Instert standard disclaimer here. Everyone should know that I don't own these characters. Except, of course, the original ones. Also chopped the story up into chapters. Sorry if the transitions are rough. If you want to read it without chapters, head over to vejiitasei.com.

Absolution- Part 1, Chapter 10
by the Prime Minister

Lina walked out onto the beach and collapsed, feeling overheated inside the house on such a hot night. She felt almost as exhausted as Lecia must have felt, she realized. Yawning, she stretched out on the sand and stared up at the stars, thinking how beautiful they were. Somewhere under those same stars was Gourry. She hoped that he knew that she didn't hate him for what he'd done. He would always have a part of her heart, and she could only pray that he felt that. As if conjured by her thoughts of him, she heard the melody he had always used to hum drifting across the beach to her. She closed her eyes and listened to the song, the elven words sounding strange but smooth to her ear. The music came nearer and soon was upon her, the sand shifting as someone sat down beside her, the song even sweeter up close. Strange, but Xellos had never sang for her before. She hadn't even known that Monsters could sing. It didn't seem as if such a sweet, pure sound should be produced by one so dark and evil.

Lina mumbled, keeping her eyes shut.

I'm sorry, am I bothering you? Xellos asked, and she could suddenly feel his nearness.

So he was evil incarnate. He was still the most polite person she knew. Xellos had gone out of his way to be courteous and respectful to her, although it did seem as if he had been distant. Then again, he had been somewhat distant the first time he was a Monster as well. It occurred to her that perhaps the current Xellos was a completely different animal than he had been before.

No, don't stop, she murmured, feeling the sweet heaviness of sleep steal into her limbs. What does it mean? What are you singing?

Xellos cleared his throat and let the words loose again, but this time sang them in her language. What will I do when your voice no longer drifts through my days and I see you only in dreams? How will I feel when your eyes dance only in memory and you are so, so far away? You have made time so very precious, gently awakening and letting me revel in your beauty. The tender touch of your powerful heart, the dearness of your strength, so soon to be lost to me, maybe forever. What will I do? Remember you, and hold to my heart all that you have taught me.

His voice faded off into the night, and she lay there, silent, for some time. Slowly she opened her eyes, studying his darkened profile against the light of the stars. Yes, he was different than before, and she wondered if all the human hadn't been removed from him. For a Monster he was being awfully sensitive and kind, not once trying to cause trouble. Oh, what she wouldn't have given to have her ring back just then, to activate its magic and finally be able to understand what was going on inside of him. Her question died on her tongue, as she did not want to interrupt the atmosphere his song had created. She suspected he would never sing for her again. Still, the question nagged at her, and even though she suspected she wouldn't get a straight answer from the trickster priest, she had to try. Her probing might even drive him further into himself, but it was a chance she was willing to take. Sitting up, she moved her hand toward his arm, wanting to touch him and break the melancholy spell he had cast over them, but he did not react and she pulled her hand away awkwardly. She sighed and looked down into her lap for a moment, formulating her words, then took a deep breath and spoke. Are you completely Monster once again?

His head moved as if he looked down upon her, but the deep shadows of his bangs prevented her from seeing his face. A soft noise escaped him, as if he was on the verge of launching into a lengthy story, but instead he merely sighed. Yes, I'm supposed to be, was all he replied.

Lina swallowed, unused to conversing frankly with someone. He had said supposed' did that mean that he actually wasn't one hundred percent Monster? She studied his sharp profile as he leaned back on his elbows in the sand, the night breeze stirring his heavy, glossy locks, his lips parted ever so slightly. This Xellos was definitely different than both the ones she had known before. But you aren't, she whispered, almost nervous to hear his reply.

Again he sighed. No, Miss Lina, I am not. When my mistress changed me back into a Monster, my human soul was grafted to my Monster soul. Now I am trapped between the two races, enjoying the benefits of neither.

Lina felt an odd weight settle in her chest. So she was correct; there was some human left in him still. Still a bit anxious, she clenched her hands in her lap to keep from reaching for him and took another breath. What's different? she asked. Which are you more of?

He shook his head. You ask difficult questions, Lina Inverse, he said softly, eyes hidden in the shadows of his bangs. It almost hurt to see the once-jovial Xellos changed so, but she supposed a year as a mortal was worth a thousand as a demon. Still, even as a human he had possessed more humor, and it bothered her to see him as he was at the moment.

I just want to know what I'm tangling with, she replied as gently as she could.

I am mostly Monster, with the human fluttering just beyond my reach. I know it's there, and I can almost touch it, but as soon as I try to pin it down it vanishes from my grasp like mist. So much is there, and yet I can't get to it, can't return to either life I once possessed.

Lina saw his jaw clench and the tendons in the backs of his hands stood out as he curled his fists in the sand. Frustration fairly radiated from him, and she didn't need her ring to sense it. Certainly he was different, but it wasn't bad. Even if he was a Monster, he had been exceedingly gentle with her. Besides, the fondness he held for Lecia was undeniable, and watching his long, powerful hands move lightly over the baby's skin as he bathed her had touched her somehow. Xellos wasn't like other men, Monster or otherwise, and he never had been. I'm sorry, she finally said, lowering her eyes.

No need, he replied gently, turning to face her.

I'm sorry for everything, she pressed, meaning the words with her whole heart. He had done too much for her to ignore it, and she didn't want him to be upset.

She finally caught sight of his eyes, the amethyst depths glittering in the starlight, and she found herself wishing that he would open his eyes more often. Even if his slitted pupils still bothered her a little, he had beautiful eyes, and she wanted them to give up their secrets. Once again she realized she really didn't know him at all. Xellos, the everlasting mystery. Miss Lina, please don't worry about it. Everything will be fine.

But what about for you? she blurted, leaning towards him and looking straight into his gaze. Drop the act and let me in, dammit! You don't need your masks here!

Xellos snorted sharply, but she couldn't tell if it was out of bitterness, amusement, or surprise. You broke my mask years ago, he muttered. Please, you don't need to fret.

What can you still feel? she whispered, afraid of the answer but unwilling to drop the subject. A tight look crossed his face, and she knew she had nearly pushed him too far.

Everything I could feel as a Monster. I feel glee, discomfort, fondness, annoyance, frustration...I feel all the emotions that do not require passion. The rest are lost to me, although I'm aware of them, flitting at the edges of my perception. . .

she murmured, unsure what to say next and not even certain that she wanted to comfort him.

Suddenly his eyes closed and his face snapped back into his customary bland smile. Shall we go inside? he asked, voice brighter than in the preceding moment.

Look at me, she growled. Don't do this. You can't. It's not good for anyone, not even you.

His features slowly relaxed and she saw his eyes open a sliver. Let's go inside, he said, all pretense vanishing from his tone.

she said with a yawn, and before she knew what was happening she found herself cradled in his arms. It crossed her mind to protest, but then she remembered how exhausted she was. Just this once, she murmured, letting her head rest against his shoulder.

Very well, he said, and smiled down at her.

As they walked toward the house, something occurred to her. Hey, Xellos? What are your plans for the future?

His smile stayed on his face and he inclined his head, closing his eyes. That is a secret, he replied, and a moment later she was fast asleep.