I own tie-dye socks. I don't own the Harry Potter characters. Whoever owns the rights to the Buffy quotation I used owns the Buffy quotation I used. It's the one about the rodent man.
Thanks to my beta and jarvey, Natalie.
I like reviews.
Italics denote thoughts
That being said:
*****
"So Astrid, how have your classes been?" Hermione asked the small girl seated on the couch next to her. Harry, Ron, Fred, George and Ginny had just returned from Quidditch practice and were leaping around the room in a very exuberant recount of some of the better moments of practice.
"Boring, really. Potions drives me crazy. I really don't like professor Snape. Herbology seems just about pointless. Transfiguration and Charms are alright."
"What about Defense and History of Magic?" Hermione asked.
"I would like to find the person responsible for the unfinished business that didn't let Professor Binns die and kill them with my bare hands," Astrid said through gritted teeth.
"Astrid, no offense, but I don't think you'd really be able to kill anyone with your bare hands," Hermione laughed. Astrid looked up at Hermione, raised her left eyebrow and smirked in an unnervingly Draco-esque way. Hermione put her hand over Astrid's eyes.
"Stop that!" she commanded, "You look like Malfoy."
"I'M MELTING!!" Astrid squealed and writhed off of the couch onto the floor where she curled into a little ball and trembled violently.
"Astrid, what are you doing?" Harry asked. He and Ron looked over the back of the couch to the little girl in the floor.
"I'm melting," Astrid replied happily. She looked up from her "melting" and smiled sweetly at the two boys.
"Why?" Ron asked.
"Hermione said I looked like Draco and then she clamped her hand over my eyes so I figured this would be a very Draco-like way to respond to being touched by someone he considers inferior," Astrid explained. Harry and Hermione both erupted with laughter, while Ron vaulted over the back of the couch and knelt next to Astrid.
"You're not doing it right," he insisted.
"I'm not?" Astrid asked, looking up at the youngest Weasley boy. Harry and Hermione calmed their laughter and watched Ron and Astrid with interest.
"No. First stand up," Ron instructed. Astrid uncurled herself from the floor and stood up.
"Now you need the… the…." Ron searched for a way to describe the look Draco usually wore. Astrid contorted her small face into a very Draco-ish look.
"Like this?" Astrid asked. Ron took a look at the girl and then shuddered.
"Yes, just like that," He laughed. Astrid shot him a smirk Draco himself would have been proud of.
"Okay, now put your hand to your face like you've just been slapped," Ron instructed.
"You slapped Draco?" Astrid asked, looking at Hermione incredulously.
"Yes," Hermione replied, turning bright red.
"GO HERMIONE!" Astrid squealed. She jumped straight up in the air and clapped her hands several times as she squealed.
"The day Draco Malfoy does that, I will eat my broomstick," Harry said.
"What, say 'go Hermione'?" Ron asked.
"Or the jump, squeal, clap bit?" Hermione added.
"Both." Harry and Astrid both laughed.
"Alright Astrid, so you need the look and the shocked expression," Ron said. Astrid instantly re-contorted her face and placed a pale hand on her equally pale face.
"You need to sneer more," Harry advised.
"And your eyes need to be wider," Hermione added. Astrid heeded their instructions before dropping the Draco act all together.
"I thought of something!" she exclaimed. She pulled her wand from her pocket and ducked behind an overstuffed chair. Harry, Ron, and Hermione all exchanged a quizzical look, but before they could voice their questions, Astrid emerged from her hiding place. She had charmed her hair into a gelled-back mass, like Draco favored. She instantly went back into her Draco impersonation.
"Better?" She asked after a moment. Harry, Hermione, and Ron had all collapsed into uncontrollable laughter.
"Whoa, who shrunk Malfoy and let him into our common room?" Fred asked as he walked up behind the sofa Hermione and Harry were sitting on. He easily jumped over it and slid in between Harry and Hermione.
"It's just me," Astrid insisted. She pulled out her wand and muttered the counter charm, making her hair return to normal.
"You do a quite good impression of Malfoy," Fred commended her. She smiled sweetly at him.
"Thank you," she replied, "I would hope so. I have lived with him all of my life."
"Poor girl," George muttered. He plopped down on the couch on the other side of Hermione. Both he and Fred wrapped their arms around her shoulders.
"Okay boys, no playing Make Hermione Try to Guess Which Twin is Fred," Hermione scolded. Both of the twins laughed and Hermione just rolled her eyes.
"May I have your attention please," a familiar, albeit out of place, voice called from the portrait hole. Everyone in the common room turned to look at Professor McGonagall, who had just stepped through the entrance into the room. Harry, Ron and Hermione all exchanged a nervous glance. McGonagall had only been in common room a handful of times previously, and never for a positive reason.
"After careful deliberation, I have decided on this years Quidditch captain," McGonagall announced. Instantly, the Quidditch team, Astrid, and Hermione paid more attention to McGonagall while everyone else went back to their previous activities.
"Congratulations Harry!" Fred exclaimed, before McGonagall could make her announcement.
"Mr. Weasley, you're right," McGonagall said. Harry turned bright red and Ron clapped him on his back.
"Mr. Potter has many of the qualities desirable in a captain," McGonagall continued, "However, he will not be the captain this year." Fifteen open mouths and thirty wide eyes met her announcement.
"It has been brought to my attention that there are a couple more likely candidates that need a bit of responsibility," McGonagall explained.
"CONGRATULATIONS ALICIA!" Fred cried.
"Thanks Weasley, but I'm not sure I need anymore responsibility," Alicia laughed.
"Unlike someone we know," muttered Katie.
"I heard that Katie Bell!" Fred insisted.
"It seems to me, Mr. Weasley, that you should take lessons on guessing from Miss Bell."
"You mean I'm Quidditch captain?" Fred asked. His eyes widened and his jaw dropped even farther. George immediately stared at his shoes.
"No," McGonagall replied, "If you could be quiet for a moment I could explain all of this." Hermione jerked an elbow into Fred's ribs. He rubbed the spot she hit him and looked at her with a pout only rivaled by a two year old in a toy store. She leaned over and placed her head softly on his shoulder. He rested his cheek on the top of her head.
"Now. The Quidditch Captain for this years house team will be the Weasley twins!" McGonagall cried. George looked over at Fred. Fred jerked his head straight up and stared directly at George.
"We're the captain!" George cried.
"OH NO!" Angelina cried. She dropped into the chair Astrid had hid behind with her head in her hands.
"Professor McGonagall, with all due respect, I don't think you can do this to us," Ron joked.
"She can!" George cried.
"And she did!" Fred added. McGonagall smiled at both of them.
"I'll be leaving you all to your celebrations now. Don't let it get out of hand, as you all have classes tomorrow," she said. With that, she turned and climbed back out of the portrait hole.
"We're captain," Fred echoed George's statement at a slightly lower volume.
"Yes you are," Hermione replied, "Congratulations." She looked up and smiled at Fred. Fred flashed a little half-smile in her direction. Then, before she could do anything, he used the arm wrapped around her shoulders to turn her to face him. Then he lowered his lips to hers. She pulled back a bit at his initial touch, but quickly laced her fingers through his short red hair and deepened the kiss.
"Can we take points off for that?" Ron asked Harry, pointing at Fred and Hermione.
"I think so," Harry replied. Hermione pulled away from Fred and glared at her friends.
"You take points off, you can say goodbye to the Inv- to the you-know-what that is so useful in pulling pranks," she threatened viciously.
"Touché!" Harry cried. He jumped back from Hermione and threw his hands up in mock defeat. George and Angelina had taken a page out of Fred and Hermione's book and were standing off to the side "celebrating." Katie, Alicia and Ginny were gathered in a quiet discussion on exactly what having Weasley twins for a captain would mean. Hermione looked up at Fred and smiled again. He dropped a soft kiss on her forehead. Seamus, Dean and Neville had gone back to their game of Exploding Snap. Ron and Harry tried to pull Fred into another replay of some of the more exciting moments from practice in celebration of the captain announcement. No one really noticed Astrid sinking back into the overstuffed chair. She pulled her knees to her chest and wrapped her arms around them. Her knees provided a convenient rest for her chin and she stared wistfully into the fire, trying to ignore the twins' celebration.
*****
"Goodnight Hermione, Congratulations again, Fred," Harry said.
"Yeah," Ron added. Hermione looked up from her conversation with Fred to her two best friends. She and Fred had been so absorbed in their conversation that they hadn't noticed the common room emptying.
"Goodnight you guys," she said. She quickly scanned the common room to see who else was still up. It was empty. Harry shot Hermione a mischievous smile while Ron glared at Fred. Then both boys took off towards their dorm, taking the steps two at a time.
"So, Miss Granger," Fred said, almost lazily.
"Yes Mr. Weasley?" Hermione asked innocently. Fred draped his arm around her shoulder and leaned back on the couch. Hermione dropped her head lightly onto his shoulder. Both of them stared into the dying embers of the fire, immersed in their own thoughts.
"I can't believe I'm sitting here with Fred Weasley!" Hermione thought. She was still trying to register the fact that Fred had become more than Ron's goofy older brother to her. Besides being undeniably sweet, she had found that Fred was a startlingly good conversationalist. Beneath his prankster attitude, Fred was actually intelligent and the two had become fond of just sitting in a corner of the common room and talking. He had walked her to most of her classes ever since the episode at potions almost a week before hand. He had also left a rose at her typical spot at the Gryffindor table Friday at dinner, exactly a week after their shared dances.
Fred leaned his head over and rested his cheek on Hermione's. He inhaled deeply and the scent of her shampoo hit him full force. "STRAWBERRIES!" He chuckled to himself into her hair. Hermione was undeniably the most unique girl he'd ever dated. He had gone for the cute girls, the athletic girls, and even, during the summer between fifth and sixth years, a fellow prankster, but never the bookworm. He was personally glad he finally had given in and decided to pursue whatever he had with Hermione. Every sweet gesture he had made towards her had been accepted with a child-like innocence and happiness he hadn't seen in the other girls he had dated, and he liked that.
"That kiss!" Hermione thought. True, the kiss she shared with Fred hadn't been her first. It had been their first, but not her first. It had definitely been great. The times she had kissed Victor, his nose had gotten in the way. Fred, however, was another story. His kiss had been perfect. Light, smooth, and cool, just the way a kiss should be, with no noses in the way.
Fred's arm was falling asleep because of the pressure Hermione had on it. He shifted to try to alleviate some of the tingling sensation, to no avail. Hermione became vaguely aware of him moving, so she sat up and turned to look at him.
"Are you okay?" she asked.
"Yeah," Fred said. He stretched out lazily on the couch, his feet hanging off of one end and his head resting on pillows on the other. Hermione smiled sweetly at him before lying down on her side next to him with her back to him. She rested her head on a pillow next to his. He pillowed his cheek on the top of her head. She pulled her left hand up between her cheek and the pillow. He slipped his right hand over her side and rested it right on her stomach. She placed her hand over his and laced her fingers through his. He inhaled deeply. "STRAWBERRIES!"
"Hey Hermione?" Fred asked.
"Yes?" Hermione replied.
"I like you." Hermione was caught off guard by Fred's statement.
"I like you too," Hermione replied. Fred mentally kicked himself for being so blunt and not nearly as suave as he had been when he'd been practicing with George. He laughed to himself a little.
"What so funny?" she asked. He dropped a kiss on her cheek, just in front of her ear. "Nothing."
"Oh," she replied. Her eyes fluttered closed.
"Hermione?" Fred asked again.
"Yeah?" She didn't open her eyes.
"Will you be my girlfriend?" Fred asked. Hermione's eyes flew open.
"Yes," she replied sweetly. Her face turned bright red. Fred dropped another kiss on her cheek. She rolled over to lie on her back so she could see him. He instantly dropped a kiss on her lips. "STRAWBERRIES!"
"We should go upstairs now," he said, before dropping another kiss on her lips.
"We should," Hermione agreed. He kissed her again.
"I don't want to," he said. She leaned up for the kiss this time.
"Neither do I, but we've got class tomorrow," she said. Their final kiss of the night was a little longer.
"Goodnight," Fred said. He eased himself over Hermione and off of the couch.
"Night," Hermione replied. Fred headed off towards the seventh year boys dorm. Hermione pulled the Gryffindor blanket from the back of the couch and wrapped herself in it. The fire finally died out, but she didn't bother relighting it. She was too wrapped up in the fact that she finally had an official boyfriend. She was so wrapped up, in fact, that she didn't hear the door on the girls' side of the tower creak open and the small footsteps on the stairs.
"Hermione?" Astrid asked, peering around the edge of the couch. Hermione looked up at the little girl, quite startled.
"What's wrong?" Hermione asked. Astrid looked upset.
"I had a bad dream," Astrid said. Hermione sat up and muttered a spell to make a fire spring up in the fireplace. She pulled Astrid over to sit next to her.
"What was it about?" Hermione asked.
"Lucius, and Draco," Astrid said. She stared into the purple flames of the fire.
"Lucius and Draco?" Hermione questioned.
"Yeah," Astrid replied. Hermione didn't press the subject. She knew Astrid would talk when she was ready.
"You know Barrett died because of Lucius and Draco," Astrid stated matter of factly. She shivered a little under her cloak. Hermione opened her blanket and threw a corner of it around Astrid.
"No, I didn't know that."
"Voldemort killed Barrett." Astrid said. Her gaze still hadn't broken from the fire.
"She said you died when you were six. He fell when I was a year old. I'm four years older than you. How did he manage to kill her?" Hermione asked.
"When I was six, you and Draco would have been ten, correct?" Astrid asked. She continued before Hermione could do the math. "I know you all were ten, because I remember it all too clearly. It was actually the summer before Draco began his first year, meaning Voldey had already inhabited Quirrell's body. So in all actuality, Quirrell was the one who killed Barrett, but he was acting under Voldemort's influence."
"Of course," said Hermione. She shivered at the thought of Harry facing Voldemort alone when they had only been first years.
"I- I don't think I can tell you anymore. Despite the fact that I hate him passionately, Lucius is still my father," Astrid said. A distraught look crossed her face and tears welled in her eyes. Hermione wrapped her arm around the smaller girls shoulders.
"It's alright, Astrid, I understand." Hermione attempted to comfort her.
"No, you don't. You couldn't. How could you understand what its like to lie awake at night listening to your oldest brother sob because your father has placed him under Cruciatus till he was almost dead. Listening to your own twin make plans for his reign after Voldemort falls. Listening to your mother explaining to your little sister for the millionth time why Barrett had to die, and knowing that she didn't have to at all?" Astrid asked. Tears flowed down her face, leaving salty paths illuminated in the firelight.
"Cruciatus? Really?" Hermione asked quietly. She knew Draco's life at home wasn't exactly what anyone could call pleasant, but she had never imagined he'd gone through the Cruciatus curse.
"Of course. Lucius believes in tough love," Astrid said. "I hate my brother, I really do. Don't feel sorry for him at all, because he really is an arse. He is weak and quite spineless, and loves nothing more than to do Lucius's bidding."
"Oh don't worry, I'd figured that out a long time ago," Hermione almost laughed.
"No, it's really a lot worse than I can explain. You'll find out in due time I suppose," Astrid cried. Hermione used the edge of the blanket to wipe away a few of Astrid's tears.
"Your twin plotting his reign after Voldemort falls?" Hermione queried.
"You'll find out in due time," Astrid repeated. Hermione tightened her grip on the smaller girls shoulders and let her cry.
*****
"Hermione," a soft voice right near Hermione's head whispered. Startled, Hermione sat straight up. She felt a soft hand on her shoulder and looked up into the face of her boyfriend.
"What are you doing in my room?" She asked dumbly.
"You and Astrid fell asleep in the common room," Fred explained. The previous nights events flashed back to Hermione and she looked down to where Astrid had been sitting. She wasn't sitting there anymore.
"Where's Astrid? And what are you doing up?" She asked.
"I already carried Astrid up to her bed, and I'm up because I couldn't sleep and was going to go down to the kitchens to get something to drink," Fred said, "but not before I do this." He placed one strong arm across her back and looped the other under her knees. He picked her straight up off of the couch. She wrapped her arms around his neck and leaned her head on his shoulder. He easily carried her up to her dorm room and placed her softly on her bed.
"Goodnight," he whispered, dropping a kiss on her forehead, then her nose, and lastly her lips.
"Goodnight," she replied before she rolled over to face the wall and gathered the blankets to her chin. Fred quietly closed the hangings around her bed and slipped out of her room so he wouldn't wake Lavender and Parvati.
*****
"Hermione, hurry up! We're going to be late for breakfast!" Harry called up the stairs to the girls' dorm. Hermione took one last look at herself in the mirror. Her hair was definitely bushier and she had dark circles under her eyes due to the very small amount of sleep she had gotten the night before, but she didn't really care. She grabbed her bag, slung it over her shoulder and ran from the room and down the stairs. Harry, Ron and Ginny were already waiting for her.
"Where are Astrid and the twins?" she asked.
"Astrid has already gone down to breakfast, and no one has seen Fred and George this morning, so who knows what they're up to," Ron replied. Hermione smiled broadly at her three friends.
"What happened between you and Fred last night?" Ginny immediately recognized the stupid look on Hermione's face as boy-induced. She wore the same expression most every time she thought about, got another letter from, talked to, or was with Braeden. Hermione's smile, if anything, grew. Ron and Harry started towards the portrait hole. Ginny rolled her eyes at the boys. She and Hermione had established that if the boys weren't thinking about Quidditch then they were thinking about girls, and if not about girls, then about food.
"So what did my brother manage to do last night?" Ginny asked again.
"Your brother is now officially my boyfriend," Hermione replied, smiling sweetly at Ginny.
"Oh my goodness Hermione that's wonderful!" Ginny squealed. She jumped straight up in the air and clapped her hands together several times as she squealed.
"Whoa girl, you're acting like Astrid," Hermione laughed.
"Sorry," Ginny said, "It's just that I'm excited my brother has finally gotten his act together."
"Me too," Hermione laughed.
"Hey, if you marry Fred then you and I will be sisters!" Ginny squealed.
"Gin, don't get ahead of yourself there. Fred and I haven't even been together for a full day," Hermione reminded her friend.
"I can dream, can't I?" Ginny asked. Before Hermione could reply, she continued rambling. "Truth be told, I always suspected you would end up with Ron, but George told me what happened between the two of you the first night we were back. I was slightly surprised."
"What about Ron?" Ron asked. He stopped dead in his tracks and turned to look at the two girls.
"Fred and Hermione are finally official!" Ginny squealed.
"Hermione, that's great!" Harry cried. He ran back and threw his arms around his friend.
"Yeah, that's great, but what does that have to do with Ron?" Ron asked again.
"Nothing," Ginny replied. She grabbed her brother by his elbow and started pulling him towards the Great Hall. Harry and Hermione hurried close behind them.
"So what does that have to do with Ron?" Harry asked quietly.
"She was just telling me how she'd always expected me and Ron to get together, rather than me and Fred," Hermione whispered. Harry caught the door of the Great Hall from Ginny and held it open to allow Hermione through. Fred and George already occupied their usual seats at the table. Astrid sat alone at the relatively empty end of the table closest to the head table. Harry, Ron and Ginny all took seats across from the twins. Hermione sat at the seat directly between them. A single red rose lay across her plate. At the sight of it, she turned a planted a kiss squarely on Fred's cheek.
"Uh, Hermione?" Fred asked.
"Yeah?" Hermione replied.
"I'm George, that one's Fred," Fred replied.
"Fredrick Bayard Weasley!" Ron, Ginny and George all shouted. Fred's ears went red and he looked down at his plate.
"Not funny, Fred," Hermione said, slapping him playfully on his shoulder.
"Where is Astrid?" Ron asked.
"Down there," George said, pointing to where the small girl sat, alone.
"So the search for friends her age continues," Ginny mused.
"Evidently," Harry laughed. The previous nights conversation flashed back to Hermione.
"Guys, I need to talk to you two later," she insisted. Harry and Ron both looked at her. She nodded in Astrid's direction. Ron looked down at their younger friend and Harry looked at Hermione with a raised eyebrow. Then he flashed a very pointed look in the direction of the Slytherin table. Hermione nodded as she wiped her mouth on a napkin. Harry nodded too, understanding what their unspoken conversation had told them.
"So when is our first Quidditch practice, captain?" Ron asked his brothers.
"Tonight," Fred and George replied at the same time.
%%%%%
"I'm not sitting next to the Malfoy," Karey Finnegan declared, glaring at Astrid, "Evelyn you sit next to her."
"Make me," Evelyn Creevey squeaked.
"I'm not going to," Madeline O'Conner insisted. She looked down the end of her nose at Astrid. Astrid sat in her seat at the Gryffindor table and calmly munched on her eggs and bacon, trying to look completely uninterested in what the other first years were saying.
"I might get sick if I sit next to the Malfoy," Hailey cried. Astrid looked calmly up at the girls.
"I don't bite," She smiled sweetly and then looked back to her food. "Often" she added as almost an afterthought.
"Hey Astrid, how's it going?" A small boy with blonde hair asked as he took the seat next to Astrid at the table.
"It's going, Dennis. These gits think I've got some sort of disease and they won't sit down," Astrid told the one person younger than Ginny Weasley who had voluntarily talked to her so far. She glanced in the first year girls' direction. Dennis looked at them also.
"Evelyn Nicole Creevey! I am ashamed of you! You've lived with Colin Creevey all of your life and you can't even be nice to Astrid? She's way more normal than Colin!" Dennis exclaimed. Evelyn turned bright red and instantly sat down in a seat. Her companions followed suit, as Dennis had solved the problem of who was going to sit next to Astrid.
"Geeze, Evie, your brother is mean!" Karey hissed under her breath.
"Nah. Dennis is usually pretty cool. Colin is a little odd though," Evelyn laughed. Dennis glared at her and she silenced her conversation.
%%%%%
"Hey lookit, Astrid's making a friend," Ron said. He pointed down the table to where Astrid and Dennis were consumed in conversation. Harry, Hermione, Fred, George and Ginny all turned to look at the two.
"Aww how cute," Hermione gushed.
"Ooh wait, this is the part where you go into over-protective big brother mode and threaten to chop out his pancreas with a spork, right?" Ginny asked Ron. Ron looked at his little sister with a repulsed look on his face.
"Why would I do that?" he asked.
"Its' what you've done to every guy that's ever gotten close to me," Ginny said.
"And me," Hermione added.
"Actually, he didn't threaten to chop my pancreas out," Fred quipped. He had turned slightly green at the thought of Ron's actual threat.
"Malfoy would kill us all if I stood up for his little sister any more than I already have," Ron explained.
"You're right," Harry said.
"For once," George muttered.
"What was that?" Ron asked.
"Nothing," George mumbled more to his toast than to Ron.
"We've got Care of Magical Creatures first this morning," Hermione grumbled. Fred carefully laced his fingers through hers.
"I've got Divination first," he said.
"I know," Hermione replied.
"So I'll see you at lunch?" Fred asked.
"Of course," Hermione said. Fred leaned over and dropped a kiss on her cheek and then on her forehead.
"Bye," he said.
"See you," Hermione replied. Fred stood up and headed out of the Great Hall. George followed him, still gnawing on a piece of toast.
"Hagrid's?" Harry asked, as more of a statement than a question.
"Hagrid's," agreed Ron.
%%%%%
"Save me a seat at lunch, will you?" Dennis asked. The remains of his breakfast disappeared from his gold plate.
"Sure," Astrid replied with a small smile.
"Well, I've got to run, Snape will eat me if I'm late for class," Dennis said. He grabbed his bag and turned to leave the great hall.
"Quite the contrary, Mr. Creevey," came Snape's icy voice, "I do not make a practice of cannibalism. 10 points from Gryffindor." Dennis made a small "eep" sound in the back of his throat and looked at Astrid, wide-eyed. Astrid instantly looked down to her half eaten breakfast and tried to suppress a laugh.
*****
"What do you think we're studying today?" Ron asked. The three friends were standing outside of Hagrid's hut waiting for their class to start.
"Erumpents," Neville guessed.
"What?" Ron and Harry both asked.
"Its one of the few hairy-scary creatures Hagrid hasn't sprung on us," Neville replied, logically.
"Unless he's been crossbreeding even scarier things again," Seamus shuddered.
"I think he learned his lesson with the Skrewts," Dean said.
"Correction," Hermione replied, "you hope he learned his lesson with the Skrewts."
"Something to that effect," Dean rolled his eyes down at Hermione.
"Nifflers would be fun," Ron said.
"You just want more chocolate," Harry chided. Ron scowled at him.
"Have you been taking lessons from Astrid?" Hermione asked. She and Harry both laughed. Ron continued to scowl at them both.
"You're just not quite as good as she is," Harry laughed.
"Of course not, I haven't lived with the great git all of my life. Thank goodness," Ron dropped his scowl and smiled.
"What was that about my sister, mudblood?" Malfoy asked from just behind the Gryffindor fifth years. Hermione turned coolly to face Malfoy.
"Attention, class!" Hagrid called, emerging from his hut with a bucket in his hand. Hermione turned away from Malfoy, and Malfoy and his two goons went to join the rest of the Slytherin fifth years.
"Terday, ye'll be studyin' Jarveys," Hagrid said, "So who can tell me what a Jarvey is?" Hermione's hand, as usual, shot into the air.
"Hermione?" Hagrid asked.
"A Jarvey is an animal that closely resembles a ferret, only larger. They have the power of speech, but only speak rude or insulting phrases," Hermione answered.
"Absolutely right," Hagrid said, beaming at Hermione from under his beard. Harry and Ron both began coughing.
"All right boys?" Hagrid asked. They both wiped their mouths and nodded at him. Everyone standing around them had to stifle their laughter, as the boys' coughing had sounded suspiciously like "Malfoy!"
"Right then. I've got the Jarveys around back, so if yeh'll split yerselves in ta groups of three we'll go back there and meet 'em," Hagrid said. Hermione looked at Ron and Harry, who were both looking back at her.
"Hey guys, can I be with you?" they heard Lavender ask Dean and Seamus.
"Sure," they agreed, and Neville looked hopefully at Parvati, who nodded in acceptance.
"Um, Parvati is it?" an unfamiliar male voice asked. All of the Gryffindors turned to face Blaise Zabini.
"Yes," Parvati replied coldly.
"Could I be with you and Neville?" Blaise asked.
"Sure," Parvati agreed, albeit rather uneasily.
"Thanks. I didn't particularly want to deal with Karen and Taylor," Blaise confided. He glanced back over his shoulder to the two fuming girls. Parvati laughed nervously and Neville looked absolutely petrified at the though of willingly working with a Slytherin.
"Alright then, follow me," Hagrid instructed. The fifth year Gryffindors and Slytherins followed Hagrid around the edge of the hut into the pumpkin patch.
"Each group chose a jarvey and spend the period talking to it." Hermione pulled Ron and Harry over to a jarvey tethered to the farthest post on the fence.
"Oi Hermione, that'n is nasty."
"Who are you calling nasty you overgrow oaf?" the jarvey yelled. Hermione looked at Ron and Harry and rolled her eyes.
"What do you three maggots want?" the jarvey asked as the three friends approached.
"You smell like GOAT CHEESE!" A jarvey from across the field screeched. The three friends instantly turned to see who the insult was direct at. Malfoy stood with his arms crossed defiantly across his chest, glaring at the furry little animal. Harry, Hermione and Ron all erupted in laughter at the look on Malfoy's face.
"So what did you want to talk to us about?" Harry asked.
"Why would she want to talk to you, scar face?" the jarvey asked.
"Shove off," Ron commanded. The jarvey looked particularly offended.
"Make me you big-eared freckled freak," the jarvey commanded. Ron pulled out his wand and pointed it at the animal.
"I'll be quiet if you'll put the wand away," the jarvey offered. Ron repocketed his wand.
"Psych!" the jarvey cried.
"Where are you from?" Hermione asked the jarvey.
"What's it to you, frizz-head?' the jarvey asked. Hermione rolled her eyes and put her back to the jarvey.
"So what did you want to talk to us about?" Harry repeated.
"MUDBLOOD!" Malfoy's jarvey cried. Hermione, Harry, and Ron almost fell over because they turned around so fast to see Malfoy's reaction. He had both hands wrapped around the jarvey's neck. Crabbe and Goyle were trying to pull him away from it.
"Ferrety one, he is," the jarvey laughed.
"Who, the other jarvey?" Hermione asked.
"No, the blond baboon choking my brother," the jarvey said.
"Your brother?" Harry asked.
"Yes. My brother. Moron," the jarvey spat. Ron turned around and glared at the jarvey.
"Is there anything you would particularly like to eat?" Harry asked the jarvey.
"A garden gnome might be tasty," the jarvey admitted.
"If you'll randomly scream an insult every minute or so to make it look like we're talking to you, I'll get you a garden gnome brought down here before dinner tonight," Harry promised.
"Make it three," the jarvey said.
"No problem," Harry replied.
"Okay, so what did you want to talk to us about?" Ron asked Hermione. Hermione sat down on the grass next to the jarvey.
"WHACK JOB!" the jarvey cried. Ron and Harry sank down next to her.
"I had a conversation with Astrid last night," Hermione began.
"I thought you were talking to Fred," Ron interrupted.
"Fred went upstairs and I was sitting in the common room for a few more minutes when Astrid came downstairs because she had had a bad dream," Hermione explained.
"YELLOW-BELLIED SAP SUCKER!"
"What was it about?" Harry asked, casting an annoyed glance in the jarvey's direction.
"All she said was Lucius and Draco," Hermione replied.
"Lucius and Draco?' Ron queried.
"Yes. She didn't offer any more detail," Hermione said.
"NASTY LITTLE HORRID BIGOTED RODENT MAN!"
"Did she say anything else interesting?" Harry asked.
"Evidently Barrett was killed by Quirrell when Voldemort was inhabiting Quirrell's body," Hermione said, raising her eyebrows mysteriously at the boys.
"Really?" Harry asked.
"Who is Barrett again?" Ron questioned.
"SNOTTY MIDGET OF A RAT BASTARD!"
"Barrett is the mysterious baby sister that got killed when she was six months old," Hermione explained.
"How old was Astrid when the baby got killed?" Harry asked.
"It seems that she was six, almost seven," Hermione replied.
"Which would have made Draco," began Ron.
"Ten, almost eleven," Hermione answered before he could finish asking his question.
"CAT BARF-SCENTED FLOBBERWORM!"
"Did she say anything else interesting?" Harry asked.
"I believe the most intriguing bit of everything she said was a mention of Keiran having a reign after Voldemort," Hermione said.
"What?" Harry asked.
"Does that mean Voldemort has a heir?' Ron asked.
"Couldn't be," Harry replied.
"Why not?" Ron asked.
"His goal is immortality, not legacy. Besides, if he did have a heir, it would be Malfoy, not little Malfoy," Harry reasoned.
"What makes you think that?" Ron questioned.
"Malfoy is the oldest. Why would he pick Keiran?" Harry replied.
"PUTRID PUSTULE!"
"Good point," Ron relented.
"What else did she say?" Harry asked.
"She mentioned Lucius putting Cruciatus on Draco," Hermione whispered.
"What?" Ron asked. Harry visibly shuddered. Hermione reached over and placed a hand reassuringly on his arm.
"That's not legal!" Ron exclaimed.
"Muggles like to call it child abuse," Hermione said.
"But they're not muggle," Ron said, shaking his head in amazement. Harry remained silent.
"You're right," Hermione replied.
"BANDERSNATCH!"
"You've read "Jabberwocky"?" Hermione asked the jarvey.
"They wrote something about that bastard?" the jarvey asked. Hermione laughed and turned back to the boys.
"So Draco's been subjected to that curse," Harry said finally.
"Yes," Hermione replied, "multiple times from what I understand."
"Anything else?" Ron asked.
"Not really. The reign thing is what distressed me the most," Hermione confided.
"It is rather interesting," Harry agreed. He scratched his chin and looked thoughtfully over at the Forbidden Forest.
"Time's up class! Head up to Herbology!" Hagrid shouted from his position right at his cabin.
"Thanks," Harry told the jarvey.
"FOUR EYED SCAR FACED COWARD!" the jarvey screeched.
"Not a problem. Get me the gnomes," it said at a normal volume level.
"Will do," Ron said. The three friends started towards the castle.
"How do you plan on getting garden gnomes?" Hermione asked.
"I'll ask Dobby," Harry laughed. Ron and Hermione both laughed with Harry and all three tried to push Hermione's revelation about Astrid's brothers to the farthest recesses of their minds.