A/N: My writer's block has floated away no thanks to my readers! ::glares at
readers menacingly:: Actually, most of my inspiration comes from my hilarious
classmates, who never fail to amuse me, thanks to y'all! You never know how
amusing an average high school can be until your friends and foes make complete
fools of themselves in P.E. But back to the point, I'll forgive you readers on
one condition, if you review my magazine. And if you were one of the 8 angels who
reviewed the first edition your personal thankyous are below.
Dreamer16- Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! You were my first reviewer, so you made me really happy! I'll get to your fics sometime this week, because I most definitely read and review my readers' stories. Thanks again!!!!!
Person within the beast- Yes I know! I am hilarious aren't I? Just kidding! HA! No actually, most of these articles come from incidents that happen at my boring little California High School, so I actually own very little of it. I'll be reading your story some time this week, so get ready for a long and beautiful review.
Stargirlr- Thanks so much for the review, and yes I am from India, but I live in the U.S. And here's the next issue you were asking for. I love your story, the You Complete ME one.
Snuffles2984- Request Remus is personally my favorite section to write as well, so I guess we have something in common, the only problem is that I'm running out of ideas and fast, so you know if you or your friends have any ideas, ::winks:: ::hints very vigorously::
ILOVEPADFOOTANDPRONGS- I review all the stories I like, and yours was especially good. Thanks so much for reviewing my story, you have no idea how much it means to me. Unless you do know….hmmmm…..if you do know that's very strange. Never mind me, thanks a lot!
Midnight3- Thanks so much for reviewing my story. I really enjoyed writing this so, hearing that you enjoyed it almost brings tears to my eyes. And the Sirius and the wallpaper idea actually came from my lunatic boyfriend. We are so strange that we are made for each other. Don't ask. Anyway, Thanks for reviewing and I hope you enjoy this issue.
Sullen Shadowhawk- Oh are your friends really starting a magazine? Could you possibly tell me the account, 'cause magazines are my favorite type of fics to read, and I haven't seen any magazines around for a very long time, thanks!
ANDREAandMICHELLE- Thanks so much, I've read your fics and they are awesome! And actually the only reason I'm continuing this is because of your review, it touched me. ::wipes tear from eyes::
Whew! ::wipes sweat from brow:: I only had eight of these reply thingies to do and it took forever! Imagine those people who get like hundreds of reviews! Now, I just have to finish typing the rest of the magazine! That won't take long, it's all written in my "handy dandy notebook!" You know what's ironic? It actually has Blue from the popular American sitcom, "Blue's Clues" on the cover. Sorry, I'm blabbering.
Disclaimer: I wish I owned Sirius Black or Remus Lupin, I could even settle for James Potter, sadly, they all belong to J.K. Rowling, as does Oliver Wood. This chapter is dedicated to all those fine men in life that one could never get unless they were a famous international actress that was drop-dead gorgeous and wore skimpy clothing. I however am nothing of the sort, therefore my wishes are confined to my dreams. OH JOHNNY DEPP! LET ME TAKE THE TIME TO PROFESS MY UNDYING LOVE TO YOU! Sorry, you don't have to read this anymore. I fully understand if all you normal people are scared of me, it's perfectly natural. Now, we can proceed to the magazine:
Harry lay staring at the ceiling, thinking back to all the father-son moments he had shared with his godfather, but now Sirius was gone. Harry sighed, he definitely needed something to take his mind off this for an hour or two, and he was almost wasting away. He got up and went over to his desk, rubbing the crick out of his neck, when some shiny paper caught his eye, it was the stack of magazines Remus had given him, well, it was better than nothing. He picked up the top issue and flipped it open to the first page and started to read.
Marauder Magazine Sirius SectionHey y'all, this is Sirius Black with all the latest news and views straight from Hogwarts, today we go deep into the unknown, a place so mysterious, that no kid has even thought of visiting it before. That may be partially due to the fact that most students don't know we have one, but let's just ignore that. Yes, I'm talking about the Staff Lounge; let's take a looksie shall we? As we push open the creaky, wooden door we see a furry, neon green couch, with matching maroon feather-covered pillows. In the corner is a fancy baby blue boudoir with beautiful engravings around the side in white, It's a BOY! Inside this armoire, on the top shelf we have the latest hair-care products, a comb with only 3 teeth left, a shampoo bottle with fuzzy yellow mold growing atop it and a tartan hair net. Hanging on the rack is a set of midnight blue robes, some size 84, magenta leather pants, and a very sexy red satin, cocktail dress, I wonder who that belongs to! Let's move to the desk shall we? Atop it we see, tests and homework assignments that have yet to be corrected by the teachers, some of them bearing suspicious lavender stains, others bearing the letter "T" in large red letters underneath the table however, we see accumulated piles of Drooble's Best Blowing Gum. To top it all off, the walls are apricot with orange crown-molding, if you ask me, this room could use some pink-pony wallpaper, and I will most probably appeal to the teachers with this suggestion, if they don't agree, I will personally put it up myself, other than that, there you have it, the staff room.
If you have any news or views, slip them under the door to the Room of Requirement
Remus RequestDear Remus,
What are Care Bears? We need to research them for our muggle studies class and I have no idea what they are. Can you help me?
-Mugglely Challenged
Dear Mugglely Challenged,
Care Bears sound like teddy bears, teddy bears are fuzzy, Sirius knows about fuzzy things, ask him. Quit bothering me!
-Remus
Dear Remus,
My boxers are missing, and at the moment I'm feeling quite awkward, as the dorm is quite drafty and it's feeling quite breezy down there. What do I do? Also, some girl keeps asking me about fuzzy care bears, HELP!
-Boxerless Padfoot
Dear Boxerless Padfoot,
That was much more information than I needed to know, and the house elves have stolen your boxers because you keep lacing their personal water supply with butterbeer. Stop lacing their water, you get your boxers back, it's really quite simple. As for that girl, good for her, someone needs to start annoying you.
-Remus
Dear Remus,
Last week it was the full moon and I saw the strangest sight when I looked out the window during my midnight full moon celebration. There was a stag, a big black dog, a rat, and what seemed to be a werewolf, they were marauding about the grounds as if they owned the place! Do you think I'm hallucinating?
-Confused
Dear Confused,
First of all, you used very interesting word-choice on the 20th word in your second sentence, now where exactly did you get that word? Second, why are you celebrating the full moon? Third, why are you poking your nose into four poor animals' business. And fourth, there is nothing to worry about, you are definitely hallucinating, nothing a simple trip down to St. Mungo's won't cure.
-Remus
Are you having problems? Remus has all the practical answers and solutions. Just slip your dilemmas under the door to the Room of Requirement, and remember, no question is too stupid!
Swings and Flings with Fiona GarblesHello all! This is Fiona Garbles with breaking news for all you females (and disturbed males) out there! Sirius Black, the heartthrob of Gryffindor, yes that gorgeous hunk is free. If you want to attempt to hook up, you'll find him in the Staff Lounge redecorating the walls. I think he said something about pink ponies.
Alice and Frank Longbottom are going into their 4th week of dating as of three weeks from now, and the Weaslys have finally decided on the name for their first child. After long deliberation, they have agreed on Bill, best wishes from Gryffindor to the Weaslys. Now, to the couple with the longest standing hate-hate relationship, Lily and James. This morning Lily hexed poor James right to the hospital wing when he allegedly slipped his arm around her waist, bad luck James, but we hope things will look up in the future.
Fun Extras:
A/N: Some of these extras are not just created for the fic, I've clearly marked the ones you guys can participate in with asterix, these are actual extras, which you can do if you want, especially the insta-poll, the contest, and the submit your ideas segment. I would really appreciate it. You guys can also give me questions for Request Remus as well, that would also be greatly cherished. Now I'll stop jabbering and continue.
Prank #237 from The Big Book of Marauding Pranks:
This week's prank is one of our personal favorites. It causes the enemy (coughslytherinscough) to profess their feelings whenever they feel a really strong emotion, but get this, it's done in a shrill opera, which is sure to get on everyone's nerves. To ensure a successful prank, pay seven sickles to us, the Marauders and guarantee a sure-fire prank played on that special someone who just gets on your nerves.
*Insta-Poll*
Which one of the following would you most like to see Sirius obsessed with?
a) that hissing noise that occurs when you open a soda can
b) that glug, glug, glug noise that happens when you drain the tub
c) that screechy noise that a beginning violin player makes
d) Britney Spears
e) Bubbles
f) Other (specify exactly what when you review)
Couple of the Week By: Smartarse
This week it's a tie between the long-standing relationship of Remus Lupin and Faran Carries, and the newly found love between Frank and Alice Longbottom, both relationships are perfectly balanced and there hasn't been a single fight between the two couples. I wonder how long these perfect affiliations will last this time. Do I hear 1 galleon?
*Contest of the Week*
In this week's edition of the Marauder Magazine, I mentioned a hairnet in one of the sections. Who does this hairnet belong to and why do you say that? This isn't some random guessing question, it does belong to a specific teacher, and the same hairnet is mentioned in the Prisoner of Azkaban I think. The winner of the contest, the first person to get the correct answer, will get to answer the Request Remus questions and even make up their own questions, we'll coordinate through email. They will also get featured as Sirius' fling of the week. Have Fun!
Daily Forecast By: Astromagician
We predict a shower of meteors at precisely 7:00 P.M. it should be visible from the astronomy tower. And for now, skies are gray, the weather is bland, it's another boring day in the wizarding world.
*Complaints? Comments? Ideas? Suggestions?*
Review them to padfoot4eva123, or email her at happybubbleblossom123@yahoo.com Happy Reading!!!!!!
Harry smiled, this would definitely keep him occupied for a while, he tossed the magazine back onto the desk and switched off the light. He'd be able to sleep for the first time in weeks.
A/N: So how was it? I hope it didn't disappoint you guys, 'cause that's the last thing I want to do. But if I did, tell me, and include how I can make it better. I welcome flames, I'm a pyromaniac. HA! Never mind my stupid puns. Anyway, see that button down there? Click on it please? I beg of you!