Thank you all for reading my story and giving me wonderful reviews. You guys are like nothing I've ever seen before! You're awesome. I am considering turning this into the final chapter. If so, keep an eye out for any future stories.
SHOUT OUT!
moezy-chan::no, Raven watches out for Starfire, a lot more than the others realize and I wanted to point that out. Notice that she never comes within much speaking distance of Star, just makes sure the girl is okay. This chapter should clear things up a little bit better for you! ^.)^
*Starfire*:: Yeah! I know, he got hurt! Isn't it great?? hehe
StarfireRobin4ever::this chapter shall not disappoint you. Hope you like!
Eyes of Nevermore, Starbolt1218, SxStrngSamurai13, and TribeKitten:: thank you so much for all your wonderful comments, please continue reading. I hope you like where it will go.
Chapter 3 The Nearness of You
It was the morning after their unsuspected battle with Slade and the sun had yet to rise on their sleepy tower though Starfire was lying on upside down on her bed, her eyes half open and still wet with tears. All night she had had nightmares of Robin's fight with Slade, and of his injuries he received for her. Each time he died, though in very different ways. After the first two viewings of him being beaten to death, she swore off sleep until the torture would go away forever. She laid there with her feet on her pillow and her eyes moist from the memories. She was so tired, she knew it though she fought it. She knew that she needed sleep as much as the rest of them. Gradually her eyes began to drift shut until she realized their betrayal and popped them back open.
"Treacherous body...why do you betray me when you are fully aware that I wish not to sleep?" she questioned herself as she sat up. Maybe that position would make it easier to stay awake. It did, but it also reminded her how dry her throat had gotten from crying. "Perhaps a glass of water will calm these thoughts," she hoped aloud. Sliding on the fuzzy blue bedroom slippers that Beast Boy had gotten her for Christmas Starfire headed toward the door to her bedroom. Her room was neat and tidy, though her personal computer was decorated with clothes she had decided not to wear over the past week, and it was arranged with more happiness to its shape than any other room in the tower. Certainly if this room could not calm her heart, no room could, but it was worth the effort if only to quench her throat. As she came down the hall, slippers scuffing the carpet, she turned on the lights in the common room. Outside the glass door to the balcony the dark night sky was lightening slightly, telling her that the sun was going to be up in an hour or two and with it Raven. Perhaps she could speak with Raven as to why her heart felt so heavy in her chest. Why it pelted her with unpleasant images in her sleep. She was to the kitchen when she heard a tiny moan and some rustling breath.
"Hello? Who is there?" she jumped and reached for the closest object to protect her. Unfortunately it was a spatula and the sounds were coming from Robin who was forcing himself out of sleep to see who was there.
"Starfire?" he questioned. "What are you doing?" Starfire blushed from her hair to her toes when she saw his face. The spatula was dropped back onto the table with embarrassment and she averted her eyes as quickly as possible.
"Oh Robin...it is you," she answered nervously. "I was only getting a glass of water. I am sorry to have disturbed you," she apologized and bowed politely. Robin smiled groggily and got up off the couch.
"It's okay, better you than Beast Boy," he joked attempting to relieve her obvious humiliation. "Can't sleep?" he asked. Starfire nodded tiredly and dropped down onto one of the bar stools as her masked friend went around her to the other side of the couner. He leaned on it in front of her. "Bad dreams?"
"Terrible dreams..." she replied quietly. Robin was shocked at the sound of defeat in her voice and when she caught him staring at her he turned instantly.
"I'll get you some juice instead. Tastes better at least," he recovered. Starfire smiled weakly. She watched him reach for a small crystal glass and then go to the refridgerator.
"Robin...I wish to ask you something that has been a plague on my mind all this night," she started. He nodded to her as confirmance while he poured her drink and handed it to her. "If you were tired going up against Slade, how was it you managed the strength to defeat him so easily?"
Robin's eyes fell to the counter top, still heavy with sleep, as the woman he secretly loved took a sip of the drink he had fixed her. She wanted to know...should he tell her? What good would it do? Then again what harm would it do if she was already having nightmares...maybe the knowledge of how he was able to fight back would help her sleep...he never glanced up at her, instead speaking with his head hung. "He promised to kill you..." he answered simply. Starfire's drink froze in her hand and her eyes glittered with an unknown emotion. He took the chance of checking her reaction and was confused to find that she was shocked and somewhat anxious.
"Does that mean that he will return for me?" she asked. Guilt found it's way into Robin's stomach. She hadn't been upset over that? Well now she was, thanks to his brilliant deductions...he had to make sure that she felt perfectly safe, but Raven beat him to it.
"Not unless he has a death wish," she answered. Starfire turned and brightly grinned.
"Friend Raven! You are awake also now!" she greeted. Raven smiled at her weakly and came over to sit with them.
"Yeah, guess so," she said. Robin smiled, thankful for her interpretation of that answer without the foul language he would have used.
"Drink?" he asked and wiggled the jug at her. Raven shook her head.
"No thanks...it'll make me sleepy and that's the last thing I need...I fell asleep while I was meditating last night on rather or not Slade would return. I came to the conclusion no, but never left a deep sleep all night. That wrecks havoc on your brain and body," she explained, turning to Starfire's curious expression.
"Oh...I wish I had had that problem this night...Perhaps I too will sleep better tonight."
"I'm sure you will," indulged Raven. Robin took a hard look at Starfire, using all his mental skills and techniques to read what horrible thoughts were running through her head. All he found was that he was too exhausted. He had really over done it yesterday and now he was paying for it. Starfire seemed comfortable enough with Raven to have released the fear he'd found her with. It might actually be best for the both of them if he just went to his room and slept the rest of the day through. That at least that would give her the time to realign herself sleep obviously wasn't going to do it. "Robin, you okay?" asked Raven.
"Yes Robin, you seem to be sleeping with your eyes open," agreed Starfire. Robin couldn't fight the grin she caused him and just shook his head with a deep breath.
"I'm okay...just tired I guess. I think I'm gonna head off to bed actually. Maybe I'll feel better when I get up," he assured. Raven and Starfire both called good nights after him and wished him well as he headed to bed. That would definately help him rest better.
Raven and Starfire, however, spent their morning in a dramatically different way. For, what was probably the first time in her life, Raven spent the morning watching cartoons with Starfire until the boys woke up. They sat at opposite ends of the couch and took turns tossing Beast Boy's softball back and forth while the cartoons played as noise in the background.
"Raven..." asked Starfire as she tossed Raven the ball. There were small bags under her eyes that matched the bruise on her nose, but Raven never said a word. She knew something was wrong, that was why she was doing what she was doing, but she wasn't about to ask.
"Yeah?" Raven threw it back.
"Did you know that Robin was only able to defeat Slade, because he threatened to kill me?" Starfire threw Raven the ball.
"No...I didn't." Raven threw it back.
"It is true. Or so Robin told me. But I do not understand how that would give him more strength," said Starfire thoughtfully, holding the ball. She tossed it late. Raven thought for a moment.
"Well...did you ever consider the fact that he might actually like you?"
"Well I hope so."
"No, not like that," she said and threw Star the ball.
"Then how?"
"Well when a guy likes a girl it's not the normal kind of like," answered Raven. She tossed the Starfire the ball before she realized what she was doing. She was being normal. She was giving advice, hanging out, and even *shudder* watching cartoons. Perhaps her friendship with Starfire had done a lot more changing to her than she had thought and she couldn't decide if that was a good thing or a bad thing.
"You mean...Robin might care about me similar to the way in which I love him?" wondered Starfire. Raven's face went blank. Well there you had it, she'd just admitted she loved him. Too bad Robin wasn't in the room for it. Yet Raven, who was, had to admit herself that she was a little bit shocked in Starfire's bluntness.
"You mean you know you care about him?" she asked as Starfire threw her the ball.
"Of course I do. I always have."
"Then why in God's name don't you tell him, geez." Starfire looked at her confused as she accepted the round object back into her possesion.
"Tell him? But Robin does not love me as I love him. He never could. Why shall I burden his thoughts with my emotions?" she questioned as she threw her friend the ball. Though it had been in some odd english Raven took the answer to be the same response every other normal human girl had to telling their boyfriend they loved them.
"Ya know...that actually made sense," she smiled and tossed Star the ball. Starfire smiled and let the subject drop. She felt much better now that someone knew her feelings for the boy wonder and even better having voiced her confused position on what had saved Robin's life. Raven allowed it to drop, though no questions had really been answered. She was content with the nothing conversation that followed on how the cartoon cat could get hit so many times and still live.
Later that morning Beast Boy came drudging in, scratching his side and yawning. His hair was a green mess and his eyes were still crusted over, but apparentally that didn't matter to Starfire because she engulfed him with the most cheerful grin and good morning he'd ever gotten. He grunted in return when just then Cyborg shoved past him with a sigh.
"What's wrong?" asked Raven. Her face had gone expressionless again, but her voice had a tone of worry. Cyborg waved it off, telling her nothing was wrong, he was still sleepy.
"It is a wonderful morning Cyborg and Beast Boy. We should all be happy to be alive," grinned Starfire.
"Yeah, I know...when's breakfast?" Beast Boy asked roughly as he dropped down onto the couch near Raven. Starfire retracted her legs so that Cyborg could sit between them.
"Right before Robin awakes. I do not wish for him to also miss breakfast this morning as he has had such a hard night."
"What about us?" barked Cyborg in pain.
"But you are already up...why would I wait to cook for you?"
"Just go find something in the kitchen and stop being a baby," groaned Raven and her eyes went back to the TV. That was when Cyborg and Beast Boy realized they were watching cartoons without having to change the channel. Their eyes connected in a second of shell shocked silence right before the thunderous laughter exploded in the room. Starfire however did not understand at all what was funny.
"Why do you laugh?" she said, tilting her head quizically. Cyborg laid a heavy hand on her shoulder, dragging her into a slump as he laughed.
"Raven's watching cartoons!" he wailed. Beast Boy was slapping his knees. He refused to make eye contact with her. He did not want to know how angry she was over this one.
"What's so funny?" asked Robin as he came in wiping his eyes. Cyborg jumped up and turned around, while Starfire gazed at Robin in genuine concern.
"Look--what's--on the TV!" Robin's eyes went to the cartoon and then back to the crowd.
"We found Raven watching this when we came in!" shrieked Beast Boy between breaths. Robin started to chuckle quietly. Raven glared at him.
"What is so painfully humorous about that?" she demanded and forced Robin into an all out gut buster. Starfire floated out of her seat and flew over to the kitchen.
"Wonderous morning this is! Laughter so early! I shall make my earth speciality! PANCAKES!" she chirped and the boys stopped laughing to look at her, tongues lolling out. Starfire giggled. "But you must give them the appropriate amount of time to cook first," she added.
After breakfast the first rays of sunlight spilled into the room to remind everyone it was still very early. Robin slipped off quickly with the excuse of hunting down Slade's whereabouts (just in case), Cyborg went slowly to his lab to work some repairs on his leg, and Raven drifted, in her own time, to her room to finish meditating. Starfire enlisted the only remaining soul to teach her to play a video game, Beast Boy. Starfire recieved one lesson before Beast Boy began a killing spree, laughing with her all the way.
The sun was getting hotter outside and Cyborg could feel it in his upstairs lab. It had to be nearly ninety four degrees outside, which was a record if it was as late as his clock said. He tapped to make sure it didn't also need any repairs, but nothing changed. He pushed back from his table and stretched.
"ARGH! Must actually be two...wow. It's been quiet today, I'm actually nearly finished. I'll hurry up and get some fooooood," he cried victoriously before returning to the small screw driver sitting next to his arm.
Raven came into the common room feeling rather refreshed to find Beast Boy and Starfire working on sandwhiches in the kitchen. As she came over to them she spotted all the usual foods they piled onto their bread.
"Beast Boy, mustard is not made for eating. You are supposed to drink mustard," explained Starfire.
"Haha, no you aren't! You eat mustard not drink it. Look," he said and poured a huge glob on his tongue. Raven fought back her cringe, but Starfire seemed even more confused.
"But that is drinking," she said.
"No it's....whatever. You drink it, I'll eat it," he groaned and went back to his miticulous study of his sandwhich. Starfire looked to Raven and grinned.
"Good afternoon. Did your meditation go well? You are calm?"
"Yeah, as calm as you can be in this place," nodded Raven as she reached for the bread.
Downstairs Robin sat in front of his personal computer, the gigantic piece of billion dollar equipment his foster family (bruce wayne) had sent to him for better tactical research. It was spotless and working like a dream, but Robin's eyes had not been on it in quite a while. His chin was in his hand thinking. Thinking only on Starfire. So much had happened over the last two days that he wasn't sure where his brain was. Something had to give or he would before long. He was caught between knowing he was in love and telling himself he cared because they were friends. Everytime he envisioned them together though his mind slipped into the ripple of her hair and sparkle in her emerald eyes every time she smiled. She was so loving and warm. No one could be past Starfire's love, other than Slade. His expression dropped instantly remembering how she'd screamed angrily at Slade and the arrogant response she had gotten. Had he been any normal guy and Robin had had the strength to stand up, Slade would have paid for calling her his "dear little Starfire". He grimaced angrily.
"Hey Rob, you in there?" called Cyborg from the other side of his door. Robin blinked out of his thoughts and looked over to the door.
"Yeah, I'm here. What is it? Something wrong?"
"Nah, I was just headed downstairs and figured you'd still be in here workin. You're a work-oholic ya know," smiled Cyborg as the door closed behind him. "Find anything?" Robin shook his head.
"Cyborg, lemme ask you somethin, and promise not to tell anyone you heard me say this or I'll delete you!" he warned. Cyborg's eyes narrowed but then he smirked and nodded.
"Shoot."
"I know you remember last night, but...do you remember how I beat the shit outta Slade?" he snarled. Cyborg jumped back a little at the hatred in his friend's voice.
"Yeah," he answered caustiously.
"How did I do it? I mean I know why I did it, but....he promised to kill Starfire, Cy. And when he said it my blood just set on fire. I wanted to kill him for threatening her...."
"Just Starfire? Not all of us?"
"No..he said Starfire...Starfire was all I was thinking about."
"And Starfire's all you can think about now, right?" Robin didn't answer. His eyes were elsewhere with his mind so Cyborg kept going. "Welp, sounds like you got da love bug. I mean we can all see it, guess Slade just tipped you off when he used her to get to you. But man, I don't think he'll be doing that again anytime soon, that's unless he's completely insane." Robin allowed a huff of laughter out of his chest and grinned.
"You think so? You really think I'm inlove with Starfire?" the words sounded foreign to his ears and felt like warm honey falling off his lips. Could that be true? Could that be why he's so intent on finding Slade now when before he just hoped he went away?
"Man, please tell me you haven't been up here thinking about that all day!" yelled Cyborg. Robin blushed.
"Not all day. Just the last few minutes," he lied. "And whadda mean all day? It's only twelve."
"Dude your clocks suck. Such a waste of technology....it's two thirty MAN!"
"Wow...it got later than I thought. What happened to the others?"
"Dunno, stopped by here on my way down for some chow."
"Sounds good. I think I'll finish this tomorrow...I'm beginning to feel last night," agreed Robin as he rubbed his head.
"Race ya!" laughed Cyborg as he took off. Robin nearly tripped over his chair trying to join in but was already way far behind. Suddenly a loud, terror filled shriek filled the air.
"AHHHHHHHHHH!" Her blood chilling scream echoed down every hallway of the Titan Tower and pierced through Robin and Cyborg's ears as the door slid open in front of them. What they found, much to their surprise, was not Slade nor anyone else that didn't belong. It was a gigantic green spider, crawling on the ground after a terrified Starfire who was shooting at him with starbolts as she flew.
"Stop it! Beast Boy that is not funny!" she wailed. Beast Boy stopped and turned back into his human form, rolling with laughter.
"Hahaha, that was great!" he beamed until he saw the dark, vengeful expression on Starfire's face.
"Beast Boy, I am now going to injure you," she said simply and began chasing him around the room with her eyes glowing green and him squealing like a little girl. Raven watched them from the counter where she was still finishing off her sandwhich and the boys started laughing. Starfire stopped and turned to see Robin standing in the doorway.
"Hello Robin!" she smiled. Beast Boy took this chance to escape while his loving friend was distracted, but was caught when she turned her head straight to him. "Good bye Robin," she called without looking away from her prey. A green cheetah then shot across the room, followed by a girl Tamaranian. Cyborg and Robin laughed until their voices were hoarse and their faces hurt from smiling. Watching them Robin thought how much her happiness relieved his burdens and soothed him.
That night, while everyone was in bed, Robin tossed against his pillow. He'd laid down nearly three hours ago but couldn't go to sleep. His mind was too preoccupied. His mind, or his heart rather, was running over Starfire again and again. Finally he got up and went for a walk, hoping that it would clear his mind. But there was no running from the fact that Cyborg was right. He was inlove with the red haired beauty, madly head over heels in love with her. But would he tell her? He passed by the common room door and remembered waking up to her upset features. He had even made it worse when he told her why he'd managed to survive. He couldn't tell her. He couldn't take the risk of hurting her again. He walked by the training room and remembered her delicate whimpering...who gave her that crazy idea anyway?? Couldn't have been Raven, he thought as he walked past Raven's room. She's too level headed. He grinned at the idea. Calm, quiet Raven being Starfire's best friend. Starfire, the most emotional, excitable, loving, compassionate, beautiful, tenderhearted, heart wrenching person he'd ever met. With a sigh he surrendered. She was the only person now and ever for him...now if he could just go to sleep. Robin looked up and down the hall.
"Huh? Where am I?" he said aloud and looked around. Starfire's door stood on his right, closed tight. Figures...he was drawn to her...With another sigh Robin sat down in front of her door and stared at it as though any second he expected her to come out and snuggle into his arms. He wondered how he had ever gotten along without her touch. When he held her hand the other night, he'd been nervous yeah, but it felt right. He let his head fall back and his eye lids fall half shut thinking about it. That was when he heard it. Muffled sounds of distress and fear coming out of her room. It was as if deep within she was being tortured. He was on his feet faster than he realized and next to the door. "Starfire? Hey Star, you okay?" he asked.
"mm..nh-RObin..."she moaned, her voice streaked with fear.
"I'm coming Star...." he assured, knowing she couldn't hear him, as he over rode the locks in her door. It wasn't moving fast enough, he had to help her. What if.....SLADE....Robin backed away from Starfire's door and smashed the locks with his foot. Instantly he was granted access and went running to her bedside. But she wasn't in danger. She wasn't even being hurt. She was sleeping. She was deep within a dream, feet resting on her pillow and her head curled tightly in her blankets while her eyebrows furrowed with worry and she kept tossing against her mattress. Robin smiled to himself. Even in her most terrifying moment she was beautiful.
"Slade I asked you....NO!" Starfire yelped and started fighting her sheets violently. Robin decided this was a not so peaceful nightmare...especially if it involved Slade. Reaching a hand to her shoulder he shook her softly.
"Star, starfire! Wake up! It's a dream," he cried.Starfire was sitting bolt up right, eye to eye with him in less than a second. Her emerald eyes swelled with tears at seeing him and before he could register that she was awake she was wrapped up in his arms crying.
"Oh Robin, it fills my heart with relief to see you alive! He was killing you and I could not free you from his grasp. Oh I wish I had never seen Slade that night nor heard his voice in my ear! He could have killed you!" she whined, body jerking with sobs. Robin's weak grip on her tightened, holding her so close to his heart that he could smell her skin. Her sobs were a part of him, her pain ran in his veins. It took all his willpower not to join in on her tears for he had had that same nightmare, only in the opposite direction mere hours ago.
"Shh, Starfire, it's alright...you were only dreaming. You're awake now," he promised and hugged her tighter. Starfire's wet eyes blinked against his chest. She was in his arms, his strong protective arms. "I'm not hurt I swear, I'm alright...and I'm not going to let anything happen to you. Never," he vowed. Starfire sat up and gazed into the eyes of her rescuer. He was hurting...for her. God how he made her love him....how had he known she needed him anyway? Always there, always near...
"Robin...I am glad that you are here, but how I do not understand..."
"I was walking around when I heard you yelling," he explained, "I kinda...broke down the door," he added embarrassedly. Starfire looked over and sniffed. Sure enough the door was open and not moving. She blushed herself.
"You did that to save me Robin...you are the best human I will ever know, and you are far better than any tamaranian. Your mind solves so many problems and your heart helps you feel so much for others...you have put your life on the line for me and--" her hand reached up to the scabbing gash on his cheek with a memory of Slade looming over him. "I could not stand to lose you Robin, nor the friendship you bestow on me. No one can ever replace you in my heart...please, promise me that you will take better care of your being," she begged, staring into his eyes with a white hot intensity he'd never seen her have before. There was no smile on her face, no giggle in her eyes, only the raw vulnerable affection within her and the soft cushion of her fingertip on his cut.
"I'd rather you take care of me," he replied, never turning his gaze. He could see her jump with surprise, that cute way her eyes lit up with confusion, but he didn't move.
"What do you mean by that Robin?" Her heart was throbbing. He couldn't possibly mean what she thought, could he?
"I mean I love you Star... more than anything in this world and I would gladly give up my life a million times just to see you smile. You're always on my mind in some way and I can't fight it anymore. I'm inlove with you," he said with an explosion of emotion. His face, turned conviently away, was as bright red as her hair and getting brighter. Starfire moved her hand from his cheek to his hand that rested in his lap and gripped it tightly. She waited for him to turn his head and look at her. Her eyes were sparkling as though every star in the world had been captured there and held just for him.
"And I too am inlove with you Robin," she said happily. Robin smirked and squeezed her hand back. Finally, his mind was at an ease it had almost never reached before. She loved him. She, Starfire, loved him...he felt as though he'd had the obvious pointed out to him by his best friend in the world. They were inlove...he couldn't say it enough. A nervous laugh found it's way to her ears.
"Well if that's the case, there's something I've ALWAYS wanted to do," he said. She didn't have time to question as to what it was because she felt his hand on the small of her back as it pulled her forward and the warm embrace of his arm around her shoulders. Lastly, but most heavenly, she felt his lips pressed down hard against her own. They were soft and strong, guiding her into motions she had never made while his arms held her closer than she'd ever been held. She didn't know what to do, she was frozen against him. A deep humiliation was welling up inside her when she suddenly felt his tongue against her lips begging entrance. Her eyes drifted shut, it didn't matter if she was too stupid...he would tell her what to do. She released the tension inside her, basking in the attention he was showing her when she suddenly felt his lips stop and he pulled away from. Robin's face couldn't have been brighter if he'd colored it and he was twitching slightly from nerves.
"Why did you stop?" she asked innocently. Robin chuckled.
"I guess I'm nervous," he admited. Starfire smiled at him and then leapt, pushing her boy wonder to the bed, landing on top of him with a grin. Red hair dangled in his face while her breath warmed his face. The blood drained out of his cheeks when he felt her breasts against his chest and her nose brush the tip of his own. Taking what little he had taught her already Starfire claimed his lips as hers and hers alone, licking at his lips the same way he had. Surely that would cease his nervousness? She pulled back to check and saw him grinning bigger than he'd ever grinned. He was utterly happy and that pleased her most.
"Are you still nervous, dear Robin?" she asked innocently. Robin shook his head and reached a hand up through her hair to her neck, pulling her face lower. She wasn't expecting the sudden movement of the earth, but was pleasantly surprised to find herself beneath Robin when it stopped. He really wanted more room to move.
"Nope," he said and finally lowered his lips fiercely against hers. Starfire willingly accepted the wet force of his tongue into her mouth and the firm, but gentle touch of his hands.
SHOUT OUT!
moezy-chan::no, Raven watches out for Starfire, a lot more than the others realize and I wanted to point that out. Notice that she never comes within much speaking distance of Star, just makes sure the girl is okay. This chapter should clear things up a little bit better for you! ^.)^
*Starfire*:: Yeah! I know, he got hurt! Isn't it great?? hehe
StarfireRobin4ever::this chapter shall not disappoint you. Hope you like!
Eyes of Nevermore, Starbolt1218, SxStrngSamurai13, and TribeKitten:: thank you so much for all your wonderful comments, please continue reading. I hope you like where it will go.
Chapter 3 The Nearness of You
It was the morning after their unsuspected battle with Slade and the sun had yet to rise on their sleepy tower though Starfire was lying on upside down on her bed, her eyes half open and still wet with tears. All night she had had nightmares of Robin's fight with Slade, and of his injuries he received for her. Each time he died, though in very different ways. After the first two viewings of him being beaten to death, she swore off sleep until the torture would go away forever. She laid there with her feet on her pillow and her eyes moist from the memories. She was so tired, she knew it though she fought it. She knew that she needed sleep as much as the rest of them. Gradually her eyes began to drift shut until she realized their betrayal and popped them back open.
"Treacherous body...why do you betray me when you are fully aware that I wish not to sleep?" she questioned herself as she sat up. Maybe that position would make it easier to stay awake. It did, but it also reminded her how dry her throat had gotten from crying. "Perhaps a glass of water will calm these thoughts," she hoped aloud. Sliding on the fuzzy blue bedroom slippers that Beast Boy had gotten her for Christmas Starfire headed toward the door to her bedroom. Her room was neat and tidy, though her personal computer was decorated with clothes she had decided not to wear over the past week, and it was arranged with more happiness to its shape than any other room in the tower. Certainly if this room could not calm her heart, no room could, but it was worth the effort if only to quench her throat. As she came down the hall, slippers scuffing the carpet, she turned on the lights in the common room. Outside the glass door to the balcony the dark night sky was lightening slightly, telling her that the sun was going to be up in an hour or two and with it Raven. Perhaps she could speak with Raven as to why her heart felt so heavy in her chest. Why it pelted her with unpleasant images in her sleep. She was to the kitchen when she heard a tiny moan and some rustling breath.
"Hello? Who is there?" she jumped and reached for the closest object to protect her. Unfortunately it was a spatula and the sounds were coming from Robin who was forcing himself out of sleep to see who was there.
"Starfire?" he questioned. "What are you doing?" Starfire blushed from her hair to her toes when she saw his face. The spatula was dropped back onto the table with embarrassment and she averted her eyes as quickly as possible.
"Oh Robin...it is you," she answered nervously. "I was only getting a glass of water. I am sorry to have disturbed you," she apologized and bowed politely. Robin smiled groggily and got up off the couch.
"It's okay, better you than Beast Boy," he joked attempting to relieve her obvious humiliation. "Can't sleep?" he asked. Starfire nodded tiredly and dropped down onto one of the bar stools as her masked friend went around her to the other side of the couner. He leaned on it in front of her. "Bad dreams?"
"Terrible dreams..." she replied quietly. Robin was shocked at the sound of defeat in her voice and when she caught him staring at her he turned instantly.
"I'll get you some juice instead. Tastes better at least," he recovered. Starfire smiled weakly. She watched him reach for a small crystal glass and then go to the refridgerator.
"Robin...I wish to ask you something that has been a plague on my mind all this night," she started. He nodded to her as confirmance while he poured her drink and handed it to her. "If you were tired going up against Slade, how was it you managed the strength to defeat him so easily?"
Robin's eyes fell to the counter top, still heavy with sleep, as the woman he secretly loved took a sip of the drink he had fixed her. She wanted to know...should he tell her? What good would it do? Then again what harm would it do if she was already having nightmares...maybe the knowledge of how he was able to fight back would help her sleep...he never glanced up at her, instead speaking with his head hung. "He promised to kill you..." he answered simply. Starfire's drink froze in her hand and her eyes glittered with an unknown emotion. He took the chance of checking her reaction and was confused to find that she was shocked and somewhat anxious.
"Does that mean that he will return for me?" she asked. Guilt found it's way into Robin's stomach. She hadn't been upset over that? Well now she was, thanks to his brilliant deductions...he had to make sure that she felt perfectly safe, but Raven beat him to it.
"Not unless he has a death wish," she answered. Starfire turned and brightly grinned.
"Friend Raven! You are awake also now!" she greeted. Raven smiled at her weakly and came over to sit with them.
"Yeah, guess so," she said. Robin smiled, thankful for her interpretation of that answer without the foul language he would have used.
"Drink?" he asked and wiggled the jug at her. Raven shook her head.
"No thanks...it'll make me sleepy and that's the last thing I need...I fell asleep while I was meditating last night on rather or not Slade would return. I came to the conclusion no, but never left a deep sleep all night. That wrecks havoc on your brain and body," she explained, turning to Starfire's curious expression.
"Oh...I wish I had had that problem this night...Perhaps I too will sleep better tonight."
"I'm sure you will," indulged Raven. Robin took a hard look at Starfire, using all his mental skills and techniques to read what horrible thoughts were running through her head. All he found was that he was too exhausted. He had really over done it yesterday and now he was paying for it. Starfire seemed comfortable enough with Raven to have released the fear he'd found her with. It might actually be best for the both of them if he just went to his room and slept the rest of the day through. That at least that would give her the time to realign herself sleep obviously wasn't going to do it. "Robin, you okay?" asked Raven.
"Yes Robin, you seem to be sleeping with your eyes open," agreed Starfire. Robin couldn't fight the grin she caused him and just shook his head with a deep breath.
"I'm okay...just tired I guess. I think I'm gonna head off to bed actually. Maybe I'll feel better when I get up," he assured. Raven and Starfire both called good nights after him and wished him well as he headed to bed. That would definately help him rest better.
Raven and Starfire, however, spent their morning in a dramatically different way. For, what was probably the first time in her life, Raven spent the morning watching cartoons with Starfire until the boys woke up. They sat at opposite ends of the couch and took turns tossing Beast Boy's softball back and forth while the cartoons played as noise in the background.
"Raven..." asked Starfire as she tossed Raven the ball. There were small bags under her eyes that matched the bruise on her nose, but Raven never said a word. She knew something was wrong, that was why she was doing what she was doing, but she wasn't about to ask.
"Yeah?" Raven threw it back.
"Did you know that Robin was only able to defeat Slade, because he threatened to kill me?" Starfire threw Raven the ball.
"No...I didn't." Raven threw it back.
"It is true. Or so Robin told me. But I do not understand how that would give him more strength," said Starfire thoughtfully, holding the ball. She tossed it late. Raven thought for a moment.
"Well...did you ever consider the fact that he might actually like you?"
"Well I hope so."
"No, not like that," she said and threw Star the ball.
"Then how?"
"Well when a guy likes a girl it's not the normal kind of like," answered Raven. She tossed the Starfire the ball before she realized what she was doing. She was being normal. She was giving advice, hanging out, and even *shudder* watching cartoons. Perhaps her friendship with Starfire had done a lot more changing to her than she had thought and she couldn't decide if that was a good thing or a bad thing.
"You mean...Robin might care about me similar to the way in which I love him?" wondered Starfire. Raven's face went blank. Well there you had it, she'd just admitted she loved him. Too bad Robin wasn't in the room for it. Yet Raven, who was, had to admit herself that she was a little bit shocked in Starfire's bluntness.
"You mean you know you care about him?" she asked as Starfire threw her the ball.
"Of course I do. I always have."
"Then why in God's name don't you tell him, geez." Starfire looked at her confused as she accepted the round object back into her possesion.
"Tell him? But Robin does not love me as I love him. He never could. Why shall I burden his thoughts with my emotions?" she questioned as she threw her friend the ball. Though it had been in some odd english Raven took the answer to be the same response every other normal human girl had to telling their boyfriend they loved them.
"Ya know...that actually made sense," she smiled and tossed Star the ball. Starfire smiled and let the subject drop. She felt much better now that someone knew her feelings for the boy wonder and even better having voiced her confused position on what had saved Robin's life. Raven allowed it to drop, though no questions had really been answered. She was content with the nothing conversation that followed on how the cartoon cat could get hit so many times and still live.
Later that morning Beast Boy came drudging in, scratching his side and yawning. His hair was a green mess and his eyes were still crusted over, but apparentally that didn't matter to Starfire because she engulfed him with the most cheerful grin and good morning he'd ever gotten. He grunted in return when just then Cyborg shoved past him with a sigh.
"What's wrong?" asked Raven. Her face had gone expressionless again, but her voice had a tone of worry. Cyborg waved it off, telling her nothing was wrong, he was still sleepy.
"It is a wonderful morning Cyborg and Beast Boy. We should all be happy to be alive," grinned Starfire.
"Yeah, I know...when's breakfast?" Beast Boy asked roughly as he dropped down onto the couch near Raven. Starfire retracted her legs so that Cyborg could sit between them.
"Right before Robin awakes. I do not wish for him to also miss breakfast this morning as he has had such a hard night."
"What about us?" barked Cyborg in pain.
"But you are already up...why would I wait to cook for you?"
"Just go find something in the kitchen and stop being a baby," groaned Raven and her eyes went back to the TV. That was when Cyborg and Beast Boy realized they were watching cartoons without having to change the channel. Their eyes connected in a second of shell shocked silence right before the thunderous laughter exploded in the room. Starfire however did not understand at all what was funny.
"Why do you laugh?" she said, tilting her head quizically. Cyborg laid a heavy hand on her shoulder, dragging her into a slump as he laughed.
"Raven's watching cartoons!" he wailed. Beast Boy was slapping his knees. He refused to make eye contact with her. He did not want to know how angry she was over this one.
"What's so funny?" asked Robin as he came in wiping his eyes. Cyborg jumped up and turned around, while Starfire gazed at Robin in genuine concern.
"Look--what's--on the TV!" Robin's eyes went to the cartoon and then back to the crowd.
"We found Raven watching this when we came in!" shrieked Beast Boy between breaths. Robin started to chuckle quietly. Raven glared at him.
"What is so painfully humorous about that?" she demanded and forced Robin into an all out gut buster. Starfire floated out of her seat and flew over to the kitchen.
"Wonderous morning this is! Laughter so early! I shall make my earth speciality! PANCAKES!" she chirped and the boys stopped laughing to look at her, tongues lolling out. Starfire giggled. "But you must give them the appropriate amount of time to cook first," she added.
After breakfast the first rays of sunlight spilled into the room to remind everyone it was still very early. Robin slipped off quickly with the excuse of hunting down Slade's whereabouts (just in case), Cyborg went slowly to his lab to work some repairs on his leg, and Raven drifted, in her own time, to her room to finish meditating. Starfire enlisted the only remaining soul to teach her to play a video game, Beast Boy. Starfire recieved one lesson before Beast Boy began a killing spree, laughing with her all the way.
The sun was getting hotter outside and Cyborg could feel it in his upstairs lab. It had to be nearly ninety four degrees outside, which was a record if it was as late as his clock said. He tapped to make sure it didn't also need any repairs, but nothing changed. He pushed back from his table and stretched.
"ARGH! Must actually be two...wow. It's been quiet today, I'm actually nearly finished. I'll hurry up and get some fooooood," he cried victoriously before returning to the small screw driver sitting next to his arm.
Raven came into the common room feeling rather refreshed to find Beast Boy and Starfire working on sandwhiches in the kitchen. As she came over to them she spotted all the usual foods they piled onto their bread.
"Beast Boy, mustard is not made for eating. You are supposed to drink mustard," explained Starfire.
"Haha, no you aren't! You eat mustard not drink it. Look," he said and poured a huge glob on his tongue. Raven fought back her cringe, but Starfire seemed even more confused.
"But that is drinking," she said.
"No it's....whatever. You drink it, I'll eat it," he groaned and went back to his miticulous study of his sandwhich. Starfire looked to Raven and grinned.
"Good afternoon. Did your meditation go well? You are calm?"
"Yeah, as calm as you can be in this place," nodded Raven as she reached for the bread.
Downstairs Robin sat in front of his personal computer, the gigantic piece of billion dollar equipment his foster family (bruce wayne) had sent to him for better tactical research. It was spotless and working like a dream, but Robin's eyes had not been on it in quite a while. His chin was in his hand thinking. Thinking only on Starfire. So much had happened over the last two days that he wasn't sure where his brain was. Something had to give or he would before long. He was caught between knowing he was in love and telling himself he cared because they were friends. Everytime he envisioned them together though his mind slipped into the ripple of her hair and sparkle in her emerald eyes every time she smiled. She was so loving and warm. No one could be past Starfire's love, other than Slade. His expression dropped instantly remembering how she'd screamed angrily at Slade and the arrogant response she had gotten. Had he been any normal guy and Robin had had the strength to stand up, Slade would have paid for calling her his "dear little Starfire". He grimaced angrily.
"Hey Rob, you in there?" called Cyborg from the other side of his door. Robin blinked out of his thoughts and looked over to the door.
"Yeah, I'm here. What is it? Something wrong?"
"Nah, I was just headed downstairs and figured you'd still be in here workin. You're a work-oholic ya know," smiled Cyborg as the door closed behind him. "Find anything?" Robin shook his head.
"Cyborg, lemme ask you somethin, and promise not to tell anyone you heard me say this or I'll delete you!" he warned. Cyborg's eyes narrowed but then he smirked and nodded.
"Shoot."
"I know you remember last night, but...do you remember how I beat the shit outta Slade?" he snarled. Cyborg jumped back a little at the hatred in his friend's voice.
"Yeah," he answered caustiously.
"How did I do it? I mean I know why I did it, but....he promised to kill Starfire, Cy. And when he said it my blood just set on fire. I wanted to kill him for threatening her...."
"Just Starfire? Not all of us?"
"No..he said Starfire...Starfire was all I was thinking about."
"And Starfire's all you can think about now, right?" Robin didn't answer. His eyes were elsewhere with his mind so Cyborg kept going. "Welp, sounds like you got da love bug. I mean we can all see it, guess Slade just tipped you off when he used her to get to you. But man, I don't think he'll be doing that again anytime soon, that's unless he's completely insane." Robin allowed a huff of laughter out of his chest and grinned.
"You think so? You really think I'm inlove with Starfire?" the words sounded foreign to his ears and felt like warm honey falling off his lips. Could that be true? Could that be why he's so intent on finding Slade now when before he just hoped he went away?
"Man, please tell me you haven't been up here thinking about that all day!" yelled Cyborg. Robin blushed.
"Not all day. Just the last few minutes," he lied. "And whadda mean all day? It's only twelve."
"Dude your clocks suck. Such a waste of technology....it's two thirty MAN!"
"Wow...it got later than I thought. What happened to the others?"
"Dunno, stopped by here on my way down for some chow."
"Sounds good. I think I'll finish this tomorrow...I'm beginning to feel last night," agreed Robin as he rubbed his head.
"Race ya!" laughed Cyborg as he took off. Robin nearly tripped over his chair trying to join in but was already way far behind. Suddenly a loud, terror filled shriek filled the air.
"AHHHHHHHHHH!" Her blood chilling scream echoed down every hallway of the Titan Tower and pierced through Robin and Cyborg's ears as the door slid open in front of them. What they found, much to their surprise, was not Slade nor anyone else that didn't belong. It was a gigantic green spider, crawling on the ground after a terrified Starfire who was shooting at him with starbolts as she flew.
"Stop it! Beast Boy that is not funny!" she wailed. Beast Boy stopped and turned back into his human form, rolling with laughter.
"Hahaha, that was great!" he beamed until he saw the dark, vengeful expression on Starfire's face.
"Beast Boy, I am now going to injure you," she said simply and began chasing him around the room with her eyes glowing green and him squealing like a little girl. Raven watched them from the counter where she was still finishing off her sandwhich and the boys started laughing. Starfire stopped and turned to see Robin standing in the doorway.
"Hello Robin!" she smiled. Beast Boy took this chance to escape while his loving friend was distracted, but was caught when she turned her head straight to him. "Good bye Robin," she called without looking away from her prey. A green cheetah then shot across the room, followed by a girl Tamaranian. Cyborg and Robin laughed until their voices were hoarse and their faces hurt from smiling. Watching them Robin thought how much her happiness relieved his burdens and soothed him.
That night, while everyone was in bed, Robin tossed against his pillow. He'd laid down nearly three hours ago but couldn't go to sleep. His mind was too preoccupied. His mind, or his heart rather, was running over Starfire again and again. Finally he got up and went for a walk, hoping that it would clear his mind. But there was no running from the fact that Cyborg was right. He was inlove with the red haired beauty, madly head over heels in love with her. But would he tell her? He passed by the common room door and remembered waking up to her upset features. He had even made it worse when he told her why he'd managed to survive. He couldn't tell her. He couldn't take the risk of hurting her again. He walked by the training room and remembered her delicate whimpering...who gave her that crazy idea anyway?? Couldn't have been Raven, he thought as he walked past Raven's room. She's too level headed. He grinned at the idea. Calm, quiet Raven being Starfire's best friend. Starfire, the most emotional, excitable, loving, compassionate, beautiful, tenderhearted, heart wrenching person he'd ever met. With a sigh he surrendered. She was the only person now and ever for him...now if he could just go to sleep. Robin looked up and down the hall.
"Huh? Where am I?" he said aloud and looked around. Starfire's door stood on his right, closed tight. Figures...he was drawn to her...With another sigh Robin sat down in front of her door and stared at it as though any second he expected her to come out and snuggle into his arms. He wondered how he had ever gotten along without her touch. When he held her hand the other night, he'd been nervous yeah, but it felt right. He let his head fall back and his eye lids fall half shut thinking about it. That was when he heard it. Muffled sounds of distress and fear coming out of her room. It was as if deep within she was being tortured. He was on his feet faster than he realized and next to the door. "Starfire? Hey Star, you okay?" he asked.
"mm..nh-RObin..."she moaned, her voice streaked with fear.
"I'm coming Star...." he assured, knowing she couldn't hear him, as he over rode the locks in her door. It wasn't moving fast enough, he had to help her. What if.....SLADE....Robin backed away from Starfire's door and smashed the locks with his foot. Instantly he was granted access and went running to her bedside. But she wasn't in danger. She wasn't even being hurt. She was sleeping. She was deep within a dream, feet resting on her pillow and her head curled tightly in her blankets while her eyebrows furrowed with worry and she kept tossing against her mattress. Robin smiled to himself. Even in her most terrifying moment she was beautiful.
"Slade I asked you....NO!" Starfire yelped and started fighting her sheets violently. Robin decided this was a not so peaceful nightmare...especially if it involved Slade. Reaching a hand to her shoulder he shook her softly.
"Star, starfire! Wake up! It's a dream," he cried.Starfire was sitting bolt up right, eye to eye with him in less than a second. Her emerald eyes swelled with tears at seeing him and before he could register that she was awake she was wrapped up in his arms crying.
"Oh Robin, it fills my heart with relief to see you alive! He was killing you and I could not free you from his grasp. Oh I wish I had never seen Slade that night nor heard his voice in my ear! He could have killed you!" she whined, body jerking with sobs. Robin's weak grip on her tightened, holding her so close to his heart that he could smell her skin. Her sobs were a part of him, her pain ran in his veins. It took all his willpower not to join in on her tears for he had had that same nightmare, only in the opposite direction mere hours ago.
"Shh, Starfire, it's alright...you were only dreaming. You're awake now," he promised and hugged her tighter. Starfire's wet eyes blinked against his chest. She was in his arms, his strong protective arms. "I'm not hurt I swear, I'm alright...and I'm not going to let anything happen to you. Never," he vowed. Starfire sat up and gazed into the eyes of her rescuer. He was hurting...for her. God how he made her love him....how had he known she needed him anyway? Always there, always near...
"Robin...I am glad that you are here, but how I do not understand..."
"I was walking around when I heard you yelling," he explained, "I kinda...broke down the door," he added embarrassedly. Starfire looked over and sniffed. Sure enough the door was open and not moving. She blushed herself.
"You did that to save me Robin...you are the best human I will ever know, and you are far better than any tamaranian. Your mind solves so many problems and your heart helps you feel so much for others...you have put your life on the line for me and--" her hand reached up to the scabbing gash on his cheek with a memory of Slade looming over him. "I could not stand to lose you Robin, nor the friendship you bestow on me. No one can ever replace you in my heart...please, promise me that you will take better care of your being," she begged, staring into his eyes with a white hot intensity he'd never seen her have before. There was no smile on her face, no giggle in her eyes, only the raw vulnerable affection within her and the soft cushion of her fingertip on his cut.
"I'd rather you take care of me," he replied, never turning his gaze. He could see her jump with surprise, that cute way her eyes lit up with confusion, but he didn't move.
"What do you mean by that Robin?" Her heart was throbbing. He couldn't possibly mean what she thought, could he?
"I mean I love you Star... more than anything in this world and I would gladly give up my life a million times just to see you smile. You're always on my mind in some way and I can't fight it anymore. I'm inlove with you," he said with an explosion of emotion. His face, turned conviently away, was as bright red as her hair and getting brighter. Starfire moved her hand from his cheek to his hand that rested in his lap and gripped it tightly. She waited for him to turn his head and look at her. Her eyes were sparkling as though every star in the world had been captured there and held just for him.
"And I too am inlove with you Robin," she said happily. Robin smirked and squeezed her hand back. Finally, his mind was at an ease it had almost never reached before. She loved him. She, Starfire, loved him...he felt as though he'd had the obvious pointed out to him by his best friend in the world. They were inlove...he couldn't say it enough. A nervous laugh found it's way to her ears.
"Well if that's the case, there's something I've ALWAYS wanted to do," he said. She didn't have time to question as to what it was because she felt his hand on the small of her back as it pulled her forward and the warm embrace of his arm around her shoulders. Lastly, but most heavenly, she felt his lips pressed down hard against her own. They were soft and strong, guiding her into motions she had never made while his arms held her closer than she'd ever been held. She didn't know what to do, she was frozen against him. A deep humiliation was welling up inside her when she suddenly felt his tongue against her lips begging entrance. Her eyes drifted shut, it didn't matter if she was too stupid...he would tell her what to do. She released the tension inside her, basking in the attention he was showing her when she suddenly felt his lips stop and he pulled away from. Robin's face couldn't have been brighter if he'd colored it and he was twitching slightly from nerves.
"Why did you stop?" she asked innocently. Robin chuckled.
"I guess I'm nervous," he admited. Starfire smiled at him and then leapt, pushing her boy wonder to the bed, landing on top of him with a grin. Red hair dangled in his face while her breath warmed his face. The blood drained out of his cheeks when he felt her breasts against his chest and her nose brush the tip of his own. Taking what little he had taught her already Starfire claimed his lips as hers and hers alone, licking at his lips the same way he had. Surely that would cease his nervousness? She pulled back to check and saw him grinning bigger than he'd ever grinned. He was utterly happy and that pleased her most.
"Are you still nervous, dear Robin?" she asked innocently. Robin shook his head and reached a hand up through her hair to her neck, pulling her face lower. She wasn't expecting the sudden movement of the earth, but was pleasantly surprised to find herself beneath Robin when it stopped. He really wanted more room to move.
"Nope," he said and finally lowered his lips fiercely against hers. Starfire willingly accepted the wet force of his tongue into her mouth and the firm, but gentle touch of his hands.