Sandy and Kirsten left Dr. Colefield's office and headed over to the Harbor
School to pick Ryan up. They figured they would get there around the same
time he would be getting out of detention, and they would be able to save
him the walk home. They were both quiet, deep in their own thoughts about
what Dr. Colefield had told them.
Kirsten finally spoke first,
"You think she'll really be able to help Ryan that much?"
Sandy thought about it for a minute and then told her,
"Yes. I do. Why? Don't you?"
Kirsten shrugged. She liked Dr. Colefield, and she seemed genuine in her concerns and her advise about Ryan, but Kirsten wasn't sure she agreed with everything Dr. Colefield recommended.
So Kirsten told Sandy,
"I think so. I'm just not sure if we should hide the investigation from Ryan. If he finds out about it from somewhere else before we get a chance to tell him, he's going to be devastated."
"Until we know more, I think Dr. Colefield is right." Sandy told her, "There is no way for Ryan to find out about it before we tell him. Remember, it hasn't even begun yet. And as soon as it does, we will talk to Ryan."
Then Sandy continued,
"What about Luke and his friends? Are you going to give in there?"
Another topic Kirsten didn't completely agree with Dr. Colefield about.
"I don't know. I'm not really sure yet. I just don't like those kids, but I do agree I can't expect Ryan to act like Seth. Just because Seth wouldn't choose them as friends, I guess I can't expect Ryan to agree. Ryan is athletic. He plays sports. I guess it stands to reason he'd make friends with other athletes. If you don't mind, I'd like to talk to Ryan alone on that one. See what he says to me before I make up my mind."
Sandy nodded and told her,
"That's fine. I don't think you should talk to him tonight about it, though. Tonight I'd like to talk to him about the other things Dr. Colefield brought up. Continuing with the therapy, wanting to be his parents, the money. Those are all more important issues to address. If we try to hit him with everything, we'll just overwhelm him. Let's start with the big things, and work down from there."
"You're right," Kirsten said, "I just can't believe Ryan would equate love with money. He's got to know that we don't need the money, and that we took him in for other reasons."
Sandy just sighed,
"I guess we never really explained those reasons to him. Not in terms that he understood, apparently. But we will. Tonight."
Kirsten picked up her cell phone,
"Well, I'm going to order from La Rocca's. That should help put him in a better mood since he loves Mexican. Then we can talk to him after dinner."
They spotted Ryan as they pulled in, on the other side of the school parking lot. He was talking to Luke, and the two of them were heading towards Luke's truck.
"I still can't believe you'd blow off just one class," Ryan was telling Luke, "It doesn't seem worth it. Now you have detention for just one class. If you're going to cut, why not bang out the whole day?"
Luke just laughed,
"It was Bio. I hate that class. Besides, it's right before my free period, so to me, it was worth it. Hey, you wanna stop somewhere before we go home? What time do your folks get home from work?"
Despite their previous drunken confessions about therapy, Ryan still wasn't comfortable with the idea of Luke knowing he was now seeing a therapist.
"They're not at work," Ryan told him, "so I don't know what time they'll be getting home. I'm guessing tonight wouldn't be a good idea. Maybe tomorrow, but you know, thanks for the ride."
Luke saw Sandy and Kirsten first as they were pulling into a parking space. He pointed over to them and told Ryan,
"Hey, isn't that them over there?"
Ryan turned to where Luke was pointing,
"Yeah, that's them. Damn, I guess they really don't trust me now. Now they're coming to pick me up just to make sure I come home."
At the same time, he was also thinking, what the hell did Dr. Colefield say to them to make them come here to get me?
Luke just patted Ryan on the back. He really felt for the guy.
"Give it time, man," Luke told him, "They'll get over it. See ya tomorrow."
Luke headed off towards his truck, and Ryan walked over to the car. He got in without saying much. Sandy tried to explain to him that they finished up early and thought he'd like a ride home instead of walking, and Kirsten told him about getting dinner from La Rocca's. Neither of them said anything about Luke, and Ryan didn't say anything at all. He figured whatever they discussed with Dr. Colefield, they'd want to discuss with him. He just wasn't looking forward to that discussion.
Ryan remained quiet throughout most of dinner, but he noticed that Kirsten and Sandy were quiet, too. Only Seth talked. Occasionally everyone laughed, because Seth's latest Summer story was pretty funny, but besides that, no one else seemed to want to add to the conversation. After dinner, Seth made a quick exit, knowing that the next conversation wasn't going to include him. He figured he'd just eavesdrop from the top of the stairs.
After he heard Seth head up the stairs, Ryan turned to Kirsten and Sandy and said,
"I take it I shouldn't try to make the same exit as Seth."
"No, you shouldn't." Sandy told him, "We need to talk."
Ryan let out a big sigh, and looked down at his hands,
"Yeah, well, I figured as much. So, what did she say?"
"First, wait." Sandy said as he stood up and walked out of the kitchen. Ryan wasn't sure but he thought he heard Sandy in the office. When Sandy came back, he dropped what appeared to be a bankbook in front of Ryan. Ryan picked it up and saw that it was for a bank account. It was in his name, and contained a few thousand dollars.
"What's this?" He asked.
"This is a savings account. One of your savings accounts." Sandy started to explain.
But Kirsten interrupted him,
"Ryan, we're sorry. It never dawned on us that you would know about the checks that are sent here each month."
"When they come," Sandy continued to explain, "they are deposited into this account. Your account. I know it's your money, but we thought it was better to put it all in the bank for your future. We'll turn the account over to you when you turn 18. Until then, you're stuck depending on us, the same as Seth. Well, except during the summer, then you're free to get another part time job if you want."
"I don't get it," Ryan said, still staring at the bankbook, "This isn't my money. The state pays you this money for my care. I mean, I know it doesn't cover everything you guys do for me, but it helps cover some of the costs. I can't take it. It's yours."
With that, Ryan pushed the account book towards Sandy. Sandy didn't pick it up, instead he told Ryan,
"Ryan, no one is going to pay us to take care of you. The state sends us this money, but what we do with it is up to us. We decided it should go to you."
"But...." Ryan started.
Kirsten interrupted him,
"No buts, Ryan. No one pays us to take care of Seth, and no one is going to pay us to take care of you."
"But I'm not Seth." Ryan told her.
Kirsten laughed,
"And thank God for small favors. We already have a Seth. We don't need two."
Ryan tried to explain again what he meant,
"No, I mean, Seth is your son. He belongs here."
Before he could continue, Sandy interrupted him,
"Ryan...."
"No, let me finish," Ryan told him, "You can't compare me to Seth. It's not possible. He's your son. He always has been, and he always will be. Nothing can change that. Look, I know what you're saying, and believe me, I've thought about what Dr. Colefield said. And as much as I appreciate everything you do for me, it could all change tomorrow. I know it, and you know it. We all know it."
"Ryan," Sandy said, "You could leave tomorrow, but that wouldn't change the way we feel about you. Yes, Seth is our son, and has been for the past 16 years, and he will be for the rest of his life. He was born into this family, but you belong in this family, too. And no matter what happens today, tomorrow, next month or next year, nothing will change that. Nothing."
Kirsten continued,
"Ryan, we love you. That cannot change. No matter what happens. No matter what you say, or what you do. You're stuck with us. No matter what."
"But why?" Ryan asked. It was the question he had on his mind for a long time now.
"Why?" Sandy repeated.
"Yeah, why?" Ryan continued, "Up until seven months ago, you had no idea who I even was. Now, you keep saying I'm a part of this family, and I belong here. It's kind of hard to grasp. I mean, I spent sixteen years with my real mother, and she doesn't give a damn about me. She never did. The woman who gave birth to me doesn't love me and doesn't want me around. How do I know you guys won't change your minds and feel the same way?"
"Well, I guess you don't. But we do." Sandy told him, "Ryan, we can't force you to believe us. All we can do is continue to be there for you, and promise you that we will always be there for you."
"Ryan," Kirsten said, "We are going to be here whether you want us or not. That's what parents are for, and Ryan, that's what we are. We just hope you can learn to accept that fact."
Ryan smiled. They didn't really answer his why? question, but if they're really willing to try, he figured he could, too.
"I'll try. I'm trying." He told them, "It's just............weird. I mean, to suddenly have parents. Who care. People to answer to. I don't know. It's just, weird. You know, I'm still going to screw up. I mean, mess up. Sometimes. Not intentionally or anything, but well, you know....."
Sandy really liked to see Ryan smile. He hoped that meant Ryan actually heard what they said.
"Well, of course you'll screw up," Sandy said, trying to make the situation a little lighter, "You're sixteen years old. It's pretty much a pre-requisite that you screw up. And as parents, one of our many obligations is to make your life as miserable as possible for it. We get the privilege of grounding the life out of you. See, that's how it works."
This time, Ryan didn't just smile. He actually laughed, a little.
"Well, after this past month, I'd say you guys were pretty good at fulfilling your parental obligations."
"We're glad you think so." Kirsten told him. She, too, liked to see Ryan smile, and laugh.
"Oh, no, I didn't mean it as a compliment," Ryan joked, "I've spent so much time lately staring at those four walls of the pool house, I swear if three of them weren't made out of windows, it would take more then Dr. Colefield to make me sane."
It was such a relief to see Ryan smiling and joking, even about all the trouble he had been in lately.
"Well, what can we say, "Kirsten laughed, "We take our job very seriously...."
"You don't say!" Ryan teased.
As much as Sandy also enjoyed seeing Ryan feeling better, there was still something else they needed to discuss.
"Listen, speaking of Dr. Colefield..." Sandy started.
"Please tell me this is the part where you say that I don't have to see her any longer, right?" Ryan said, although he doubted it, he could still hope.
"Uh, no." Sandy told him, "This is the part where we tell you that we really like her, and we think you should continue to see her once a week. At least for now."
"We think it's what's best for you." Kirsten added.
"What's best for me," Ryan repeated, "Is that phrase another 'requirement' or something?"
"What do you mean?" Kirsten asked.
Ryan laughed and told them,
"Do you guys have any idea how often you say that?"
"We don't say it that much." Sandy said.
"Yeah, you do. All the time. Just ask Seth." Ryan said, "Who I would guess is still hiding out at the top of the stairs."
"Right Seth!" Ryan called, towards the stairs.
They heard Seth shout back,
"Uh, yeah. All the time."
Ryan was the only one who laughed as he pointed towards the stairs and said,
"See."
Kirsten and Sandy were both shocked.
"How did you know he was there?" Kirsten asked.
"Are you kidding?" Ryan told them, "He always hangs out up there. He says it's the best hiding place to eavesdrop. How do you think he knows so much about what's going on around here?"
Sandy and Kirsten were not amused.
"Then I guess when we're done with you, we'll be having a long talk with Seth," Sandy told him, and then shouted,
"And I'm sure you heard that, Seth."
"Um, what else is there?" Ryan asked. He had hoped to be done. He figured over the past couple of days he had talked more then he had in a really long time. It was something Ryan wasn't completely comfortable doing, not yet, anyway.
"Really, not much," Sandy told him, "We just want to make sure you're ok."
Ryan was relieved. Done talking, for now.
"No, really. I'm fine. And I promise, I'll try. OK?" Ryan told them.
"And you'll continue to see Dr. Colefield?" Kirsten asked.
Ryan at first just made a face. They had already made it clear to him that he didn't have much of a say in the matter.
"That's a rhetorical question, isn't it?" He asked her.
Sandy laughed. Ryan really was catching on, he thought.
"Pretty much," he told Ryan, "What's wrong? Don't you like Dr. Colefield?"
"No, I mean, yes. She's alright." Ryan stammered, "I guess. I don't really know. I have no idea what a therapist is supposed to be like, so I guess she's ok. It's just. Well, no matter what I say, she changes it into a question."
"Yes, Ryan," Sandy started to explain, "That's therapy. The doctor is supposed to ask thought provoking questions, to help you resolve your problems. Didn't Seth explain that to you?"
Ryan was shocked,
"Seth? No, why? How would Seth know?"
Kirsten was surprised that Ryan didn't know, so she told him,
"He went a few years back to a therapist. He had some issues that we felt he needed to address. I'm really surprised he didn't tell you."
"Nope, he never said a word," Ryan told them, "Look, if we're done, I'm kind of tired. I'd like to just go to bed, if that's ok."
Both Kirsten and Sandy nodded their heads,
"Sure," Sandy said, and at the same time Kirsten said, "Yeah, ok." As Ryan got up to leave, Kirsten also told him,
"Good night, sweetie. We love you."
"Yeah, good night," Ryan said, "Um, thanks."
He also added,
"I love you, too." But only after he had walked outside. He had promised Kirsten and Sandy that he would try, and he would. For as long as he was there, he would try.
As Ryan walked to the pool house, he turned to see Seth in the kitchen with Sandy and Kirsten. He was giving Ryan a really nasty look. It was the same look Ryan gave Seth just a few days earlier.
Ryan couldn't help but laugh as he watched Seth sit down, knowing the lecture Seth was about to get. Sorry bro, Ryan thought, but now we're even.
Ryan fell asleep as soon as his head hit his pillow. It was the first time in a long time he didn't have trouble falling asleep, or staying asleep. He probably would have slept through his alarm had Seth not come storming in first thing in the morning.
"I can't believe you," Seth was shouting, "You sold me out. I cannot believe you would rat me out like that! Do you know how long I had to listen to them last night?"
"Huh, what? What time is it?" This really wasn't how Ryan liked waking up in the morning.
"Damn, Seth," Ryan said as he looked over at his clock, "I still have half an hour. What are you bitching about?"
"I just don't know why you would do that to me!" Seth told him.
"Do what? What are you talking about?" Ryan was trying to wake himself up so he could make some sense out of what Seth was babbling about.
"Do what? What do you mean do what!" Seth snorted, "Tell Mom and Dad that I eavesdrop from the top of the stairs, that's what!"
Ryan just looked at Seth for a minute, thinking that maybe he was kidding. When Ryan realized he wasn't, Ryan told him,
"Gee, Seth. I don't know. Um, hum, let me see. Why would I tell on you? I don't know. Why would you tell them about Luke and everyone at the batting cages before I had a chance to explain?"
"Oh, I see." Seth said, waving his finger in front of Ryan, "This is a little revenge thing. A little eye for an eye deal. Sibling rivalry. Is that it?"
Ryan nodded as he got out of his bed,
"Pretty much." He told Seth.
"Fine, then. We're even." Seth said.
"That all depends," Ryan said, "Are you still allowed out this weekend?"
"Yes, but so are you." Seth told him.
"Yeah, but only with you. Doesn't count." Ryan said.
"But I'm not the one who came home drunk." Seth argued.
"But I'm not the one who hides at the top of the stairs like some little kid at Christmas." Ryan shot back.
But Seth corrected him,
"Christmakkuh."
"Whatever." Ryan snorted.
Seth thought about it for a minute. He wasn't exactly sure what he and Ryan were arguing over, and he didn't like it.
"Dude," he told Ryan, "What are we doing? Its not supposed to be you against me. It's supposed to be us against them. We're supposed to stick together!"
"Ah, yes, world domination to follow!" Ryan joked. He didn't really like fighting with Seth, either.
"Ok, we're even. No more ratting each other out. Deal?" Ryan told him.
"Deal." Seth agreed, before moving on to the next subject,
"So, as you know, I heard everything they said last night. You ok?"
Ryan shrugged. "Fine," he told Seth.
"Hey," Ryan continued, "Why didn't you tell me you went to therapy?"
"I don't know," Seth said, to his feet, "Figured you wouldn't be interested."
Ryan could tell Seth was lying.
"Seth. You tell me everything, especially stuff that I don't need to know, or even want to know. I mean, fish sex, anyone? Something like this – the fact you already went to therapy when you knew I didn't want to go, and you didn't think I'd be interested. Come on, man, what gives?"
"They didn't tell you why they sent me." Seth said. Ryan just shook his head, so Seth told him,
"Anti-social behavior."
Ryan laughed, causing Seth to tell him,
"Yeah, well, now you know why I didn't say anything to you."
"But anti-social behavior?" Ryan said, "Seth, you're one of the most social people I know"
Seth interrupted him,
"Who had no friends. They were concerned when I got to high school and refused to go anywhere so...."
"Therapy. Every Newport parent's answer to a problem." Ryan mumbled, confusing Seth,
"Huh?"
"Nothing. Just something Luke said." Ryan said, "So, you're anti-social and I'm violent. Quite a nice little family we have here. Look, I gotta shower and get dressed. I'll catch up with you inside."
"Yeah, we'll go over to school together. Summer will be here a little later to pick us up." Seth said.
Ryan grabbed his clothes before telling Seth,
"I'll probably head over early. I still have some work to catch up on."
"Have you told them yet? About your grades, I mean." Seth asked.
"Yeah, I told your....um....our...." Ryan wasn't sure how to word it. "I told Sandy the other day. He said not to worry about it so much. He knows I'll bring them back up."
"Well, just a word of advise," Seth told him, "When he says he knows you'll bring them back up, he's not trying to be nice. It's a threat. Trust me."
"Yeah, I figured as much," Ryan laughed, "So, I'm still working on them."
As Ryan headed for the bathroom, Seth headed out the door,
"See ya." He told Ryan as he left.
He could do this, Ryan kept telling himself. The more he thought about it, the better he felt about what Kirsten and Sandy had told him. They really seemed genuine about what they said, and he believed them. They were probably the first adults Ryan ever truly believed in. Despite everything he had put them through during the past seven months, they still said they loved him, and wanted to be his family. Even after everything that happened with Oliver, they didn't give up on him. They didn't throw him out and no one beat him. They yelled, they lectured and they grounded. They acted like normal parents, and they were acting like his normal parents. He knew they still didn't trust him, but he had to admit to himself, he hadn't really given them much reason to, not since the day he got there. But as long as Ryan had the Cohens, he no longer had to worry about making it to seventeen. Maybe he could even think more about his future. Kirsten had talked about college, maybe even an Ivy League school she said. And for all of this, Ryan was happy, truly happy. For once it seemed the "Atwood luck" hadn't struck again.
Ryan was still thinking about it all by Friday. He came straight home after detention on both Thursday and Friday, telling Luke that he would try to catch up to him the following week. He actually wanted to talk to Dr. Colefield about Luke and his friends and Kirsten's dislike for them, just to see what she had to say about it before he attempted to hang out with them again.
Ryan came home from detention Friday evening to find Kirsten in the kitchen.
"Hey, you're home," she said, "How was school?"
"Fine. What are you doing here?" Ryan asked.
Kirsten just smiled, and then laughed,
"I live here."
"I mean," Ryan explained, "It's early. You're usually not here this early. Um, what are you doing?" Because to Ryan, it looked like Kirsten was trying to cook.
"Well, I finished up early so I decided to come home and cook dinner." She explained.
"Why?" Ryan asked.
Kirsten looked at Ryan and asked,
"Why what?" She couldn't figure out what Ryan was getting at. He sounded so serious, that it made Kirsten wonder if he was up to something.
But then Ryan laughed and asked her,
"Why would you cook dinner? Don't you like us anymore?"
"Very funny," Kirsten told him, "I can fix fajitas, you know. I've made them before and they're not that bad. You liked them."
"Well," Ryan continued to tease, "actually, Sandy makes them, and he just lets you help."
It really made Kirsten feel good that Ryan was finally able to joke with her, even if it was at the expense of her cooking ability. When she came home early today, she had hoped to get a chance to talk to him alone. She had spent the past seven months letting Sandy do most of the parenting of Ryan, and she knew it was time she became a more active parent, especially since she was the one who didn't want him associating with the new friends he had made. She wanted to talk to him about it, and she wanted to do it alone. Now was her chance.
"Ha, ha, funny man." She said as she threw a green pepper at him, "Here, you slice the peppers."
Ryan put his backpack on one of the bar stools, grabbed a knife and joined Kirsten at the counter. As he started to slice the peppers, he saw Kirsten take the steak and walk over to the stove.
"What are you doing?" he asked.
"Cooking the steak." She told him, wondering why he'd ask such a silly question.
But he told her,
"No, don't. Wait until the peppers and onions are cut, and then cook them all together. That way the peppers and onions are really soft, and the meat isn't over cooked."
Kirsten put the meat down on the counter and said,
"Oh, ok. I'll slice the onions then."
After a minute of the two of them silently slicing, Ryan looked over at Kirsten and asked her,
"What are you doing?"
"Slicing the onions." She told him, again with the silly questions.
And again, Ryan explained,
"You're cutting them too think. You want them thinner."
"Here, like this." He continued as he took the onion from Kirsten and sliced it for her.
Kirsten dropped her knife and said,
"Fine, you slice the onions, too. What can I do?"
Ryan thought about it for a minute, trying to think of a job to give her that Kirsten wouldn't mess up without hurting her feelings.
"Grate the cheese." He finally said.
Kirsten just smiled and held up two packages of pre-grated cheese.
"Oh, ok," Ryan told her, "Pour them into a bowl."
"Gee, thanks," Kirsten laughed, "Do you think I can handle that?"
"We'll see." Ryan teased.
After Kirsten poured the two bags of cheese into the bowl, she asked Ryan,
"Ok, Master Chef, what next?"
Ryan looked around. He had finished slicing the peppers and onions and had mixed them both with the meat and the spices he liked to use. There wasn't much for Kirsten to do. She had already poured the pre-sliced bag of lettuce in another bowl. So he told her,
"Get the sour cream and guacamole."
"Ok," Kirsten said as she lightly slapped Ryan on the arm, "Now you sound like Sandy."
Kirsten looked at the clock. She knew Seth would be home from Summer's and Sandy would be coming in from the office shortly, and she still needed to talk to Ryan alone. And as much as she was enjoying their joking together, she needed to change the subject,
"So, are you going tonight?" she asked.
"Going where?" Ryan said as he continued to work on dinner.
"Going to the movies." Kirsten said, trying to figure out the best way to bring the subject up.
"No." was Ryan's one word answer.
"But you're not going to the batting cages either?" Kirsten asked.
Ryan still wouldn't look up at her, but answered,
"You said no."
"Ryan," Kirsten started to say, but Ryan cut her off,
"Look, Kirsten, I get it. Don't worry about it. Ok. I get it."
"Get wait?" she asked.
Ryan finally looked up at her when he answered,
"Look, I know I haven't given you guys much reason to trust me. I get it."
Kirsten could see the look of hurt in Ryan's eyes and she heard it in his voice. It made her feel so guilty.
"Ryan, no." She tried to explain, "It doesn't have anything to do with trusting you. I promise. It's just. Look, Luke and his friends. They're.... They're trouble."
Here we go again, Ryan thought.
"Kirsten," he said, "You don't know them. I told you already. They had nothing to do with my getting drunk. Brad and Chip weren't even there."
"I don't mean just last weekend." Kirsten said, "I agree. That was totally your fault. I mean the other things they get into."
When Ryan just looked at her and didn't answer, she explained,
"I know about the fights, the partying, the girls. Newport is a small community, Ryan, and we parents are not as stupid as you kids think we are."
When Ryan still didn't answer, she continued,
"Ok. You say I don't like them because I don't know them. Then tell me about them. Tell me what it is you like about them."
Ryan thought about it for a minute as he continued working on dinner. He was trying to figure out how to put it into words to make Kirsten understand without upsetting her.
"You know," he finally said, "They're more like me then you think."
But before he could continue, Kirsten told him.
"They're nothing like you."
Damn, Ryan thought, that wasn't the way to start.
"I don't mean it like that, Kirsten," he tried to explain better, "Not because of the fighting, partying and stuff. I mean, we both know I've been in a lot of fights. You have me going to see a therapist because of it. You can't deny that. And I've already been caught drinking, more then once. I mean in other ways. Look, I like hanging out with Seth. He's a great guy. We have a lot of fun together. But we are completely different, and on the whole, we like different things. I am never going to like boating, and I will never understand his fascination with comic books. I like them, and I read them, but only because of Seth. I never read comic books before coming here. And as for play station, yeah, I like it. We play a lot, and we have fun. But I also like lifting weights, and sports. I miss playing sports. Now that I don't have to worry about where I'm going to sleep at night, or if someone is going to jump me the second I walk in the door, I want to go back to playing. Seth hates sports. Hates anything to do with them, but Luke, Brad and Chip don't. They like soccer and baseball. Ok, they also like water polo, which I have no interest in, at all, but we get along because of soccer and because of baseball. That's why I like hanging out with them."
Kirsten was shocked. For Ryan to say all of that, at one time, he must have really been thinking about it. She knew she couldn't expect him to be just like Seth. Hell, she and Hailey were biological sisters, and they couldn't be more different.
"But what about what happened this summer?" Kirsten asked. Dr. Colefield said it was a good thing if Ryan were able to forgive and forget how they treated him this summer.
"Honestly," Ryan said, "I don't blame Luke for what happened this summer. He and I both acted the same way because of Marissa. He came after me when he thought I was trying to steal Marissa away, and I went after Oliver the same way. I'm not blaming Marissa, entirely. I'm just saying Luke and I are a like in that way. Whether it's good or bad, that's the way it is."
Kirsten still didn't like it, but Ryan did make a great deal of sense. She had to prove that she trusted him, and hope she was right.
"Let me ask you this – what would you guys be doing tonight?" She asked.
Ryan just stared at Kirsten for a minute, not really sure where she was going with that question.
"Chip wants a re-match at the batting cages," he explained, "and then loser pays for something to eat at the diner."
"And the loser would be Chip?" Kirsten asked.
Ryan nodded,
"Probably."
"Because he sucks?" Kirsten joked.
Ryan just laughed,
"Ah, yeah, sorry about that."
"So, there wouldn't be any parties? No fights? No girls?" Kirsten asked.
Ryan couldn't believe where the conversation was going. Kirsten was going to let him go out. He couldn't believe she was going to trust him. It was a shock, but one that made him very happy.
"Well, I'd have to say No. At least to the fights and the partying." He told her.
"And the girls?" Kirsten asked. She liked that Ryan was once again joking with her. He is such a good kid, she thought.
"Do I really have to promise you on that one?" he joked. "I mean, I am single now....."
Kirsten tried to look and sound serious as she told him,
"Well, then, at least promise that you'll be smart, and you know...."
But the look on Ryan's face made her stop talking and start laughing. It was a look of pure panic.
"Ok." Ryan started to stammer, "Just stop talking. Not. No way. Just stop. I'll promise anything if you just stop....."
Kirsten tried to sound parental as she told him,
"I'm just saying...."
"Oh, God," Ryan moaned, "Please. Just. No."
Before Kirsten could continue, Sandy walked into the kitchen.
"Hey," he said, "How's it going? What are you guys talking about?"
"Nothing!" Ryan said. His face was a very bright shade of red.
Kirsten again tried to tell him,
"I was just saying...."
But Ryan interrupted her.
"Batting cages." He said, "That's it. Nothing else. Batting cages, I promise. No parties, no fights, no..... No girls. Ok, batting cages."
"Ok." Kirsten told him.
"Ok?" Ryan asked her, "But I thought you said...."
"I know what I said," Kirsten told him, "But I trust you. Batting cages and then the diner. And then home. I'm still not crazy about the three of them, but I trust you. You can go, and have fun."
Ryan smiled.
"Thanks," he told her, "I promise. No trouble."
And with that, Ryan continued working on the dinner Kirsten came home to cook and Sandy and Kirsten watched him. They both had smiles on their faces, just watching their son cook dinner. Sandy figured they still had at least a week, and he wanted everyone to enjoy this happiness for as long as they could. Ryan was their son, at least for now.
Kirsten finally spoke first,
"You think she'll really be able to help Ryan that much?"
Sandy thought about it for a minute and then told her,
"Yes. I do. Why? Don't you?"
Kirsten shrugged. She liked Dr. Colefield, and she seemed genuine in her concerns and her advise about Ryan, but Kirsten wasn't sure she agreed with everything Dr. Colefield recommended.
So Kirsten told Sandy,
"I think so. I'm just not sure if we should hide the investigation from Ryan. If he finds out about it from somewhere else before we get a chance to tell him, he's going to be devastated."
"Until we know more, I think Dr. Colefield is right." Sandy told her, "There is no way for Ryan to find out about it before we tell him. Remember, it hasn't even begun yet. And as soon as it does, we will talk to Ryan."
Then Sandy continued,
"What about Luke and his friends? Are you going to give in there?"
Another topic Kirsten didn't completely agree with Dr. Colefield about.
"I don't know. I'm not really sure yet. I just don't like those kids, but I do agree I can't expect Ryan to act like Seth. Just because Seth wouldn't choose them as friends, I guess I can't expect Ryan to agree. Ryan is athletic. He plays sports. I guess it stands to reason he'd make friends with other athletes. If you don't mind, I'd like to talk to Ryan alone on that one. See what he says to me before I make up my mind."
Sandy nodded and told her,
"That's fine. I don't think you should talk to him tonight about it, though. Tonight I'd like to talk to him about the other things Dr. Colefield brought up. Continuing with the therapy, wanting to be his parents, the money. Those are all more important issues to address. If we try to hit him with everything, we'll just overwhelm him. Let's start with the big things, and work down from there."
"You're right," Kirsten said, "I just can't believe Ryan would equate love with money. He's got to know that we don't need the money, and that we took him in for other reasons."
Sandy just sighed,
"I guess we never really explained those reasons to him. Not in terms that he understood, apparently. But we will. Tonight."
Kirsten picked up her cell phone,
"Well, I'm going to order from La Rocca's. That should help put him in a better mood since he loves Mexican. Then we can talk to him after dinner."
They spotted Ryan as they pulled in, on the other side of the school parking lot. He was talking to Luke, and the two of them were heading towards Luke's truck.
"I still can't believe you'd blow off just one class," Ryan was telling Luke, "It doesn't seem worth it. Now you have detention for just one class. If you're going to cut, why not bang out the whole day?"
Luke just laughed,
"It was Bio. I hate that class. Besides, it's right before my free period, so to me, it was worth it. Hey, you wanna stop somewhere before we go home? What time do your folks get home from work?"
Despite their previous drunken confessions about therapy, Ryan still wasn't comfortable with the idea of Luke knowing he was now seeing a therapist.
"They're not at work," Ryan told him, "so I don't know what time they'll be getting home. I'm guessing tonight wouldn't be a good idea. Maybe tomorrow, but you know, thanks for the ride."
Luke saw Sandy and Kirsten first as they were pulling into a parking space. He pointed over to them and told Ryan,
"Hey, isn't that them over there?"
Ryan turned to where Luke was pointing,
"Yeah, that's them. Damn, I guess they really don't trust me now. Now they're coming to pick me up just to make sure I come home."
At the same time, he was also thinking, what the hell did Dr. Colefield say to them to make them come here to get me?
Luke just patted Ryan on the back. He really felt for the guy.
"Give it time, man," Luke told him, "They'll get over it. See ya tomorrow."
Luke headed off towards his truck, and Ryan walked over to the car. He got in without saying much. Sandy tried to explain to him that they finished up early and thought he'd like a ride home instead of walking, and Kirsten told him about getting dinner from La Rocca's. Neither of them said anything about Luke, and Ryan didn't say anything at all. He figured whatever they discussed with Dr. Colefield, they'd want to discuss with him. He just wasn't looking forward to that discussion.
Ryan remained quiet throughout most of dinner, but he noticed that Kirsten and Sandy were quiet, too. Only Seth talked. Occasionally everyone laughed, because Seth's latest Summer story was pretty funny, but besides that, no one else seemed to want to add to the conversation. After dinner, Seth made a quick exit, knowing that the next conversation wasn't going to include him. He figured he'd just eavesdrop from the top of the stairs.
After he heard Seth head up the stairs, Ryan turned to Kirsten and Sandy and said,
"I take it I shouldn't try to make the same exit as Seth."
"No, you shouldn't." Sandy told him, "We need to talk."
Ryan let out a big sigh, and looked down at his hands,
"Yeah, well, I figured as much. So, what did she say?"
"First, wait." Sandy said as he stood up and walked out of the kitchen. Ryan wasn't sure but he thought he heard Sandy in the office. When Sandy came back, he dropped what appeared to be a bankbook in front of Ryan. Ryan picked it up and saw that it was for a bank account. It was in his name, and contained a few thousand dollars.
"What's this?" He asked.
"This is a savings account. One of your savings accounts." Sandy started to explain.
But Kirsten interrupted him,
"Ryan, we're sorry. It never dawned on us that you would know about the checks that are sent here each month."
"When they come," Sandy continued to explain, "they are deposited into this account. Your account. I know it's your money, but we thought it was better to put it all in the bank for your future. We'll turn the account over to you when you turn 18. Until then, you're stuck depending on us, the same as Seth. Well, except during the summer, then you're free to get another part time job if you want."
"I don't get it," Ryan said, still staring at the bankbook, "This isn't my money. The state pays you this money for my care. I mean, I know it doesn't cover everything you guys do for me, but it helps cover some of the costs. I can't take it. It's yours."
With that, Ryan pushed the account book towards Sandy. Sandy didn't pick it up, instead he told Ryan,
"Ryan, no one is going to pay us to take care of you. The state sends us this money, but what we do with it is up to us. We decided it should go to you."
"But...." Ryan started.
Kirsten interrupted him,
"No buts, Ryan. No one pays us to take care of Seth, and no one is going to pay us to take care of you."
"But I'm not Seth." Ryan told her.
Kirsten laughed,
"And thank God for small favors. We already have a Seth. We don't need two."
Ryan tried to explain again what he meant,
"No, I mean, Seth is your son. He belongs here."
Before he could continue, Sandy interrupted him,
"Ryan...."
"No, let me finish," Ryan told him, "You can't compare me to Seth. It's not possible. He's your son. He always has been, and he always will be. Nothing can change that. Look, I know what you're saying, and believe me, I've thought about what Dr. Colefield said. And as much as I appreciate everything you do for me, it could all change tomorrow. I know it, and you know it. We all know it."
"Ryan," Sandy said, "You could leave tomorrow, but that wouldn't change the way we feel about you. Yes, Seth is our son, and has been for the past 16 years, and he will be for the rest of his life. He was born into this family, but you belong in this family, too. And no matter what happens today, tomorrow, next month or next year, nothing will change that. Nothing."
Kirsten continued,
"Ryan, we love you. That cannot change. No matter what happens. No matter what you say, or what you do. You're stuck with us. No matter what."
"But why?" Ryan asked. It was the question he had on his mind for a long time now.
"Why?" Sandy repeated.
"Yeah, why?" Ryan continued, "Up until seven months ago, you had no idea who I even was. Now, you keep saying I'm a part of this family, and I belong here. It's kind of hard to grasp. I mean, I spent sixteen years with my real mother, and she doesn't give a damn about me. She never did. The woman who gave birth to me doesn't love me and doesn't want me around. How do I know you guys won't change your minds and feel the same way?"
"Well, I guess you don't. But we do." Sandy told him, "Ryan, we can't force you to believe us. All we can do is continue to be there for you, and promise you that we will always be there for you."
"Ryan," Kirsten said, "We are going to be here whether you want us or not. That's what parents are for, and Ryan, that's what we are. We just hope you can learn to accept that fact."
Ryan smiled. They didn't really answer his why? question, but if they're really willing to try, he figured he could, too.
"I'll try. I'm trying." He told them, "It's just............weird. I mean, to suddenly have parents. Who care. People to answer to. I don't know. It's just, weird. You know, I'm still going to screw up. I mean, mess up. Sometimes. Not intentionally or anything, but well, you know....."
Sandy really liked to see Ryan smile. He hoped that meant Ryan actually heard what they said.
"Well, of course you'll screw up," Sandy said, trying to make the situation a little lighter, "You're sixteen years old. It's pretty much a pre-requisite that you screw up. And as parents, one of our many obligations is to make your life as miserable as possible for it. We get the privilege of grounding the life out of you. See, that's how it works."
This time, Ryan didn't just smile. He actually laughed, a little.
"Well, after this past month, I'd say you guys were pretty good at fulfilling your parental obligations."
"We're glad you think so." Kirsten told him. She, too, liked to see Ryan smile, and laugh.
"Oh, no, I didn't mean it as a compliment," Ryan joked, "I've spent so much time lately staring at those four walls of the pool house, I swear if three of them weren't made out of windows, it would take more then Dr. Colefield to make me sane."
It was such a relief to see Ryan smiling and joking, even about all the trouble he had been in lately.
"Well, what can we say, "Kirsten laughed, "We take our job very seriously...."
"You don't say!" Ryan teased.
As much as Sandy also enjoyed seeing Ryan feeling better, there was still something else they needed to discuss.
"Listen, speaking of Dr. Colefield..." Sandy started.
"Please tell me this is the part where you say that I don't have to see her any longer, right?" Ryan said, although he doubted it, he could still hope.
"Uh, no." Sandy told him, "This is the part where we tell you that we really like her, and we think you should continue to see her once a week. At least for now."
"We think it's what's best for you." Kirsten added.
"What's best for me," Ryan repeated, "Is that phrase another 'requirement' or something?"
"What do you mean?" Kirsten asked.
Ryan laughed and told them,
"Do you guys have any idea how often you say that?"
"We don't say it that much." Sandy said.
"Yeah, you do. All the time. Just ask Seth." Ryan said, "Who I would guess is still hiding out at the top of the stairs."
"Right Seth!" Ryan called, towards the stairs.
They heard Seth shout back,
"Uh, yeah. All the time."
Ryan was the only one who laughed as he pointed towards the stairs and said,
"See."
Kirsten and Sandy were both shocked.
"How did you know he was there?" Kirsten asked.
"Are you kidding?" Ryan told them, "He always hangs out up there. He says it's the best hiding place to eavesdrop. How do you think he knows so much about what's going on around here?"
Sandy and Kirsten were not amused.
"Then I guess when we're done with you, we'll be having a long talk with Seth," Sandy told him, and then shouted,
"And I'm sure you heard that, Seth."
"Um, what else is there?" Ryan asked. He had hoped to be done. He figured over the past couple of days he had talked more then he had in a really long time. It was something Ryan wasn't completely comfortable doing, not yet, anyway.
"Really, not much," Sandy told him, "We just want to make sure you're ok."
Ryan was relieved. Done talking, for now.
"No, really. I'm fine. And I promise, I'll try. OK?" Ryan told them.
"And you'll continue to see Dr. Colefield?" Kirsten asked.
Ryan at first just made a face. They had already made it clear to him that he didn't have much of a say in the matter.
"That's a rhetorical question, isn't it?" He asked her.
Sandy laughed. Ryan really was catching on, he thought.
"Pretty much," he told Ryan, "What's wrong? Don't you like Dr. Colefield?"
"No, I mean, yes. She's alright." Ryan stammered, "I guess. I don't really know. I have no idea what a therapist is supposed to be like, so I guess she's ok. It's just. Well, no matter what I say, she changes it into a question."
"Yes, Ryan," Sandy started to explain, "That's therapy. The doctor is supposed to ask thought provoking questions, to help you resolve your problems. Didn't Seth explain that to you?"
Ryan was shocked,
"Seth? No, why? How would Seth know?"
Kirsten was surprised that Ryan didn't know, so she told him,
"He went a few years back to a therapist. He had some issues that we felt he needed to address. I'm really surprised he didn't tell you."
"Nope, he never said a word," Ryan told them, "Look, if we're done, I'm kind of tired. I'd like to just go to bed, if that's ok."
Both Kirsten and Sandy nodded their heads,
"Sure," Sandy said, and at the same time Kirsten said, "Yeah, ok." As Ryan got up to leave, Kirsten also told him,
"Good night, sweetie. We love you."
"Yeah, good night," Ryan said, "Um, thanks."
He also added,
"I love you, too." But only after he had walked outside. He had promised Kirsten and Sandy that he would try, and he would. For as long as he was there, he would try.
As Ryan walked to the pool house, he turned to see Seth in the kitchen with Sandy and Kirsten. He was giving Ryan a really nasty look. It was the same look Ryan gave Seth just a few days earlier.
Ryan couldn't help but laugh as he watched Seth sit down, knowing the lecture Seth was about to get. Sorry bro, Ryan thought, but now we're even.
Ryan fell asleep as soon as his head hit his pillow. It was the first time in a long time he didn't have trouble falling asleep, or staying asleep. He probably would have slept through his alarm had Seth not come storming in first thing in the morning.
"I can't believe you," Seth was shouting, "You sold me out. I cannot believe you would rat me out like that! Do you know how long I had to listen to them last night?"
"Huh, what? What time is it?" This really wasn't how Ryan liked waking up in the morning.
"Damn, Seth," Ryan said as he looked over at his clock, "I still have half an hour. What are you bitching about?"
"I just don't know why you would do that to me!" Seth told him.
"Do what? What are you talking about?" Ryan was trying to wake himself up so he could make some sense out of what Seth was babbling about.
"Do what? What do you mean do what!" Seth snorted, "Tell Mom and Dad that I eavesdrop from the top of the stairs, that's what!"
Ryan just looked at Seth for a minute, thinking that maybe he was kidding. When Ryan realized he wasn't, Ryan told him,
"Gee, Seth. I don't know. Um, hum, let me see. Why would I tell on you? I don't know. Why would you tell them about Luke and everyone at the batting cages before I had a chance to explain?"
"Oh, I see." Seth said, waving his finger in front of Ryan, "This is a little revenge thing. A little eye for an eye deal. Sibling rivalry. Is that it?"
Ryan nodded as he got out of his bed,
"Pretty much." He told Seth.
"Fine, then. We're even." Seth said.
"That all depends," Ryan said, "Are you still allowed out this weekend?"
"Yes, but so are you." Seth told him.
"Yeah, but only with you. Doesn't count." Ryan said.
"But I'm not the one who came home drunk." Seth argued.
"But I'm not the one who hides at the top of the stairs like some little kid at Christmas." Ryan shot back.
But Seth corrected him,
"Christmakkuh."
"Whatever." Ryan snorted.
Seth thought about it for a minute. He wasn't exactly sure what he and Ryan were arguing over, and he didn't like it.
"Dude," he told Ryan, "What are we doing? Its not supposed to be you against me. It's supposed to be us against them. We're supposed to stick together!"
"Ah, yes, world domination to follow!" Ryan joked. He didn't really like fighting with Seth, either.
"Ok, we're even. No more ratting each other out. Deal?" Ryan told him.
"Deal." Seth agreed, before moving on to the next subject,
"So, as you know, I heard everything they said last night. You ok?"
Ryan shrugged. "Fine," he told Seth.
"Hey," Ryan continued, "Why didn't you tell me you went to therapy?"
"I don't know," Seth said, to his feet, "Figured you wouldn't be interested."
Ryan could tell Seth was lying.
"Seth. You tell me everything, especially stuff that I don't need to know, or even want to know. I mean, fish sex, anyone? Something like this – the fact you already went to therapy when you knew I didn't want to go, and you didn't think I'd be interested. Come on, man, what gives?"
"They didn't tell you why they sent me." Seth said. Ryan just shook his head, so Seth told him,
"Anti-social behavior."
Ryan laughed, causing Seth to tell him,
"Yeah, well, now you know why I didn't say anything to you."
"But anti-social behavior?" Ryan said, "Seth, you're one of the most social people I know"
Seth interrupted him,
"Who had no friends. They were concerned when I got to high school and refused to go anywhere so...."
"Therapy. Every Newport parent's answer to a problem." Ryan mumbled, confusing Seth,
"Huh?"
"Nothing. Just something Luke said." Ryan said, "So, you're anti-social and I'm violent. Quite a nice little family we have here. Look, I gotta shower and get dressed. I'll catch up with you inside."
"Yeah, we'll go over to school together. Summer will be here a little later to pick us up." Seth said.
Ryan grabbed his clothes before telling Seth,
"I'll probably head over early. I still have some work to catch up on."
"Have you told them yet? About your grades, I mean." Seth asked.
"Yeah, I told your....um....our...." Ryan wasn't sure how to word it. "I told Sandy the other day. He said not to worry about it so much. He knows I'll bring them back up."
"Well, just a word of advise," Seth told him, "When he says he knows you'll bring them back up, he's not trying to be nice. It's a threat. Trust me."
"Yeah, I figured as much," Ryan laughed, "So, I'm still working on them."
As Ryan headed for the bathroom, Seth headed out the door,
"See ya." He told Ryan as he left.
He could do this, Ryan kept telling himself. The more he thought about it, the better he felt about what Kirsten and Sandy had told him. They really seemed genuine about what they said, and he believed them. They were probably the first adults Ryan ever truly believed in. Despite everything he had put them through during the past seven months, they still said they loved him, and wanted to be his family. Even after everything that happened with Oliver, they didn't give up on him. They didn't throw him out and no one beat him. They yelled, they lectured and they grounded. They acted like normal parents, and they were acting like his normal parents. He knew they still didn't trust him, but he had to admit to himself, he hadn't really given them much reason to, not since the day he got there. But as long as Ryan had the Cohens, he no longer had to worry about making it to seventeen. Maybe he could even think more about his future. Kirsten had talked about college, maybe even an Ivy League school she said. And for all of this, Ryan was happy, truly happy. For once it seemed the "Atwood luck" hadn't struck again.
Ryan was still thinking about it all by Friday. He came straight home after detention on both Thursday and Friday, telling Luke that he would try to catch up to him the following week. He actually wanted to talk to Dr. Colefield about Luke and his friends and Kirsten's dislike for them, just to see what she had to say about it before he attempted to hang out with them again.
Ryan came home from detention Friday evening to find Kirsten in the kitchen.
"Hey, you're home," she said, "How was school?"
"Fine. What are you doing here?" Ryan asked.
Kirsten just smiled, and then laughed,
"I live here."
"I mean," Ryan explained, "It's early. You're usually not here this early. Um, what are you doing?" Because to Ryan, it looked like Kirsten was trying to cook.
"Well, I finished up early so I decided to come home and cook dinner." She explained.
"Why?" Ryan asked.
Kirsten looked at Ryan and asked,
"Why what?" She couldn't figure out what Ryan was getting at. He sounded so serious, that it made Kirsten wonder if he was up to something.
But then Ryan laughed and asked her,
"Why would you cook dinner? Don't you like us anymore?"
"Very funny," Kirsten told him, "I can fix fajitas, you know. I've made them before and they're not that bad. You liked them."
"Well," Ryan continued to tease, "actually, Sandy makes them, and he just lets you help."
It really made Kirsten feel good that Ryan was finally able to joke with her, even if it was at the expense of her cooking ability. When she came home early today, she had hoped to get a chance to talk to him alone. She had spent the past seven months letting Sandy do most of the parenting of Ryan, and she knew it was time she became a more active parent, especially since she was the one who didn't want him associating with the new friends he had made. She wanted to talk to him about it, and she wanted to do it alone. Now was her chance.
"Ha, ha, funny man." She said as she threw a green pepper at him, "Here, you slice the peppers."
Ryan put his backpack on one of the bar stools, grabbed a knife and joined Kirsten at the counter. As he started to slice the peppers, he saw Kirsten take the steak and walk over to the stove.
"What are you doing?" he asked.
"Cooking the steak." She told him, wondering why he'd ask such a silly question.
But he told her,
"No, don't. Wait until the peppers and onions are cut, and then cook them all together. That way the peppers and onions are really soft, and the meat isn't over cooked."
Kirsten put the meat down on the counter and said,
"Oh, ok. I'll slice the onions then."
After a minute of the two of them silently slicing, Ryan looked over at Kirsten and asked her,
"What are you doing?"
"Slicing the onions." She told him, again with the silly questions.
And again, Ryan explained,
"You're cutting them too think. You want them thinner."
"Here, like this." He continued as he took the onion from Kirsten and sliced it for her.
Kirsten dropped her knife and said,
"Fine, you slice the onions, too. What can I do?"
Ryan thought about it for a minute, trying to think of a job to give her that Kirsten wouldn't mess up without hurting her feelings.
"Grate the cheese." He finally said.
Kirsten just smiled and held up two packages of pre-grated cheese.
"Oh, ok," Ryan told her, "Pour them into a bowl."
"Gee, thanks," Kirsten laughed, "Do you think I can handle that?"
"We'll see." Ryan teased.
After Kirsten poured the two bags of cheese into the bowl, she asked Ryan,
"Ok, Master Chef, what next?"
Ryan looked around. He had finished slicing the peppers and onions and had mixed them both with the meat and the spices he liked to use. There wasn't much for Kirsten to do. She had already poured the pre-sliced bag of lettuce in another bowl. So he told her,
"Get the sour cream and guacamole."
"Ok," Kirsten said as she lightly slapped Ryan on the arm, "Now you sound like Sandy."
Kirsten looked at the clock. She knew Seth would be home from Summer's and Sandy would be coming in from the office shortly, and she still needed to talk to Ryan alone. And as much as she was enjoying their joking together, she needed to change the subject,
"So, are you going tonight?" she asked.
"Going where?" Ryan said as he continued to work on dinner.
"Going to the movies." Kirsten said, trying to figure out the best way to bring the subject up.
"No." was Ryan's one word answer.
"But you're not going to the batting cages either?" Kirsten asked.
Ryan still wouldn't look up at her, but answered,
"You said no."
"Ryan," Kirsten started to say, but Ryan cut her off,
"Look, Kirsten, I get it. Don't worry about it. Ok. I get it."
"Get wait?" she asked.
Ryan finally looked up at her when he answered,
"Look, I know I haven't given you guys much reason to trust me. I get it."
Kirsten could see the look of hurt in Ryan's eyes and she heard it in his voice. It made her feel so guilty.
"Ryan, no." She tried to explain, "It doesn't have anything to do with trusting you. I promise. It's just. Look, Luke and his friends. They're.... They're trouble."
Here we go again, Ryan thought.
"Kirsten," he said, "You don't know them. I told you already. They had nothing to do with my getting drunk. Brad and Chip weren't even there."
"I don't mean just last weekend." Kirsten said, "I agree. That was totally your fault. I mean the other things they get into."
When Ryan just looked at her and didn't answer, she explained,
"I know about the fights, the partying, the girls. Newport is a small community, Ryan, and we parents are not as stupid as you kids think we are."
When Ryan still didn't answer, she continued,
"Ok. You say I don't like them because I don't know them. Then tell me about them. Tell me what it is you like about them."
Ryan thought about it for a minute as he continued working on dinner. He was trying to figure out how to put it into words to make Kirsten understand without upsetting her.
"You know," he finally said, "They're more like me then you think."
But before he could continue, Kirsten told him.
"They're nothing like you."
Damn, Ryan thought, that wasn't the way to start.
"I don't mean it like that, Kirsten," he tried to explain better, "Not because of the fighting, partying and stuff. I mean, we both know I've been in a lot of fights. You have me going to see a therapist because of it. You can't deny that. And I've already been caught drinking, more then once. I mean in other ways. Look, I like hanging out with Seth. He's a great guy. We have a lot of fun together. But we are completely different, and on the whole, we like different things. I am never going to like boating, and I will never understand his fascination with comic books. I like them, and I read them, but only because of Seth. I never read comic books before coming here. And as for play station, yeah, I like it. We play a lot, and we have fun. But I also like lifting weights, and sports. I miss playing sports. Now that I don't have to worry about where I'm going to sleep at night, or if someone is going to jump me the second I walk in the door, I want to go back to playing. Seth hates sports. Hates anything to do with them, but Luke, Brad and Chip don't. They like soccer and baseball. Ok, they also like water polo, which I have no interest in, at all, but we get along because of soccer and because of baseball. That's why I like hanging out with them."
Kirsten was shocked. For Ryan to say all of that, at one time, he must have really been thinking about it. She knew she couldn't expect him to be just like Seth. Hell, she and Hailey were biological sisters, and they couldn't be more different.
"But what about what happened this summer?" Kirsten asked. Dr. Colefield said it was a good thing if Ryan were able to forgive and forget how they treated him this summer.
"Honestly," Ryan said, "I don't blame Luke for what happened this summer. He and I both acted the same way because of Marissa. He came after me when he thought I was trying to steal Marissa away, and I went after Oliver the same way. I'm not blaming Marissa, entirely. I'm just saying Luke and I are a like in that way. Whether it's good or bad, that's the way it is."
Kirsten still didn't like it, but Ryan did make a great deal of sense. She had to prove that she trusted him, and hope she was right.
"Let me ask you this – what would you guys be doing tonight?" She asked.
Ryan just stared at Kirsten for a minute, not really sure where she was going with that question.
"Chip wants a re-match at the batting cages," he explained, "and then loser pays for something to eat at the diner."
"And the loser would be Chip?" Kirsten asked.
Ryan nodded,
"Probably."
"Because he sucks?" Kirsten joked.
Ryan just laughed,
"Ah, yeah, sorry about that."
"So, there wouldn't be any parties? No fights? No girls?" Kirsten asked.
Ryan couldn't believe where the conversation was going. Kirsten was going to let him go out. He couldn't believe she was going to trust him. It was a shock, but one that made him very happy.
"Well, I'd have to say No. At least to the fights and the partying." He told her.
"And the girls?" Kirsten asked. She liked that Ryan was once again joking with her. He is such a good kid, she thought.
"Do I really have to promise you on that one?" he joked. "I mean, I am single now....."
Kirsten tried to look and sound serious as she told him,
"Well, then, at least promise that you'll be smart, and you know...."
But the look on Ryan's face made her stop talking and start laughing. It was a look of pure panic.
"Ok." Ryan started to stammer, "Just stop talking. Not. No way. Just stop. I'll promise anything if you just stop....."
Kirsten tried to sound parental as she told him,
"I'm just saying...."
"Oh, God," Ryan moaned, "Please. Just. No."
Before Kirsten could continue, Sandy walked into the kitchen.
"Hey," he said, "How's it going? What are you guys talking about?"
"Nothing!" Ryan said. His face was a very bright shade of red.
Kirsten again tried to tell him,
"I was just saying...."
But Ryan interrupted her.
"Batting cages." He said, "That's it. Nothing else. Batting cages, I promise. No parties, no fights, no..... No girls. Ok, batting cages."
"Ok." Kirsten told him.
"Ok?" Ryan asked her, "But I thought you said...."
"I know what I said," Kirsten told him, "But I trust you. Batting cages and then the diner. And then home. I'm still not crazy about the three of them, but I trust you. You can go, and have fun."
Ryan smiled.
"Thanks," he told her, "I promise. No trouble."
And with that, Ryan continued working on the dinner Kirsten came home to cook and Sandy and Kirsten watched him. They both had smiles on their faces, just watching their son cook dinner. Sandy figured they still had at least a week, and he wanted everyone to enjoy this happiness for as long as they could. Ryan was their son, at least for now.