GI Joe: The Movie, Evo-tized!
To Red Witch: So that's where you got Dragonfly from. Huh. BTW, when I introduce my Rawhides, you may recognize a couple of them.
To Metal Dragon1: Yeah, the third Serpentor is born! What would happen if he met the less stable Joes? Who knows, man. Who knows. And what do you have planeed for the next chapter of "Take the Long Way Home"? Read the new chapter and loved it!
To Wizard1: When is Chapter Four of "Kareoke Dance Party" coming up? I WANNA READ IT!!!!
To Aaron: I doubt Nemesis Enforcer can hold out long against Jake. In his Dragon Mode, Jake gets stronger the more he fights. Nemesis will last a while, but Jake will in the end get enough strength to beat him down. I do plan to stay true to the movie. I've only seen it once or twice myself.
To Sparky Genocide: I think that's funny about Serpentor III being made from various teen celebs. As for your Firester/Pyro/Sunfire thing, I don't know. I'll see. As for the new recruits, you'll find out when you meet my Rawhides! They're a mix of "new" Joes, and mutants!
It's Profile Time Again! *Crowd cheers* This time, we look at a Joe with more hobbies than a collector's store! Ladies and gents, meet Red Dragon's handler: Airtight!
Airtight
Real Name: Kurt Schnurr
Affiliation: Army
Rank: E-4
Primary Military Specialty: CBR (Chemical, Biological, and Radiological) Warfare.
Secondary Military Specialty: Ordinance, Misfit Handler (Red Dragon)
Birthplace: New Haven, Conneticut
Bio: As a kid, Airtight was considered weird. And who could blame him: He raises scorpions, collected plastic dinosaurs, played odd jokes, and even managed to get a tiger shark!
As intelligent as he is weird, Airtight grew fascinated with CBR weapons, and studied them in the Army. In GI Joe, he managed to collect quite an impressive batch of samples of various CBR weapons. He also grew to love wrestling, and he manages to start various collections, from normal ones like baseball cards, to weird ones like fungus.
In possession of his own lab, Airtight was made the handler of the Misfit Jake Wildfire, codename Red Dragon. A wrestling fan, Airtight was thrilled. Under Airtight, Jake's main duty is to help Airtight around the lab, and to help care for Toothy, a velociraptor-like creature. Toothy was born when Craig Starr, the Misfit codenamed Darkstar, blasted a muffin made by X-Man Kitty Pryde, codename Shadowcat, with his eye laser. The molecules of the badly-made muffin and the laser formed DNA and Toothy was born.
Airtight is also a very big practical joker.
Chapter 4: Capture of Serpentor!
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(Cobra Base)
"What do you want?" Serpentor III asked Pythona. The snake-like sorceress smirked.
"I come from Cobra-La." Pythona smirked.
"Cobra-La?" Leathersuit asked. "Sounds like some planet from a cheesy sci-fi B-movie." Pythona raised an eyebrow at the alligator-like teenage Dreadnok.
"Cobra-La is an ancient civilization driven underground by man. We require a device."
"What are you taking about?" Zartan wondered.
"The Broadcast Energy Transmitter. The humans known as GI Joe have one."
"Virus could build a Broadcast Energy Transmitter for you." Zartan grumbled. "So why should we steal it from GI Joe?"
"I do not trust the inventor." Pythona said. "I sense his mind. It's chaotic. Too dysfunctional. Typical of the state of the severely mentally ill."
"We know Virus is sick in the head. You don't need to remind us." Serpentor III grumbled.
"Besides, you wish to see GI Joe destroyed as much as we do." Pythona added.
"You do have a point." Serpentor nodded.
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(GI Joe Base, the Alps)
"Well, is the BET hooked up?" Duke asked a Malibu Joe with short black hair and clad in a blue uniform with brown boots and backwards blue cap. He had appeared to be in his late thirties. He was born Eddie Polanski, a Marine from Seattle, Washington. His codename was Fusebox, the Joe electrician. He could fix anything that needed an electrical current.
"Got it boss." Fusebox shut the panel. "All our weapons are connected to this thing. Man, I tell you, this B.E.T. thing could power all of Malibu for a year! I'm surprised that Cobra's not going to come after this thing."
"I wouldn't count them out for long." Duke sighed. "Heaven knows they'll be here soon to try and get their claws on this thing."
"I'd like to see them try. We got almost 30 hyperactive mutant kids just waiting to do something with their time." Fusebox chuckled.
"CHILLJAW!!! GET OUT OF THE POOL!!! AND STOP EATING THE LIFE PRESERVERS!!!!!" The voice of Beach-Head yelled.
"ACE, STOP SHOWING OFF THOSE LETTERS!!!! YOU NEARLY GAVE TWELVE JOES HEART ATTACKS WITH THOSE!!!!!!!" Lady Jaye screamed.
"WHO GAVE THE WEST COAST KIDS COFFEE?!" Hardcase roared. "VELOCITY'S RUNNING AROUND, STARTING TORNADOS OVER HERE!!!" Suddenly, the "tranquility" was interrupted.
"COOOOOOOOBRAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!" Serpentor cried as he rode to the base on a HISS Tank. There were also numerous other tanks and planes all ready to attack.
"It's Cobra! They're after the BET!!!" Duke yelled. A blast knocked Duke and Fusebox away from the BET. The electrician was knocked out, and Duke was on his back. "Ohhhhh…"
"Got him!" Wild Weasel grinned. "Now to get the BET and uh oh." He noticed a certain blond girl clad in a green-and-yellow costume fly to him.
"WAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Siryn wailed, her sonic beam shattering the Rattler.
"AAAGH!!!! MY BUTT!!!!!" Wild Weasel screamed. Turns out ol' Serpentor underestimated the might of the Joes and two teams of Misfits. The planes ended being assaulted by Red Dragon, Sunfire, Thunderbolt, and Siryn. The other Misfits helped deal with the ground troops.
"Hey jabroni!" Kyle called at Serpentor III. "What is your name?"
"I am…"
"IT DOESN'T MATTER WHAT YOUR NAME IS!!!! KNOW YOUR ROLE AND SHUT YOUR MOUTH!!!!" Kyle nailed Serpentor with a thunder-charged slap. Serpentor staggered a bit, and smirked.
"I am quite stronger than the other two." He chuckled. Kyle grimaced. He slapped Serpentor again.
"You're still just a stupid jabroni!" Kyle sneered. He slapped Serpentor one more time. "How ya like that Jabroni? Yeah, I'm Rick James, %$#&@!!!!"
"HA!!" Thunderbird leapt up and slammed Serpentor III hard with a shoulder tackle, knocking him to a cage of flames created by Pyro.
"WHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!" Pyro cackled triumphantly. "Got you!" Serpentor snarled at the Australian.
"As soon as I am free, you will be first to die." Serpentor said. Pyro giggled madly.
"I got you now, King of the Dryer Fairies!" John grinned maliciously. "I'm gonna make you pay for stealing all my socks for your world-conquering machine!" Serpentor blinked.
"You're as insane as that idiot Virus."
"COBRA!!!!! RETREAT!!!!!!" Cobra Commander screamed. He knew that the Joes, with all the Misfits, were unstoppable at this point. Duke looked at Serpentor.
"Good job, Pyro." He complimented.
"Can I burn him?" John asked with a grin.
"Maybe later." Duke shrugged. "Roadblock! Send a unit out there and find out where the heck they're going!"
"You'll never defeat Cobra-La." Serpentor smirked.
"Cobra-La?" Duke asked.
"Sounds like one of Pyro's insane sleep-ramblings." Kyle sighed. "Anyway, where's that jabroni Dragonfly?"
"Tending to the wounded." Thunderbird replied, pointing to Lina helping out Barbecue. Kyle walked to her.
"What were you doing?! The Thunderbolt busts his butt, and you were just standing there doing nothing!" Kyle snapped. "You chicken!"
"Lay off, Kyle." Barbecue said. "Thank you, Lina."
"My pleasure." Lina smiled. "Hope you feel better."
"Listen you little bug." Kyle snarled. "I do not take too kindly to cowardice. You ever pull that stunt again, and you'll get a million volts through you!" Kyle stomped away, leaving a confused Lina.
"What'd I do?" Lina asked Barbecue. The fireman shrugged. Pyro gleefully ran up to him.
"Guess what, Barbecue? I caught Serpentor and Duke said I can set him on fire later!" he giggled madly.
Hoo boy. Things are going up now? What'll the Joes do with Serpentor? How will the bad guys react? Will Kyle ever accept Lina? What'll the Joes do? Can they protect the BET? What'll happen next? Find out in the next chapter! Suggestions needed badly!