Howdy, folks! Here it is, the long-awaited, and much anticipated, fourth chapter of This Moment. Sorry it took so long, but I've been in depression, and A LOT of weird things have happened to me lately. The first sentence just hit me the other day, and I said to myself, there it is! The fourth chapter! Terribly sorry if it's too long, but I was on a role!
DISCLAIMER: don't own Stargate, poo-poo.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Chapter 4: Sam ran her hand over the dust-covered picture frame.
I know him, she thought as she touched the face in the picture, why can't I remember his name?
A voice broke into her thoughts.
"That's your dad, Sam."
Sam turned to see Colonel O'Neil behind her. "I still can't remember anything, Jack. It's so hard!"
Jack's heart skipped a beat whenever she called him Jack, and he almost wished that she would never get her memory back.
"Hey," he said reaching over to put an arm around her, which she gratefully snuggled up against. "It's okay. None of us expect you to get your memory back that soon. These things take time. Which we have a lot of, so.. keep looking. Maybe going into your room will help?"
She smiled up at him, and he was sure that his heart had stopped,"That's a good idea. I'll go there now."
She stepped from his embrace and into the hallway. She stopped and seemed to be in thought. Just when Jack was going to point her room out to her, she turned to it, and went in. Jack decided to stay in the living room and wait for her.
It's probably better that I'm out here anyway, Jack reasoned to himself, I only came with her to give her some help when she needed it-right?
Sam entered her room cautiously, unsure of what was going to happen. What she saw was a neat-as-a-pin room, with everything in its proper place. She went over to her closet, opened the door, and saw the same was with her clothes. Everything neatly lined up, by color and by season. Most of her clothes were in garment bags.
Looking at this now,Sam thought, it makes me sick. Once I get my memory back... why don't I just do it now? Jack said we had plenty of time. I can reorganize my entire closet so that way it looks like a normal person's!
Sam laughed, and began pulling boxes from the top shelf. One fell on her head, and black, leather-bound book fell open on the floor.
Hmmm, what's this? It looks like a journal. It could be mine... I should probably read this. It could help me with my memory-loss!
She opened the journal to a random entry and began to read:
"14 Feb 04: Dear Jack (Jack?! Sam thought, Why would I write Dear Jack?), You surprised me today, Jack. I wasn't expecting all those decorations and the giant banner and all the stuffed animals and the flowers and the candy... I wasn't expecting any of it. But I love you even more for it. To think Jack, to think that... if it weren't for those stupid regulations, we could be happy together. It's not like we aren't now, but we aren't. I sigh for you Jack. I sigh for me. I sigh for us. I love you, Jack O'Neil. There's truly no one quite like you."
Sam dropped the book to the floor in disbelief. She grabbed her bed post to steady herself.
I remember that, Sam smiled, and looking around the room, she noticed that a lot of what she had, Jack had given her. I love him. Or I'm supposed to. I can't love him if I don't remember feeling love for him. Oh, it would be terrible if I fell in love with someone else and then got my memory back!
Jack stood in the doorway.
"You okay, Sam? You've been in here for quite awhile," he looked concerned for her, and Sam felt her heart leap.
Why did my heart just do that? Sam tried to figure out what was going on with her. Maybe I do remember loving him or... maybe my heart does, but my mind doesn't.
"Yea, I'm fine. Just trying to reorganize my closet. I realized I don't like it the way it is. I was pulling down some boxes, and I found this."
Sam bent over, and picked up the black book. "It's my journal." She handed it out to Jack, but he pushed it away.
"I can't read this, Sam. Besides, it's not my memory that needs to come back."
She smiled at him faintly, and then put the book on her bed.
"You hungry? I'm famished. We could go down to O'Malley's, that's this bar that we love going to... Hey, what's the matter?"
Sam's face turned as she tried to hide her tear-stained face from his prying eyes. "You wouldn't understand."
Jack reached out and grabbed her shoulder, turning her to face him. His heart dropped when he saw her tears. "You don't know what I don't understand, Sam. Tell me. I'm here for you. You know that."
He pulled her into a hug, and she let the tears fall, soaking his jacket and shirt.
"Jack... it's... so much to take in all at once. Realizing that you don't remember anything, and then finding out that you have all these people who care about you, and know about your life, but you don't. Then, you fall in love with the guy you're supposed to be in love with in the first place, but you don't remember loving him. Ever. It hurts, Jack, it hurts so much."
Sam looked up into his chocolate-brown eyes, and she felt more love than she ever thought was humanly possible.
What's it about him that just drives me insane? Sam mused. I'm supposed to be a scientific genius; why can't I figure this out?
Revelation smacked Sam upside the head in an instant.
Maybe this is a second chance. Maybe... I'm supposed to start my life over. Leave the Air Force, do something else. But... what'll become of Jack.. and our relationship? I have a second chance.. this could be the only way that we can be together....
Sam smiled, and Jack sighed with relief. She had gotten a faraway look on her face, and Jack wasn't sure what to do.
"Are you okay, Sam? I mean, if this is going to be a problem for you, we can always go back to the SGC."
"No!" Sam said abruptly, but flashing a killer smile covered it up. "What were you saying about O'Malley's?"
"It's this bar that we, being SG-1, love going to. I thought if you were hungry we could go there. It's also a place that can bring back memories. It does that for me all the time," Jack gave a little laugh and squeezed Sam's hand.
"Sure. I'd love to go, and I am kind of hungry," Sam gave a responsive squeeze to Jack's hand, and pulled him to the doorway. "You coming or not?"
Jack laughed, and followed Sam out of the room, pulling her door closed behind him.
*~*~*
Sam sank into the plush seating of "SG-1's" booth in O'Malley's, and looked at her surroundings.
"Nice place. I can kind of see why we come here a lot," she said as a tall, handsome, strapping man seated himself across from her.
"Oh, and that would be?" the man said.
"The scenery," she laughed, gesturing to him.
"Scenery, huh, Sam? So what do I get to be, a topiary? And whatever I am, it has to be higher rank than you are."
"Whatever, Jack," she laughed again, and stopped talking as a waitress came to get their orders. She looked at Jack in concern, not knowing what she liked.
Jack nodded in confirmation, and Sam was glad he was with her. Knowing her mental state, she'd probably order something that she hated, or something that she was allergic to and end up poisoning herself.
While Jack gave their order, Sam glanced around the bar once again. Something struck her as familiar, and she wanted the memory to surface before she lost the feeling.
Suddenly, all it once, it came to her.
It was a memory of having the armbands that increased SG-1's strength and speed, and of having a barroom brawl with Jack defending Sam because some guy was getting in her face. She remembered all the feelings she had, the anger that she held inside her, and how satisfying it was to here her opponent's nose crack beneath her fist.
A black out washed over her, and Sam grabbed the edge of the table to steady herself.
Jack reached out to steady her, and held her hand until the black out passed.
"Sam," he said, his voice coated with concern for her, "Sam, are you alright? It was another one of those black-outs, wasn't it?"
She nodded faintly, and opened her eyes slowly, still clutching the table and Jack's hand.
"You want to talk about what you remembered?"
Sam shook her head, and asked to be excused.
Just when Jack was going to get up, she held out her hand to stop him. "I remember where the bathroom is, Jack. Just... wait for me here, okay?"
He nodded, and she strode off to the restroom.
Once inside the safety of the sinks and the toilets, Sam sunk to floor on her knees. Tears broke again, and uncontrollable sobs racked her body. She let loose a wave of emotion that she was sure she could not hold any longer. She stopped, and the last few hiccups and sobs subsided. She stood up, hastily composed herself and checked her makeup in the mirror.
How can I keep this from Jack? How could I have kept this from everyone at the SGC? Isn't it obvious now? Why didn't I tell anyone? Especially Jack. He should know.
Sam turned sideways in the mirror and checked her reflection.
It's not that obvious. No wonder why no one caught on.
She turned, and left the restroom, plastering a smile on her face that she hoped covered the fact that she remembered something that no one else even knew about.
Jack caught her eye as she emerged from the crowd and waved her to their table.
How can I keep this from him? He needs to know. Jack.... Oh, Jack! What am I going to do?
*~*~*
Ahh, the fourth chapter complete. You know what that means don't you? It's your turn to review! Come on, move your little pointer down to the left-hand side of you screen, press "go" You know you want to! : )
DISCLAIMER: don't own Stargate, poo-poo.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Chapter 4: Sam ran her hand over the dust-covered picture frame.
I know him, she thought as she touched the face in the picture, why can't I remember his name?
A voice broke into her thoughts.
"That's your dad, Sam."
Sam turned to see Colonel O'Neil behind her. "I still can't remember anything, Jack. It's so hard!"
Jack's heart skipped a beat whenever she called him Jack, and he almost wished that she would never get her memory back.
"Hey," he said reaching over to put an arm around her, which she gratefully snuggled up against. "It's okay. None of us expect you to get your memory back that soon. These things take time. Which we have a lot of, so.. keep looking. Maybe going into your room will help?"
She smiled up at him, and he was sure that his heart had stopped,"That's a good idea. I'll go there now."
She stepped from his embrace and into the hallway. She stopped and seemed to be in thought. Just when Jack was going to point her room out to her, she turned to it, and went in. Jack decided to stay in the living room and wait for her.
It's probably better that I'm out here anyway, Jack reasoned to himself, I only came with her to give her some help when she needed it-right?
Sam entered her room cautiously, unsure of what was going to happen. What she saw was a neat-as-a-pin room, with everything in its proper place. She went over to her closet, opened the door, and saw the same was with her clothes. Everything neatly lined up, by color and by season. Most of her clothes were in garment bags.
Looking at this now,Sam thought, it makes me sick. Once I get my memory back... why don't I just do it now? Jack said we had plenty of time. I can reorganize my entire closet so that way it looks like a normal person's!
Sam laughed, and began pulling boxes from the top shelf. One fell on her head, and black, leather-bound book fell open on the floor.
Hmmm, what's this? It looks like a journal. It could be mine... I should probably read this. It could help me with my memory-loss!
She opened the journal to a random entry and began to read:
"14 Feb 04: Dear Jack (Jack?! Sam thought, Why would I write Dear Jack?), You surprised me today, Jack. I wasn't expecting all those decorations and the giant banner and all the stuffed animals and the flowers and the candy... I wasn't expecting any of it. But I love you even more for it. To think Jack, to think that... if it weren't for those stupid regulations, we could be happy together. It's not like we aren't now, but we aren't. I sigh for you Jack. I sigh for me. I sigh for us. I love you, Jack O'Neil. There's truly no one quite like you."
Sam dropped the book to the floor in disbelief. She grabbed her bed post to steady herself.
I remember that, Sam smiled, and looking around the room, she noticed that a lot of what she had, Jack had given her. I love him. Or I'm supposed to. I can't love him if I don't remember feeling love for him. Oh, it would be terrible if I fell in love with someone else and then got my memory back!
Jack stood in the doorway.
"You okay, Sam? You've been in here for quite awhile," he looked concerned for her, and Sam felt her heart leap.
Why did my heart just do that? Sam tried to figure out what was going on with her. Maybe I do remember loving him or... maybe my heart does, but my mind doesn't.
"Yea, I'm fine. Just trying to reorganize my closet. I realized I don't like it the way it is. I was pulling down some boxes, and I found this."
Sam bent over, and picked up the black book. "It's my journal." She handed it out to Jack, but he pushed it away.
"I can't read this, Sam. Besides, it's not my memory that needs to come back."
She smiled at him faintly, and then put the book on her bed.
"You hungry? I'm famished. We could go down to O'Malley's, that's this bar that we love going to... Hey, what's the matter?"
Sam's face turned as she tried to hide her tear-stained face from his prying eyes. "You wouldn't understand."
Jack reached out and grabbed her shoulder, turning her to face him. His heart dropped when he saw her tears. "You don't know what I don't understand, Sam. Tell me. I'm here for you. You know that."
He pulled her into a hug, and she let the tears fall, soaking his jacket and shirt.
"Jack... it's... so much to take in all at once. Realizing that you don't remember anything, and then finding out that you have all these people who care about you, and know about your life, but you don't. Then, you fall in love with the guy you're supposed to be in love with in the first place, but you don't remember loving him. Ever. It hurts, Jack, it hurts so much."
Sam looked up into his chocolate-brown eyes, and she felt more love than she ever thought was humanly possible.
What's it about him that just drives me insane? Sam mused. I'm supposed to be a scientific genius; why can't I figure this out?
Revelation smacked Sam upside the head in an instant.
Maybe this is a second chance. Maybe... I'm supposed to start my life over. Leave the Air Force, do something else. But... what'll become of Jack.. and our relationship? I have a second chance.. this could be the only way that we can be together....
Sam smiled, and Jack sighed with relief. She had gotten a faraway look on her face, and Jack wasn't sure what to do.
"Are you okay, Sam? I mean, if this is going to be a problem for you, we can always go back to the SGC."
"No!" Sam said abruptly, but flashing a killer smile covered it up. "What were you saying about O'Malley's?"
"It's this bar that we, being SG-1, love going to. I thought if you were hungry we could go there. It's also a place that can bring back memories. It does that for me all the time," Jack gave a little laugh and squeezed Sam's hand.
"Sure. I'd love to go, and I am kind of hungry," Sam gave a responsive squeeze to Jack's hand, and pulled him to the doorway. "You coming or not?"
Jack laughed, and followed Sam out of the room, pulling her door closed behind him.
*~*~*
Sam sank into the plush seating of "SG-1's" booth in O'Malley's, and looked at her surroundings.
"Nice place. I can kind of see why we come here a lot," she said as a tall, handsome, strapping man seated himself across from her.
"Oh, and that would be?" the man said.
"The scenery," she laughed, gesturing to him.
"Scenery, huh, Sam? So what do I get to be, a topiary? And whatever I am, it has to be higher rank than you are."
"Whatever, Jack," she laughed again, and stopped talking as a waitress came to get their orders. She looked at Jack in concern, not knowing what she liked.
Jack nodded in confirmation, and Sam was glad he was with her. Knowing her mental state, she'd probably order something that she hated, or something that she was allergic to and end up poisoning herself.
While Jack gave their order, Sam glanced around the bar once again. Something struck her as familiar, and she wanted the memory to surface before she lost the feeling.
Suddenly, all it once, it came to her.
It was a memory of having the armbands that increased SG-1's strength and speed, and of having a barroom brawl with Jack defending Sam because some guy was getting in her face. She remembered all the feelings she had, the anger that she held inside her, and how satisfying it was to here her opponent's nose crack beneath her fist.
A black out washed over her, and Sam grabbed the edge of the table to steady herself.
Jack reached out to steady her, and held her hand until the black out passed.
"Sam," he said, his voice coated with concern for her, "Sam, are you alright? It was another one of those black-outs, wasn't it?"
She nodded faintly, and opened her eyes slowly, still clutching the table and Jack's hand.
"You want to talk about what you remembered?"
Sam shook her head, and asked to be excused.
Just when Jack was going to get up, she held out her hand to stop him. "I remember where the bathroom is, Jack. Just... wait for me here, okay?"
He nodded, and she strode off to the restroom.
Once inside the safety of the sinks and the toilets, Sam sunk to floor on her knees. Tears broke again, and uncontrollable sobs racked her body. She let loose a wave of emotion that she was sure she could not hold any longer. She stopped, and the last few hiccups and sobs subsided. She stood up, hastily composed herself and checked her makeup in the mirror.
How can I keep this from Jack? How could I have kept this from everyone at the SGC? Isn't it obvious now? Why didn't I tell anyone? Especially Jack. He should know.
Sam turned sideways in the mirror and checked her reflection.
It's not that obvious. No wonder why no one caught on.
She turned, and left the restroom, plastering a smile on her face that she hoped covered the fact that she remembered something that no one else even knew about.
Jack caught her eye as she emerged from the crowd and waved her to their table.
How can I keep this from him? He needs to know. Jack.... Oh, Jack! What am I going to do?
*~*~*
Ahh, the fourth chapter complete. You know what that means don't you? It's your turn to review! Come on, move your little pointer down to the left-hand side of you screen, press "go" You know you want to! : )