Instert standard disclaimer here. Everyone should know that I don't own these characters. Also chopped the story up into chapters. Sorry if the transitions are rough. If you want to read it without chapters, head over to vejiitasei.com.

Absolution- Part 1, Chapter 7
by the Prime Minister

Lina woke up slowly, the sensation more like she was surfacing than waking, and spent a long time simply staring at the ceiling and feeling the hollowness within her. Her eyes felt dry and cracked from her many hours of weeping and her body was heavy like lead. It was as if the mattress beneath her was sucking her against it, and she had no inclination to struggle. The sound of the ocean and the warbling of birds floated in through an open window, and somewhere within the house came a baby's laugh. She sighed and rolled over, watching the ocean through the glass doors at the side of the room. The sky and water were beautiful shades of blue, the ocean tending towards green as it came closer to shore, just the color of Gourry's eyes. Gourry. Her exhaustion was so great that the tears would not come at the thought of him, leaving her with a dull, deep ache in the pit of her. He had done what he thought was right, leaving her to raise her child with the man she had conceived the child with, a man who was no longer human. A hand snaked up around her neck to grasp at the ring she always wore there, but her fingers closed around emptiness and she remembered that she had thrown the gift away. Gourry had always asked about the ring but she had never revealed anything about it, simply saying it was worth too much to just leave lying around. Now that the ring was gone, she found that it was important to her, that the things it represented were important to her.

Another baby's giggle resounded throughout the house, followed by the deep, silky tones of Xellos' voice. He was trying to be sweet, but he was no Gourry. Every time she had looked into Gourry's eyes she had known that he loved her to the very core. She couldn't bear to look into Xellos' eyes, not only because they weren't Gourry's, or because they held no love for her, but also because they weren't the same as they were when he had meant something to her.

Her thoughts had returned to her days with the blonde swordsman by the time Xellos bumped open the door with a hip, the baby strapped to his chest in a sitting position and a tray in his hands. Good morning, Miss Lina, he said gently, walking over to the bed. She did her best to ignore him, but it was somehow nice to not be alone, even if her companion wasn't human. Giving up, she rolled towards him, and her eyes met the baby's. The child's eyes were exactly the same as human Xellos' had been, and something inside her twisted.

the baby said, reaching out a chubby hand.

Xellos smiled and set the tray down on the bedside table. That's right, Lecia, say good morning to Mama, he murmured, and the baby gurgled happily and reached out to her. He glanced at Lina and his expression softened even further. Would you like to hold her?

Lina replied, watching as Xellos' expression stayed the same. Well, to someone who didn't know him as well as she did, it would have appeared to stay the same, but she could tell that it tightened and was costing him some effort to keep it on his face.

He seemed to accept her words, and he nodded his head slowly. Very well, he murmured. How are you doing today?

Lecia squealed, kicking her legs as Xellos leaned forward.

Oh my, Xellos sighed, sitting up again and glancing about. He moved a few vases to higher positions, and made sure that nothing could be tuggable, then unwrapped the child from his chest and set her on the floor. She immediately began to push around the room, doing a strange crawl with her rear shoved high in the air. Xellos shut the door and smiled at Lina's questioning stare. She doesn't like to crawl, he explained with a lopsided grin, putting his hand behind his head.

Lina nodded and sighed, watching him as he returned to her side and sat on the edge of the bed. Are you all right? he asked gently, reaching out a hand, which she noticed had no glove upon it, and brushing some of the hair out of her eyes.

Lina grumbled, starting to shake. It hurts like hell when someone leaves you.

Something in his face twisted in a very un-Monsterly fashion and he kicked off his slippers, lying down next to her. I'm here, whether you need to talk about it or scream that it's all my fault, he murmured.

For some reason his words struck a nerve and she felt the tears well up in her anew. Reaching out, she curled her fists in his shirt and pulled him to her, burying her face in the fabric. She felt his arms wrap around her tentatively, then his long fingers were stroking her hair gently. Ignoring the fact that no heartbeat echoed within his chest, she pressed herself to him. Even if he was a Monster now, even if he wasn't capable of many of the things he had been as a human, he had still become her friend during their time in the cabin, and she supposed that his race didn't change that. He was still her friend, most likely, and when she thought of it that way, she found it wasn't so awkward and didn't hurt quite as much.

Lina flung her arms around him and let him hold her as she wept, feeling all the pain of loss and fear of loneliness bubble to the surface. She finally realized that Gourry truly was gone, that their time together was over, and it would be a long, long time before she would see him again. It dawned on her that she would get over it, that with time the pain would fade, but at the moment it felt nearly unbearable.

Xellos, mercifully, did not say a word, just rested his chin on the top of her head and let his warm arms encircle her body. He moved his hand down to her back and gently rubbed it, and the contact was soothing. She realized that she had felt pretty alone and isolated for a while, and it was nice to have someone hold her and be with her. Not that she needed it, she told herself, but it was still nice.

He held her until her crying stopped, his embrace tightening as her body continued to tremble. I'm so sorry, Lina, he whispered into her hair. I never wanted you to feel pain. I would protect you from it, if I could.

No one can, she murmured. It's part of being human.

She could have sworn she felt him tense a little at her words, but it was so slight that she couldn't be sure. His lips pressed against the top of her head and he gently released her. He sat up and tucked the covers more tightly around her, then reached over and gathered up pillows, placing them behind her so that she was propped up. he said. I didn't know how hungry you were, but I thought you should eat something. Placing the tray in her lap, he produced a flower out of nowhere and placed it in the small glass vase on the tray. It was a white rose, the smaller, wild variety that had grown in her parents' garden when she was a child. The scent was more spicy than the normal sort of rose, and she wondered how he had known it was her favorite. She looked up at him, the question on her lips, but he put his index finger to his mouth and whispered, It's a secret.

She shook her head, amused but unable to express it through her sadness, and took up a fork, staring at the breakfast in front of her. Her appetite hadn't really returned, but he was right, she should eat something. The food actually looked quite good, and she recalled that Xellos was an excellent cook. She raised the fork but paused before she gathered her first bite. Would you like us to leave you in peace? Xellos asked gently, leaning forward.

Lina considered, then shook her head. No, not just yet, she murmured, taking a bite of her breakfast.

Xellos nodded and smiled, turning his head and watching Lecia scoot around the room. She's amazing, he breathed. It seems like she learns something new every single day. I can't imagine what that must be like.

Probably overwhelming, Lina muttered around her breakfast.

You went through it, didn't you?

Yeah, but I was way too little to remember it. We humans don't remember everything that happens to us the way that you do.

Xellos sighed and nodded. I suppose that's true. Still, I remember certain things much more clearly than others.

She took another bite and glanced at him sideways, expecting him to elaborate. He fell silent, however, and she was unable to read his expression. Xellos was an enigma, and she was glad for it. His mysteries gave her mind something with which to occupy its time. She jumped as there was a thump and the child started to scream, and Lina could have sworn that she'd never seen Xellos move so quickly.

Oh dear, he cooed to the baby as he picked her up. Did you bump your head?

The child's little red face contorted and she began to cry, Xellos kissing her head and bouncing her gently as he murmured things to her. Is she okay? Lina asked, wincing at the high-pitched sound of the baby's wails.

She's fine, Xellos said. She's getting more bumps now that she insist on moving around on her own. He nuzzled the baby's head with his nose and kissed her. Poor thing, I'm sorry it hurts, he murmured.

What's her name? Lina asked, feeling a little guilty as she did so. The kid was hers, after all, and almost 10 months old, if she calculated correctly, and yet she didn't even know her name.

Xellos replied, then paused. Lecia Inverse.

Something caught in Lina's throat. It was as if she finally realized that, whether she liked it or not, the little girl was a part of her, a part of her family. Nothing she did would erase that fact, or that Lecia was proof that she had once shared something with Xellos, something intense enough that she had been willing to give him her body and become one with him. Funny, she could recall feeling that way about Xellos, but she had never before realized that the baby represented that. She had always considered the child an unhappy accident. The baby still made her uncomfortable, but perhaps that would change, over time.

Xellos sighed and re-strapped Lecia to his chest and returned to Lina's side. I'm sorry for the disturbance, he mumbled. He gestured at her near-empty plate. May I remove your tray?

Uh, sure, she said, watching him take it from her.

I'll see to it that there is a bath waiting for you shortly, he said moving towards the door. There are plenty of books around if you need distraction, and I'll bring your noon meal to you. I was hoping, however, that you'd take supper with us.

Yeah, whatever, Lina replied, feeling a bit overwhelmed.

Xellos smiled and executed a little bow, then left the room. Lecia's whimperings faded as they moved away, and Lina slid out of bed and closed the door to her room. Walking over to the wardrobe, she threw it open and drew a breath as she saw the beautiful things stored inside. They weren't the sort of clothes she typically wore, but the craftsmanship was amazing and the fabrics were soft beyond belief. The garments were almost all long dresses, of many different cuts and fine cloth, and she ran her fingers over all of them, finally choosing a white gown of cotton gauze with another cotton shift beneath it. The fabric was filmy, light, and utterly soft, just as she would expect a cloud to feel. She reached up and pulled it from the hanger, laying it out on the bed and realizing the bodice of the dress was embroidered with white silk thread in an intricate pattern of leaves. Her finger played over the soft cloth once more, then she looked around for a robe. She found one folded in a drawer, and as she pulled it out she realized that it was the same robe Xellos had given her when they were living in the cabin. She pressed it to her face and inhaled. Why, it even still smelled like their cabin, like wood smoke, bound leather books, and cooking spices. A small smile passed across her features, the first real smile she had experienced in a long time. Sliding it on, she went in search of a bath.