Disclaimer: All facts and characters related to Tolkien's works are his.

These Burdens we Carry

Chapter IV Alone

"Where have you been?"

Aragorn's tone was laced with accusation. He knew Legolas had been in those woods and his friend's refusal to acknowledge his presence stung.

Legolas chin tilted stubbornly upwards and his gaze hardened.

"I needed some time alone." He gritted out, not meeting the ranger's eyes. An awkward silence fell over the room for a few moments, finally being broken by a soft sigh from the elf. The cold look in his eyes had been replaced by regret.

"I  am sorry… I just…"

Legolas' voice trailed off, his fingers fiddling nervously with the edges of his tunic.

"It's alright. I understand" Aragorn interrupted woodenly. Legolas winced at his tone. He had not meant to push his friend away like that. It was just so difficult to behave normally around those he knew nowadays…

So lost in thoughts was he that he hardly noticed that Aragorn had once again left him to his own devices. He was secretly glad to be alone once more. He had not known how long he could push away the visions of the ranger being twisted by his own mind. He gazed sadly up at the stars. They offered no solace. He wondered if his companions had been able to seek comfort from the stars in the clutches of the orcs… he doubted it.

Somehow, it felt wrong that he was able to look upon the stars that they never would see again. Remorsefully, he turned away from the night sky. The gentle breeze caressed his face and playfully teased a few errant strands of hair while he stood there in the balcony as still as a stature.

~*~

His bed lay in a crumpled mess, the sheets tangled and the pillows thrown onto the floor. Legolas sat huddled in a corner staring blankly into the empty fire place, his knees hugged tightly to his body. His shoulders trembled faintly with silent sobs and his face was twisted with the agony of suppressed hurt.

He could feel his grief welling up inside his chest and the tears brimming. Not again… not again… he thought desperately. These spasms of grief left him helpless and weak not to mention vulnerable. His heart always felt so raw from the feelings of guilt and sorrow that tore through him that he was wary of exposing it again.

He felt so tired, all he wanted was to sleep un- plagued by dreams once again.

~*~

Aragorn lay awake in bed. His hands were propped up behind his head in place of a pillow and his eyes stared thoughtfully at the ceiling. Something didn't feel quite right about the whole situation with Legolas.

Soft sounds of distress drifted through the window and Aragorn started. They sounded vaguely familiar, as though they were being made by someone whose voice he knew so well.

Hurriedly, he sat up and not even bothering to pull on his boots, started out for Legolas' room.

He hesitated outside the door. I needed some time alone… the words rang in his head. Another muffled sob chased away all doubts that Aragorn had and he pushed the door open carefully.

"Legolas…?"

His whisper faded to nothing in the silent room. Aragorn's eyes lighted on the bed and he paused. The elf was no where in sight. He tried to pierce the darkness of the room but sensed no presence of another. The sounds he had heard were gone. Legolas had seemingly vanished. He noted that the thin branches of a tree just below the balcony were swaying vigorously from side to side. Strange. There was no breeze. Puzzled, the ranger closed the door behind him.

Legolas panted heavily. He had escaped a confrontation with the ranger just in time. The branches of the small tree still swayed slightly from the slight disturbance he had caused when he had leapt off the balcony. His room was not high off the ground.

~*~

He was not so lucky the next morning. He was all set for another day of avoiding all those who knew him well when Aragorn had walked in cheerily and dragged him off to have the morning meal.

An uncommon feeling of irritation was beginning to creep over him. He watched with an annoyed expression on his face as the ranger piled food onto his plate. The sight of so much food made his stomach churn.

He swallowed nervously and ignored the forced cheeriness of Aragorn as he focused on calming his nausea. He searched frantically for an opportunity to get away… some excuse. Anything.

"You don't look quite well, Legolas…" Aragorn caught the panicked look on the elf's face and voiced his concern.

"Err… it's nothing. I feel fine." 

Yes… and you look it too. Aragorn thought sarcastically to himself. Shadows lined the eyes of his friend. It was painfully obvious that the elf had not been getting much sleep.

Aragorn wished for the thousandth time that the elf would tell him what the matter was. He knew that Legolas' patrol had been massacred, that he was the only survivor. Word had been sent to Mirkwood of the prince's arrival in Rivendell. Legolas had been rather vague about details regarding the death of his companions.

Living around elves Aragorn knew how emotional hurts could affect them. Legolas displayed all signs of being scarred terribly by the events that had led up to Aragorn's finding of him… but the ranger knew it would not be wise to push his friend to recount all that had happened. He just hoped Legolas would open up soon.

~*

Legolas could feel the unsettled contents of his stomach churning. He gulped and glanced sideways at Aragorn. If only the pesky ranger would leave him alone.

"I-I think i'll go for a walk." He stumbled over the words in his haste to get away. Moving abruptly away from the man, he strode off as quickly as was able for the outdoors.

"Let me come with … " Aragorn stopped mid sentence, the elf had already disappeared.

Legolas retched violently and felt his breakfast coming back up. He ducked his head and vomited painfully onto the ground.

Shudders ran through his body as he shakily wiped his mouth on his sleeve. He felt horrible. Through his blurry vision, he could just make out the green and brown shapes which towered above him. He staggered for the trees, the sun catching his blonde hair before he was swallowed whole by the forest.

TBC…

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Response to reviews:

Amy: Thanx for pointing out my spelling mistakes! I didn't notice, and the spell check didn't reveal it… strangely. In reply to your review from a Twist of Fate, there will be a sequel in which all unfinished business in that fic will be concluded.

Many thanks to

Anastasia who,

Gwyn, Star-stallion,

Captain of the Fluffies,

Gozilla,

Elven kitten,

random idiocity,

linZe,

Amy,

Boromir

and Gilaladh

for the encouraging reviews!!! :o)