"Well uh Xena..." Gabrielle started then looked at Ares again and smiled.
"Ares and I were just about to go collect some firewood. For breakfast and
all." She said with a bright grin hoping Xena would believe her.
Xena looked at Gabrielle knowing more then one thing wasn't quite right. For one thing Gabrielle & Ares hated each other now they were getting on like they were best friends. For another, "Ares collecting firewood?" she asked doubtfully looking at Ares who shrugged then nodded. "If you say so." She found it best not to argue with Gabrielle, it took too long and there wasn't usually a clear winner anyway, it was just pointless. Better to just like Gabrielle do whatever she had to do with Ares and then yell at her about it later, it would work out that way anyway. "I'll just start preparing the fish." Xena said walking over to her bag and pulling out the knife. She walked past Ares holding up the knife in front of her and paused in front of him, "See you later Ares." She smirked as he noticeably gulped. She continued on to the fish and started gutting them.
Ares stares at Xena making Gabrielle roll her eyes and pull on his wrist, "Come on!" she snapped. Gabrielle turned around and walked deeper in the forest not bothering to wait for Ares.
Ares sighed and walked along behind Gabrielle wondering why she had such an attitude. "Collecting firewood?" Ares asks raising an eyebrow at Gabrielle as soon as he caught up with her.
"I couldn't think of anything better. I didn't notice you coming up with anything." Gabrielle said pointedly as she started picking up pieces of wood from the forest floor.
"We're actually getting firewood? I thought that whole 'collecting firewood' thing was just an excuse." Ares said looking at the wood in Gabrielle's arm distastefully. "I could just zap a tree."
"That's not how you collect firewood! Can't you do anything normal?" Gabrielle asked Ares. He sighed and bent down and picked up a piece of wood and held it up to Gabrielle like he should get a medal. "It's not like I want to be here with you either."
"Then it wasn't a ploy to get me alone." Ares said grinning sardonically. Gabrielle glared and shoved the wood she had collected into his gut; he bent over with a loud 'oof'.
Gabrielle snickered at Ares who in turn gave her a look that if looks could kill... well actually since he was Ares his looks could kill. "We have to finish talking about Xena. We can't exactly do that with her around." Gabrielle sighed and faced Ares, all traces of humor gone from her face. "I want you to save Xena." Gabrielle said softly. The fates didn't get to decide everything, she could decide for once.
"I can do that, and you'll give me what I want?"
"Ares! You can't just expect Xena to run off with you if I say so. She would know something was going on. And I'm not just going to disappear from her life. The two of us belong together, she wouldn't leave me." Gabrielle told Ares, having a bit of a stare off with him.
"She would leave you for a few days. She's done it before. You're the big story teller right? Just make up a little story about you having to leave for a little while and having to stay with me. You can do that can't you?"
"Bard." Gabrielle responded.
"Bird? What? Where?" Ares asked, as he looked around in confusion.
"I'm a b-ard, bard. Not a story teller. There's a difference." She insisted.
"Whatever, I don't really care about your little scrolls. Especially from what I've seen written about me. Are you gonna tell Xena she has to stay with me for a week?"
"Three days." Gabrielle countered.
"Six." Ares said stepping closer and trying to look intimidating again.
"Four." Gabrielle said crossing her arms, not at all intimidated.
"Five." He snarled and handed the armload of firewood back to Gabrielle who snatched it away from him.
"Fine, five days. That's all you want with Xena and you'll be happy?"
"It's all I need to convince her we belong together. Without her little pest of a side kick running around and interfering I should be able to get through to her."
Gabrielle chose to ignore Ares little digs and insults, "We have a deal, you'll save Xena?"
"Consider it done... as soon as you get Xena to agree to spend five days with me." Ares said smiling sinisterly.
"Fine." Gabrielle agreed glaring daggers. "But you do know that after those five days there's no way Xena will be staying with you."
"We'll see about that Gabrielle. Xena and I used to be pretty close; since you've been around haven't had much of a chance at the one on one." Ares grins and snickers a little. "With you out of the picture I'm sure that will change quite a bit. Don't worry; when we get together we'll save a nice little tower in our castle for you to sleep in." Ares grins and grabs another piece of wood. "Now are we done with this wood collecting thing?" he says boredly.
Gabrielle looked at the pile in her arm and the one piece Ares held. "Good enough. Xena will be wondering what kept us so long, let's go." She sighed and turned around heading back to her and Xena's camp. Ares followed behind Gabrielle, picking up pieces of wood as he went along until his armload was almost double Gabrielle's.
Xena looked up as Gabrielle and Ares entered the small clearing that had been hers and Gabrielle's camp for the night. "About time, was about to send out a search party." She said sarcastically.
"Aw Xena, didn't know you cared so much." Ares grinned at her then held out the wood. "Gabrielle was being lazy; she didn't really want to collect wood so I had to do most of the job. Shame on you Gabrielle." Ares said looking over at her and shaking his head disapprovingly.
"Ares!" Gabrielle gasped out, not believing he was saying that SHE was the lazy one. She dropped her wood on the ground and glared.
"Yes Gabrielle?" Ares said innocently, setting his pieces of wood into what he thought would make a good looking fire.
"You know very well that YOU were the one who didn't want to collect the wood!" Gabrielle said bickering.
"Hey hey! Children, play nice or don't get any supper." Xena said icily annoyed at the immaturity of her best friend and a god who was centuries old. "I cleaned the fish, now that means you cook." She said smiling at Gabrielle.
Gabrielle sighed and started trying to get the fire started and wasn't doing a good job of it... Ares sighed impatiently and let loose a blast that set the wood ablaze. Gabrielle jumped back, "You could have got me!" She yelled jumping up.
"Oh well, maybe next time I'll be lucky." Ares grinned and Xena had to cover a little smirk knowing that Ares had excellent aim.
Gabrielle saw Xena's smirk and gave her a dirty look which sent Xena flashing an innocent wide eyed look then pretending her boot was unlaced and went about trying it. Gabrielle sighed grabbing a pan out of a bag and started cooking the fish. Ares stood around bored mainly staring at Xena then he realized that the plan needed to be set in motion. He started staring at Gabrielle trying to hint to her to get going. "What?" Gabrielle asked after she looked up for the 5th time and noticed Ares was still staring at her. He made a head jerk toward Xena. "What are you doing?" Ares sighed and started doing a charades bit hoping Xena wouldn't notice. He pointed at Gabrielle then made a shooing away motion. Then pointed at Xena then himself and held up a finger from each hand and bobbled them in the air like they were walking toward each other then started pressing them against one another like they were making out. Gabrielle sighed in disgust and Ares grinned finished with his little performance.
Xena looked up curiously just in time to see Ares pull his 2 fingers away from one another. "What's going on..?"
"Food's done." Gabrielle smiled innocently and held up a plate of fish.
"Great, I'm starved." Xena said walking over forgetting her suspicion. She grabbed the plate and started digging in. Ares started nodding to Xena again right as Gabrielle was about to start eating. She sighed wanting to eat but not wanting him to do some miming next.
"Uh Xena..?" Gabrielle began tentatively then took a bite of the fish for some courage.
Xena looked up and licked her lips then wiped her mouth with the back of her hand. "Yeah?" she asked. "Good job cooking." She said nodding in appreciation.
"Thanks." Gabrielle beamed. "I tried this new spice it's called pepper...and..." Ares gave Gabrielle a look before she started one of her rambles. "And, that's not the point. The point is, you may be wondering why Ares came to see us and why he's still here." Xena nodded taking another bite of fish. Gabrielle put hers down suddenly not having much of an appetite. "Well the thing is.." she began then glanced at Ares and an evil grin formed on her lips. "The thing is that he's having a bit of a... performance problem." She said whispering the last two words.
Ares eyes nearly bulged out of his head. Xena couldn't hold back a snicker, "Performance problems?" she asked glancing at Ares and looking.... just looking.
"With his powers I mean." Gabrielle continued with a bit of a grin. "That's why I was so worried about him blasting that fire earlier. He's also having problems with his other powers like popping out to places, that's why he hasn't um done that." Gabrielle said making it up as she went along. "And some people found out about it and they're hunting him done. He wants you to give him a little protection. If his powers aren't working so well then maybe the whole immortality thing might not be working either. They want to try and take him out, maybe even take over as God of War." She finished up proud of her tale.
"Aw, is wittle Ares scarwed?" Xena asked, in a baby voice. Ares just glared back in response.
"So you'll help him right?" Gabrielle asked, "Because we both know that he's the best person for the job when all those others competed. And we also know that without a God of War there's just chaos from the last time he was mortal." Gabrielle said guilting Xena into agreeing to the job.
"Yes, yes I remember Gabrielle. Of course I'll help." She said, her voice soft and warm as she smiled at Ares. "We don't want wittle Ares to get hurt." She said in a baby voice again then set herself into a fit of giggles.
"Wish I could come along sure sounds fun." Gabrielle says in a mock wistful voice.
Xena looked up from her fish again confused, "What? Why aren't you coming with us?"
"It's my niece's birthday." Gabrielle told Xena like she should have known. "Remember? I told you about this a week ago!" She said sounding annoyed.
"Oh yeah, I remember." Xena nodded like she had some idea what Gabrielle was talking about. "Why can't Ares tag along to the celebration?"
"That's just what my niece wants the God of War crashing her party along with a dozen men trying to kill him. That's a great way to celebrate the day of your birth." Gabrielle said sarcastically. Ares had to hid a smile, as much as he hated her Gabrielle was good with these stories... except when she wrote that he was a big wuss. "So I should just get going. Let's say we meet up outside of Potedia in... five days? That should give you plenty of time to figure out what's wrong with Ares and give me time to spend with my family." Gabrielle started cleaning things up from the campsite.
Xena looked over at Ares as she grabbed another fish, "I don't think I'll ever be able to figure out what's wrong with Ares."
"Funny... very funny." Ares said sarcastically but couldn't help smiling knowing that for the next five days Xena was all his.
Xena looked at Gabrielle knowing more then one thing wasn't quite right. For one thing Gabrielle & Ares hated each other now they were getting on like they were best friends. For another, "Ares collecting firewood?" she asked doubtfully looking at Ares who shrugged then nodded. "If you say so." She found it best not to argue with Gabrielle, it took too long and there wasn't usually a clear winner anyway, it was just pointless. Better to just like Gabrielle do whatever she had to do with Ares and then yell at her about it later, it would work out that way anyway. "I'll just start preparing the fish." Xena said walking over to her bag and pulling out the knife. She walked past Ares holding up the knife in front of her and paused in front of him, "See you later Ares." She smirked as he noticeably gulped. She continued on to the fish and started gutting them.
Ares stares at Xena making Gabrielle roll her eyes and pull on his wrist, "Come on!" she snapped. Gabrielle turned around and walked deeper in the forest not bothering to wait for Ares.
Ares sighed and walked along behind Gabrielle wondering why she had such an attitude. "Collecting firewood?" Ares asks raising an eyebrow at Gabrielle as soon as he caught up with her.
"I couldn't think of anything better. I didn't notice you coming up with anything." Gabrielle said pointedly as she started picking up pieces of wood from the forest floor.
"We're actually getting firewood? I thought that whole 'collecting firewood' thing was just an excuse." Ares said looking at the wood in Gabrielle's arm distastefully. "I could just zap a tree."
"That's not how you collect firewood! Can't you do anything normal?" Gabrielle asked Ares. He sighed and bent down and picked up a piece of wood and held it up to Gabrielle like he should get a medal. "It's not like I want to be here with you either."
"Then it wasn't a ploy to get me alone." Ares said grinning sardonically. Gabrielle glared and shoved the wood she had collected into his gut; he bent over with a loud 'oof'.
Gabrielle snickered at Ares who in turn gave her a look that if looks could kill... well actually since he was Ares his looks could kill. "We have to finish talking about Xena. We can't exactly do that with her around." Gabrielle sighed and faced Ares, all traces of humor gone from her face. "I want you to save Xena." Gabrielle said softly. The fates didn't get to decide everything, she could decide for once.
"I can do that, and you'll give me what I want?"
"Ares! You can't just expect Xena to run off with you if I say so. She would know something was going on. And I'm not just going to disappear from her life. The two of us belong together, she wouldn't leave me." Gabrielle told Ares, having a bit of a stare off with him.
"She would leave you for a few days. She's done it before. You're the big story teller right? Just make up a little story about you having to leave for a little while and having to stay with me. You can do that can't you?"
"Bard." Gabrielle responded.
"Bird? What? Where?" Ares asked, as he looked around in confusion.
"I'm a b-ard, bard. Not a story teller. There's a difference." She insisted.
"Whatever, I don't really care about your little scrolls. Especially from what I've seen written about me. Are you gonna tell Xena she has to stay with me for a week?"
"Three days." Gabrielle countered.
"Six." Ares said stepping closer and trying to look intimidating again.
"Four." Gabrielle said crossing her arms, not at all intimidated.
"Five." He snarled and handed the armload of firewood back to Gabrielle who snatched it away from him.
"Fine, five days. That's all you want with Xena and you'll be happy?"
"It's all I need to convince her we belong together. Without her little pest of a side kick running around and interfering I should be able to get through to her."
Gabrielle chose to ignore Ares little digs and insults, "We have a deal, you'll save Xena?"
"Consider it done... as soon as you get Xena to agree to spend five days with me." Ares said smiling sinisterly.
"Fine." Gabrielle agreed glaring daggers. "But you do know that after those five days there's no way Xena will be staying with you."
"We'll see about that Gabrielle. Xena and I used to be pretty close; since you've been around haven't had much of a chance at the one on one." Ares grins and snickers a little. "With you out of the picture I'm sure that will change quite a bit. Don't worry; when we get together we'll save a nice little tower in our castle for you to sleep in." Ares grins and grabs another piece of wood. "Now are we done with this wood collecting thing?" he says boredly.
Gabrielle looked at the pile in her arm and the one piece Ares held. "Good enough. Xena will be wondering what kept us so long, let's go." She sighed and turned around heading back to her and Xena's camp. Ares followed behind Gabrielle, picking up pieces of wood as he went along until his armload was almost double Gabrielle's.
Xena looked up as Gabrielle and Ares entered the small clearing that had been hers and Gabrielle's camp for the night. "About time, was about to send out a search party." She said sarcastically.
"Aw Xena, didn't know you cared so much." Ares grinned at her then held out the wood. "Gabrielle was being lazy; she didn't really want to collect wood so I had to do most of the job. Shame on you Gabrielle." Ares said looking over at her and shaking his head disapprovingly.
"Ares!" Gabrielle gasped out, not believing he was saying that SHE was the lazy one. She dropped her wood on the ground and glared.
"Yes Gabrielle?" Ares said innocently, setting his pieces of wood into what he thought would make a good looking fire.
"You know very well that YOU were the one who didn't want to collect the wood!" Gabrielle said bickering.
"Hey hey! Children, play nice or don't get any supper." Xena said icily annoyed at the immaturity of her best friend and a god who was centuries old. "I cleaned the fish, now that means you cook." She said smiling at Gabrielle.
Gabrielle sighed and started trying to get the fire started and wasn't doing a good job of it... Ares sighed impatiently and let loose a blast that set the wood ablaze. Gabrielle jumped back, "You could have got me!" She yelled jumping up.
"Oh well, maybe next time I'll be lucky." Ares grinned and Xena had to cover a little smirk knowing that Ares had excellent aim.
Gabrielle saw Xena's smirk and gave her a dirty look which sent Xena flashing an innocent wide eyed look then pretending her boot was unlaced and went about trying it. Gabrielle sighed grabbing a pan out of a bag and started cooking the fish. Ares stood around bored mainly staring at Xena then he realized that the plan needed to be set in motion. He started staring at Gabrielle trying to hint to her to get going. "What?" Gabrielle asked after she looked up for the 5th time and noticed Ares was still staring at her. He made a head jerk toward Xena. "What are you doing?" Ares sighed and started doing a charades bit hoping Xena wouldn't notice. He pointed at Gabrielle then made a shooing away motion. Then pointed at Xena then himself and held up a finger from each hand and bobbled them in the air like they were walking toward each other then started pressing them against one another like they were making out. Gabrielle sighed in disgust and Ares grinned finished with his little performance.
Xena looked up curiously just in time to see Ares pull his 2 fingers away from one another. "What's going on..?"
"Food's done." Gabrielle smiled innocently and held up a plate of fish.
"Great, I'm starved." Xena said walking over forgetting her suspicion. She grabbed the plate and started digging in. Ares started nodding to Xena again right as Gabrielle was about to start eating. She sighed wanting to eat but not wanting him to do some miming next.
"Uh Xena..?" Gabrielle began tentatively then took a bite of the fish for some courage.
Xena looked up and licked her lips then wiped her mouth with the back of her hand. "Yeah?" she asked. "Good job cooking." She said nodding in appreciation.
"Thanks." Gabrielle beamed. "I tried this new spice it's called pepper...and..." Ares gave Gabrielle a look before she started one of her rambles. "And, that's not the point. The point is, you may be wondering why Ares came to see us and why he's still here." Xena nodded taking another bite of fish. Gabrielle put hers down suddenly not having much of an appetite. "Well the thing is.." she began then glanced at Ares and an evil grin formed on her lips. "The thing is that he's having a bit of a... performance problem." She said whispering the last two words.
Ares eyes nearly bulged out of his head. Xena couldn't hold back a snicker, "Performance problems?" she asked glancing at Ares and looking.... just looking.
"With his powers I mean." Gabrielle continued with a bit of a grin. "That's why I was so worried about him blasting that fire earlier. He's also having problems with his other powers like popping out to places, that's why he hasn't um done that." Gabrielle said making it up as she went along. "And some people found out about it and they're hunting him done. He wants you to give him a little protection. If his powers aren't working so well then maybe the whole immortality thing might not be working either. They want to try and take him out, maybe even take over as God of War." She finished up proud of her tale.
"Aw, is wittle Ares scarwed?" Xena asked, in a baby voice. Ares just glared back in response.
"So you'll help him right?" Gabrielle asked, "Because we both know that he's the best person for the job when all those others competed. And we also know that without a God of War there's just chaos from the last time he was mortal." Gabrielle said guilting Xena into agreeing to the job.
"Yes, yes I remember Gabrielle. Of course I'll help." She said, her voice soft and warm as she smiled at Ares. "We don't want wittle Ares to get hurt." She said in a baby voice again then set herself into a fit of giggles.
"Wish I could come along sure sounds fun." Gabrielle says in a mock wistful voice.
Xena looked up from her fish again confused, "What? Why aren't you coming with us?"
"It's my niece's birthday." Gabrielle told Xena like she should have known. "Remember? I told you about this a week ago!" She said sounding annoyed.
"Oh yeah, I remember." Xena nodded like she had some idea what Gabrielle was talking about. "Why can't Ares tag along to the celebration?"
"That's just what my niece wants the God of War crashing her party along with a dozen men trying to kill him. That's a great way to celebrate the day of your birth." Gabrielle said sarcastically. Ares had to hid a smile, as much as he hated her Gabrielle was good with these stories... except when she wrote that he was a big wuss. "So I should just get going. Let's say we meet up outside of Potedia in... five days? That should give you plenty of time to figure out what's wrong with Ares and give me time to spend with my family." Gabrielle started cleaning things up from the campsite.
Xena looked over at Ares as she grabbed another fish, "I don't think I'll ever be able to figure out what's wrong with Ares."
"Funny... very funny." Ares said sarcastically but couldn't help smiling knowing that for the next five days Xena was all his.