As was customary for her to do, Emily Chandler put a call through to the country club where she'd maintained a membership to determine if her ex-husband's current wife was to be in attendance. It was a practice she had taken up as a means of avoiding Binky at all costs. If Binky was not expected to be there, Emily planned to book a lunch reservation for herself and Elizabeth Richards, with whom she'd become very friendly after the marriage of Don and Susan. Being informed that she need not worry about the current 'Mrs. Chandler', Emily proceeded with her plans.
After seven years, Emily still felt a pang of sadness every time her thoughts happened to drift to the subject of her less-than-amicable separation and divorce from Charles. Nearly forty years of marriage, and he'd somehow become infatuated with someone new, someone younger – a 'Trophy Wife'. The almost debilitating state of depression she'd sunk into as a result had since passed, and Emily had in a sense, moved on with her life. Still, she felt incomplete. Seven years of being apart, and she had to privately admit she still loved Charles, even though he had hurt her so deeply.
Once, a few years ago in a less infuriated mood, she had been speaking to Susan, who had been very supportive and a real lifeline in Emily's darkest moments. Susan had tried to get her mother to articulate her feelings towards Charles in a more positive way, to try to remove the negativity she felt.
"If you had asked me to do this even a year ago, Susan, my response would have been different," Emily had said. "But if I were to express my feelings now…do you remember that album you used to always play years ago when you were still living at home and in law school? I think it was Sadé. There was one song, and the words went something like: 'I won't pretend that I intend to stop living/I won't pretend I'm good at forgiving/But I can't hate you, although I have tried/I still really, really love you/Love is stronger than pride.' "
"I remember," Susan had said. "Is that the way you truly feel about Dad now?"
"Honestly, Susan, it's nearly impossible for me to forgive him for what he did to me – what he did to the family…I hate what he did, but I can't hate him."
