Disclaimer: Um…No?
A/N: I finally got my website up!
View my profile page for the address. I can't post it on the story because FF.Net will give me a hard time. ^^'
Be sure to check it out if you can! ^_^
Hunting For The Elusive Mayfly Known As Love…Not
Chapter Eleven
Vacation
"He's not your man either," Vash said as he sided himself next to Demonte. "And I won't let you take either of them." He grinned as he looked at Demonte. "I'll join forces with you…just this once, Demonte."
Demonte mirrored the smiled as he turned to face front.
"Good," He laughed. "En Garde`."
"You're serious?" Spike asked skeptically as he crossed his arms over his chest. "You want to challenge us?"
"That's right," Vash said as he proceeded to get into his fighting stance. "Why? Don't believe us?"
"…Okay," Spike said reluctantly as he released Nick and motioned Jet to do the same. "You're on."
"All right…" Vash said. He paused and then…
"RUN!" Demonte shouted as he, Nick, Meryl, and Milly sprinted towards the exit.
"HEY!" Spike shouted.
"Aw, come on now," Vash laughed. "Let's just call it quits already. After all..." Vash reached deep into his pocket. "…the world IS made of LOVE AND PEACE!" Vash withdrew a piece of paper and flung it in Spike's face. "See ya!" And with that he made way for the door.
"What the…!?" Spike clutched the paper and Jet stood over his shoulder.
"What's it say?" Jet asked.
Spike paused. "It says…'You've just been hit by a'…wait, I can't read that…"
"I do believe it says 'smooth', Spike."
"Oh, thank you Jet. It says, 'You've just been hit by a smooth criminal'…" Spike paused again as he squinted at the picture in the middle of the paper. "You know that this picture looks an awful look like that blonde spiky kid…"
"It's a caricature, Spike."
"Right…wait…" Spike growled. "BLAST THOSE LITTLE BRATS!" He crumpled the paper and clenched his teeth. "THEY'VE OUTSMARTED US!"
Down the road…
"HA! Didn't even see that coming!" Demonte laughed as he continued to jog down the street. "Hey, they plowed the streets."
"Yeah, the snow has finally disappeared from the roads." Nick grinned. "Thanks for the help back there."
"Hey wait for me!" The four turned back to Vash, who was quickly catching up to them. "We'd better get to my house. Those guys will be after us any time now." He glanced at Demonte. "All right, Kalabis, even YOU can come too."
"I'm glad to see that you're back to your same old disgusted self, Vash." Demonte grinned innocently.
"Yeah, well, let's just go before I change my mind." Vash rolled his eyes.
Meanwhile…
"So…on the first evening of pebble…" Rem sang softly as she finished the dirty laundry. "…from somewhere out of nowhere drops upon the dreaming world…" She dropped the clothes into the washer and set it on medium. "So…"
RUSTLE
RUSTLE
Rem halted and turned in the direction of the furnace nearby.
"Yeah…that feels good…" Came a soft moan from a female.
Curious as to see what it was, Rem quietly crept to the furnace, the strange noises getting louder.
"You know that you're my woman, Claire…" A male voice this time.
Feeling more confident, Rem picked up her pace and walked around the side of the furnace. When she realized what she had walked in on, she nearly fainted.
"ALEX!" Rem screamed as she looked at the fully clothed (A/N: Sorry to all the perverts out there…) woman in Alex's arms. "What is the meaning of this!?"
Alex, looking VERY bewildered, shook the woman from his arms and pointed an accusing finger at her. "REM! Thank the melons that you're here! She MADE me do it!"
"WHAT!?" Claire and Rem shouted in unison.
"You jerk! You said that you were single!" Claire whapped him across the arm before storming up the stairs.
Anger clouded Rem's face and she crossed her arms over her chest. Alex laughed nervously and hastily continued to speak. "Now Rem, it's NOT what you think."
"Oh REALLY!?" Rem flared. "It's NOT is it?"
"…No." Alex replied meekly.
"I REALLY thought that you had changed, Alex. This isn't the FIRST, nor the second, or even the THIRD time I've caught you doing this! I kicked you out before, and by God I'll do it again!" Rem turned on her heel and vanished up the stairs.
"Huh!? Now wait a minute Rem! You can't do that to me! I'm ALEX! You know, SEXY ALEX!"
He followed her to her bedroom where she began to pack.
"Wait, I thought that I was leaving." Alex began.
"YOU ARE!" Rem roared. "I'M going on a WELL DESERVED vacation!"
"Where!?" Alex huffed.
Rem looked up and pointed a dictating finger at him. "YOU don't need to know that. It IS Christmas Vacation after all. I can go WHERE EVER I please."
Rem grabbed her suitcases and descended the stairs. She looked outside and growled. "Great. NO CARS."
"I see…" Alex said with a big grin. "Guess that that means you'll have to stay here…"
"NOT A CHANCE!" Rem spat back. "I'll use PLAN B!"
Meanwhile, some ways away from the house…
"Boy it sure is cold outside…" Milly commented as she rubbed her hands together.
"Here Milly," Nick said as he draped an arm over her. "How's that?"
"Oh…" Milly blushed. "T-Thank you, Nick…"
"Hey…isn't that Rem coming down the road?" Meryl asked as she scouted ahead.
"…You're right," Vash said. "Hey…where did she get the truck?"
Rem pulled up beside the kids and rolled down the window. "Get in." She commanded.
"Um…why?" Vash asked.
"Because, MORON," All eyes were peeled on the back window as Knives and Legato came into view. "Rem is going on vacation." Knives replied.
"Knives?" Vash asked.
"Legato?" Demonte's brows knitted together. "What are you doing here? I thought that I saw you at the Sil––"
"Don't keep talking, Kalabis, you're hogging vacation time!" Knives slapped the side of the car with his hand.
"But my family is in jail…" Meryl protested.
"Ditto," Demonte added.
"Who cares!?" Rem growled. "They'll be here when you get back."
"Well my parents don't know WHERE I'm at, currently, so, COUNT ME IN!" Nick cheered.
"But…My parents…" Milly started.
"We'll call them on the road," Rem told her. "Now are you guys going or not?"
"Rem, just a slight problem…" Vash pointed out.
"What?" Rem asked, starting to get irritated.
"Well, there's eight of us here but the truck (which I have absolutely NO idea where you got that cause I crashed the other truck at Porkchop's Supermarket) only seats five people and, in case you haven't noticed, there's eight of us here, including you…"
"So? Three will have to sit in the back of the truck!"
"But…isn't that illegal?" Vash whimpered.
Rem growled angrily and Vash nodded.
"Of course it's not. What was I thinking?"
"I get front seat!" Nick shouted as he raced around the other side of the truck.
"Oooh! I want back!" Milly chirped and followed after Nick.
"Well…" Demonte started, gesturing to himself, Meryl, and Vash. "Guess we get the tailgate."
Meryl climbed into the back and Vash glared at Demonte.
"I'm sitting next to Meryl," Vash told him.
"Sure." Demonte shrugged.
"…Really?" Vash asked, surprised.
"Why should I care?"
"Um…" Vash turned his head. "No reason."
"GET IN ALREADY!" Knives yelled from the front.
Stunned by Demonte's response, Vash slowly climbed into the back of the truck and plopped down beside Meryl as Demonte sat on the far backside.
"Are we IN now!?" Rem sighed. "GOOD. LET'S go!"
"Um, Rem?" Vash called up front. "WHERE exactly are we going?"
"Down south. Where there's no snow." Rem muttered and sped off down the road.
Meanwhile…
"Great…NOW we're in for it…" Spike sighed as he sat back in his chair, as Jet shoved his face into a bowl full of noodles and rice.
"Hey, look on the bright side," Jet said with a mouth full of food. "At least we aren't going down without food."
"What's THAT have to do with anything!?" Spike rolled his eyes. "The Boss is going to kill US! We lost the Preacher Kid AGAIN! Who KNOWS where he is now."
As if on cue, the door swung open and a dark figure stood there, haunting the doorway.
"B-Boss!" Jet and Spike straightened. "Y-You're back!"
The Boss stormed past Spike and yanked the rice bowl out of Jet's hand.
"I leave and come back to find you with THIS!?" The Boss snapped at Jet. "You two good-for-nothing morons lost the kid!"
"Um," Jet spoke up. "Technically we aren't entirely SURE that that is our kid, Boss."
SNAP!
The Boss jerked his body down towards Jet, grabbing his coat.
"Are YOU talking BACK to me?"
"Geez Boss, you're in a great mood today." Spike changed the subject. "What seems to be the problem?"
"Nothing of importance," The Boss released Jet's coat. "I'll let your miserable failure slide just this once. But after this…No more Mister Nice Boss…"
Several hours later…
"Ah, the warm beaches of the Pacific!" Knives marveled. "And no snow!"
"Hey, just out of curiosity, since we didn't pack anything," Nick started. "Where are we going to get the extra change of clothes, Rem?"
Rem remained silent.
"Well…I mean, since I'm still wearing PINK and all…" Nick trailed off.
"I'm going to find a hotel room first." Rem finally said. "Tomorrow, you all are going camping."
"We are?" Knives asked.
"RIGHT now, you all are going to play miniature golf."
"Awwww, but REM!" Knives folded his arms over his chest. "I hate miniature golf. Besides, aren't we a little OLD for it?"
"Yay!" Milly clapped her hands together. "I love miniature golf."
"I'll bet you do, Honey," Nick grinned from in the front seat.
In the back of the truck…
"Can you hear what they're talking about?" Demonte asked.
"…No," Vash said, dully.
Several minutes later, the car was parked in front of the miniature golf building and the seven kids got out.
"Here's the money, and I'll be back to pick you up later." Rem told them.
"Aw, Rem! Why are you in such a hurry to get rid of us?" Vash pouted.
"Because I need to find a hotel room and go shopping. LIVE with it." Rem snapped.
She suddenly drove off in the truck and Vash watched as she sped away.
"Aww…" He sighed.
"Wonder what her problem is…" Knives shrugged.
"Oh well, let's just play." Demonte said, jerking a thumb towards the building.
The seven entered, paid for the course, and grabbed their golf balls and clubs.
"All right, I'll be score keeper!" Nick offered.
The first hole was simple. A robotic spider dangled above the hole, swinging back and forth.
"I'll go first," Demonte volunteered.
"WAIT!" Knives screamed. "That CURSED spider! You have to kill the spiders to save the butterflies! DIE!" Knives dash forward, club in hand, and proceed to bash the poor robotic spider, ripping it from the plastic tree it hung from. The wires sizzled and Knives continued to beat the spider with the club. Then he turned and whacked the plastic tree. The tree cracked and toppled over until it smashed a nearby soda stand.
"AHHHHH!!!!" The innocent players and civilians cried as the stand collapsed.
"Kniiiives…" Vash whined. "You ruined their fun!"
"Precisely, dear brother! Clap for me!" Legato was the only one who clapped for Knives.
"Well since hole one is defected, should we skip it?" Meryl asked.
"Nah," Nick waved his hand. "We'll still continue."
Demonte went first, getting a nice par for the first hole. Knives pushed his way to the front, INSISTING that he go second.
"I am VERY GOOD at miniature golf," He bragged. "WATCH the pro IN ACTION!" Knives set his ball down on the green and swung hard. "FORE!" He shouted as the ball went sailing out of the park and landed on the other side of the fence…somewhere.
"So, how did I do?" Knives asked, not taking his eyes off of where the ball had landed.
"Well…You DO get a two stroke penalty for hitting out of bounds…" Nick told him.
"WHAT!?" Knives jerked his head around to see Nick.
"That's something you should be proud of…" Nick grinned. "And it's an additional stroke for every minute the ball remains out of bounds."
"YOU'RE MAKING THAT PART UP, WOLFWOOD!"
"Well, while Knives goes to look for the ball, let's let Legato go." Milly said.
Knives grumbled as he stomped over to the fence and began to climb over it. Legato set his ball out on the green and shook The Great One.
"Master…how should I go about swinging the club?" Everyone groaned.
Stand over there…
Legato took two steps to the left. "Here, Master?"
No, to the right…
Legato moved over to the right. "Here, Master?"
Now move up…
Twenty minutes later, Meryl and the others finally heard a "FOUND IT!" from Knives and Legato was STILL trying to focus in on his swing.
"Here, Master?"
Now swing…
Legato tapped the ball gently, watching as it rolled towards the hole.
"Hey what's the hold up!?" Angry mobs of people began to gather behind Meryl and the others. They nervously ignored the enraged players as the ball FINALLY fell into the hole.
"Hole in one!" Legato told them as he went to retrieve the ball.
"Let's just move up to say…hole five?" Demonte suggested to Meryl, who nodded and told the others.
"Okay," Nick said, crossing off holes one through four. "Hole five."
"I'LL swing first this time," Vash told Demonte.
"Suit yourself," Demonte shrugged.
The fifth hole was played rather smoothly…until it became Knives' turn.
"Okay Knives," Vash explained. "The objective of the game is to NOT hit the ball out of bounds. Do you see that little hole over there?" Vash pointed to the hole a little ways down the green.
"Yes."
"Aim for that and don't hit so hard."
Knives stood straight, and prepared to swing. He hit the ball, which went bouncing off the course and landed in a bush.
"Ah! Yet ANOTHER two stroke penalty!" Nick marked off the score.
"Shut up!" Knives shouted. "I'll get it this time." Knives swung again and it landed on the far end of the course. "I will GET it…" He vowed.
Eighteen strokes later, Knives was STILL on the same hole, trying to get the ball into the hole.
"Knives you were supposed to stop after SIX strokes!" Demonte told him.
"SHUT UP! I'm NOT going to stop UNTIL I get this blasted ball into the hole!"
"Oh no, not THESE kids again!" The angry people from before were right behind Meryl and the group again. Everyone groaned as the enraged mob began to scream once again.
"AHA! I got it!" Knives cheered. "And it only took me twenty-two strokes!"
"My turn…" Legato said.
"Ohhhh noooo," Meryl grabbed his arm. "It'll be your turn over here…where the pirate ship is."
The sixth hole was on a pirate ship, surrounded by six feet of water.
"You definitely DON'T want to hit your ball into the water here…" Vash commented as he looked over the railing.
"Me first," Legato said as he pulled out The Great One. Demonte quickly took it from him and laughed. "The Great One said that he wanted you to figure this hole out for yourself, Legato."
Legato blinked, but nodded. He set the ball down on the ground and hit the ball hard. The ball was sent flying and Legato used his mind melding powers to bring the ball back onto the course, hitting people in the head and breaking windows and other things, and landed in the hole.
"Hole in one!" Legato cheered.
"…He cheated." Vash whispered to Nick.
"I have it under control…" Nick grinned as he wrote down a '20' under the score. "Heh, THAT'LL teach him."
"STAND ASIDE MORTALS!" Knives shouted as he pushed everyone out of the way and set the ball down on the green. He swung back and hit the ball. The ball arched and hit the side of the pirate ship, bouncing and hitting the mast.
The mast broke and fell down upon the boat.
"AHHH!" Everyone screamed as they watched the mast crack the ship in half. The side that Knives was on began to sink into the water while the other half began to pull away from the sinking half.
"Master!" Legato reached down to help Knives and Knives grabbed his arm…a little TOO hard. Legato was pulled into the water along with the sinking ship.
The ball, meanwhile, was not done causing havoc. After it hit the mast, it crashed through the floor of the floating side of the ship, springing a leak.
"That…can't be good…" Nick said. Everyone turned and made a break for the exit of the ship, but being so much in a hurry, no one could escape.
"HEY! QUIT PUSHING!"
"LET ME GO FIRST!"
"VASSSSH! THAT WAS MY FOOT!"
"Sorry, Meryl."
The ball was still bouncing, hitting the sides of the ship, and breaking all the windows of the pirate ship. Suddenly, the side that had hoarded all of the other Trigun cast members began to tip backwards and sink into the water.
"Um…I think that it is safe to say that…this isn't good." Nick watched as the ship began to tip over.
"I regret moving away from my town," Demonte sighed.
All at once, the ship plowed to the bottom of the pool, causing a massive chain reaction of extremely bad things. First off, as the ship sank to the bottom of the pool (sending all seven kids to their ultimate doom) a giant tsunami built up high above the pool's edge and crashed into the park.
As all became flooded and everyone's good time was ruined, the people began to panic, running from the golf course before they were consumed within the hefty flood. And simply put, everything that WAS run on electricity in the park…no longer worked. Meaning the power went out and half of the courses just quit working. Yeah. In other words, the fun was over for everyone.
Not to mention that because the water had overflowed and ruined all of the power circuits, the park resulted in a nice explosion from the main building and the fire soon fed to the outside courses and well, that was the end of miniature golf. ^_^
But we can't end the catastrophe here, can we?
"HEY! IT'S THOSE STUPID KIDS AGAIN!" Oh, look! Here comes the enraged mob. "THEY'RE HOGGING THE HOLE! SOMEONE CALL SECURITY!"
Legato found the scorecard under the water and looked at it.
"A 20!? YOU'RE CHEATING NICHOLAS!" He turned and used mind-melding powers on Nick.
"AHHH!!!!!!" Nick screamed as his arm jerked backwards.
Rem found the kids outside of the park, drenched and looking miserable. She rolled down the window, concerned, but obviously in a better mood. "What happened?" She asked. "What are you doing?"
"Trying to run from the cops," Knives muttered. "Miniature golf didn't go EXACTLY as planned, unfortunately."
"Can we go to the hotel room now?" Vash whined and Rem sighed.
"No one is getting in the car looking like that. Everyone jump into the back."
Everyone groaned as they hopped into the back. What a ROTTEN day. ^_^
LOL There's been too much plot lately and not enough stupidity so, HERE YA GO! R&R as always please…nicely and I'll get back to ya all soon!
BLD
