." He perked up as he directed a question towards Ren, "Wot say, you 'n me, pal o' pals, slip into that kitchen and filch a small repast fer a starving hare, wot wot?"
Ren glared condescendingly over his shoulder at the garrulous hare. "Not now." He hissed. Chorls dropped into a sulk, muttering under his breath but still loud enough so Ren could hear.
"From one flamin' slave driver to the next, I say. I hope someone remembers the brave young hare that withered away to nothing while his said pal 'o pals stuffs his famine-fed-face. I will suffer bravely, and carry on nobly, true-blue n' never fail, that's wot-"
"Shh." Ren clapped a paw over Chorls' mouth again. This time, Chorls batted it away arrogantly.
"Yew, baggy bellied belaying boat bottomed bilge rat! Stop chucking yer paw about 'n slapping it over a body's gob!"
"SHH!" Ren whispered more forcefully but kept his paws to himself, "Don't you see the light?" Chorls quickly returned to stealth mode. He matched his pace with Ren's. The squirrel pointed ahead. Like he said, a faint glow was bobbing around the corner. Shadows flickered in its pale radiance. Chorls' eyes hardened.
"Always better to go down fighting, I alus say." A stack of slender planks rested lengthwise on a ribbed barrel. Ren grasped one and passed another to Chorls. He swung the wood experimentally, feeling its balance. Chorls and Ren steeled themselves and marched onwards, toward the retreating light.
The hair on the back of Kessy's neck stood straight up. She glanced behind her, to be met with two looming shadows, accentuated by the wavering light's misleading glow. Chorls and Ren appeared to be twice their actual size.
Kessy had always been known for her exceptionally loud voice, she converted any doubters that night, "AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" At Kessy's scream, Jyda bounded into action. Ashlyn, the hare archer, was towards the back of the group. She leaped into the fray.
Chorls was caught completely off guard by Kessy's scream. He began bellowing his war cry at the top of his lungs, "EIDLEWOOOO-oof" Once again, he was caught in the stomach, mid-yell. Chorls fell, weighing on Ren's dominant paw, pinning him to one place. A stray footpaw kicked the lantern from Friga's paw. The ship was plunged into darkness. Freya dashed to the flickering embers.
Jyda barreled towards the remaining attacker. Ren saw her coming and lowered his center of gravity. In an act of practiced precision, Twyler's whip flicked around Ren's footpaw, unsteadying him even more. Jyda careened into his chest, pummeling him with two clasped paws. Ren received a blow to the face and tasted blood. He sputtered the first thing that came to mind, "Uncle, UNCLE!" Jyda hesitated, peering through the all- consuming darkness.
At that moment, Freya revived the guttering lantern. Ren's face was thrown into sharp relief. Jyda gasped and took a step back. Twyler flicked her whip away from the squirrel. Her jaw had dropped. Every face of the Queen's crew, including Ashlyn, was turned towards this newcomer's familiar features.
A resounding roar came from all of the crew's flabbergasted mouths, "REN!"
Redwall Writer- Just the thought of working WITH Brian Jacques is overwhelming! I'd be stunned, but thank you for the tantalizing compliment.
Clara200- It's not you. It's me. I fell in love with the name Nanda while waiting for reviews. So- very sorry. To all those other readers- thanks for reading. I understand if you don't like to review, but it makes me VERY happy if you do! (no rhyme intended)
***
Of Pals and Gals
By: Catty Engles
Friga muttered darkly as she was forced to help drag a half-conscious Brini to the makeshift infirmary table. "Bad omens, we'll have trouble aplenty nowadays, bad omens"
Kessy stooped under the hefty otter's weight and reprimanded her friend, "That's about the fifth bad omen in the last two days. If you were right just half the time, my tail would have turned green and your nose fallen off many a day ago." At this, Friga muttered even more vehemently.
In the center of amidships, a fat, old harewife was bustling about. She wore a rosette pink, frilly bodice with extensions of lace and trimmings flouncing around her formidable waist. Flourishes of meticulous embroidering embellished her modest skirt's hem, and a frilly bonnet graced her head but with two holes for her ears, which flopped incredulously at the sight of Brini's injury.
"Good gracious, bring that poor martyr to the table at once. Gently now!" Her deep, imperious voice belayed her frivolous personage. Friga and Kessy gently laid Brini on the table in front of the harewife.
"I'm not a martyr yet, Auntie Enn! I'm not dead, am I?" Brini was always one to play Auntie Enn for an empty-headed old ninny. The hare would have none of this.
"Shut yore pie-hole lady-doe, and button yore gob too. Nanda! Nanda! Where is that silly goose." Auntie Enn searched wildly, bandages billowing over Brini's prone form, one catching her in the mouth. She moved to brush it away. Auntie Enn caught her paw and firmly returned it to its place on the examining table. "Don't move, martyr."
"Mut ne mandig!" Brini tried to speak through a mouthful of hard linen cloth. Auntie Enn didn't seem to notice, as her eyes were still questing for somebeast.
A tiny paw gently removed the scrap of bandage from Brini's mouth. A mousemaid stood next to the table, barely reaching its height. She was extremely short; this may have been accented by the oversized cotton dress draped over her painfully thin frame. An eccentric floppy bow drooped forlornly over one of her huge, glassy brown eyes.
"Nanda, there you are, dear!" Auntie Enn's voice became mild. The old harewife's eyes softened as she brushed the big bow away from Nanda's eyes. "Do you know where the cleaning salve is for infected wounds? And do you have any tonic left?"
The tiny mousemaid pointed a delicate paw to a basket set next to the table, and in a small quavering voice, answered, "The salve is in the basket like it always is. I have a little tonic left. I need to make more for my cough. Brini can use it."
"Dear, you are a dear!" Auntie Enn scooped up the glass cruet that Nanda offered to her. The old harewife busied herself with tending to the salve while handing Brini the cruet. The otter grimaced and gulped the cruet's contents. Her grimace quickly turned into a grateful smile.
"Nanda this is- Good! I didn't know tonics could taste so good!" Brini licked the glass container's lip and grinned broadly at the tiny mousemaid. She blushed and looked away.
"Here now, what is this? Mutiny and discord in the ranks? You, marm, have accused me of sour salves and tart tonics!" Auntie Enn's ears stood stiff. Brini's mouth dropped open at the old hare's touchiness.
"I did nothin' of the sort, your irritabliness!" The hare's nostrils flared and her lips went very thin. She swelled to her full height, preparing for a rebuttal.
Kessy grabbed Nanda's paw, murmuring to her small friend, "That's enough of that ole windbag." Nanda stifled a grin with her free paw and let herself be led to the for'c'sle cabin. Friga followed, still grumbling.
Kessy pushed back the heavy door. The soft, pungent smell of cedar assailed their noses. Two rows of three bunk beds lined the cabin's interior. "Oi, m'hearty, take the weight off'n yore plates o' meat and drop anchor on me pineapple." Freya was sitting on her bunk just inside the cabin.
She was looking expectantly at the trio of mousemaids. Not wanting to disappoint, Kessy plopped down beside the friendly squirrel. Nanda sidled in to sit next to her friend. Since there was no room left, Friga climbed the stepladder perched against bed and lay on the top bunk.
There was a comfortable silence as the friends listened to the Auntie Enn's prattlings. She reprimanded Brini harshly. All of them giggled helplessly at Brini's flabbergasted denials until Friga sat bolt upright, rapping her head on the low ceiling. A string of curses followed and Kessy covered Nanda's ears. "Curses like a searat, she does." Freya shook her head patronizingly.
"Did you hear that?" Friga demanded.
***
Chorls struggled with Ren's dead weight. He managed to drag the squirrel behind the for'c'sle cabin and behind some crates covered with waterproof tarp. Chorls talked animatedly with his unconscious companion.
"Bit unjustful for a chap to just pop off on their pal o' pals like that, bucko. Jolly unthoughtful of you. Well old bean, I might as well get forty winks if y'are goin' ta too, toodles!" And with that, Chorls curled up next to Ren and dropped off, in the midst of a heated battle. This was a feat only a hare could accomplish.
Ren woke to the sun sinking in the western skies. It painted the heavens with churning fire, throwing the clouds into sharp relief. Frothy whitecaps kissed the ship's hull and rocked it gently.
The pain behind Ren's eyes was fit to burst. It seemed like a hammer had pounded his head, leaving him blurry eyed. He squinted in the quickly receding sunlight. Chorls was curled into a ball, snoring happily. Ren poked him in the ribs. He woke with a start. Only half-awake, Chorls began bellowing at the top of his lungs, still immersed in a nightmare.
"Onward chaps! Forward the buffs, give 'em blood 'n vinegar! EIDLEWOOOO-oof!" Ren clobbered Chorls in mid-yell. The hare came completely awake as Ren thrust a stifling paw across Chorls' muzzle. They heard a clunk from the cabin directly behind them and then a string of curses.
"Searats!" Ren whispered vehemently. Chorls nodded, Ren's paw still covering his mouth. Ren started to slink away. Chorls began to do the same but in the opposite direction. The oar that still bound them stretched painfully, chafing the skin and knocking the two into each other. With muffled protests and much banging, the pair cooperated in tip-pawing to their right.
Friga's eyes darted around the room, trying to distinguish the source of the sound. Freya and Kessy were berating the mousemaid, condemning her colorful language. Friga rolled her eyes, but continued to search. 'It's not like they don't know where I get it from.' Just then Jyda burst into the for'c'sle cabin, her paws curled into tight fists and her teeth clenched. The twins, Lyn and Wyn, were still arguing. No solution had been reached. They still couldn't decide which dagger had killed the rat.
Something in Jyda snapped, she rounded on the pair, using the foulest language, only heard in the filthiest of slums. The twins chattering stopped immediately. The entire cabin had gone quiet. Kessy took her paws from Nanda's ears, and Freya shook her head again.
Twyler poked her head into the cabin, smiling jovially, "That's yer one fault, matey, letting Da rub off'n you too much." Before Jyda could answer back, another noise was heard. Friga glanced smugly around the cabin. Jyda's paw went to her belt immediately. She drew a small dagger made for throwing and motioned for everyone to be quiet. Twyler's eyes lit with battle fire. She motioned them out of the small cabin and began to circle it. Friga grabbed the lantern hung on the sidewall.
Nanda cringed against Kessy, breathing fast, "What is it, Kes?" Kessy smoothed Nanda's head fur, but before she could answer, Freya obliged.
"I'll tell ya straight up, me twist. It's a pillar if'n I ain't bacon an' a great knackered one a' tha'. We're gonna pop around the 'c'sle ta give the strawberry a li'le bo-peep!" She nodded approvingly at Nanda.
Kessy cleared her throat, "Yeah, well, I think it's a ghost, and Jyda wants ta find it!" Freya looked hurt, as if that's exactly what she had said, which it was.
At that moment, the sun sank completely under the horizon, throwing the ship into blue-gray shadows. Jyda gripped her dagger's handle, and Twyler brandished her whip. Friga moved to the front, so as to light their way with the lantern. The group began to round the corner.
A fly alighted on the ship's rigging. It buzzed happily, cleaning its wings and washing its oversized eyes, greatly enjoying the scene below. Jyda and Ren's groups were circling the cabin at about the same pace, both going in the same directions. It would take all night for them to run into one another. The fly took flight, buzzing in the direction of some delicious scents wafting from the ship's kitchen.
Unfortunately, Chorls' attuned nose had also caught the scrumptious aroma. His stomach burbled an extra loud rumble. He gazed at it mournfully. "Me ole tum 'as just been jawin' wid me backbone. They tend ta stick together when I'm a-hungered." He perked up as he directed a question towards Ren, "Wot say, you 'n me, pal o' pals, slip into that kitchen and filch a small repast fer a starving hare, wot wot?"
Ren glared condescendingly over his shoulder at the garrulous hare. "Not now." He hissed. Chorls dropped into a sulk, muttering under his breath but still loud enough so Ren could hear.
"From one flamin' slave driver to the next, I say. I hope someone remembers the brave young hare that withered away to nothing while his said pal 'o pals stuffs his famine-fed-face. I will suffer bravely, and carry on nobly, true-blue n' never fail, that's wot-"
"Shh." Ren clapped a paw over Chorls' mouth again. This time, Chorls batted it away arrogantly.
"Yew, baggy bellied belaying boat bottomed bilge rat! Stop chucking yer paw about 'n slapping it over a body's gob!"
"SHH!" Ren whispered more forcefully but kept his paws to himself, "Don't you see the light?" Chorls quickly returned to stealth mode. He matched his pace with Ren's. The squirrel pointed ahead. Like he said, a faint glow was bobbing around the corner. Shadows flickered in its pale radiance. Chorls' eyes hardened.
"Always better to go down fighting, I alus say." A stack of slender planks rested lengthwise on a ribbed barrel. Ren grasped one and passed another to Chorls. He swung the wood experimentally, feeling its balance. Chorls and Ren steeled themselves and marched onwards, toward the retreating light.
The hair on the back of Kessy's neck stood straight up. She glanced behind her, to be met with two looming shadows, accentuated by the wavering light's misleading glow. Chorls and Ren appeared to be twice their actual size.
Kessy had always been known for her exceptionally loud voice, she converted any doubters that night, "AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" At Kessy's scream, Jyda bounded into action. Ashlyn, the hare archer, was towards the back of the group. She leaped into the fray.
Chorls was caught completely off guard by Kessy's scream. He began bellowing his war cry at the top of his lungs, "EIDLEWOOOO-oof" Once again, he was caught in the stomach, mid-yell. Chorls fell, weighing on Ren's dominant paw, pinning him to one place. A stray footpaw kicked the lantern from Friga's paw. The ship was plunged into darkness. Freya dashed to the flickering embers.
Jyda barreled towards the remaining attacker. Ren saw her coming and lowered his center of gravity. In an act of practiced precision, Twyler's whip flicked around Ren's footpaw, unsteadying him even more. Jyda careened into his chest, pummeling him with two clasped paws. Ren received a blow to the face and tasted blood. He sputtered the first thing that came to mind, "Uncle, UNCLE!" Jyda hesitated, peering through the all- consuming darkness.
At that moment, Freya revived the guttering lantern. Ren's face was thrown into sharp relief. Jyda gasped and took a step back. Twyler flicked her whip away from the squirrel. Her jaw had dropped. Every face of the Queen's crew, including Ashlyn, was turned towards this newcomer's familiar features.
A resounding roar came from all of the crew's flabbergasted mouths, "REN!"