Author's Note: You guys read too fast…I'm only writing Chapter Ten and I'm already posting Chapter Eight? You guys are going too fast! But I still appreciate all of your reviews. Thank you, The wise. Thanks a bunch, PasifiKStaR, you are a constant reviewer. I feel so touched that you like my story…*sniff*…okay, enough sniffling.
Please allow me to use this Author's Note to thank my reviewers for my latest songfic (midific) "Denial". Thanks to emina, Redneck Girl and Mia1218. Those reviewers made that one hour worth it. And I have to add Teletha to the people who reviewed my other midific "Inside Your Eyes".
Chapter Eight
"We sleep in the same room?" Rinoa asked when they reached Seifer's mansion. It was already evening. They had spent the rest of the day, ever since they got to Deling City, at the hospital, visiting Rinoa's father. Now was the only time she actually saw where she would be living.
"Well, I thought it would be better," he said. "But if it makes you uncomfortable…"
"No. It's okay," she answered. He had some servants bring her things to the room and he watched as she unpacked. Not once did she let go of the doll.
Once she was done and the servants had left, she sat on the bed and he did so as well. "Rinoa…um…" Seifer said.
She looked at him. And he sighed. "Look, I know it must be hard for you…but….but you must know that you and…uh…"
"Squall?" she said.
"Yes, Squall," he nodded. "You and Squall were never really together. There was never anything between the two of you. So…"
"I understand, Seifer," she told him. "And I'm sorry about the way I acted. I…I guess I just couldn't believe that everything I was told was a lie."
He held her and she let herself rest in his embrace. He was what she had now. But she shouldn't keep thinking about Squall. Her eyes fell on the chocobo she held. 'Don't forget me.' He had said that. She sighed.
"Seifer?" she said.
"Yes, Rinoa?" he asked.
"I'm tired," she replied softly. "I'll take a shower then I'll sleep, okay?" Seifer nodded and Rinoa went into the bathroom. Seifer picked up the chocobo doll just as he heard the water start running. "What's so special about you?" he asked.
He squeezed it hard and it said, "I love you."
He frowned at it. He placed it on top of the shelf and lay on the bed. Half an hour later, Rinoa stepped out of the bathroom, wrapped in a towel, and the first thing she said was, "Where did the chocobo doll go?" Seifer pointed to the top of the shelf.
"Don't put it there," she said with a small frown. "It will get dirty." She reached up to get it and hugged it a little before placing it again on the bed.
"I don't like what it says," Seifer said.
"I do," she told him. "So don't do anything to it."
"Rinoa, it's just a doll," he insisted.
"It's a special doll," Rinoa retorted. She started to get dressed and Seifer just watched wondering if Squall had done anything to Rinoa. Or if Squall had ever seen her naked, if Squall had ever touched her. He himself had never had the satisfaction of holding her and making love to her. But he thought it wasn't the time to ask. "Rinoa," he began. "Would you like to take a walk with me tomorrow?"
"Okay," she answered.
"Good," he said. "Then I can start helping you get your memory back. The doctors said it will come in time, I just have to tell you a couple of things and then it will start coming back to you little by little. They said it wouldn't take very long"
Rinoa slipped the short nightdress over her head and sat at the dresser to dry her hair. "Seifer," she said softly.
"Hm?" he asked.
"Did you miss me?" she queried.
Seifer looked at her reflection in the mirror and smiled, "Of course. I was worried about you, Rinoa. I was afraid that something had happened to you."
"I can't wait until I remember everything," she said. "I don't want to live knowing lies. I want to know the truth. Promise me, Seifer, that everything you say will be real."
"I promise…" he assured her.
- : - : - : -
Three months had passed since she had gone. No one in Balamb Garden dared speak about it in front of Squall. Once again, the commander's only company was Zell, who didn't seem to care that Rinoa had been a lie. Squall was just thankful that his father had known nothing about this incident and Seifer – Rinoa had probably persuaded him – had decided to hold off any charges he was planning to have again Squall.
"Hey, stop thinking about it already," Zell told Squall. "It's been three whole months. I think it's time you get her out of your head and move on. Rinoa is not the only girl in the world, Squall. There are other fish in the sea."
"No one else is like her, Zell," Squall said. "I hate to admit it but…I miss her."
"This isn't like you, Squall. You don't even get enough sleep anymore and I'm sure it's because you're thinking of Rinoa," Zell said, shaking his head. "Or maybe you've been working too hard. Well, whatever it is, I'll go talk to the headmaster and tell him you need a break. A nice, peaceful place will be good for you."
"Whatever," said Squall.
"No, you need it," Zell insisted.
"I don't need it," Squall muttered.
Zell shook his head. "Sure you do. A nice vacation will do wonders for you."
Squall sighed but didn't say anything more. Maybe a vacation would help.
A few hours later, Squall was called to the Headmaster's office.
"Squall," Cid began. "Zell told me you've been having problems lately. He says you still have your mind on Rinoa and you lack sleep. And I'm not surprised if you say you're pretty stressed out by everything."
"So you really are going to send me on a vacation, aren't you?" Squall asked. Cid nodded and said, "If it's fine with you, tomorrow you will go to Winhill and rest there for a week."
"Whatever," he answered. "I couldn't really care any less."
"Oh, and Quistis will be going with you," said Cid.
"Why?" Squall questioned.
"Just to watch you," the Headmaster replied. "Now go get your things ready. You will leave tomorrow morning. Nida will have the Ragnarok ready."
Squall got up and left. He went into his room and decided to pack. He placed his suitcase on the bed and started tossing clothes into it, not really caring what he got. He used to be neater with his things but lately he had just been so careless. He had changed every since Rinoa had come and gone from his life.
At the bottom of his messy pile of clothes, he saw a very small blue book, small enough to fit in his pocket, with wings on the front. It was locked but beside it he found the key, which was colored silver and also had wing designs on it. He opened it and saw a letter. His name was written in script in Rinoa's hand on the envelope.
He took the letter out of the envelope and read;
Hi, Squall,
I hope you do end up finding this, but with your careless nature maybe not. But if you're reading this letter, I guess you found my diary.
I don't really want to go with Seifer. I had fun with you, Squall. I don't really care that you lied. I love you, and I don't think that would change so easily.
You can read my diary now. Remember that I told you the first time you saw it that it was personal and I'd never let you read it? No, maybe you've forgotten. I never let you see it again after that anyway. But now that I have to go, I want you to go through these pages and remember all the times you had with me.
I want you to see everything in my point of view. I want you to know what I was thinking while I was with you. You see, whenever I was by your side and I looked in your eyes, I kept wondering what made you so silent and uncertain all the time. I think I understand now. You didn't want to lose me, did you? You were scared. I never thought you would ever be scared. You always struck me as strong and brave. But when you saw me crying and you saw Seifer, I realized just how scared you were. Haha! That must sound really strange.
Oh yeah. Lastly, just so you know; your angel now believes there is more to her lion's heart than she thought there was. I wish I was given more time to be with you…
Lovingly yours,
Rinoa
Squall read the letter once more before folding it and putting it back in the envelope. He picked up the diary and looked at it for a while before opening it and slowly reading the words Rinoa had written inside. As he read, he couldn't help but smile.