One of the hardest chapters I've had to write so far! I'm still not entirely happy with it, because it seems so broken up. As the title suggests, it's made up of bits and piece of emotions, furtive glimpses into the psyche of some of the characters. It was emotionally draining to write!

Dedications. Ernie, would you like to take over?

Ernie: This. Chapter. Is. Dedicated. To. Meow14. And. Our. Wonderful. Beta. Nightcrawler.

I am ashamed to say that my last chapter only got one review. One bloody review! What is wrong with you people?? Do you love me? Don't you? Make up your mind! Meow14 was my only reviewer! (A million thank yous. You were my only comfort.) What does a girl have to do to get some attention around here?

As for Nightcrawler, the Cole section of this chapter was entirely his idea, and he actually wrote its first three paragraphs. Here's an official thank you, my friend!

As for the rest of you… the little purple button at the end of the page is not only for decorative purposes. USE IT!

Chapter 34: Flood of emotions

Perdicus paced the stone room he was in. His son's room may have been large, yet at a first glance, Perdicus looked very much like some sort of caged beast.

Twenty-six steps...twenty-seven steps...twenty-eight steps and turn, he mentally counted. One step...two steps...

He abruptly stopped. Valdis had shimmered in.

"Father?" asked Valdis in surprise. "What are you doing here?"

"What, can't I pay my own son a visit?

Valdis's expression remained stony. He was in no mood for games. Perdicus saw that and cut to the chase.

"We need to move ahead with the plan."

It was a credit to Valdis that his face betrayed nothing of his inner turmoil.

Tonight he saw that Talia indeed felt something for him. It was the same fiery passion he felt for her, he realised. He had known she was attracted to him, but what they had just shared was like nothing he had ever imagined. Now he knew that they belonged together.

Still, the scheme he, himself, had devised would wound the young woman to the core. Valdis had discovered something new about himself that night. When he had watched her writhing in the throes of her nightmare, he felt his own heart breaking. He had woken her up and held her like the treasure she was to him. Her every quiver echoed in his mind and soul, and he would have done anything to erase the pain and fear from her eyes.

She had suddenly turned cold on him next, and soon left him. Valdis had yet to understand why, yet part of him suspected that it was because of her having switched sides. Perhaps she felt that by succumbing to him, she had succumbed to her own evil nature. But Valdis knew that that evil was part of her, and she would never be complete unless she embraced it. He had meant what he had said. She didn't belong in the witches' world. She belonged with him. Yes, his great plan would hurt her deeply, but it would be for her own good. So they could be together.

"I'll make the arrangements," he finally said.

There was no other way. He would turn his heart to stone and cause her pain, and once it was all over, he would, patiently and lovingly put all the pieces of her broken heart back together again.

"Excellent, my boy...!" Perdicus said with a beaming smile. "I'll let you get some sleep then," he said leaving his son's room.

But Valdis had lost the will to sleep. Tentatively, he walked to the large window and opened it despite, or perhaps because of, the cold outside. He stared outside into the darkness. The ancient castle that was his family home stood proudly on the edge of a dramatic and highly dangerous cliff. The drop plunged into the deep recesses of the sea and the waves roared angrily, throwing themselves in a splutter of angry foam on its jagged rocks.

Yet Valdis saw none of these things. In his mind's eye he saw only chocolate brown eyes covered by silky eyelids and long dark eyelashes; he saw cinnamon-coloured tresses tumbling down on a silky smooth back, caressing golden shoulders. He took a deep breath inhaling the scent of the woman he loved that had not only penetrated his heart, but also his clothes.

"Talia..." he whispered to the wind.

***************************

"Talia, wake up!" called Wyatt for what seemed like the umpteenth time.

"Go away Wyatt," she mumbled finally awake enough to be half-way coherent. "I put a note on your door cancelling today's training. Haven't you seen it?"

"Yeah, I found it. Wake up. It's seven o'clock already."

Talia turned on her other side.

She had been very troubled, to say the least, when she had come back from the cabin last night. And so, she did the only thing that could calm her down in those situations. She trained in the basement. She'd lost all sense of time as she jumped, punched and kicked at her imaginary attackers. She had trained with a sword, a knife and even with her own powers, though of course hellfire was out of the question. When she had finally stopped, she was drenched in sweat and her muscles were crying out in protest at the intense workout. It had been five o'clock in the morning. Talia had scribbled a quick message to Wyatt and headed for bed.

"It's a Saturday," she whined underneath her covers. "Let me sleep."

"But...you don't understand. We're putting up the Christmas decorations today," Wyatt said, unable to conceal his excitement.

She pulled the blanket he was sitting on and Wyatt landed ungracefully on the floor in a jumble of assorted limbs.

A sleepy-eyed face peaked under the thick covers. Talia saw the spectacle before her and sniggered.

"It's not funny," growled Wyatt as he worked to straighten himself out.

She was still sniggering when Wyatt finally stood up.

Unfortunately for him, though, it didn't last. He stepped on a bottle of Talia's nail polish that had rolled on the floor. Wyatt's foot slipped and he once again, for the second time that morning, landed on his rear.

Talia howled with laughter.

"That hurt!" moaned Wyatt, rubbing the painful part of his anatomy.

Talia rolled around the bed in fits of laughter in response.

"Will you get up!" cried an annoyed Wyatt. "Mom made pancakes!" he couldn't help but smile at that.

Talia's laughter stopped instantly and was replaced by a hungry look.

"Maple syrup?" she asked.

Wyatt nodded.

Talia literally jumped out of bed. She gathered her sleep tussled hair in a ponytail, not bothering to brush it beforehand, and followed her cousin down the stairs.

Talia noted the wonderful smells that filled the house.

"What's the occasion?" she asked when she walked into the kitchen to find everyone there before her.

"Christmas," offered Piper as she placed in the middle of the table a platter full, to the delight of everyone, with fresh pancakes.

"But there's still sixteen days 'til Christmas," observed Talia.

"We've always celebrated Christmas in this house, Talia," explained Phoebe as she handed her daughter the platter with the pancakes. "Grams's birthday was on the ninth of December and we would always decorate then. It's a Halliwell tradition."

"Simply a Halliwell tradition, or can anyone join in?" joked a male voice behind Piper.

"Dad, you made it!" Wyatt enthused.

Piper turned to find herself enveloped in Leo's strong arms.

"I haven't missed a Halliwell Christmas Decoration since before you were born, Wyatt, I'm not about to start now," he said, his eyes never leaving Piper's.

"I'm glad you came," she said softly, wrapping her arms around his neck.

"Yuck! Get a room you two!" called Paige, to the general amusement of the people sitting at the table.

Wyatt watched with a raised eyebrow as Talia smothered her pancakes with maple syrup. She was already on her second pancake.

"Don't you have to watch your figure or something?" he asked.

"Shut up, Wyatt."

Talia didn't explain that she had worked up an appetite not only because of her nightly workout at the basement, but also because of the different workout she had had before, at the cabin. Some things were better left unsaid. She chewed her way through her third pancake.

"Christmas carols!" called Phoebe hitting her forehead with the palm of her hand. "That's what's missing. We can't have the annual Halliwell Christmas Decoration Breakfast without Christmas carols." Quickly she jumped off her seat and rushed out of the kitchen only to return a few seconds later with her CD player. She plugged it into one of the kitchen sockets and soon, it was blaring "Rudolph the Red nosed Reindeer".

Talia was engulfed by the Christmas spirit that flooded the kitchen. A sense of family surrounded her. It was a new experience for her and she was at loss of what to think about it. Did she really belong here? The Halliwells certainly acted like it, and she was truly grateful for that, but she wasn't so sure. Last night was a reminder of the lure the dark side still held for her. There was still, and there would always be, a bad girl hidden inside her. The understatement brought a wry smile to Talia's lips. Okay, perhaps more than a bad girl. She was after all Princess of All Evil, and that was an inescapable fact. It was simply who she was.

"Earth to Talia..." said Wyatt waving a hand in front of Talia's face.

"I'm sorry Wyatt, what did you say?"

"Are you okay, Tal?" he said looking at her concernedly.

"Yeah, sure, I was just thinking. What did you say?"

"I said that I invited Judy to come over today so she could help decorate. You can invite Josh if you want."

Talia's eyes widened at the mention of Josh's name. Oh, no! How could she possibly have forgotten him? Last time she had seen him, she had literally dropped him at the sight of Valdis. What would Josh think about her? She had to explain.

"I'll call him later to see if he can come over."

'Explain what?' the little voice in her head mocked. She had run off with another man and she had, worse, slept with him. What was there to explain?

Still Josh was sure to want an explanation for her abrupt departure from school yesterday. She had been lucky so far. Wyatt had gone over to Mark's house on Friday afternoon, so that she didn't have to explain where she had been. The other Halliwells hadn't asked her yet where she had been last night.

"So, Talia, where were you all afternoon yesterday?" asked Paige as if on queue.

"Yeah, I was looking for you to see of you wanted to do something together, but I couldn't find you so I assumed you were with Josh," added Phoebe.

"No. I wasn't with Josh yesterday," she said quickly.

"Oh?" said Phoebe waiting for an answer.

"I went to the library."

"Oh."

That answer seemed to satisfy everyone. Talia's passion for books was well known and she was a frequent sight at the book-filled corridors of the public library.

"You must've come in late," commented Paige. "I didn't hear you come in."

"I got a bit carried away." Only the greatest understatement of the year, thought Talia! "Then I flamed back here, changed into running gear and went for a bit of a run."

"Honestly Talia," commented Piper, "I don't know how you do it. Your "bit of a runs" go on for miles."

Talia shrugged.

"I've gotten used to them," she said putting the last piece of pancake in her mouth.

"No wonder you can eat so mush and stay so thin," said Paige looking enviously at Talia chewing.

****************************

"Hello?"

"Hi Josh. It's me, Talia."

"Talia...! What's up? Why did you leave so suddenly yesterday, and who was that guy on the motorbike?"

Talia sighed. Josh's reaction was exactly what she had expected. Confused above all else.

"It's a bit of a long story Josh. Look, can you come over today? It's the Haliwells' traditional Christmas Decoration day. Don't ask. We can talk then."

There was a pause at the other end of the line.

"Yeah, sure...what time?"

"Whenever you want really...from the looks of them, we'll be here all day. Aunt Piper says you're invited to lunch too."

"I'll be there in an hour."

****************************

"It's Josh, I'll get it!" called Talia above the Christmas music.

She swung the door open to reveal Josh smiling nervously at her.

"Hi."

"Hi."

"You...err...dropped these yesterday."

He held her books in his hands; the books she had dropped the day before, in her hurry to catch up to Valdis.

Talia never blushed. But if she did, she would've.

"Thanks," she said taking her books from him. "Come in."

Josh held her hand as she turned to enter the house. She turned back to face him, an inquisitive look in her eyes.

"We need to talk, and I'd rather we did it out here."

She nodded and followed him to sit on the manor's front steps.

"Talia, I have to know. Is there someone else?"

Talia stared at the ground.

"Not exactly..."

Josh furrowed his brow in further confusion.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

When Talia looked up, he saw remorse in her eyes.

"There's this guy..." she started.

"The guy on the motorbike..."

"Yes. He's someone from my past. You have to understand, when we started going out, I thought I'd put all that behind me." The look in her eyes implored him to understand.

"And now...?"

Talia bit her lip.

"When I saw him at the school yesterday...I had to talk to him. I had to clear some things up. I didn't have time for explanations; the guy wouldn't have waited for me."

"You haven't answered my question Talia."

"I'm with you now, aren't I?"

Josh sighed.

"What's this guy's name?"

"Valdis..."

"Talia, please be honest with me here. Is there something going on between you and this Valdis guy?"

Talia looked at him straight in the eyes before answering.

She had done a lot of thinking in the past couple of hours. Valdis was bad for her. Had she met him before she turned from the Underworld, things would have been different. But she hadn't. On the other hand, Josh had always been good to her. More than good...he had been absolutely wonderful. True, she didn't feel the same exhilarating rush of emotions when she was with him that she felt when she was with Valdis, but she still cared for him a lot, and despite what she and Valdis had done, she could not stand seeing him hurt. He needed her. He needed her more than Valdis ever did. He needed her emotionally and he needed her protection as a witch.

"Perhaps once upon a time there could have been," she said reaching a hand to stroke Josh's face, "but whatever was between me and Valdis is over now. I promise, Josh."

Josh looked at her for a long time. Then, tentatively, he took the hand that had still been touching his face, in his own, and said, "If you say so, Talia, I believe you."

He placed a soft kiss in her palm. As Talia stared deep into his blue eyes, she felt her own stinging with unshed tears of guilt. A voice inside her whispered an oath. She would never let anything bad come to Josh. Not if she could help it!

****************************

Cole sat back in his bed, gingerly brushing his fingers over the picture of Phoebe and him.  It was one of the only keepsakes of his former life he had kept.  Despite the influence of the Evil inside him, Cole could not rid himself of it...or of his wedding ring.

It was at times like these, when Cole was alone, not surrounded by advisors and subservient demons, when his humanity pierced the thick veil of evil inside.  He often thought of his life with Phoebe, and how things could have been different.  Lately, he thought of Talia.  Hot-headed, stubborn as hell...she was a Halliwell through and through.

Cole missed her more than he would ever openly admit.

He pinched the bridge of his nose, trying unsuccessfully to will the pain away.  For years that pain had been a constant companion, almost like an old friend. But now, as eternity stretched before him, Cole never felt more alone in his long life.

Cole leaned over his bedside table and pulled the drawer to reveal his third treasure; a picture of Talia and him. It had been taken the previous summer at Pontikonissi. Their last summer there, he now knew. The two of them had loved their little Greek island. It was one of the two places where they could really be a family.

Phoebe would have loved it too.

In the picture, he held Talia in his arms and she smiled up at him the way only a child could smile at her father. She had idolized him. He was her whole world and she was his. It was shortly afterwards when things had gone all wrong.

She had grown attached to her victim. Cole of all people knew how that felt. He had tried to help her to get past it, but he had known it was no use. Her whole world went tumbling down and all he could do was watch. He knew that she would never again look at him the way she had, when that picture was taken.

Using a little of the magic he had used to make the rose blossom for Phoebe, Cole concentrated on the two pictures.

Before his very eyes, the two pictures merged. A smiling Cole now stood in the photo with his arms around the two women he loved. They were both smiling up at him. His family...the life they could have had together.

Cole looked at the new picture for a long time. It was too late now, he knew. That life was not meant to be. Each of their destinies lay on different paths.

But as Cole stared at the three of them, a new sense of determination flooded through him. He once again renewed a vow that he had made many times before. Talia and Phoebe were all that mattered, and he was damned if he would let anything happen to them! He would protect them with his dying breath if need be!

This resolution remade, he finally put away the picture, and with a wave of his hand extinguished the light, plunging the room into darkness.

TO BE CONTINUED...