Even In Death
A/N: hehe! I am really cooking with gas on this one now! This is the fourth chappie, told from Shuyin's POV. He's gone... kinda crazy. But you'll all read about that! This -- much to Peeping Shadow Monkey's pleasure, I am sure -- does not take place in the Macalania woods, as the previous chapters, so BE HAPPY AND REVIEW! (PS- the song is by Evanescence) And, to appease the goddess, no names, I will try to make my chapters slightly longer, if I can. Sometimes there is just nothing more to say, ya know?
Give me a reason to believe that you're gone
I see your shadow so I know they're all wrong
Moonlight on the soft brown earth
It leads me to where you lay
They took you away from me but now I'm taking you home
The field was bright, the orange looking like a sunset. This place was pure beauty, magnificant. I stood in the center, one arm outstretched. "Where are you?" I scream. Isn't the Farplane a place to get answers, a place where you can find peace, resolution? No answer meets my ears, no shadows grace my eyes.
I need him. He knows that. I ran straight here after what I saw him do, and I knew he was not sent, so he would not be here. Only the saved get to go to heaven, paradise. My Tidus never was sent, there has not even been enough time for him to be. I had to do something, and maybe if I prayed hard enough here he would come back to me, maybe I could sort of send him myself, if I put effort into it.
Nothing was impossible.
Pray, pray, pray. Nothing is working! Where is he? I need to, HAVE TO, see him one last time. I knew what he was doing, why he was running. He thought he was so alone, so frail, but he was dead wrong. Everyone has their moments of weakness! Why did he think that no one could feel, share, his pain?
"Tidus!" I screamed, called, choked out. I fell to my knees, the grass softening my fall. "TIDUS!" There was an edge in my voice. He was not gone, HE WAS NOT GONE HE WAS NOT GONE HE WAS NOT GONE!
My body fell forward, completely onto the grass. There were flowers in my faces, things of pure and total wonder, but I wanted to smash them. I suddenly wanted to destroy this place, I wanted to kill the beauty, destroy what others cherished. This place was nothing to me, this place was poisoned to me, this place was nothing good, noting pure, nothing saintly. Anger made my body convulse and I could not move, I would not move, not now, not ever. Not until this place was as dead as my heart, not until I had made this terrible wrong right.
Tears flowed down my cheeks, falling directly to the ground. My hair fell into my face, sheilding my view of the flowers, and my anger abated, slightly. There was something very wrong about everything, something that I could not point out.
Someone was responsible for this.
The thought came to me clear, completely. Something had changed in Tidus, I could tell from the look in his eyes, from the anger in his touch. Someone had done SOMETHING to my Tidus, something horrible. Who was responsible for this and how the fuck could I repay the favor?
Someone was responible, so someone could pay.
I will stay forever here with you
My love
The softly spoken words you gave me
Even in death our love goes on
There it was, and I had a plan. But I could still not move. Something told me that my time here was not yet done and soon I would find out what I needed. What my plan was, that would appear to me soon enough.
My body still shook with the tears. I tried again, saying "Tidus," but this time, softer, the strength leaving both my body and my convictions.
"Tidus..."
"Tidus..."
"Tidus..."
Things echoed around me. I brushed the hair out of my eyes in one quick jerk of my hand, and I sat up quickly. Voices called out to me, shadows of things reached for me. The Farplane was going crazy, and I was at its center. Someone once told me that the Farplane could be a dangerous place, a place where strong emotions called out to the things that inhabited it. Anger, rage, all that gave the beings power. And I had just opened up a well.
The orange light flickered, flashed. It went out for a moment, then it came back. In the varying motions of the light I saw people moving around. I saw figures, I saw people, I saw the dead and the damned. Even the damned were saved here, and yet my Tidus is not. Things brushed my hair, played along my skin, made my bones chill.
"TIDUS!" I screamed, freaking out. I wanted out of here, I wanted out now, and I would do almost anything at this point to achieve that. There was something still keeping me there, something that I could not name, that wanted me.
I only wanted to feel his touch, feel his skin slide along mine, feel his lips on mine, his body clench around me as I entered him. Colors flashed in my eyes, dizzying me and sending me off balance.
Suddenly everything was quiet. The colors stopped, the shadows disappeared.
One word was whispered to me from the darkness.
"Baralai."
Some say I'm crazy for my love, Oh my love
But no bonds can hold me from your side, Oh my love
They don't know you can't leave me
They don't hear you singing to me
Tidus, I love you. I always will, and, no matter what happens on this night, I know that we will be together. We will be one again, we will be whole. We will be able to leave this place, maybe even leave Spira completely. Maybe, mayeb not.
But I will have my revenge, and it will be sweet.
And I can't love you, anymore than I do
I will die, but real love is forever.
A/N: hehe! I am really cooking with gas on this one now! This is the fourth chappie, told from Shuyin's POV. He's gone... kinda crazy. But you'll all read about that! This -- much to Peeping Shadow Monkey's pleasure, I am sure -- does not take place in the Macalania woods, as the previous chapters, so BE HAPPY AND REVIEW! (PS- the song is by Evanescence) And, to appease the goddess, no names, I will try to make my chapters slightly longer, if I can. Sometimes there is just nothing more to say, ya know?
Give me a reason to believe that you're gone
I see your shadow so I know they're all wrong
Moonlight on the soft brown earth
It leads me to where you lay
They took you away from me but now I'm taking you home
The field was bright, the orange looking like a sunset. This place was pure beauty, magnificant. I stood in the center, one arm outstretched. "Where are you?" I scream. Isn't the Farplane a place to get answers, a place where you can find peace, resolution? No answer meets my ears, no shadows grace my eyes.
I need him. He knows that. I ran straight here after what I saw him do, and I knew he was not sent, so he would not be here. Only the saved get to go to heaven, paradise. My Tidus never was sent, there has not even been enough time for him to be. I had to do something, and maybe if I prayed hard enough here he would come back to me, maybe I could sort of send him myself, if I put effort into it.
Nothing was impossible.
Pray, pray, pray. Nothing is working! Where is he? I need to, HAVE TO, see him one last time. I knew what he was doing, why he was running. He thought he was so alone, so frail, but he was dead wrong. Everyone has their moments of weakness! Why did he think that no one could feel, share, his pain?
"Tidus!" I screamed, called, choked out. I fell to my knees, the grass softening my fall. "TIDUS!" There was an edge in my voice. He was not gone, HE WAS NOT GONE HE WAS NOT GONE HE WAS NOT GONE!
My body fell forward, completely onto the grass. There were flowers in my faces, things of pure and total wonder, but I wanted to smash them. I suddenly wanted to destroy this place, I wanted to kill the beauty, destroy what others cherished. This place was nothing to me, this place was poisoned to me, this place was nothing good, noting pure, nothing saintly. Anger made my body convulse and I could not move, I would not move, not now, not ever. Not until this place was as dead as my heart, not until I had made this terrible wrong right.
Tears flowed down my cheeks, falling directly to the ground. My hair fell into my face, sheilding my view of the flowers, and my anger abated, slightly. There was something very wrong about everything, something that I could not point out.
Someone was responsible for this.
The thought came to me clear, completely. Something had changed in Tidus, I could tell from the look in his eyes, from the anger in his touch. Someone had done SOMETHING to my Tidus, something horrible. Who was responsible for this and how the fuck could I repay the favor?
Someone was responible, so someone could pay.
I will stay forever here with you
My love
The softly spoken words you gave me
Even in death our love goes on
There it was, and I had a plan. But I could still not move. Something told me that my time here was not yet done and soon I would find out what I needed. What my plan was, that would appear to me soon enough.
My body still shook with the tears. I tried again, saying "Tidus," but this time, softer, the strength leaving both my body and my convictions.
"Tidus..."
"Tidus..."
"Tidus..."
Things echoed around me. I brushed the hair out of my eyes in one quick jerk of my hand, and I sat up quickly. Voices called out to me, shadows of things reached for me. The Farplane was going crazy, and I was at its center. Someone once told me that the Farplane could be a dangerous place, a place where strong emotions called out to the things that inhabited it. Anger, rage, all that gave the beings power. And I had just opened up a well.
The orange light flickered, flashed. It went out for a moment, then it came back. In the varying motions of the light I saw people moving around. I saw figures, I saw people, I saw the dead and the damned. Even the damned were saved here, and yet my Tidus is not. Things brushed my hair, played along my skin, made my bones chill.
"TIDUS!" I screamed, freaking out. I wanted out of here, I wanted out now, and I would do almost anything at this point to achieve that. There was something still keeping me there, something that I could not name, that wanted me.
I only wanted to feel his touch, feel his skin slide along mine, feel his lips on mine, his body clench around me as I entered him. Colors flashed in my eyes, dizzying me and sending me off balance.
Suddenly everything was quiet. The colors stopped, the shadows disappeared.
One word was whispered to me from the darkness.
"Baralai."
Some say I'm crazy for my love, Oh my love
But no bonds can hold me from your side, Oh my love
They don't know you can't leave me
They don't hear you singing to me
Tidus, I love you. I always will, and, no matter what happens on this night, I know that we will be together. We will be one again, we will be whole. We will be able to leave this place, maybe even leave Spira completely. Maybe, mayeb not.
But I will have my revenge, and it will be sweet.
And I can't love you, anymore than I do
I will die, but real love is forever.